Vivian
October, 30, 2007. 7:12 a.m. Chicago hotel room bathroom. Everyone else is snuggled up in their beds, but still awake. At least I hope they’re awake. If they’re sleep talking, I might need to sleep outside… Been talking on the phone with Suzy for at least twenty minutes. There’s… a lot and none of it’s good.
“Did you get all that?” Suzy chimes in.
“Yeah. I got it all written down too.” I review the notebook.
“Good good. You guys are in Chicago already? Dang, you guys got there fast. How’d you manage that?”
“A.D. drove yesterday. He refused to be in the car with Will for another day.”
“What’s wrong?” Suzy asks. “Did they get into a fight or something?”
“Nah. Nothing like that.” I lie down and look up at the pale ceiling. “Will just farts a lot after eating fast food, and it smells horrible.”
Suzy erupts with laughter. “Oh yeah. That’ll do it. What’s it smell like?”
“Imagine if Satan dragged his asshole through a barn.”
“Such language.” Suzy continues her laughter. “Well, I’m just glad you kids got there safely.”
“Me too. I’m going to debrief the teams now. Take care.”
“Good night, Vivian. Wait. One more thing.”
“Yes?”
“Be careful, okay? If the mission becomes too much, it’s okay to run. It’s okay to abort it. I’d rather have a failed mission than dead students.”
“... Got it. Thank you for your concern, Suzy.”
“Anytime, Vivian. Go kick some ass.”
She hangs up and I leave the bathroom.
I see A.D., Yuko, and Josh ductapping Angela to the wall while Will, Janelle, and Sejong are enjoying a game of dominos.
“Do I even want to ask?”
Angela turns to me and smiles. “It’s better that you don’t.”
“Dearly noted.” I clap and open the notebook. “Okay, so. Attention everyone. I got bad news and worse news. What do you want to hear first?”
“Bad.” Everyone agrees.
“Alright. The bad news is the Chicago P.D. has been allegedly compromised by the villain league. We are instructed to not contact them for help or warn people about the threat to avoid arousing suspicion.”
“What?” Will nearly spits out his whiskey and wipes his lip. “Are we just supposed to not evacuate them at all?”
“And start a public panic and risk them setting the bomb off sooner?”
Will sighs and shrugs. “Fair enough… No real winning here is there?”
“We win by neutralizing the bomb threat… whatever that may be.”
“Do we have any clue what that method is?” Janelle asks.
“Ohoho. That’s the worse news. We have no idea what they’re going to use to blow up the city. We don’t know if they have nuclear material, or if they’re air bombing with some alien weaponry, or if they’re using one Tech or a combination of Techs.”
“Cameron couldn’t find anything?” Sejong asks.
“That’s the even worse news. He found evidence suggesting all three of those.”
Everyone disliked that.
“So… yeah… we don’t know if they’re using one or every method of ctrl-x’ing Chicago from the map.”
“Is there any good news?” Yuko reaches for her whiskey flask and takes a big swig.
“You wanna take it easy on that?” Will asks.
“You wanna suck my ass?”
Will looks at me and tilts his head towards Yuko.
I mouth “I know,” before continuing the conversation. “Yeah.”
bzzt bzzt
My phone’s ringing again. It’s from Suzy. I answer. “Hello…?”
“Vivian. Put me on speaker. Now.”
“Done.”
Suzy sighs for ten seconds straight before saying anything. “Cameron got new info.”
“Good info?” A.D. asks.
“No. So the United States government tried to privately negotiate with the Elite. Thought they could squeeze some extra money by using public order and peace as a bargaining chip.”
“How’d it go?” I ask.
A faint click could be heard on the other end of the line. Explosions, cries, gunfire, and swears of all languages could be heard. The cries stopped at another faint click. “Coulda gone better. Better hurry. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Elite retaliates for this. Best of luck. I’ll dispatch the Alumni as soon as I can.” Suzy hangs up.
“Wait… the Alumni?” A.D. asks with pleading eyes. “Does that mean we get to meet Meteorman?”
“Probably.” I nod. “Headmaster also says there’s no shame in aborting the mission. If things get too risky, she says we can go home without penalty.”
Everyone looks at each other in silence. Except for Angela and Yuko. Angela continues lying face down while Yuko pumps her fist a little and grins wide.
“I’m not running.” Janelle stands up and locks gazes with me. “I’m not letting innocent people suffer.”
Will looks up at her, smiles, and stands beside her. “Neither am I. I came here to help people.”
A.D. joins in and punches the air. “Heroes never run.”
Sejong looks at everyone standing up, pauses, then sighs. “I’ve come this far. I’m not going to back out now…” Sejong stands up and clenches his thigh. His arm’s going nuts.
Everyone; including me, looks at Josh and Yuko. They look at each other then look at us.
“Look,” Josh sucks on the end of his cig. “I’ll do everything I can to help, but if things go tits up, I’m leaving. This city’s not worth my life.”
“Ditto.” Angela raises her hand without looking up. “Stay close to me, Josh. I got you in case things go bad.”
“Thank you, Angie.”
“What about you, Yuko?” I ask.
