Suzy
October 11, 2007. 7:28 a.m. The office. I’ve been here all night just looking through Patty’s records. I now remember every aspect - every detail - of her transformation… If only I knew how Doc’s Tech worked. I’d know if she’s lying.
doop a doop boop
Great… The hell does Pavise want? I tap a button and open the video message on my comp. The Headmaster of Pavise Academy shows up on screen. He looks awfully comfy. His mustache is well groomed. I can see a plate of freshly made toast and eggs on his desk. “Ah, Suzy. So happy you decided to take my call. Sorry I couldn’t get to you sooner.”
“Yeah, yeah.” I lean back in my chair. “Look, I’m really busy right now, so just make it quick.”
“What are you busy with? Assaulting guests?” he gives a hearty chuckle and takes a bite of his eggs.
“Wilhelm.”
“Apologies. I thought you could use a laugh.”
“Read the room, asshat. What do you want?”
“I wanted to thank you for having your students deal with that escaped experiment back in September. Words cannot describe how much of a headache you saved me.”
“Yeah yeah… Just give me a copy of your research notes on them and the usual thank you money and we’ll call it a deal.”
“You got it. I’ll even reimburse you for the property damage and cover-up expenses.”
“Thanks.” I nod. “How’s the Tech transfer surgery progressing?”
“We’ve hit some… roadblocks as you have seen, but it’s getting better. The bodies aren’t just decaying spontaneously anymore.”
“Good. Good. I’ll see what I can do with the notes in my spare time. You probably just forgot to carry a one somewhere.”
“If that’s the case, I’ll buy you a year’s worth of coffee.”
“Now I’m definitely finding that missing one.” I chuckle. “Thank you.”
“Anything for a friend.”
I hear knocking from the other side of the screen. “The hell is that?”
“Erm. Nothing. Excuse me. I must meet with some clients. Toodaloo.”
The video feed dies and the lab returns to silence once more. “Geez… Thought that prick would never call in.”
bzzt
The doorbell rings.
“What now?” I look up from my desk and see Vivian dragging another sleeping Sejong to my office. He’s completely covered from the neck down in rope and his mouth is neatly sealed with duct tape.
“Vivian… what the hell’s going on now?”
“So… two more Sejongs came back.”
“Okay… just…” I feel like my temple’s about to burst. Jesus Christ, this week. “Just explain everything.”
“Right.” Vivian closes the door behind her and rests Sejong on a chair across my desk. “Hey… um… How’d the dinner go?”
“Do I look like I want to talk about it?”
“You’re right. Sorry, boss.” Vivian rubs the back of her head.
I glance over to the still sleeping Sejong and rub my temple. I gotta slow down on the caffeine… “Alright. Just get it over with. What’s happening now?”
“Basically, two Sejongs came back. One of them was from the entrance exam and just got back from a vacation in Korea. That one is apparently completely unaffiliated and unaware of any villain shenanigans. The other one is right here and tried to attack us in the dorm last night.”
I close my eyes for a moment and take a deep breath. “Vivian, come closer. Look me in the eye.”
“Of course.” Vivian obeys me like a dog. “Why?”
“I got a lot on my plate right now, so I don’t feel like doing any more research. Are you telling the truth?”
“Of course, Suzy.” Vivian responds without a moment of hesitation. “I’m not smart enough to lie.”
“No.” I sigh and poke Vivian on the forehead. “You’re smart enough not to. I’ll take care of the shapeshifter here. You go back and ace your midterms.”
“You got it.” Vivian shoots me a thumbs up. “Oh, before I go, one last thing.” she starts digging through her jacket. “Here!” she pulls out a neatly folded napkin from her jacket and puts it on my desk. The napkin unfolds to reveal a chocolate chip cookie. It looks… off. Not good. Not terrifying… Just off. It looks hard and soft. Both burnt and undercooked. Some chocolate chips are gooey perfection and some still have frost on them.
“Oh… What’s this?” I swear to god if this cookie moves or shapeshifts, I might just kill everyone.
“It’s a midterm cookie.” Vivian takes another one out of her pocket and takes a bite. “I just made a bunch for my team and had some left over, so here ya go.”
I take another deep breath. Come to think of it, I haven’t inhaled in a while. Should probably do that. “Thank you, Vivian.”
“Ah, don’t mention it. Least I can do.” She stands there with her hands behind her back and says nothing else.
“You got anything else to say?”
“Wha? Oh, no. I was just waiting for you to try a bite.” She smiles like a child.
