Chapter 3

Mirror Mirror

I stood as straight as I could, I found that my new normal posture was more than a little hunched over. It felt a little awkward and strange at first but over the course of only a minute or so it started to feel more comfortable. While I got accustomed to standing with my new body, I took the time to actually look around the room. It may as well have been a large wooden box, there were no windows, and the only door I saw was opened to a closet. I saw an assortment of clothing hanging inside, and I thought that it would make a perfect next step in my new life. But standing still a while longer seemed to be the right call, so I continued looking around.

The wall to my right was covered with a giant mirror. I looked at it with great interest. I already knew my new body was big, but seeing my reflection, I realized why my charisma was so low. I was massive, thick fur hid the definition of my muscles, but I looked like I could rip a tree up and use it as a club. My eyes were a glowing swirl of blue, yellow, and green. What passed for a pupil was the dark center of a constantly moving whirlpool of color. There was a light blue glowing patch on my forehead too.

Upon inspection, I saw an assortment of strange runes that I couldn't make heads or tails of. As I peered at it I knew it to be the mark of the goddess, and I knew its glow meant that her eyes were on me. I reached up and touched it, but felt nothing more than a slightly warmer patch of fur. I was wondering if I should say something to her, but before I could think of what to say, I felt a wave of warm comfort flow through me, and the mark winked out leaving a blank white space, though I could still somehow feel its presence. I decided to ignore whatever that just was, and continue looking at my new body.

Evaluating myself further, I noticed the large ears perched near the top of my head were pointed like a house cat's with little black tufts on the top. They were not rounded like I remember them being on tigers. I turned my head, as much as I could while still looking at the mirror, I realized my fur was thicker around my throat, and the back and top of my head. Was that a mane? I ran my claws through it like a comb to verify that it was slightly longer there. It still had the same black stripes as the rest of my coat. I looked at my hands in the mirror, from that perspective it was very obvious that they were over-eager paws. The one nice thing about them was, unless I flexed them, my claws were hidden in the fur on the backs of my fingers. It had seemed like they were too big to hide that way, but I guess not. Maybe it was magic? I shrugged and moved on with my inspection.

My tail, which was currently held high behind me, was thick enough that I could conceivably use it as a weapon, though remembering how it felt when I fell on it earlier, I shelved that idea. It did mean I would really need to learn to control it. As if on cue, it started curling back and forth a bit on its own. I noticed there was a fluffy black tuft at the end like you would expect to see on a lion. I was somewhat baffled by the weird mixture of cats I seemed to embody.

After getting a good look at myself. I felt a strange pride swell up in me. My instincts assured me that I was very handsome indeed, and anyone who felt otherwise best not mention it. I shook my head at that thought, and moved on.

The bed in the middle of the room was massive, stuffed with what looked like down, and it was an absolute mess. Apparently when I threw myself on the floor earlier my claws had gouged huge rents into fabric, exposing the stuffing. I chuffed to myself, feeling more than a little embarrassed at how much unintended damage my clumsy first moments in this new body had done. I continued to survey my small new territory.

There wasn't much left to look at. There was a large well cushioned arm chair pushed up against a sturdy wooden desk. I looked at the chair dubiously. Trying to figure out how chairs would work out with my new body. Not well, I surmised, but it would be something I would have to figure out if I was going to be dealing with people. No one liked sitting when their conversation partner was standing. My instincts helpfully informed me that sitting before a stranger was either dangerous, or submissive. Two things it would fight me on.

I thought about that for a moment, the instincts were supposed to be helpful, but it felt like I had a stranger in my head. They whispered to me with idea forms, and tugged on my emotions. The fact that they were the instincts of a predator was definitely going to cause me trouble. My good old fashioned human intuition told me that much.

"Don't worry so much," the little dragon said from his perch, causing me to break from my thoughts and snap to look at him. "I don't know what you're worried about, but I can feel the worry. I'm here to help you! What's got you all bound up in thought?"

