The alignment was off. He took a wrench and shifted it a few degrees. There, that was more like it. Next, he would need to recalibrate the power coupling.

"Sir, your breakfast is ready."

He pressed on the jack, lifting the budding teleportation pad. Laying back on an undercar roller, he wheeled underneath it. Removing the panel he started adjusting the necessary wires.

"Sir"

He experimentally connected two exposed ends and checked his voltage meter, ensuring nothing was amiss. It was close but not exactly what he intended. He replaced the connection entirely. Precision was key, there would be no wiggle room allowed.

"I said your breakfast is ready."

Minion's voice repeated itself and he poked his head out from under.

"I know, I've just been busy." He gestured to the pad. "We need to get this teleporter up and running and start conducting tests."

Minion stood with his hands on his hips, a look of disapproval on his face.

"You missed dinner and your midnight snack."

Irrelevant, there had been too much to do.

"I've clearly been busy Minion." He snapped back, harder than intended, and rather than correct his behavior, rolled back underneath. "This teleporter won't fix itself."

"It's bothering you isn't it?"

Megamind ignored his blabbering and focused on the task at hand. Metrocity was waiting for him. Metro Man was waiting for him. He couldn't leave his true foe waiting. He was needed there. Not here.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He rolled out again, addressing his pushy Minion.

"Talk? Talk about what? There's nothing to talk about. Now if you excuse me, some of us are trying to help us get home."

Minion had little idea of how complex a task this was.

"Okay sir, that's fine. If you don't mind, I'll just speak out loud to myself then. It helps me keep track of things."

Megamind didn't see why he needed permission for that. If Minion wanted to fill the air with meaningless babble that was fine, he just wouldn't listen to it.

"I know we don't work with the police or the heroes in general but I thought, in this particular case, it might be the move to make. It didn't work out, the girls are very opposed to the idea. They're illegals and are worried about being sent back to their own country."

At least they had an option of returning home. Megamind's was a work in progress.

"I've sent them out of the lair as requested, they're in Harry's place right now. That's not a permanent solution though. They're not comfortable around him."

Understandable, given what that animal had done. And he was just that. Not a wannabe villain. Not a thug. An animal. A mindless beast preying on others.

"We set them up with air mattresses for now but we need to come up with something else if they're going to stick around."

They weren't his responsibility. He wasn't some dashing hero who came to save the girl. He was a villain. He kidnapped the girl, held her for ransom, threatened her life, and then returned her once his plan was foiled.

It was a symbiotic relationship. He got to terrify the city and put Metro Man right where he wanted while she had the inside scoop on the greatest supervillain of all time.

"We need your help."

"Why do you care Minion!" He snapped again. "Need I remind you what we are? We don't help people."

"I know that sir, but we sorta kidnapped them…" Minion scratched his head container while having a perplexed expression. "I can't help but feel that means we're a little responsible."

"Don't forget, this isn't our city. We're tourists."

Something like this would have never occurred in Metrocity. Metro Man wouldn't allow it to happen. No, Megamind wouldn't stand for it either. It was his city. They had rules. Lines you didn't cross.

"If you say so. In other news, I know you're focused but do you think you can get a Holo watch working for me? Harry's been a great help but he's not very good at getting groceries. The last carton of eggs he brought me had a bad one in it. It's a good thing I caught it before making the mix. Otherwise, the entire batch would have been lost."

A rotten egg?

"Are you still paying attention sir? It's hard to make sure your nutritional needs are being met if I can't visit the store myself."

Right, that happens sometimes when cooking. Not that he knew much about the subject. What did you do when you found one? You tossed it, got rid of it, eliminated it. The rest were fine, the cake could still be baked.

"Sometimes they're out of things as well and some of Harry's substitutions, while creative, are not something I'm willing to try."

Its mere presence was unacceptable. It had to be removed.

This Broken Bay, it wasn't his city. However, he had standards.

Megamind was a bad guy. He was the best bad guy. He took pride in it. Yet, others clearly didn't. Lung was poisoning the well for villains everywhere.

The teleporter could wait. He got up, took the plate of food, and started shoveling down its contents. He needed the energy.

Minion's mouth moved but he paid it no mind. There was a rotten egg and he knew just what to do.

