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The Beast and The Swallow
III-39. Dark shadows

III-39. Dark shadows

Gallantly assisted by Noah, Lorelei took her seat at the main table, her cheeks still burning from the unexpectedly jubilant welcome. She threw her husband a secret gaze and saw a thin smile lifting the corner of his lips. His mischievousness almost made her break character, which would have been highly improper since the Duchess was not supposed to giggle like a little girl. Still, the green faces of her father and sister and the mortified stares they gave her were a balm to her wounded soul. Never in her life had she experienced this feeling of… being the superior one, the most brilliant one.

‘Don’t let it get to your head!’ she chastised herself, secretly stroking the magnificent Shareeban silk of her dress. It felt like cool water spun into threads and woven together with starlight. This dress… had taken several seamstresses a month to finish!

For a moment, her heart tightened. Did she even have the right to wear something like this? This dress wasn’t suited for her but rather for the next Duchess Norden. The real one. The princess. Why… Why did Noah gift her something so precious? And not only that. Every dress he had ordered for her was a small piece of art. As if… he liked seeing her wear gorgeous gowns. Her? The fake, low-born nobody? It was preposterous to dare think that he… That he could really see her as… a lady worthy of his attention?

‘It isn’t rare for noblemen to endow their concubines with fineries,’ whispered a dark voice from deep in her heart. ‘Be honest with yourself. You have nothing to offer him but your body.’

Lorelei swallowed hard and pushed back the dark thoughts. She realized her worth, or rather, the lack thereof. She knew that the only life together with Noah feasible for the likes of her was the one as a mistress. But would he even agree to take her as one, knowing his aversion to the practices of the imperial family and the nobility? Would his honor allow him to cheat on his legal wife? Knowing him…

She bit her lip and her fingers caressed the cool silk. Still… couldn’t she, just for tonight, for this fleeting moment, wasn’t she allowed to forget everything and enjoy the festivities? Her eyes rose, only to be captured by Noah’s gaze. He leaned in and whispered in her ear, his breath igniting her skin.

“I didn’t lie, did I? Now everyone knows who the brightest star in Norden is.”

“You didn’t,” was all she could whisper back over the loud drums of her heart. Noah seemed to notice her fluster and the sparks in his eyes burned stronger.

“Raise your head proudly, Duchess, and show those pesky flies who the mistress of this land is.”

Looking over his shoulder, Lorelei could see her father and sister. Count Orten stood agape, ogling her and slightly shaking, as if his mind was unable to process the fact that the person before him was indeed his spurned offspring. His stupefaction seemed even stronger than in the morning, or maybe it was the cumulative effect of both events that had broken something in him. Sitting next to her father, Pricilla looked like a golden doll. Her usually big eyes were now even bigger, and her tiny rosy mouth was slightly parted, her lips curving into an incredulous smile. But behind that polished facade, Lorelei could clearly glimpse her true feelings. A minuscule twitch jolted the corners of her sister’s mouth as she fought the urge to twist them in revulsion. Her gaze too was far from innocent, as Lorelei knew very well. Pricilla’s fluttering lashes could not hide the poison and envy in her gaze. Envy? That same Pricilla, who received all the fineries in the world, all the respect and adoration?

Studying her more carefully, Lorelei noticed that her sister’s eyes moved from time to time ever so subtly, their second target being Noah. To her amazement, she discerned in their depths not the expected disgust but rather desire! A vicious jab made Lorelei’s heart quiver. She knew that look all too well. Whatever Pricilla wanted to have, she would have, whether it was beau or bounty. And she wouldn't hesitate to use any means necessary. The gazes she was throwing at Noah right now were those of a hungry fox. But why the change of heart? At their wedding, Pricilla was clearly repulsed by his looks and didn’t try to hide her disdain and aversion.

The uneasiness in Lorelei’s heart grew. She frowned, but, suddenly, a familiar rough palm gently touched her chin, guiding her to face Noah again.

