The whole world trembled and dissolved into a colorful nothingness. There was probably still a sky since air entered his lungs in labored sips and gentle gusts of wind futilely tried to cool his burning skin. And there was likely solid ground underneath, but he felt so light as if his feet barely touched it. He was flying, cradling his treasure to his chest, equally exalted and terrified. One wrong touch and she might get crushed. Yet, if he loosened his grip, she might fly away and leave him. The thunder in his chest made him deaf for all sound save the melody of her words.
“N… Noah!”
Her shy voice was sweeter than honey, lovelier than the songs of the finest minstrels, more calming than the humm of a fresh spring. It was a healing balm that seeped into the cracks of his shattered heart and soul. He was drunk on it. Helplessly lost, as if hearing it for the first time. She was his enchantress, his siren, his bliss and sin. Should this voice demand anything, be it his life or the stars and the moon, he’d offer them without hesitation.
The warmth of her body flowed into his even through the layers of clothes - she was his personal sun, his light. In a brief moment of clarity, he realized that should he lose her, a beast more terrible than anything a man had ever witnessed would emerge. And so he swore, not to the gods or saints, or spirits but to her soul, that he’ll protect her, cherish her, and make sure his precious bird never felt the need to fly away. He’d trap her… No! He’d never do that! Her happiness was his happiness. And if someday she wanted to leave him despite his efforts… he’d rather be a beast to all but her. She had the freedom to choose. All he had was the hope that she’d choose him.
His fingers stroke her soft skin, half numb and half burning. His gaze traced the straight line of her nose, the dark thin arches of her brows, the pearly tears welling in her beautiful eyes. He hated the sight of crying women and children. But here she was, crying in his arms, crying because of him, and he was the happiest man under the sun! Because, behind the tears, the most radiant smile was directed at him. As if he too was her whole world as she was his. Never again! He’d never give her a reason to shed tears of sadness! She deserved only sunshine and bliss.
The pair of rosy lips, slightly parted, attracted his gaze and kept it captive. He could see the trace of red where she had bitten them, but this only seemed to accentuate their soft perfection. Oh, how long had he yearned for them! How many dreams and nightmares had been started and ended by them? In the twisted spirit world of Nerodris, they had saved his life and soul. But was the fleeting memory of a lucid dream anything compared to the real thing? Yearning lit up in his chest anew, and he neither could nor wanted to subdue it. This time, he didn’t have to.
“Lorelei, would you…” His hoarse voice broke as he was engulfed by a sudden fear. A knot clogged his throat. Pathetic! The Lord of Norden, the fearsome Beast of the North, was trembling like a youngling. Showing doubt and weakness! The mountain was crumbling, the shield was cracking, but it was alright. Before her, he could be weak, he could be vulnerable… he could be strong and steadfast. Whatever he was, he felt that she would accept him. Yet a tinge of apprehension still remained as he cleared his throat. “Would you like me to kiss you?”
The blood drumming in his ears silenced her words, but there was no need to hear. The smile on the rosy lips bloomed even brighter and her trembling hands around him tightened their grip.
The kiss incinerated all doubt and fear. It was as soft as a feather, sweeter than bliss, worth more than life. It was their first kiss, not one between a demon and a spirit but between a man and a woman. For a while, he didn’t dare lose himself in the moment, fearing that the call of nature and his long-suppressed desire might ruin it. But the lips seeking his were just as eager and needy. The arms flung around his neck and the fingers entangled in his hair were just as daring.
He let go of reason completely.
If there was happiness, he was indulging in it to the fullest. Every touch was like a sip of water to a thirsting wretch - quenching the need, yet demanding more. His lips whispered sweet nothings. No, it wasn’t nothing but the deepest secrets of his heart. And she replied, teasing sweetly and fanning his flames. He didn’t deserve her, yet he wasn’t ready to give her up. Not to a man, a saint, or even the gods!
‘Please, be mine!’ his soul screamed as he briefly let go of her lips and allowed himself to sink into the brown depths of her eyes. And as she looked back at him, he knew the answer without her uttering a word - ‘I already am.’