“I’m with Josh and Angela. Things go south, you and I are booking it immediately.” she takes another sip. “Got it?”
I nod at Yuko.
A.D., Will, and Janelle glare at them.
“Then why did you three even come here?” Will asks.
“I never said we weren’t going to help,” Josh approaches Will. “Just that we’re pulling out the second things turn bad.”
“And just let innocent people die?” Will looks Josh in the eye.
“You can’t be a hero if you’re dead, jackass.” Yuko licks whiskey off her lips.
“I got too much to live for.” Josh’s forehead is mere inches from Will’s. “Sorry if that upsets you.”
“Real heroes stay when things start going south.” Will continues. “And I intend to help as many people and do as much good as I can, right up until the end.”
“Cut it out with the messiah complex.” Josh keeps his eyes locked on Will. “You’re not the J man. If you die, you’re not coming back.”
Without missing a beat, Will responds. “If I die saving others, I can die happily.”
“Are your parents okay with that?” Josh points to Janelle. “Is Janelle okay with that?”
“Hey.” Janelle’s arm lights aflame. “I’m the pryokinetic. I have the best shot out of any of us stopping an explosion.”
“Wouldn’t absorbing a city-wide explosion cause you to explode?” Yuko asks.
“Possibly.” Janelle shrugs. “but I’m okay with that.” her voice begins to trail off. “It’d be the only useful thing I’ve ever done.”
Everyone’s eyes turn to A.D. Except Sejong. Sejong just stares at the floor silently.
“Everyone, everyone. Chill. Don’t worry about me.” A.D. smiles and bumps his chest. “I know I can perfect parry any explosion that comes my way.”
Somehow, that confidence does not encourage me.
“What about you, Viv?” Yuko turns to me. “You gonna try to be some hero or are you going to book it with us?”
I look at Yuko, then at the rest of my team. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. “I’m not dying. Let’s just leave it at that for now, kay?”
Yuko smiles and pats my shoulder hard. “Attagirl. I knew you were as smart as you looked.”
“Viv-” Will speaks up, but A.D. puts his hand to Will’s chest.
“William. Janelle. Everyone.” I look everyone in the eye. “How about we just get ready? We don’t know how much time we got.”
Will takes one last look at me before heading towards the restroom. “Agreed… Familia, head back to your room and get ready. Meeting adjourned.”
Yuko
October, 30, 2007. 11:26 a.m. Millenium Park. Beautiful day. Not too hot, not too chilly. Got a nice breeze going. Perfect jacket weather. Not a cloud in the sky.
Holy crap. Why the hell is this park so big? Been walking for like three hours and still haven’t been through everything. Haven’t even seen anything suspicious either. I’m walking through some grassy-ass area with Viv, Angela, and Josh with Viv wrapped around my arm tight. If I wasn’t under the threat of being blown up, I’d be enjoying this more.
“Yo, Angela.” I turn to her. “I get that you’d just escape into your phone, but how would Josh escape if things go tits up?”
“Oh, you didn’t know?” Angela grabs Josh’s hand and smiles. “Check this out.”
“Wait, what?!” Josh flinches, and before he can say anything else, the two of them get digitized and zap themselves into Viv’s phone.
bzzt Viv’s phone crackles. “Waaaazzup.” Angela’s voice chimes from the phone’s speaker. “I’m in here with my boy.”
“Get me out! Get me out!” Josh yells and makes the phone shake in Viv’s hand.
“Aw, c’mon. Quit your whining. I’ll have you out in a jiffy.”
Two seconds later, a bolt of electricity shoots out of Viv’s phone and Angela and Josh reappear in front of us. Angela’s smiling. Josh looks like he just saw his mom getting spitroasted by two santas.
“Don’t. EVER. Do that without warning me!” Josh yells.
“Alright, alright. Sorry, dude. Didn’t think you’d hate it that much.”
“So you can just bring other people into technology with you?” Viv asks.
“Yeup.” Angela nods. “As long as they’re touching me while I go in. I can even bring objects in too.”
“I see…” Viv nods. “Can you leave people inside things?”
“Yes indeedy.”
“Wait.” I interrupt. “If there’s an explosion, won’t the phone we’re in just get destroyed too? What happens then?”
“Ah, don’t worry. I can text us to a phone back in my dorm room in an instant no problem.”
“Wait…” I blink. “You can just teleport?”
“Yeah.” Angela nods. “As long as there’s a working electronic appliance that broadcasts signals, I can transport through it.”
“But what happens if that electronic breaks while you’re in it?”
“I just pop out. No electric current, no room for me. It hurts like a bitch though. Imagine getting shot through a wall. Feels kinda like that.”
“I see…” Viv nods. “We’ll be sure to stay close to you then.”
“Good idea…” Josh takes a deep breath. “Just do yourself a favor and close your eyes when you go in. You might puke your stomach out if you leave them open.”
“Dearly noted.” Viv shoots a thumbs-up.
bzzt bzzt bzzt bzzt My phone rings.
I answer. “Yo, what up?”