—

His original plan had to be scrapped. It was a sad thing, to see that work be put down the drain. He consoled himself with the fact that not all was lost. The tools he made and the lessons learned would persist with him.

The plan itself was also still a good one. They could repurpose it for another target. It wouldn't be as special but it would be a waste to let it go. That Empire might make a good one. They were supposed to be quite a big deal. It would be more difficult to manage with so many characters to keep track of. A challenge he was more than willing to rise to.

That would come after, he had more immediate concerns now.

"Is this backdrop okay?" The view of the bay, sans that hero headquarters was behind him. He clicked the next button on the remote and the image was replaced. Rows of hollowed-out buildings rife with decay stretched out behind him. "How about this one?

"Too apocalyptic."

Hmm, valid observation. He cycled through the options, judging each one.

A classroom? He was certainly giving a lesson but not of that type.

A stormy backdrop? It conveyed the right emotions, he was a storm. However, it was too animated and distracted from his presence.

The lair, dressed up with a reasonable amount of tesla coils? Again, not what he was going for.

The next option befuddled him.

"What is this, I don't remember this one."

It was some underwater video. If it was of some deep trench with terrifying sea monsters slithering about that would make sense however it seemed to be two brightly colored fish. Was this some territorial dispute? They seemed to be getting physical.

He was bowled over by Minion who yanked the remote from his hands and shut down the projector.

"Mi-Minion! What's gotten into you?"

"Sorry! There was a bug, yes a bug. It was about to sting you. I had to stop it, my job is to take care of you."

"Well, yes but you could have simply warned me!"

He criticized while Minion helped him up.

"There was no time, it was really big. I couldn't let you come into harm's way."

"Thank you, I suppose." They'd never paid too much attention to pest infestations, letting the spiders do their work. He found the cobwebs they left added to the lair's lairness. "Should I create something to deal with them?"

"I'm not sure that's necessary. Anyways, maybe the backdrops have been too much? Less is more sometimes. That's what you've said right, sir?"

He stroked his goatee in contemplation.

"You're saying something as simple as emerging from the smoke. Maybe have some haunting but ambiguous shapes mixed in. Let them second guess whether or not their eyes are playing tricks on them. Yes, we'll do that. Give me a moment to code it."

It was an easy enough assignment with the software he had already developed. The mini studio section in the lair had been developed with another purpose in mind. They were meant to stage Lung rampages here and leak them to the internet. To add an air of realism, they'd go and replicate the damage in actual parts of the city.

In another world, they might still have done that. It didn't sit right with him now. Every day Lung was free was another the name of villainy was dragged through the mud.

He uploaded the digital landscape he'd created and flicked on the projector. It came to life and an eerie, evershifting smoke cloud came to life in the lair.

"Minion." He stood up, holding his hands out. "Nothing's out of place right?"

Minion paced around him twice before giving him a thumbs up.

"Everything is in order. Do you want the teleprompter or will you ablib?"

"Let's see what comes to mind first. If we don't like it we can always reshoot."

Having prepared lines was not a bad thing but he wanted this to feel more personal.

Pacing to the center, he organized his myriad of thoughts. Cameras were honed in on him from multiple directions, all angles covered. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Spider Bot regard him curiously. The individual mites shared that behavior, he'd warned them all to stay out of the shot.

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

"Okay. Ready?" At Minion's voice, he gave a nod. "Alright, this is take one ultimate ultimatum." Minion held up a hand with fingers outstretched. "In three, two,"

"Wait are we starting on one, zero, or go?"

"One"

"Citizens of-"

"Zero"

"Wait I thought you meant- I mean citizens of"

"Go!"

"Minion! How can I, oh never mind." They'd fix it in post. He stared down the center camera. "Citizens of Broken Bay." He stood straight and rather than bellow, he spoke softly. He wanted them to lean in to hear him. "The more fortunate of you, know who I am. For those who have yet to be graced with that knowledge, be prepared, be awed, for now, you have the distinct privilege of knowing that what you witness before you is the pinnacle of villainy the likes this world has ever seen." He waited for a moment before leaning forward with his hands folded behind him, almost whispering. "I am Megamind!"

He pulled back abruptly, changing the tone.