A hearty laughter rose from his chest, his happiness more than he could contain. Forgetting his standing, their situation, and any repercussions, he lifted Lorelei in his arms and twirled her around. They were not the esteemed Duke and Duchess of Norden, the fearsome Beast and benevolent Swallow, just two lovers in a world of their own.
Yet at the height of his elation, reality reared its head to spoil the moment. Sharp pain flared up from his injured thigh, making him lose his balance. As they were falling, fear sobered him up and he made sure to cushion Lorelei’s fall. The stream of her familiar nagging and the gentle care and worry on her face quickly soothed the throbbing pain in his new bumps and bruises, better than any ointment could. He allowed himself to be pulled up and even leaned a bit on Lorelei’s shoulder as she supported him through the hallways, still careful not to crush her with his weight.
“Noah?” Her sweet voice tickled his ears, making them burn. “Are you really fine?”
“Never been better.”
“Are you sure you didn’t hit your head?”
“Yes. Why?”
“You’re grinning like a fool.”
“Well, that’s what love turns a man into.” He twisted his neck slightly, giving her a peck on the forehead. “Alas, it’s an incurable condition, my fair physician.”
“Oh, really?” She raised an eyebrow but her flaming cheeks didn’t match her sternness.
“Indeed. And even if there was a cure, I’d spit it out faster than poison.”
“What a delusional rambling!” she huffed, and swallowed a smile. Her hand pressed against his forehead and her cheerfulness dimmed. “You are warm. You might have a fever. It seems your injury was more serious than I thought.”
You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.
“I can assure you, the source of my current ailment is definitely not the scratch on my leg.”
“Then what is it, Master Physician?”
“I’d say a burning heart, fairest and most worrisome amongst wives.”
Her giggle further sped up the drumming in his chest. Her sparkling gaze enchanted him stronger than any hex.
“Honestly, I never knew you were such a romantic.”
“Well, until now, I was lacking an audience worthy of my gift,” he replied with a boyish grin, but the next step brought him a new wave of pain. His attempt to stifle his hiss failed and the world blurred a bit again. Maybe she was right and he was really developing a fever, but he’d be damned to allow a stupid flesh wound to disrupt his happy moment.
Noah opened his mouth to calm her down and reassure her of his well-being, but Lorelei had already called upon a flustered novice and ordered him to bring one of the infirmarian’s assistants to his cell. Her instructions called a bitter-sweet smile to his face.
“You know, my dear, when you are at it, you can sound more menacing and demanding than my generals.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment, my lord.”
“A compliment it is, but still, I find your action itself disturbingly unnecessary. How can you allow some unknown man to touch your precious husband?”
Unexpectedly, Lorelei staggered and their bodies bumped and swayed together. Deep red spots bloomed on her cheeks and she avoided his questioning gaze.
“W-well…” she mumbled, chewing on her lip, “considering the… location of the wound and… the necessary removal of… ahem… covering, and the position one needs to take to treat it…. And we are on hallowed grounds… and already disturbed the decorum…”
Now was time for Noah’s cheeks to ignite. Alas, the heat also quickly traveled down his spine and he cursed his vivid imagination.
“Of course, you are right!” he laughed nervously. “Wouldn’t want us to get accused of licentious behavior…”
‘... again!’ finished a nasty voice in his head.
Noah halted abruptly, clenching his chest. Cold shower ran down his spine and his stomach turned when the images started flooding in. No! He didn’t want them! He didn’t want to remember. Not now. Not ever! Yet he was powerless to stop the memories. He was holding Pricilla in his hands. The same dirty hands that were touching Lorelei now. His lips had ravished Pricilla’s. Had it been the same as when he kissed Lorelei!? No! Of course not! The pure and innocent joy they had shared, the realization that their very souls were part of a single whole, it had nothing to do with the carnal madness he had experienced with that woman.
Another spasm tore his chest and he stifled a howl.