I shrugged "I keep getting feelings from my instincts. They feel, not exactly aggressive, but like I constantly need to be the dominant creature in the area. I'm worried about what will happen when someone pushes me. I don't understand why the System gave them to me when I'm supposed to integrate with humans. Seems counterproductive"

The little dragon inclined his head at me. "Are you planning on letting the instincts rule you?"

"No, of course not, but I feel emotional spikes from them. Those could be trouble, it's hard to keep a level head when you are angry. Remember when we first spoke? You said you thought I was a tiger demihuman? I wanted to rip your head off." Actually just mentioning it caused me to feel anger again. My tail started lashing, and my lips pulled back a little. I growled "Feel that? That was a strong response to an incredibly fuckin' stupid stimulus."

The dragon shifted a bit, his tail lashed, and his wings spread a bit. "Strong enough to bleed through the link. I see."

He took several deep calming breaths, and so did I. When we calmed down, he continued. "So that's a goal while we are here, but ah, there's a notice from the System that the aids you have been given will take time to integrate, mood swings are expected, but should resolve themselves with time. I suggest we just carry on, and deal with them as they come. I have many concepts that I need to introduce to you."

"Well, that makes me feel a little better, I'm still not sure I like these 'aids' very much. Oh well, since there's nothing we can do but wait, I would like to see if I can walk over there." I pointed at the closet."I'm feeling pretty comfortable standing now."

I took a step, overbalanced immediately, and landed on all fours. With my new body I found that far more comfortable than standing. I wanted to be able to walk on two legs, both for myself, and because I doubted humans would take someone walking on all fours very seriously. My tail swished in annoyance, throwing off my balance as I struggled to stand up again. "Remember not to get in your own way, just walk, don't think about how to walk." I muttered to myself as I gave it another try. To my surprise I managed it. I made it the whole ten steps to the closet without falling over! I mentally snarked to myself, what an accomplishment! I'd be using the potty like a big boy in no time!

Once I reached my destination, I chuffed, amused at my own thoughts. I reached out to start looking through the options, and accidentally used my claws when I grabbed the first shirt. It was ruined, the claws sliced through it like butter. The System saying I had six Dexterity felt high, considering how clumsy I was.

I tried again, I moved slowly and delicately took a different shirt out of the closet. When I managed to successfully handle the shirt without putting holes in it, I mentally cheered. I looked it over, it was a huge long sleeved black button up that I thought would fit me perfectly. I carefully pulled it on. Ten minutes later I had yet to manage a single button, I did give it a few more button holes though. I growled at my inability to perform a simple task with the sausages I had impersonating fingers. I tore the shirt apart and threw the scraps on the floor. My tail was lashing hard enough that it would have been a danger to anything behind me.

"Calm down," said the peanut gallery. I roared at him, I was so angry I wanted to swat him off his perch. I could almost feel how satisfying it would be to take out my anger on something. I stared at him, and the room seemed to get smaller as I tensed my muscles ready to pounce. "STOP" the little guy yelled. I felt love and concern flood to me through our bond.

This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

I deflated, slumping down to the floor as the anger lost its hold. Trembling like a leaf, I tried to apologize, but my mouth didn't work right, and it came out as a grumbling growl.

I heard a flutter of wings as my dragon buddy flew down to the carpet in front of me, he looked so tiny. I reached out a hand to pet his back. But my hand was bigger than he was, a lot bigger, and it was truly a paw. My eyes widened in shock, as I yanked my paw away. I tried to ask what was going on, but it came out as nonsensical growls and grumbles. I tried to stand back up, and found myself instinctively doing so on four legs. I didn't know what to do, I didn't know what I had done to get like this. I began to panic a bit. I tried to picture my stat page, but I lacked the focus, and it didn't appear.

"Easy there, calm down, you're making it hard for me to think." The tiny dragon said softly.