Sejong’s voice blares from the other end of the line. She sounds like she’s about to piss her pants. “Yuko, where are you guys right now?”
“Uh… Some park. I can see a big lake to our right. Everything going okay?”
“Yeah. We’re doing good. Thank you for asking by the way. We’re by the Cloud Gate.”
“The what?”
“You know, the famous sculpture by Sir Anish Kapoor?”
“Who?”
“Stainless steel? 2006?”
“You’re gonna have to be a little more specific.”
“The big shiny bean.”
“Oh, that thing. What’re you guys doing there?”
“A.D. insisted on climbing it… luckily he managed to do so before attracting any cops or attention. We haven’t seen anything suspicious.”
“What have you seen?”
“Corgis. Lots and lots of corgis.”
“Wha?” I look around me and finally notice all the corgis in the park. Every other person is walking one of them. There has to be at least thirty of those stubby bastards in my line of sight. “Is that a problem?”
“Well, do you remember the video Cameron showed us? A corgi was part of the league, wasn’t it? I’m not saying the two are related, just that it’s something to watch out for. We don’t know if it’s Tech related, but it seems suspicious, don’t you think?”
“Guess so…” I sigh. “I’ll keep that in mind. Anything else?”
“Nope. We’ll keep you updated though. See ya.” Sejong hangs up.
“What’s going on?” Viv asks.
“Sejong thinks corgis could be the bombs.” I put my phone away and look out at the park.
“What? Why?” Angela looks out in the same direction at me. “Holy crap that’s a lot of corgis.”
“You’re right… I don’t think there’s any corgi club meet up either.” Josh sighs. “Well, if the corgis are the bombs, what do we do? Not like we have any other leads.”
“Got a point there…” Viv rubs her chin. “Might as well check other places. Buildings, secret compartments, the sewers. Maybe there’s something under the lake. Anything sound like it’s worth a shot?”
“Sewers definitely seem like a likely candidate.” Angela nods.
“Alright…” Josh rubs his temple. “Let’s get ready.”
“You guys have fun with that… I’m not getting soaked in piss juice.” I walk away and wave goodbye.
“Yuko!” Viv tries to pull me back to them, but it doesn’t work. I just keep on walking to a nearby hotdog stand. “C’mon! Sewers are bound to have some cool stuff in them!”
“Not worth the piss smell. Don’t care.”
“That’s fair!” Angela waves me goodbye. “If I find a dead body, do you want a pic?”
“No.” I respond. “The hell is wrong with you?”
“I was just asking.” Angela’s voice fades into the distance. “No need to be weird about it.”
Sejong
October, 30, 2007. 11:32 a.m. Millenium Park. Even though a bomb could go off at any minute, the park is still as peaceful as ever. People play and paint without a care in the world, packs of corgis roam free, and a lone red blimp floats above the park like a lost balloon. I’m sitting at a bench eating some $6 ice cream cones with Janelle, Will, and A.D. Worst $6 I ever spent. You’d think for all the price gouging there would be some sparkle pizazz or special flavor. Nope. Just some pedestrian vanilla that’s trying desperately to be soft serve.
“So…” Janelle takes a bite of her cone and looks out at the scenery. “Corgis, huh?”
“Yep. Corgis.” A.D. licks the ice cream off his upper lip. “Never noticed how many there are here… maybe they’re just that popular?”
“Unless the Fae are about to start their uprising, I doubt it.” Janelle responds.
“But what can we do about it if it is the corgis? Are we just supposed to stop and ask everyone to check their corgi? Even if it is the corgis, how do we know which ones are the bombs and which ones are just corgis?”
I get a horrible idea and inhale the rest of my ice cream. “Wait here, guys. I’ll be right back. Gotta go to the bathroom.” I get up, swallow the rest of the ice cream, suffer from some brain freeze, take about forty steps, and reach the public bathroom. Check inside. Empty. Good. Five stalls. Big traufe. Smells like death. Doesn’t matter. Sneak into a stall, morph into a pembroke corgi with long black fur and one bent ear.
I book it out of the restroom and return to the others. It takes about 120 steps now. Blast these stubby, adorable legs. I eventually reach the park bench, sit down in front of Janelle, and wiggle my stubby butt.
“Aaaaw!” Janelle eats the rest of her cone, picks me up, plants me in her lap, and begins petting me. “Oh my goodness… Who are you, little man? Do you have an owner?”
“You could be my mommy.” I grin.
“AAH!” Janelle shoves me off her lap. “Sejong! What the hell?!”
bonk I land flat on my back with my arms up, but I’m okay. Corgi bodies may be stubby, but they’re sturdy. “Sssh!” I wiggle my arms. “Shut up! You’re going to blow my cover!”
A.D. looks like his heart just melted. He picks me up, puts me on his lap, and begins scratching me behind the ear… aw…. yes. That’s the good stuff. “I think I prefer you like this. Why did you turn into a corgi though?”
“If the corgis are related in any way to the corgi we saw in Cameron’s video, chances are I should be able to pose as one of them and get some intel… can you scratch just a little lower?”
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“Here?”
“Yeees….” I have reached Nirvana.