“My Duchess, if you frown like that you’ll get wrinkles.” He winked. “If there are unpleasant things, just don’t look at them. I want you to enjoy tonight.”

Lorelei nodded and lowered her head, moving away from his soft grip against her will. But she had to! The desire to take his hand and guide it up her cheek and towards her lips to give it a kiss was almost irresistible. She couldn’t do that in front of so many people! It was even doubtful she could do it had they been in private. But despite the restraints of propriety and the protests of sound logic, her body acknowledged its desire. She shivered and took a large sip from her goblet, the sweet wine cooling her throat and flaming the fire in her cheeks.

As the night progressed, the storms in her heart and mind ebbed and flowed, and Noah’s behavior didn’t make reigning in her feelings any easier. Throughout the dinner, her devilish husband was the most attentive partner, personally filling her cup and putting carefully selected slices of meat on her plate, actions he hadn’t performed even during the festivities for the Grand Council. Although Lorelei suspected all this to be an act to spite her family, she couldn’t deny the elation she experienced every time their hands brushed against each other or their fingers touched. The songs of the minstrels, the jovial chatter, the strong wine, all that transported Lorelei into a new world. One without the disdain of her family, without the curse of being nesvet, without the wounds of the past. There were only Noah’s gray eyes and his deep melodious voice.

Soon, the servants took away the last platters and the music picked up. As protocol dictated, the Duke and Duchess of Norden were to lead the first dance. Going to the center of the hall hand in hand, Noah bowed and confidently initiated the first figure. Following his guidance, Lorelei let the melody permeate her body. The last time they danced was during the Grand Council. Back then, her limbs had felt like iron bars, frozen by the fear of making a mistake and ruining the reputation of the ducal household. But tonight, all she yearned for was to hold Noah’s hand. To feel his strong arms around her waist as they twirled, guided by the song of the pipes and lutes. To mourn his loss when the steps of the dance dictated for them to separate and rejoice in the desperately desired reunion thereafter.

With the last accord and the last bow, the dance ended. Breathing heavily, Lorelei staggered slightly but was immediately supported by Noah.

“It seems dancing is still a bit too strenuous for you,” he said, the shadow of worry darkening his smile. “I should have known and not-”

“Your Highness,” Lorelei beamed at him and shook her head, “this was the most wonderful night in my life. Don’t blacken it with regret, for I feel none of the like.”

Noah looked deep into her eyes. For a couple of seconds, the world seemed to shrink and the only beings present were the two of them. Lorelei had heard stories from Saya about sparks flying when sharing a look with Gerash, but she had always thought it exaggerated. Yet now, her body and soul were ablaze. Every fiber of her being yearned for him, called for him. And in his gaze, she thought she saw a similar desire…

“Your Highness,” Pricilla’s sweet voice dispelled the magic and returned Lorelei to the present, “would you give me the honor of the next dance?”

Looking at her sister, Lorelei almost snorted in disgust. Pricilla was standing before them in her revealing dress of golden splendor but was still acting like a bashful girl throwing shy glances from under fluttering eyelids. Imagining her dancing with Noah made Lorelei’s blood boil and the snake of jealousy coiled around her heart. But what could she do? It was both good manners and court protocol for the lord of the castle to dance with the most esteemed guest after the opening dance.

“Pardon me, Lady Orten, but it seems that you have been misinformed.” Noah’s reply startled everyone, including Lorelei. Turning to the main table, he bowed and offered his hand to the old, white-haired woman sitting there. “Kush-turgan Akasha, as the highest ranking lady present, would you accompany me through the second dance?”

“But she can’t even stand straight!”

Pricilla’s whisper was loud enough to be heard by all. Furious, Lorelei was about to reprimand her, but Kash-baba was quicker. Jumping from her seat, she scooted and grabbed Noah’s extended hand.

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

“Thank you, Young Wolf. These old bones were aching for some movement.”