I sniffed, and chuffed at him, incredulous. "Hard for you to think, how do you think I feel?"

The little dragon jumped so hard, I think he left some scales behind. When he landed I felt his happiness and pride crash through the bond. "You figured that out so fast! You didn't even need help. See? Those instincts aren't all bad."

I thought about what I had done. I wanted him to hear me, and I just.. thought at him really hard? I narrowed my eyes, focusing on him hearing what I wanted to say. Nothing happened, that wasn't it. I really wanted to tell him I was sorry. Something happened, and that time I noticed what I had instinctively done. I took some energy from a well inside myself, packaged the thought in it, and just kind of pushed it at him with my mind. "I'm sorry." I tried to repeat the process on purpose "I'm really sorry" I think some emotion went with it on the second sending. Not like he didn't already feel it through the bond.

"It's okay, you can't hurt me anyway." He spread his tiny wings. "The System put me in charge of this space to train you. You gave me permission to do what I need to do to assist you. I can stop you, and I did, right?"

"Right, I'm still sorry." I sighed.

"Well, this bedroom construct was not made with that form in mind, let's get you changed back. I'm guessing you need to be calm to do that. So try to relax, take a minute and look at yourself in the mirror too. I bet you'll think that form is pretty cool!" My little friend gestured with his head toward the mirror wall.

I looked over, I was thickly built, barrel chested, with limbs that resembled tree trunks. My mane was much more noticeable in this form, it was much thicker than the rest of my fur. I looked like a giant white lion, but with large pointy ears, and a somewhat more pronounced nose. Then I noticed my stripes, they weren't black, they were glowing, just like my eyes. The stripes worked their way down from top of my back. Shifting streams of glowing blue, yellow, and green spiraled together. The tri-colored stripes lightly emitting ephemeral flames as they.seemed to flow through my fur. "I am definitely not a tiger."

"Nope, you're a Mana Beast, they are more like the Concept of an animal, they are very rare, and only occur near cracks in Reality. Your body was created from mana, and lives on mana." He looked at me seriously. "Few will know what you are when they look at you. Those who do, may realize that your body could be used to make many extremely valuable things, you should avoid showing this form around people you don't trust, until you have the power necessary to defend yourself. Having the mark of the goddess will protect you from anyone faithful to her, but you still make a tempting target. Before you ask, no I don't know why the System gave you this body, it didn't equip me with knowledge of its inner workings. Its algorithms must have determined that this would be helpful somehow."

"So… how do I turn back? Talking like this is tiring, I didn't notice at first." As I sent the message I watched my flowing stripes glow brighter for a moment. Afterwards the glow was very subtly less than before.

"Well you are doing that very inefficiently, using a lot of mana, when you just need a tiny amount to send words. But efficiency is a later problem. To change back, it's like the other things we've done, we are going to rely on using your instincts to help you. Eventually you'll be able to copy them and manage it consciously. Picture the other form, though maybe this time try to think about it having normal eyes, and want it." The last two words spurred my desire to be back to two legs.

I wanted hands again, even if they were not the best. I wanted to get back to trying to learn to live in that form. I spared a moment to think about how the glowing eyes would probably make me a target. I focused on that desire, and it happened. My energy flared from inside me, coating my entire body, it took hold, and changed me. I shrank, and as I grew smaller, my muscles shifted. My fur seemed to burn itself shorter, letting off puffs of multicolored smoke. My bones moved and stretched, taking on more human proportions. The energy felt warm and comforting, I was surprised how nice it felt to shift, like doing so was a part of my calling in my new life.

When the change was complete, I looked in the mirror again, I was crouching on the floor, humanoid, but far from human. My eyes were no longer glowing swirls, but still very conspicuous, they were bright blue with a dark green ring around my thankfully round pupil, yellow specks could be seen throughout.