"I know, this is very gauche, isn't it?" He waved, the projected smoke wafting in response to his movement. "I didn't want it to be this way. There was something far grander in mind. I've always been a villain of action, not of words. I'm sure you're asking yourselves then, why? Why did I settle for a banal video to deliver my message?" He shook his head and turned to one of the lower-positioned cameras. "It's because something came to my attention recently. Something I can't allow to continue. There's someone in this city that doesn't belong. Someone who dares call themselves a villain. That's right!" He pointed at another camera and whipped his head towards it. "I'm calling you out Lung. I've been sending you a message for a while now, maybe you've gotten it, maybe you haven't. Well, it doesn't matter. You're no longer welcome in this city. I'll give you two options. The first is to pack up and leave. The second." He gave conspiratorial chuckle number 2. "I'll leave that to your imagination."

He walked back while waggling his fingers and disappeared into the fake smoke.

"How was that?" He asked after waiting an appropriate moment. "It felt like I nailed it but you never quite know how an audience will take it."

"Perfect sir, just perfect. We'll need to compile the footage but I'm not sure we'll even need another take."

"Better to have more options. We'll run through it a few more times. There's a couple of more variations I want to try."

"Sounds like a plan." Minion's voice hesitated for a moment before continuing. "Do you mind if I do the editing this time? I know you're really busy."

It would take a little off his plate and while editing was important, he didn't see how Minion could mess it up with the quality of material he supplied.

"I'll allow it. It just has to be posted before the end of the day."

"Right sir, I'll get to work after we finish shooting."

—

"Wake up! Sir, Wake up!"

He groggily gained awareness as he was swayed back and forth.

"Huh? What's going on?"

He was dropped on the sofa, having been carried from his bed by Minion.

"It's on the news, look!" Minion pointed to the television.

The screen displayed a stern-faced woman in a studio.

"We're receiving unconfirmed reports of an altercation on Seventh Street. ABB's Lung is allegedly in combat with an unknown third party."

The screen flickered and incomprehensible noises were played by the speakers. That must have been what Minion referred to the other day, the new's transmitter must be poor quality. The sound of thunder rang out. Or a storm was interfering with it.

"Viewers are advised to avoid the area at all costs. If you are in the area and are unable to evacuate please shelter in place. Authorities have issued-"

He tuned out the rest.

"To the Megamobile! Quick! We don't want anyone to get there before we can."

He sent a dehydration shot to Spider Bot. It caught one of the Mites resting on it and he had to fire a second shot. The Mites were supposed to be on recon searching for Lung so he'd have to give that one a talking to about slacking.

"Minion gather the Spider Bot, I'm going to get my cape."

Megamind didn't wait for a response and retrieved it, clipping it on behind him. He'd had the foresight to sleep in his suit but was worried the cape might wrinkle.

Running back, he made sure he'd collected everything he needed before jumping in the heavily modified cart.

"Spider Bot?"

Minion held up a cube and Megamind took it, slipping it into one of his utility belt pockets.

Slamming on the pedal, they shot out of the garage and onto the road. It was lucky Sixth Street was relatively close, they'd be able to get there in no time.

Just in case, he pressed the red button and was thrust back in his seat as the Megamobile lurched forward.

His reaction speed was the only thing that kept the few lampposts left from joining their brethren in the trash heap.

Flashes appeared in the distance and he steered towards them. Sounds of gunfire followed.

"We're coming up." He spoke to his passenger. "Be ready."

Lung had already started his transformation, being over ten feet tall and growing. He was wrestling with an odd creature. It was the size of a motorcycle with exposed muscles and bony protrusions. The creature was thrown aside and another took its place. Lung held it at bay with a clawed hand, coated it with flames, and flung it towards the other.

Megamind didn't stop, ramming his vehicle into the scaled man. It worked well until the cape dug his feet in and the Megamobile began to rise.

Through the windshield, glowing orange eyes glared at him.

"Ollo" Megamind released the wheel. One hand waving with the other sticking out the window with his gun set on Destroy. The beam lashed out as they were tossed.

It rolled once before coming to a stop.

"I don't think he liked that" Minion observed while unbuckling himself. "I'll handle the gang members while you go for Lung?"

Had there been others there? He hadn't noticed.

"Sounds like a plan. I'm not to be interrupted unless absolutely necessary."