I glance at the enigma cookie, wait a moment, float the cookie up to my lips, and take a bite. This is certainly a cookie. That’s… all I can really say about it. I’m impressed that something so strange looking has such little flavor.
“Well? Whatcha think?”
“Pretty good.” I force a smile and take another bite. “Good job on these.”
“No prob.” Viv pumps her fist. “Glad you like it. Alright. I gotta go do some last minute review. Good luck with whatever you got going on here.” She gives a little salute then retreats out of my office.
I hope she doesn’t lose that smile.
I swallow the remains of the cookie, look down at Sejong, and rip the duct tape off with a flick of my finger.
Sejong shoots awake. “YOW!” and immediately starts to try and shapeshift his way out of the binds.
I point at him and stop him in his tracks. Half his body is this eldritch purple goop and his other half has a very, very killable face. His remaining teeth are grit. His limbs are tense. I can see part of an exposed heart beating rapidly, but inconsistently. “Let me ask you something. Would it even matter if I killed you?”
Sejong’s form relaxes, but his heart looks ready to collapse out of what remains of his solid chest. Any visible anger has quickly been replaced with fear. His pupils dilate. He shifts and struggles against my tech to move, but nothing works.
“C’mon, answer me. I really want to know. Is there any point to keeping you alive when another you is just sitting nice and tidy in a safe house somewhere?”
“Please…” Words somehow manage to form out of this thing’s mouth. “I’m sorry… Just let me go… I won’t go back. I’m just here because Doc told me to.”
“Yeah, yeah. Following orders and all that jazz. Tell me, what happens if you complete your mission? Do you just remerge with another Sejong? What happens then? Do you lose your memories? Do you cease to exist? I’m curious...”
“Please… I’m sorry…” tears begin to well in Sejong’s eyes, but I won’t let them drop. I want him to drown in his own tears.
“No, seriously. Tell me. Do you have anyone who would miss you? Do you have anything to look forward to?”
In an instant, Sejong’s face twists and morphs. His hair grows out, his skin grows pale and spotted with freckles. Patty’s face and immaculate brown eyes look up at me. “I look forward to seeing you in hell.”
I clench my fist and the thing explodes into a puddle of guts and ooze. I feel its cool blood and icy viscera splash over my face and stain my cheeks as I fall to my knees.
Vivian
October 11, 2007. 4:21 p.m. Dorm room couch. Just woke up from a nap. My eyes are glued to the plate of cookies I made on the kitchen counter. Geez… What do I do now? I’m done with midterms, but no one else is... Never thought I’d say this, but I’m… bo-
Just as it’s starting to set in, A.D. opens the door and enters the dorm. He immediately heads to the kitchen counter and shoves three cookies into his mouth.
“How’d the tests go?”
A.D. opens his mouth to speak, but only dry air comes out. He starts pounding his chest and hunches over the kitchen counter.
“You dyin?” I ask with my cheek still pressed against the couch cushion.
“Hoo!” A.D. coughs a solid cookie chunk into the sink before resting his hands on his head. His eyes are red, he’s crying a bit, and his voice sounds awful, but kinda badass. “Nah… I’m good. Not gonna let a cookie KO me.”
“I take it you like the cookies.”
“Vivian. Look at me.” he gets close. “Without hyperbole, these are some of the finest cookies I have ever eaten in my life. I don’t think I would have survived that test without them.”
“Good to know.” I smile and yawn. “At least it’s over with, right?”
“Yeah…” A.D. opens the fridge and begins pouring himself some almond milk. “For now…” he says before drinking straight from the carton.
“Yeah… Anyway, you got any plans this weekend?”
“Hmm…” he wipes off his milk mustache. “Nothing much… mostly just training for the Novus Annos Tournament.”
“The what?”
“It’s the tournament Aegis throws every year after Christmas break. How do you not know about it? It’s been advertised in every weekly school newspaper.”
“The school has a newspaper?”
“Vivian… please. I’m begging you. Read something besides manga for once.”
“If the school newspaper wanted me to read it, the editors would’ve put fat titties in it.” I shrug.
A.D. shakes his head like my dad and takes another sip of milk.
“You wanna go on a mission this weekend?”
A.D.’s brow furrows, but he grins ear from ear. “Where’s this coming from?”
“We’ve been on a team mission only twice and both ended kinda horribly. I’d like to have at least one team mission this semester that doesn’t end in a complete dumpster fire.”
“I do like the sound of that…” A.D. rubs his chin. “I’m down Friday night if you are.”
“Hell yeah. Let’s do it.”
“Yeah yeah!” A.D. pumps his fist a little.