Carnal madness? Yet he had received pleasure nonetheless. It had been for a moment - a relief that everything was over; that he could stop fighting and his mind and body could finally be at peace; that the pain and the unbearable pressure were finally released. A brief, numbing, empty pleasure, before the guilt had torn him to pieces. Before the disgust. The slowly creeping awareness of his actions, and the even more horrid realization that during the whole act, he had seen Lorelei in his embrace.
His knees almost gave out and he leaned heavily against the rough stone wall. Pricilla’s twisted features overlapped with Lorelei’s worried face.
“Noah? Noah!” The panic in her voice made the pain in his chest even worse. “Hang in there! Somebody help!”
“All is good,” he squeezed through his teeth, fighting the urge to vomit.
A strong arm pulled him upright and one of his knights took his weight off Lorelei’s shoulders. Even Duncan and William’s heads popped in the corner of his eyes.
“Worry not, my fretful nannies! I can manage the way to my room. Clear the procession.” His feeble attempt to joke around his condition didn’t get a pass. Surrounded by his friends and still firmly holding Lorelei’s hand, their group reached his cell at the same time the infirmarian’s aide arrived.
Under Lorelei’s watchful gaze, Noah was laid on the bed. While the middle-aged priest prepared his tinctures and bandages, she milled around and gave him instructions.
“It would be best to stop the bleeding with powdered yarrow mixed with a bit of honey. If the wound is too big, maybe we should stitch it, but don’t use hot iron. Since he is slightly feverish, a willow-bark tea will do him good. And he was clutching his chest, so-”
“Placate yourself, child!” The priest interrupted her with a benign smile. “I’ve been in this trade for decades. The Duke is in safe hands. Please, wait outside until I change his bandages.”
Noah saw her biting her lip and staring at him intently, fighting her hesitation. He hurried and gave her a nod, turning around even before she had left the room. The door didn’t click shut and he was sure that, should he look over his shoulder, he’d see the shadow of her back in the crack. He… couldn’t bear looking at her right now.
The priest’s gentle fingers on his thigh brought him a new wave of nausea. Every touch of the foreign skin was a nightmare, whispering between his temples. Sweat beaded his forehead, but he willed his face to remain as rigid and aloof as possible. And yet, every glance the cleric threw at him seemed to carry accusation and chastisement, like he could see right in Noah’s head and observe his dirty deed. Well, it was no wonder. By now, probably the whole temple knew about his transgression with Pricilla.
With a sigh, the priest tied the bandage and shook his head. He then pulled the blanket over him and stood up.
“You need some good rest, Your Highness. And the Duchess too.” He left a small bundle of herbs on the table. “I’ll send a novice with more hot water. Half of the herb is for you, the other half - for the Lady. You can’t heal without some good sleep so keep the visitation short.”
The moment he opened the door, Lorelei rushed back in and took the seat next to Noah’s bed. He desperately needed her by his side, but at the same time, couldn’t stand to be near her. These contradicting feelings were tearing his chest apart with every sip of air.
“You heard him. I’ll survive,” he said hoarsely, still refraining from meeting her gaze.
“I did.”
“You should really follow his advice and go to rest.”
“I won’t. Not before you’ve taken your medicine.”
“I figured.” His lips quivered and he dared a glance. Her precious, warm eyes, full of love, worry, and accusation pierced him. He wanted to hug her again but didn’t dare to. “I’m sorry… I ruined a perfect moment.”
“You did no such thing. Besides, I do hope that there will be more of those in the future.”
“You mean me shaking and bleeding in your arms?”
“Impossible man!”
“I’m sorry…”
“You should be!” Her words made him flinch.
“I sure should,” he whispered and was about to continue when Lorelei grabbed his hand and squeezed it firmly between her palms.
“Well, since I’m benevolent, I forgive you.” Her teasing smile was a balm and a dagger to his heart.
‘But I can't forgive myself!’ he wanted to say aloud, however, the knot in his throat conveniently swelled. All he could do was pull her hands to his lips and give them a soft kiss.