Megamind crawled out and brushed himself off, seeing Lung attacking one of the creatures again. Minion had been correct, there were others here. There was a girl clutching her shoulder and riding one of the bigger of the monstrosities. She was attacking some of the people now shooting at him. As long as she stayed out of the way she could do as she liked.

Lung's head turned in his direction. Megamind stuck a palm out, beckoning him forward.

"How much longer do you plan on keeping me waiting? Or are you reconsidering my offer to leave the city? I'm afraid that offers expired."

Lung gave a snarl and a wave of flame was launched. Megamind swung his cape forward and ducked underneath. After the snafu at the bank, he'd made it fireproof.

Feeling the heat abate, he poked his head out to see Lung had gained another foot and for that matter…was rapidly gaining on him.

"Is that all? I've had easy bake ovens produce greater heat!"

Destroy hit center mass, staggering him. He kept the trigger down, prolonging the attack before the critical mass of energy erupted on the cape. His body was ragdolled down the street.

He didn't relent, firing on the pulsing body of flesh that was on the ground. Fire erupted from Lung, blocking his sight. When it cleared he could see the asphalt had melted.

Lung had risen, somehow even taller. A slight frown came to him, he was more resilient than he expected.

"Think you're clever? You're not the first. You all burn the same."

"Oh, I burn alright. With the flames of evil!"

He fired again and his target ducked out of the way. Lung was beginning to cross the distance when one of the lizard creatures, now the size of the Megamobile, made an attempt to tackle him.

"Excuse you." He yelled towards the rider of the other beast. "Can you call it off? I'm trying to have a villainous showdown over here."

Her response was a whistle and some words were drowned out by gunfire. He wondered what she meant when he heard an impact behind him.

The lizard creature not attacking Lung had tried to ambush him from behind but had been knocked aside by Minion's extendable arm.

"I'll take care of it!" Minion jumped towards it and the two became entangled.

The lights of a van came rolling down the street, it skidded to a halt near the remaining ABB thugs and its occupants piled out.

"Doesn't matter how many of you come." Lung gruffed before sending another burst of fire.

He ducked back behind his cape again.

Was Lung's growth rate accelerating? It looked like it might.

From the ground vibrating, he knew to roll to the side and avoid a charge. Lung's transformation must have messed with his orientation because the cape tripped and hit the pavement.

Megamind recovered from his roll and launched more strikes but they were becoming increasingly ineffective. He considered whether to switch to Death Ray.

"Bitch! Call Angelica off, we're on the same side!" A girl in black and purple spandex shouted. That was a rather harsh way to talk to a supposed ally. She turned to him next.

"Megamind right? We're villains, like you. And yes, I mean it like that. We follow the rules. That guy over there." She pointed to Lung who was fighting off one of the lizards. "He doesn't. Point blank, unredeemable. I know you want to make a show about it but he doesn't deserve it. Take him out, shut him down, however you want to call it."

"And who are you to interrupt me?" He asked the no-name with a raised eyebrow while watching Lung and one of the creatures battle in a test of raw strength.

"Tattletale, I'm with the Undersiders. Look I get you have this whole thing about appearances but we really don't have time for this. I can read minds okay? So I know that you know that this is all an excuse for you to blow off some frustration. But seriously, this whole idea of fighting him at his best? It's stupid, you're going to get yourself… you're going to get your friend killed."

A mind reader?!?!? Impossible, no one could comprehend his his thoughts.

"Prove it." He demanded while keeping his eye on Lung who was now grappling with all three of the creatures.

A motorcyclist billowing with dark smoke approached Tattletale, grabbing her by the shoulder.

"We need to go. Bitch! Call them off."

"Excuse you." Megamind said disapprovingly. "That's no way to talk to each other."

"He's right" Minion added his own thoughts. "It's very rude of you."

"That's her name. Grue, back off. Let me handle this." She shrugged Grue's hand off. "Lung doesn't stop growing. You can end this now. Or do you want the heroes to get involved? Oni Lee can't hold them off forever."

So that's where Oni Lee was. A shame, he'd been hoping to get both of them.

A roar sounded, shaking him from his thoughts. Lung had grown quite a bit, but if what the girl said was right, there was more to be had.

He wanted to see it. He wanted to beat it.

Remembering her words, his mind drifted elsewhere. Did it actually matter? Would it change anything?

A whistle sounded and the creatures disengaged, running back to their master who seemed to be struggling to stand. Free of distractions, Lung gave an intelligible cry and began to barrel towards him.