“That does sound like a good plan…” Will nods. “It’s the only lead we have right now. Need us to back you up?”
“Yeah.” I nod. “Could you carry me around? I don’t have a leash and getting caught by any police officers or PETA assholes would be hugely inconvenient.”
“I volunteer.” A.D. hugs me.
“You can keep him.” Janelle shivers.
“Excellent.” Will nods. “Anything else?”
“Yeah. Just walk me around and act like my owners. Let me play with the other corgis.”
“Sounds good.” A.D. stands up and begins walking over to a couple watching their corgi puppy frolic under a tree. “Hey! Oh my goodness. Your corgi’s so cute. What’s their name?”
“Zoey.” The dude smiles. “Wanna have our dogs play with each other?”
“Sure.” A.D. puts me down and begins talking to the couple. Attaboy. Go be a distraction.
I waddle over to the corgi and strike up a conversation. “So… is everything going according to plan?”
The corgi turns to me, tilts his head, and begins sniffing me.
“I can assure you.” I continue. “I am doing everything in my pow-”
Before I could react, Zoey walks around me and licks my butthole. I… I don’t like that…. Time to retreat. This one is obviously a normal corgi. Feeling different, I waddle away and begin fraternizing with other corgis in the park around me.
“Sir!” the couple calls out. “Your corgi’s fleeing.”
“Ah, don’t worry about him.” A.D. shakes his head. “He’s well-behaved. Trained him off leash. He’ll be fine. Anyway, tell me more about Zoey.”
C’mon… c’mon… one of these corgis has to be related to the mission. Nope. Nope. Real corgi. Real corgi. Another real corgi. Another licked butthole. Huh. All these corgis are real I guess… Time to retreat back to A.D.
On my way back, a somewhat older looking corgi bumps into me. His fur is grey. The tips of his ears have bald patches. His eyes have become murky from cataracts. His legs shake ever so slightly, but his stance is as hardy as ever. “Hey.” he speaks to me. “Are you one of us?”
“Of course.” I nod without skipping a beat. “So glad I finally found you. You would not believe how long it took me to find another associate.”
“Heh…” a pained wheeze of a laugh escapes his snout. “Tell me about it… though I envy the ignorant corgis… They have no idea what’s about to go down.”
“About to?” My voice nearly cracks. “Isn’t the plan tomorrow?”
“Yeah. It was. There’s been a change of plans. The government tried to play coy and take out the top brass… Managed to get a few good hits in, but we’re retaliating hard today. I’ve been informing the rest of the associates this whole morning about the scheduling change. If you run into any others, please inform them. I don’t want good corgis to go to waste.”
“I-I see. Thank you, sir. What about the detonation time? Have our mission instructions changed at all?”
“The detonation time has been changed to high noon. The mission instructions are to just keep acting like a decoy for Lucky. She’s the corgi with the black and white fur, long tail, and floppy ears.”
“Understood. Thank you, sir. What about after the detonation? What’s the plan then?”
“Just jump into what remains of the lake. Echoloria will swim you back to a base from there.”
“Will do. Thank you, sir.”
“You’re welcome. Glory to Corgkind.”
“Glory to Corgkind.” I repeat.
The corgi nods then waddles away from me.
crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap
I sprint back to A.D. as fast as these stupid legs will carry me. “Bark bark bark!”
“Huh?” A.D. looks down at me as I collide head-first with his shin. “What’s wrong?”
I keep barking and throw my front paws up onto his leg.
“I think he wants to go.” the dude chuckles.
“I see.” A.D. bends down and picks me up. “It was nice talking to you two. See you.”
“See you.”
A.D. cradles me in his arms and starts carrying me back to the bench where Janelle’s been sucking on Will’s neck. “So, did you find out anything?”
“THE PLAN GOT CHANGED. THE PARK’S GETTING BLOWN UP IN TWENTY MINUTES.”
A.D. begins screaming and sprinting back to Will and Janelle. “AAAAAAAAAH.”
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.”
Janelle pulls away from Will’s neck as A.D. approaches. “Ssh! Why are you yelling? Calm down.”
“PARK’S BLOWING UP IN TWENTY MINUTES!” A.D. whispers to Janelle and Will.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.” Janelle joins in on our yelling chorus.
“WHAT DO WE DO THEN?” Will asks.
“Find a corgi named Lucky and kill them!” I whisper-yell. “AND CALL TEAM LOVERS!”
Vivian
October, 30, 2007. 11:41 a.m. By the lake with Yuko, Josh, and Angela. Josh and Angela just got back from their sewer excursion. Couldn’t find anything. It’s so… nice just looking out at the lake. It’s not quite as majestic and lethal as the ocean, but still just as peaceful.
bzzzt bzzzt Huh. Wonder who’s calling.
“Yello?”
“Hey… uh… Viv…” Will’s voice rings from the other end of the line.
“Yeah? What’s up?”
“So… don’t freak out, but Sejong just found out that the bomb is a monochromatic corgi with a long tail and floppy ears named Lucky.”
“Why would I freak out about that? That’s great news. We narrowed down the identity of the bomb.”