I stood back up, and almost fell down when I noticed how drained I felt. I also noticed I was starving, I felt like I hadn't eaten in days. I groaned. "Do we have any food? I'm tired and hungry" I panted like a dog as I walked over and sat on the bed. It was easy to do when I didn't think about the movement.

The more time passed after the shift the more exhausted I felt. By the time I sat down I was taking in great gouts of air, and seeing colors in my vision that moved in time with my breaths. I was so hungry I couldn't think.

The colors started flowing toward me moving faster as I breathed. When the world around me was bright, and filled with motes of many different colors, I started feeling better. I realized I was reaching out and pulling the energy in the area into myself. It was bright around me because I'd urged it to congregate near me. "It must be mana, I must have triggered mana sense, and mana manipulation, or is that mana call?" I remembered my character sheet. "I think I am eating it? I think that's what manavore means." There were a lot of sensations flooding me at once, as the mana flowed to me, it would take time to mentally unpack them all.

After watching me for a bit the little dragon spoke up. "Yes, as you can see we have all the food a manavore could need here. Before you ask, yes you can and should also eat like a normal person. Your body can live entirely off mana, but it takes quite a lot of it to maintain you, and there's unlikely to be enough in the area you'll be placed to start out your new life."

"Ah, that makes sense, it would be pretty weird to have sharp teeth and claws on something that lives off of sunshine and air." My tail flicked lightly. I willed myself to stop seeing the glowing sea of mana I was sitting in, and thankfully I got that right on the first try. I realized after a moment I could still feel it, and a part of my mind was still gathering it to me. It was really nice, I didn't know how to interpret what I was feeling. I could tell the different colors were all different types, and they all, for the lack of a better word, tasted different. Every bit of mana that came to me felt lovely though, and the "tastes'' didn't mix or conflict with each other as I consumed. I sank into the feeling of the mana flowing into me for a while.

After what was probably a half an hour of sitting and basking in the mana, purring my head off, I noticed that while I felt better, I still felt hungry. "So is there food here? Because you're right, this isn't really filling me up."

"Of course the System left a way to feed you, training is estimated to take some time!" He gazed into space. Moments later a comically huge turkey leg was floating in front of me. I grabbed it and started eating, no need to question what the magical ai and the little assistant could do right now. "Make sure to eat the bone too, your body really just needs organic matter."

I followed his instructions, easily biting through the thick bone of what was probably a terror bird or something judging from the size. Once I polished it off, I licked my hands thoroughly clean, and started similarly cleaning the fur on my arms. The act felt so incredibly natural I didn't realize what I was doing for a couple minutes, after which I stopped. I decided not to think too hard about that. An impulse for feline grooming habits was pretty harmless as far as the instincts I found myself saddled with went.

I decided to ask something my brain had latched on to. "Organic matter? Doesn't that mean I could eat wood, or grass?" Something inside me strongly rejected the idea the moment the words left my mouth. I felt sick at the thought, like I previously would have at the thought of eating raw meat. When my mind went to that, the idea of raw meat made me drool, even as stuffed as I was.

"Technically yes, but I think you figured out why you won't. Remember how I said Mana Beasts were made from the concept of an animal? It is rather evident that your form embodies something like 'large cat' you'll be wanting meat." He nodded at me. "If you were a mana beast that looked like a bull, you'd be disgusted by the idea of eating meat."

I frowned as I thought about the way this body messed with my mind, it was upsetting. I clenched my hands into fists. I had to look at this another way or this life would be torture. I closed my eyes and convinced myself that even if my new chance at life came with some hurdles, it was nothing compared to the way I spent the end of my previous life. I was healthy and strong, and very much alive. That beat lying in a hospital bed, unable to so much as lift my own head. It was worth it, any change that it imposed on me was still better than what I had before, and anything was better than death. My tail slowly swung back and forth at those thoughts.

I took a deep breath, opened my eyes, and decided to return to my attempt to complete the arduous task that had thwarted me before, getting dressed.