The music picked up again. From her seat at the main table, Lorelei laughed and clapped together with the rest of the guests as Noah and the Binshi twirled around each other at speeds no one had thought possible from someone as old as the honorable Grand Elder. Suddenly, there was the scraping of a chair and a ruff hand grabbed her arm.

“How could you allow this?” Count Orten’s hiss made Lorelei freeze, the old memories from her childhood resurfacing and gagging her.

“F-father, I-”

“How could you let that man insult your sister like this?!” His fingers clawed deeper into her arm. “To dance with a barbarian instead of the imperial envoy! This is an insult to the Imperial Family! And you just stood by and held your mouth shut!”

“Well, isn’t this what you have been beating into me my whole life?” Mustering up all the courage she had, Lorelei tore her arm away and looked her father in the eyes. “Someone like me should know her place and not raise her voice when the ones of status are talking. The likes of me should shut their traps and follow their betters’ orders. I simply followed your teachings like a filial daughter.”

“You little!” Her father growled and leaned in, his free hand raising for a swing. Suddenly a loud shriek and clatter rang behind them. It was followed by a rain of red wine that bathed Count Orten.

“Oh, my l-lord!” Jessup’s stuttering, high-pitched voice rang in the hall. “Oh, clumsy me! I’m so sorry! Oh, have mercy on me! I was so startled seeing you sit in the Duke’s chair that my whole body shook and… Oh, have mercy, let me clean up your gown!”

“Stop, you imbecile!”

Count Orten tried to push the youth away as he had started to smear even further the wine over the precious brocade coat. However, the push seemed a bit too strong. Jessup tumbled backward, his flailing arms toppling over a few full goblets from the table and spilling their content in Pricilla’s lap. With a scream that could break glass, her sister shot up from her seat, red wine dripping down her golden dress.

The music stopped and all heads turned at the main table. Unable to stand the barrage of stares and the poorly suppressed snickers, Pricilla gave out a small whimper and dashed away to her chambers. Cursing loudly, Count Orten spat at Jessup and hurried after his daughter.

Sitting frozen in her chair, Lorelei blinked confused at the young squire lying between the table and the turned-over chairs. As instinct overcame the initial confusion, she pulled out her handkerchief and leaned over to the youth.

“Jess, dear, are you alright?”

“Never been better, my lady.” Dusting his clothes, he jumped to his feet, a mischievous smile erasing the perplexed confusion from his face in an instant. He then turned to Duncan, who was grinning viciously a few seats away, and bowed.

“Atta lad!” The old knight bellowed and winked. “You did a marvelous job!”

“I second that.” Noah’s voice sounded next to them.

Looking up, Lorelei saw his jubilant expression as he led Kash-baba back to her seat. However, his eyes were cold and spelling danger.

“My lord!” Lorelei pulled at his sleeve. “Please, don’t punish Jess too harshly. He just-”

“Punish him? For what? We all saw that Count Orten was waving his arms around in the worst possible moment and made our Jessup stumble. He reaped what he sowed.”

A chorus murmur raised from the table, confirming the Duke’s statement.

Leaning towards Lorelei, Noah offered her his hand.

“My lady, as much as I would like to invite you to a second dance, I believe it would be wise to retire for the night and recuperate. May I escort you to your chambers?”

“Thank you, my lord. I’ll be in your care.”

As the two walked away from the brilliance of the Grand Hall and into the twilight of Ildemar’s corridors, Lorelei leaned more and more on Noah’s shoulder, her legs feeling like lead. He adjusted his step and silently guided her through the night.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“What for?”

“It seems I caused trouble again.”

“Why are you taking your father’s wrongs upon yourself?” His voice was gentle but a tinge of anger was clearly audible.

“If I had acted differently… If I had been more resolute… or maybe more diplomatic... I don’t know. Maybe I could have prevented that altercation.”