“It’s set to blow in twenty minutes. Good luck.” Will hangs up.
I feel my soul vacate through my ass.
“Something up, Viv?” Yuko looks at me and rubs my shoulder.
The blimp above the park begins to sizzle and change color like a broken monitor. A loud WWWHHHRRRR booms through the park for a moment before the picture on the blimp settles. A badly beaten up magical girl shows up on the blimp. She’s got thick, wet mascara running down her bruised face, a short black and purple skirt, and a t-shirt so edgy it’d make Shadow the Hedgehog cringe. She’s also covered in a whole mess of bloody bandages, a huge eyepatch, and one of her arms in a sling.
“I’d like to make an announcement.” She wipes her face and clears her throat. “We tried to play nice. We tried to be civil. We just wanted $5,000,000,000,000 and Puerto Rico, but noooooo the feds just had to kill my husband and take my kids. If ya’ll aren’t going to play nice, then neither am I. You deep-dish eating, Cub-worshipping bastards have 20 minutes before this city blows up and my mercenaries hunt all of you down. I hope you all die virgins and rot in hell. Peace. I’M OUT.” The feed cuts off and the blimp begins speeding away.
Everyone in the park starts flipping out and booking it out of there as fast as they can.
“Yeah. That.” I put my phone away. “Find a monochrome corgi with a long tail named Lucky by then.”
Yuko’s jaw hits the ground.
“Angie. Angie.” Josh shakes her shoulder. “Get us out of here!”
“Right! I’ll be back for you two!” Angela grabs Josh’s butt, zaps them into my phone, and sends a text message to her phone back at Aegis.
“Wait!” Yuko grabs my phone and yells into it. “Take me too, you bastards! Don’t just leave us here!”
My entire body begins shaking, but it’s a controlled shake. “Yuko. Hold onto my phone and try to keep up with me.” I sprint off back into the park and begin looking for any and all corgis I can find.
“What?!” Yuko yells as she shoves aside several pedestrians. “Viv! Wait up! What the hell are you doing?!”
“Being a hero.”
11:47 a.m.
Sprinted all throughout the park. No signs of a corgi with a tail. Somehow, I manage to keep sprinting. Even though my chest hurts, even though my legs are strained, I feel more than capable of pressing on.
“Viv! VIV!” Yuko keeps yelling at me. “Angela’s back! Get in the phone right now! We’re leaving!”
“Give me ten more minutes! I can do it! I got a stop sign with Lucky’s name written on it!”
“Damnit, Viv! Quit trying to be a hero!” I can hear Yuko’s voice growing closer.
11:53 a.m.
Crossed under some kind of arch and now I can see the bean statue. Still no tailed corgi in sight. C’mon, you little bastard. You gotta be here somewhere. I turn my head around and around, and finally manage to see a little black furball lazily prancing by Cloud Gate. Fat butt, stubby legs, long tail. Black coat. That has to be it!
Just as I’m about to sprint off after Lucky, I hear a horrible yell behind me. It’s causing my very spine to shake. I cover my ears and look behind me, only to see Yuko flying at me at a dangerous velocity. She grabs me, lands on me, and sends me skidding across the ground with my body gripped viciously between her thighs.
“Listen! VIV!” She grabs me by my shirt and shakes me. “Angela’s in the phone! YOU’RE COMING BACK WITH ME RIGHT NOW!” Her words suggest she’s trying to save me, but her face says she’s going to kill me.
“YUKO! I APPRECIATE YOUR CONCERN, BUT THE DOG’S RIGHT THERE!” I yell back and point to Lucky.
“WHAT?!” She lets go of me and looks at the corgi.
The corgi turns to us then begins sprinting away back into the park.
“Listen… Yuko.” I pinch her cheeks between my fingers. “We’re going to stop that corgi together… and it’s not going to be the last thing we do… Got it?”
A nice shadow begins to cover the park. Clouds must be setting in.
Yuko gets off me, grabs my hand, pulls me up, and pulls me close to her. “Listen up, Angie. The second I say ‘NOW’, you better pull us in, got it?”
“Read ya loud and clear.” Angela’s voice rings from my phone. “Go get that corgi.”
“Think you can shout both of us over to him?”
“Just shut up and direct my head. Ready?” Yuko hugs me tight, takes a stance, and opens her mouth.
11:57 a.m.
I lock eyes on the sprinting furball and guide Yuko’s head accordingly. “GO!”
Yuko lets out a sick death metal yell and propels us forward to the corgi. Despite his little legs, he’s hauling ass like I’ve never seen any animal do before. He zigs, zags, and tries to juke us around every tree and lamp post, but we’re gaining on him.
If it wasn’t for the nice shade, I’d be sweating up a storm by now.
“Almost there, Yuko! Just… a little… more…” I lean forward and reach for the corgi’s tail. He can’t be farther than three feet away… C’mon you little bastard… Give it up…
11:59 a.m.
The corgi is now glowing. Small bolts of purple lightning begin arcing off his fur.
“I’M GETTING US OUT OF HERE!” Yuko yells.