“Shoot!” I jump out of the sofa. “I nearly forgot! I have to do research on the paranormal!” I bolt out of the dorm and towards the school library.
Janelle
October 11, 2007. 4:43 p.m. Library. Let me see… History of villainy is done. Aced that one no problem. P.R. is… over. All that’s left is combat strategies tomorrow and I’ll be done. Spend the weekend training with Will, maybe go on a date now that the bruising’s gone. Still feels awful, but I look cute again, and that’s what matters. I glance through window after window of full study rooms. Some students are asleep. Some are crying. Others are getting… busy. I really should have reserved a room.
Just as I’m about to give up and return to my dorm, I see a study room inhabited only by Yuko. She’s hunched over the table with her eyes glued to a book. How convenient. Two birds with one stone. I knock on the door and open. “Hey… Yuko. Do you mind if I join you?”
“Damnit!” Yuko nearly falls out of her seat, covers the book with her hands, and turns to me. “Oh… it’s just you. The hell do you want?”
“I just asked? Can I join you?”
Yuko just stares at me for a while in silence. “Sure. Go ahead. Shut the door, will ya?”
“Of course. Thank you.” I carefully close the door, slide my backpack onto the table, and open my notebook. “Hey, Yuko.”
“Yes~?” she asks with her hands still covering the book.
I feel a spark drip off my fingertip. “I’m sorry for what happened at the dinner.”
“Mmmhm. What are you sorry for?”
“I’m sorry for being a bitch, okay? Can we just forget that whole thing happened?”
“Hey, you admitted it. All water under the bridge.”
“Thank you.” I exhale and begin looking through my notes.
“If you don’t mind me asking, uh… why? Why were you like that?”
I pinch the bridge of my nose and lean into the table. “I… I don’t know, Yuko. Will just means a lot to me, okay?”
“You’ve known each other for a month. Like, goddamn I thought I moved fast.” Yuko lets out a little chuckle. “Did you already pick out kid names too?”
“... Am I not supposed to?”
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.
Yuko erupts in a quick spurt of laughter. “Jesus Christ, Janelle. Just… geez.”
“There’s no point to a relationship if you don’t put 110% into it.” I clench my fist and reabsorb accidentally discharged fire. “Look, let’s just change the subject. I need to study.”
“You got it. You got it.” Yuko shrugs and goes back to reading her book. “We cool.”
I quickly sift through the first four pages in my notebook. Wow, I remembered way more than I thought I did. I can afford to take it a little easy. “Actually, one more question. If you don’t mind me asking, of course.”
“Shoot.” Yuko says without looking up from her book.
“What are you reading?”
“...” she slides the book closer to her. “Research. Gotta not fail, ya know?”
“That doesn’t look like any course textbook. What are you researching? Maybe I could help.”
“I really doubt it. Thanks though.”
“Yuko. I promise I won’t tell, okay? Please, let me help you. It’s the least I can do.”
Yuko purses her lips and starts twirling her hair around her ring finger. “Promise not to tell anyone?”
“I promise.”
Yuko takes a deep breath before lifting the cover of the book towards me. It says ‘How to Impress Girls Volume 3’.
“Are you serious?”
“It’s a joke read.” Yuko drops the book back to the desk. She doesn’t seem to be looking me in the eye and is sweating. “A friend told me there’s some hilarious suggestions, so I had to have a look. Needed something to cheer me up after the midterms.”
“Really?” My eyebrow would shoot off into space if it could. “Got any good ones?”
“Uh… yeah.” Yuko flips back a few pages. “Method #325: Carry them princess style. It’s even better if you surprise them with it.”
“That… sounds absolutely adorable…” I feel my heart flutter just thinking about it. Will’s arms against my back… My ear to his chest hearing his heartbeat… Having my safety be fully dependent on him. I’d feel so small and weak. Perfect.
“Really?” Yuko’s eyes perk up. “Good to know…” she goes back flipping through the book.
knock knock
“What?” I look over to the door and see Vivian enter the room. She’s carrying a collection of dusty looking books. “Hello, Vivian.”
“Yo sup.” Vivian puts the small tower of books down on the table and sits next to Yuko. “Did I interrupt anything?”
“Mmhm.” I nod. “Yuko’s asking me for dating advice.”
Yuko looks like she’s trying to kill me with her stare alone. “It’s not that deep, dude. I’m just reading this for laughs.”
“Dating advice, hm?” Vivian rubs her chin. “Okay, this is going to sound cliche, but I think it’s really sweet when someone just asks you how your day was when you get home. It sounds small, but you don’t realize how much it matters until it’s gone.”