“And if your father had an ounce of propriety he would have been canonized as a saint. Enough, Lorelei. You are not responsible for his mistakes.”

“But I was completely useless. If Sir Duncan and Jessup hadn’t intervened…”

“I would have cut your father’s hand there and then.” His grip around her waist tightened and she felt the warmth of his body seeping into hers. “You know, my lady, it is a knight’s job to deal with monsters. And there is no shame in receiving help and protection from the people who hold you in their hearts.”

“May I remind you this the next time you decide to act recklessly on your own?”

“That stung, my fair physician! It seems that you are feeling better.” He chuckled. “Honestly, your tongue can be sharper than my sword. With that weapon, there is no need to fear anything.”

“Alas, some monsters are impervious to words.”

Noah stopped abruptly and his eyes studied her face.

“Should I kill him?” The words were quiet but still made her body shiver.

“W-what?”

“Should I kill that tick? One word from you and I’ll smash him like the bug he is. He will have a hunting accident or a drunken tumble and would forever disappear under the snows of Norden.”

“He is my father!” Lorelei pushed Noah away and fear spread into her heart. Not from Noah’s proposal but from the fact that, for a split second, she’d been tempted to agree. “I can’t harm my father!”

“But he can harm you?” He put his hands on her shoulders. “Don’t try to deny it. I’ve seen you look at him. I know this look all too well. No father brings such fear into his child’s gaze. No father treats his daughter as an object.”

“Enough!” Lorelei felt the tears roll down her cheeks and brushed them away. “Please, I… don’t want to talk about this. About him. It was such a beautiful evening. Please, let’s not ruin it with talks of murder.”

“But you’ll have to meet with those two in the coming days. If you want, I’ll let Neli and Will handle the preparations for the Crown Prince’s visit?”

“No.” Lorelei lifted up her chin. “I’ll do it. A monster is no longer scary once you face it. I'll face my family and I’ll prevail. But I’ll do it my way.”

“And I’ll support you all the way.” Noah cupped her cheeks. “And I promise, as long as he doesn’t lay a finger on you, I won’t act. But if he does… I hope you can forgive me.”

Looking into his eyes, Lorelei knew he wasn’t joking. Cold fear and fluttering happiness collided in her chest. Her fingers caressed the backside of his palm. She could feel him jolt. His eyes were so close that she could drown in their depths. She wanted to have those eyes look only at her. She wanted to melt in his embrace, forgetting all the pain and the dark memories. She wanted to drink the sweetness of his kisses and give him her everything.

His warm breath mixed with hers as he leaned his forehead against hers. One of his hands brushed a hair behind her ear and slid down, caressing her neck and trailing her collarbone. It was the gentlest touch, and yet it burned. But the fire his fingers left behind pulled on some broken strings. The slight fragrance of wine she could smell from his breath suddenly became a pungent drunken stench. The welcoming darkness of early summer morphed into the sticky murk of the stables, and then into the opium-filled den of Master Argente. They had touched her too - her face, her neck, her lips. Their dirty hands had left their traces. She was dirty. And now, he was touching the same places! As the images overlapped, Lorelei’s body reacted on its own.

“No!”

She pushed Noah away with all her might and recoiled from her own thrust. Tumbling back, she almost fell to the ground, her large eyes looking at the dazed Noah. Shaking like a leaf, she took a few steps back.

“I… I…”

“Lorelei?”

“I’m s-sorry! I’m so sorry! I…”

The words choked her and she just shook her head as the air left her chest in jagged heaves. She spun around and, gathering her skirts, fled away into the night.

“Lorelei!” Noah stretched out his hand and was about to jump after her, but something halted his step. Head hung between his shoulders, he remained in the corridor for what seemed an eternity before quietly walking in the opposite direction.

Without any of them noticing, Neli stepped out from a niche in the wall. Throwing a glance at both Lorelei and Noah’s escape routes, the old Marzbanati sighed and disappeared back into the shadows.