“WE’RE ALMOST THERE!” My hand brushes against the corgi’s tail, but it evades my grasp. “I CAN FEEL HIS TAIL ON MY FINGERTIPS!”
“DAMNIT! FINE! IF I BLOW MY VOICE OUT, I’M KICKNG YOUR ASS!”
“YOU’RE THE BEST! KEEP IT UP!”
We’re gaining on the corgi… but it starts running faster and faster. It begins leaving singed footprints behind. Must be at least thirty feet in front of us by now. A second face begins morphing out of the back of the corgi’s neck. It’s smiling at me. Taunting me. “So close… but this is ad-”
GASHINK!
A massive, metallic pillar plunges itself into the ground and crushes the corgi. No boom. No heat. Sure, there’s tremors, but that’s from the giant F-you pillar that just smacked itself into the Earth.
“YUKO! SLOW DOWN!”
“Kay!” Yuko stops yelling and slows us down, but it’s no use. We still collide with the pillar, bounce off it, and fall on our backs onto the grassy field. Everything hurts and my head’s ringing a little… but I’m still functional… It sucks, but I can manage… My eyes are shut from wincing so hard.
“Yuko… you okay? Damnit…”
“Yeah…” Yuko groans. “I feel like crap… but I’m good… Damnit…” she inhales through her teeth. “OH COME ON! WHAT THE FUCK?!”
“What…?” I open my eyes and see an armada of floating battleships and pillars soaring above the park. Small legions of armored humanoid aliens equipped with jetpacks flood out of the ships and begin heading for any communications buildings and powerlines. “Well… at least we stopped the corgi…”
BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
A series of violent explosions erupts in the distance.
Will
October 30th, 2007. 12:00 p.m. Millenium Park. I’ve been looking for this corgi for the past twenty minutes and couldn’t find anything. Darn it darn it darn it! How do I fail at something so simple?! The rest of my team continues to look frantically around the park until a bright light in the distance assaults our eyes. It’s painful, hot, and felt like I was going to explode just looking at it. It leaves just as quickly as it arrives due to being crushed by a giant alien craft.
“You… you have to be kidding…” I look up at the sky and take in the dredged sight. The aliens are all clad in armor that’s as brilliant as it is sturdy. I just watched one shrug off gunfire, a barrage of Techs, and even a fire hydrant get chucked at it. Not a scratch or a stain on them either. They’re around five feet tall, vaguely feminine looking, and have these helmets with two cones sticking out the top of their heads. The jetpacks look like they’re from the future but smell like they run on diesel. There’s no mistaking it. It’s the Lunar Legion. Doesn’t matter how big or heinous the job is… as long as you can pay them enough livestock, they’ll do it. Actually had a run in with a rogue squad down in Houston. Bastards went on a pasture-stealing spree. Took me and every other rancher in the state just to track them down. To think the Elite is teaming up with them… I might just be in over my head.
Anyway, while they’re all flying over the park to try and get to the rest of the city, A.D. has been shooting some down with potshot fireballs while Janelle keeps snapping at the air trying to hit as many as possible. Out of twenty snaps, she only manages to hit three dead on and scorch one other. That’s an improvement. Meanwhile, Sejong is just standing there looking like they are trying desperately to not vomit.
“Will!” Sejong turns to me. “What do we do?! We weren’t prepared for this!”
“Calm down.” I steady my hand. “It’s just the Lunar Legion. Nothing to worry about.” I lie. “Think you two can throw out some suppressing fire?!”
“Hell yeah!” A.D. smiles as he charges up another fireball. “I’ve been itching to practice some new zoning strats.”
“I can try…” Janelle takes a deep breath before re-adjusting her aim. Small sparks begin to fly off her hands. “What are you doing?”
“I’m going to try and evacuate as many people as I can.” I point to the rest of the park.
Just as I’m done talking, a big alien craft just flies right through a building and a deafening screech pierces through the sky.
SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
A giant microphone crackles and fizzles with the ferocity of a thousand Kentucky thunderstorms before calming down. The sides of the alien craft light up and display a pale woman with long white hair, piercing red eyes, long bunny ears sprouting off the top of her head, and a killer jawline. “Dear subhuman filth,” The voice sounds dominant enough to make my stance falter, yet strangely cute. “Remember 1969? Remember how you invaded our airspace and infected our people with your terranean pathogens? It’s our turn to return the favor. This planet shall be swept clean of your filth and be made into living space for the master Tsukijin race. Die.” The mic cuts out and the craft begins to shoot small missiles into space. A few moments later, burning satellite shrapnel comes crashing down all over Chicago.
“THAT’S WHAT THE LEGION LOOKS LIKE!?” Janelle yells loud enough to drown out the rest of the chaos.
“They’re so… cute…” Sejong muses at the Tsukijin demolishing a daycare.
“Okay… uh…” I blink. “I’m going to try and clean up some rubble with Sejong.”
“Right!” Sejong begins booking it out of the park and I begin to follow them.
“Wait! Will!” Janelle calls out to me. “Give me a kiss!”
“Now is not the time!” I continue running away.
“WILL!” Janelle whines.