He was treating the symptom, not the disease.

Death Ray selected, he fired. Lung's arm disappeared, and the man fell to the side. His remaining arm thrust out and a blue-yellow flame shot towards him.

Minion acted, jumping in front and absorbing the hit with his shield. The remnants spilled over the shield and the sweltering heat made it difficult to breathe.

Aiming again, he shot another round and the second arm disappeared.

The flames didn't abate, increasing in heat. He lined up another shot. His finger hesitated. The gun was hot. It was too hot. He realized the implications and swiftly lowered it to a lower power setting. If he shot another Death Ray it was liable to explode.

Lung's next advance was halted in its tracks as a dehydrate hit its mark. The brute was reduced to a small glowing cube. Not the most cinematic of endings but his mood had soured.

"Seriously?" One of the ones who arrived in the van spoke, a teenager dressed in a frilly costume. "That easy? You could have done that the entire time? Dude I left a ranked match for this!"

"Easy? Do you have any idea how much math went into creating this gun? I'll-"

Tattletale interuppted him.

"We all need to get out of here. Heroes will be here soon. We should, no we will talk later. Kay? kay."

Without waiting for his response, they mounted the strange creatures while bickering with each other and left swiftly.

"Children these days. Who raised them?"

"They certainly weren't raised in a correctional facility, they'd be better behaved if so."

Megamind found himself agreeing, the inmates had done a proper job instilling values into him.

The sky rumbled, gaining his attention.

"Minion, you wouldn't happen to remember the weather forecast would you?"

"If I remember right, that's a 70% percent chance of rain tonight."

"Ah, I was worried for a….wait. 70%! Quick, grab the cube before…"

He felt a drop on his scalp and then another. The cube glowed before expanding back into an enraged Lung.

Not a problem, that's why he had Spider Bot. He grabbed the cube from its place and tossed it at his feet. It would rehydrated and the two of them would find themselves safely in the cab, able to rain destruction with impunity.

The glow was smaller than it should have been and a Spider Mite appeared, looking at him curiously.

"Minion."

"I know sir."

Lung shook off the disorientation associated with rehydration and locked onto them.

"We might want to make ourselves scarce." He stated while taking a step back.

"Uh, where did we leave the Megamobile?"

Megamind scanned the surroundings, finding it missing. The cloak must have engaged at one point.

"Run!" He scooped up the Mite who had clacked its mandibles angrily at lung and Minion rushed forward, intercepting the claw but being pushed back.

The Spider Mite's dehydration gun fired, buying them a second.

"Find the car!" He set his gun to decoy and began making projections of himself. "Quickly!"

Lung returned with a roar of frustration and fire rolled out in every direction, eliminating many of the stationary projections.

"Minion!" He ducked under a grab and Lung was reduced to a cube again "Hurry!"

The distance he gained didn't seem to matter as Lung jumped the entire thing. His Megalight flashed but, if the way the eyes stayed on him was any indication, had no effect.

Fortunately, his highly tuned instincts prevented him from being skewered immediately. From cube to dragon to cube, the cycle repeated itself while the crazy cape chased him through the street.

The sounds of another vehicle were heard and something struck Lung, staggering him.

"I found it sir!"

He raced towards Minion, rolling under a column of flames. He checked his gun, it was good for one last shot. He fired a Death Ray. Lung fell forward, missing a leg.

Megamind jumped into the passenger seat, Minion having taken the wheel.

"Drive, drive!" He yelled and the tires screeched.

He'd done all the heavy lifting. The heroes could stand to do their jobs for once.

Not that he set out to do their work for them, he was simply ensuring certain standards were being met.

He thought in quiet reflection. All he had done was vent his emotions. He knew it wouldn't change anything. The girl could claim what she wanted but he doubted they were like him. They were like that Bakuda woman, flailing in the dark with no direction. If he hadn't been raised by the inmates would he have been that way? No, he was confident being bad was his DNA. He would have figured it out. However, it wouldn't come intuitively to all.

"It's not enough." He mumbled and Minion turned to him.

"You want me to go faster, sir?"

"No, not that." Their current speed was fine. "I meant it's not enough to show them villainy."

His eyes met his own in the rearview mirror.

"We have to teach them."