“Oh my goodness yes.” I hug my arms. “Words of affection and concern are definitely my love language.”
All anger evaporates from Yuko’s face as she nods. “Uh… huh… Weird, but I guess I can kind of get it?”
“Oh!” Vivian snaps her fingers and turns to me. “You know what else is the good stuff?”
“What?” I ask.
“Consensual aggression.” a gross grin creeps across her face.
“I… don’t follow.”
“Just…” Vivian shakes her fist. “Sometimes you want to get pinned to the wall, you know? Nothing woohoo sexy has to happen. Just… feeling a little threatened sometimes is fun.”
Yuko’s eyes look ready to bulge out of her head. She says nothing and just retreats back into her book.
“Aah… You are a refined woman.”
“Why thank you.” Vivian leans back in her chair and chuckles. “Oh, one more thing. Having a barrelman in your house can’t hurt.”
“What’s a barrelman?” Yuko looks up from the book.
“Ohohoho.” I laugh. “Basically, every Filipino mother has a barrelman in her house. It’s supposed to be a little good luck charm for love and fertility.”
“Okay, but what is it?” Yuko scratches her cheek.
“Wait, hold up.” Vivian interjects and slaps her backpack onto the table. “I think I have one in my backpack.”
“Why do you have one in your backpack?” Yuko asks.
“Mom just got back from seeing some family in Pampanga. Bought them in bulk to give one to the whole family here.”
“Davao’s better…” I mutter under my breath.
“Uh huh sure.” Vivian fishes a barrelman out of her backpack and puts it on the table. Sure enough, it’s a barrelman. Little wooden figurine of a man with a moai looking head sitting inside a barrel.
“How’s this supposed to represent fertility?” Yuko tries to pick up the figurine, but ends up just taking the barrel off, revealing a wooden dong as long and as thick as the figure’s head.
“Pffft HAH!” Yuko’s head collapses onto the table. “Oh my god… that’s so good… aahahaha…” Her voice sounds painful, as if all air left her body in that initial spurt of laughter.
“Uuuh… Yuks?” Vivian pokes Yuko’s shoulder. “You okay?”
“I’m… fine…” Yuko wheezes as she pounds the table. “That… was just too perfect… he just… Hnnaah!” Yuko sounds like a seal having an asthma attack. “Ahohoooo.” she buries her face into the book and continues laughing.
“Yuko… it’s not that funny.” I’m now starting to genuinely worry for her. I once shadowed a doctor and watched a man die from lung failure. One of the nurses told him a joke and he laughed for half an hour straight before dying in the hospital.
“I know… but… that just makes it funnier…” Yuko begins to cry. “Aaaaw man. My chest hurts.”
After seven minutes, Yuko finally settles down, and the three of us return to reading.
Vivian
October 11, 2007. 5:48 p.m. Library. I’ve been researching ghosts, spirits, banshees, and anything else that can be called a ghost for well over an hour. All the while, Yuko’s been holding my hand under the table. Every time I glance back to her, she looks like she’s trying desperately to hide a smile. Pursed lips, tense neck. Her lip was quivering just like her legs.
Her hand was so smooth as if it had been bathing in lotion her entire life. Nails were manicured to a fine sheen. Each one of them were different colors too, but that’s just the usual for her. Thumbs got this baby blue, pinkies were pink, ring fingers were purple. Index and middle fingers were left unpainted and looked like they were recently cut super short. Wonder why.
As I flipped through pages, Yuko kept her hand firmly on mine. No matter how sweaty my palm got, she refused to let go. Her grip was firm, but not harsh. Okay, maybe just a tad harsh. She would occasionally run her palm up my arm. If she does that to my thigh… Hoo boy we’re going to have a problem, but a good problem.
Here’s the most important deets of my research:
* Ghosts:
* Tied to this world by vengeance
* Once their vengeance is achieved, they finally spirit away.
* Can be seen in mirrors
* Strength and appearance alter with the phase of the moon. Fuller moon = More power
The research concludes that the strengths and weaknesses of each ghost depend on what kind of person they were while they were alive. Based off what I’ve seen from the Junko ghost, items considered holy in Christianity deter her, she has only possessed people at night, and she might not be able to possess people when they can see her. She also hasn’t killed anyone either… though that could just be her refusing to kill people. I’m confident if she wanted us dead, she would’ve killed us already. I feel like I understand Junko a little more… but if I want to fully understand her, I’ll have to know what she was like when she was alive.
Oliver
October 12, 2007. 3:14 a.m. Safe House.