I turn to blow her a kiss before booking it out of the park with Sejong.
Suzy
October 30, 2007. 12:03 p.m. My office. Have my computer open on three different news site tabs and my TV’s set to five different news channels. Okay… okay… Good…” I slump back into my seat and take a deep breath. Good… Everything’s still okay. All is well.
Cameron drips in from the ceiling and begins signing at me like crazy. Poor kid doesn’t even have all his fingers fully formed yet and he’s signing like he’s in a mute rap battle.
“WHAT?!” I lunge out of my seat and nearly punch right through my desk for the third time this month. “OH COME ON!”
Immediately, the news sites refresh and the news channels explode with reporters on the scene. All of them look happy to be there. Aliens flying, people trapped under rubble, people and aliens shooting back at each other, and they’re smiling.
“Well… Well… well…” I lean back in my chair and rub my temple. “Alright.” I sigh, take the big red button out from under my desk, and rub my hands. “Time to call in the Alumni.”
Yuko
October 30, 2007. 12:22 p.m. Outskirts of Millenium Park. I’ve followed Vivian out of the park while managing to avoid getting shot by the lagomorph bastards. I mean, they weren’t aiming for me. They were mostly taking potshots at people trying to shoot them down with icicles, lightning, and just good ol’ fashioned gunfire. I even managed to get a legion of them to fly off course and plummet to the ground with a well-aimed yell. Felt. So. Good.
“Vivian! What the hell are you doing?!” I pull out her phone from my shirt and yell into it. “Angela! Get us out of here!” I reach for Viv’s hand.
“Angela, just hold on!” Viv rolls her wrist out of my grip and continues to run towards the rubble of a destroyed building. Dunno why she’s headed towards it.
“Don’t ‘hold on’ me!” I yell back at her. “You promised! We stopped the bomb! Mission done! Let’s get out of here!”
“Hold on! Just give me a sec!” She barks back without looking at me, reaches into her pocket, puts on her mask, undresses, revealing the suit I made for her underneath, and finally reaches a big rubble pile of concrete, bricks, piping, and whatever the hell else goes in a building. She runs her hands over each enormous piece of rubble and shrinks each one down to mere pebbles. With each piece she shrank, she revealed injured people who had been trapped underneath and grew exponentially taller in the process. By the time Viv was done, she grew tall. Like, freakishly tall. About as tall as the surrounding buildings. Tall enough to make Angela poke her head out of the phone and make some gross sounds.
“Ooooh… Viv honey. You don’t have to spoil me like that… God her ass looks great from down here.”
I begin slapping Angela’s face back into the phone screen. “Now. Is. Not. The. Time!”
“Owowowowow! Wait! You!” Angela calls out. “What’s the plan?!”
“I’m going to destroy those ships. Wish me luck. Angela, take Yuko back to Aegis.”
“WHAT?!” I yell up at Viv, but she doesn’t even budge from my voice.
“NOW!” Viv waves goodbye to us.
“You got it!” Angela grabs my hand and pulls me into the phone.
I spin and spin and spin and spin. Everything feels like it’s jumbled up. My ass feels like it’s in my ear and my neck feels like it’s in my foot. This sucks. I hate this. I hate Angela. I want to vom.
Viv… What the hell are you doing…
Sejong
October 30, 2007. 12:27 p.m. Okay, Vivian’s really big now and grabbing and tossing ships into each other. She’s doing it, like… holy crap her Tech’s super good for this. I wish mine was that good for fighting…
zap zap zap zap zap zap
The Tsukijins’ rifle fire zips past us and sets patches of the ground aflame. Some unfortunate people fleeing as well as heroes firing at the flying aliens get hit by the rifle fire. Each hit only makes me want to run harder, so I do.
Will however, stays behind and tries to help one up. “Ma’am, can you stand?”
She’s not talking. All she can do is cry and writhe on the pavement.
I don’t know why I turn around, but I do. A chunk of her leg is just gone. Like, not shot off or sliced off. Looks more like it was burnt clean off in an instant. A burnt stump oozing with blood and pus lies where her leg once was.
blurp hacklkf!
Hot bile shoots out of my mouth and cascades onto the pavement. I feel better and worse at the same time.
“Darnit, Sejong! Pull yourself together!” Will lifts the woman’s arm over his shoulder and starts dragging her past me and out of the park. “The rest of you, get out! Don’t be heroes! Let us take care of it!”
“If you say so!” The citizens shoot one more volley at the sky before retreating.
rumble rumble
I feel something… big rumble under the earth. I don’t like it one bit. “Hey… Will. Do you hear that?”
“Yeah. Whatever it is, just keep moving darnit!” Will keeps running without looking back at me.
In order to keep up with Will, I change back into a human form.
Ten seconds later, a massive worm breaches out of the earth to the left of us and belches at the sky. If I had to wager, I’d say the part that’s out of the ground is about forty to fifty feet tall. It is pale white and is also sporting bunny ears in addition to countless veins and eyes. There’s too many eyes to count. Each one has to be at least ten feet in diameter and has no fewer than three pupils. Its mouth looks… disgusting, but not unfamiliar…
“Alright, Sejong!” Will takes his whip out from his belt, runs his hand over it, and cracks it. “Stay back!”
I stop moving and watch Will do his thing.
Will swings his whip clean through half of the worm. White blood and green guts shoot out into the sky and rain down for three seconds before stopping abruptly.
“What now…?” If I had any more bile, I’m certain I would be all over my feet by now.
A fresh looking worm head grows out of the wound then belches angrily at us.
“Okay, I’m going to keep running now!”
“Sejong! Get back here!” Will barks at me. “I have this under control!”
Just as Will begins winding up another whip swing, massive, pulsating tumors cover every inch of the worm until it keels over and hits the ground. Motionless. Not one more peep, belch, or twitch escapes its cursed body.
“What the hell…?” I ask.
“Hello there.” An older looking woman dressed in her Sunday best and a man who just looks like he just walked off a wrestling mat walked out from around the worm’s corpse. They must be this Doc and Oso I hear so much about.
“Oh… Oh…” Will forces a smile. “What are you two doing here?”
“Hey.” Oso cracks his knuckles. “Is that how you greet someone who just saved your scrawny ass?”
Will sighs and nods, but still maintains that shiny smile. “No hard feelings?”
“Oh, dear. There are plenty of hard feelings.” Doc stares daggers at Will. “If we survive this, you will be sure to get an earful.”
crackle crumple wryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
The sound of a giant microphone penetrating the sky violates our ears again. The same admittedly gorgeous Tsukijin from earlier starts barking orders. I don’t know what they’re saying, but a legion of jetpack Tsukijin soon fly around us and aim their rifles, so I got the general gist of it.
Oso pulls a huge revolver out of a pair of briefs that look way too small, but makes his beefy butt look marvelous and aims it at the Tsukijin. “Hey, Willy. You wanna have a little competition? See who can take out more?”
“Now is really not the ti-”
pew pew pew pew pew pew
Before Will could continue, one of the bunnies open fired and decimated the rest of their squad.
“The hell?” Oso scratches his head with the barrel of his gun.
One of the bunnies takes off her helmet to reveal a completely foreign face. “I think I won this little contest.” She chuckles. “How are you two doing?”
“Oh, hey, Sejong!” Oso smiles and waves. “Thanks man!”
“Oh, we’re just going around looking for any injured people we can.” Doc nods. “How are you?”
“Killing every last legionnaire I can find.” that Sejong shrugs before putting the helmet back on. “Keep it up.” She flies away and continues blasting every Tsukijin she comes across.
“Wait…” I speak up.
“Doc… um…” Will interrupts me. “I know we’re not quite right bu-”
“Just hand me the injured one.” Doc beckons. “They matter more right now than you ever will.”
“Right…” Will gingerly hands the woman over to Oso who then presents her to Doc.
“Get out of here.” Doc lays her hands on the woman and begins restoring her leg. “Be useful.”
“Right away.” Will waves goodbye to Doc and Oso and speeds off.
Meanwhile, I find myself staring absently at the Sejong flying in the sky.
“Can we help ya?” Oso taps me on the head. “You got a crush on her or something?”
“No.” I shake my head without looking up at him. “Sorry… I just got distracted. Good bye.” I follow Will out of the park.
Josh
October 30, 2007. 12:29 p.m. Back at my dorm room. I’m enjoying some nice microwave popcorn on my couch while I watch everything go to hell on tv. Yo… Vivian! Tear! IT! UP! Holy crap that girl’s styling on those bunny chicks. Any guilt I had is gone. She’s got this covered… Though she could take it a little easier on them. Can’t stand to see a bunny girl get hurt.
Mmm… damn this butter’s good. Wonder what Angie did to it.
bzzt
Angela and Yuko fly out of the phone plugged into the wall socket by the tv and land butt-first on the floor.
“Aw, what?” Angela dusts herself off and gets up. “You made popcorn without me? Gimme some.”
“Make me.” I say with a mouth full of delicious, delicious kernels.
Yuko gets up, walks towards Angela, turns her around, and shakes her shoulders violently. “What the HELL is wrong with you?!”
“What do you mean?” Angela manages to snatch some popcorn out of the bag while she’s being shaken. “I did what you told me to do!”
“What?! I said to pull us out when I said so! Not when Viv said so!”
“Oooh… Oops.” Angela swallows some popcorn. “You want me to send you back?”
“I…” Yuko purses her lips and lets go of Angela. “Damnit… I don’t know…”
“Well, when you figure that out, lemme know, sweetcheeks.” Angela yawns, sits down on my legs, and starts watching tv. “In the meantime, I’m going to treat myself to this rad kaiju fight.”
Yuko grumbles under her breath and sits down.
“Relax, relax. There’s nothing to worry about.” Angela pats Yuko on the shoulder. “Vivian’s beasting on those ships, we got not-”
bzzzzoooooooort
One of the ships unloads a volley of missiles at Vivian, creating a gigantic puff of metal and smoke and launching her back into a building.
“VIVIAN!” Yuko yells and breaks the tv in two with her voice.