Though it’s been too long
Since I’ve tasted sleep’s embrace
I must endure
There… My 1,000th haiku this week and I only needed three iv bags. Wait a second… That’s four syllables at the end. Dammit all. Was it even my thousandth? I can barely remember anything past five minutes ago. I remember someone talking to me and telling me to do something, but I cannot fathom who it was or what I was instructed to do.
Hold on a moment… I can write a better haiku.
Caffeine sweet caffeine
Despised friend yet crucial foe
I need to go pee
No no no! This is worthless! Absolutely worthless! It is not fair. The greatest authors of Eastern Europe produced timeless classics while bunkered out in a snowstorm with lethal levels of alcohol in their system… and yet I struggle to even sit up straight. Pathetic… this would be far easier if I could just get some decent sleep!
…
…
Okay, one last attempt before I curse the gods.
Caffeine sweet caffeine
Crucial foe yet despised friend
This is the same poem.
This cannot continue.
As I begin to consider joining my ancestors, the door to my room creaks open and a figure walks inside. I say figure because I’m not sure what is real and what is a farce of Morpheus at this point. Everything about this figure alludes me. Their face, body, and; most importantly, hair length are all indistinguishable.
The figure bends down and puts what I hope is their face next to mine.
“Oliver. Hey! Oliver!” Sejong’s voice shakes my body.
“Oh… greetings, Sejong. You are Sejong, right?”
“Yes.” She nods before waving her hand in front of my face. “Are you feeling okay? Do you need any food? Any drinks?” Sejong pauses. “Any company?”
Upon closer inspection, I notice she is wearing her hair long today. This brings great comfort to my ancient 27-year-old soul.
“Do you have any hummus?”
“Yes.” Sejong lifts up a grocery bag. “Actually just got back from the store. Even got some pita bread and cucumbers for you.”
“Ah… thank you, Sejong. Your prudence is matched only by your hair style.”
A sordid hybrid of a wheeze and a laugh escapes Sejong’s lips. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
I hear the sound of plastic containers opening up as the scent of fresh hummus blesses my senses. “What are you doing?”
“I’m opening the cucumbers.”
“There’s no time.” I toss my head onto her lap. “Just dump the hummus into my mouth.”
I wish I could see the look on her face. “Are you serious?”
“Sejong… there’s no time… I can see all fifty generations of my bureaucrat ancestors frowning down upon me.”
Sejong laughs. “Alright, man. Just don’t blame me if you vom.” she presses the tub of hummus to my lips and gently slaps the tub, letting nature’s goodness flow into me.
The texture… the taste… Most importantly… the nutrients. I feel essential vitamins and minerals flowing through my veins. I am certain this is what sex feels like. Carbohydrates will soon be… ooooh my eyelids just shut. That’s not good.
“No no no!” Sejong resumes laughing as she shakes my head and slaps my cheeks. “Oliver, wake up! C’mon, buddy! Please! I’m sorry for getting hummus in your nose!”
As soon as I feel hummus slide up my nose, I shoot back awake. It burns, but is still so good… “Bwah! Ow… oof… That is quite unpleasant.”
“Are you okay?!” Sejong shakes my shoulders.
“Indeed.” I press my finger to my nostril, turn to my left to face Sejong, and inhale the remaining hummus. “Why ask?”
“Oliver, you’re talking to a wall.” Sejong’s voice shifts behind me. “I’m over here…”
“... Sejong? Can you please ask Doc if I can sleep more often? Please?”
Sejong pauses. “Absolutely.” She grabs my shoulder and looks me right in the eye. “You can’t continue like this…”
Josh
October 12, 2007. 3:12 p.m. Dorm room. Just chilling.
bzzt
I flip my phone open and see Yuko’s calling. “Yello.”
“Yo. Josh.” Yuko’s voice tears through the line. She sounds immensely frustrated. “Get your ass over here.”
“Why? What’s going on?” I rub my eye.
“I need help with something. You’re the only one I can trust with this.”
“My my. I’m honored. Are you just buttering me up for some free smokes?”
“No. I actually need your help with something… but a smoke break or three would be rad. Hurry. I’m at my dorm. Come now, but don’t tell anyone.” Yuko hangs up.
What… why would I not need to tell anyone? Oh… dude… am I going to finally get to feel those tiddies? Please please please please.
I roll out of bed, exit my room, and head to the hallway. On the way out, I see Sejong braiding Angela’s hair as she plays some kind of creepy anime bullcrap.
“Where ya going, sweetcheeks?” Angela asks without looking away from her game.
“I’m just going for a walk. I heard there’s some kind of free food event in the park.”
“Is this a walk? Or a walk?” Angela’s tone shifts. Kinda sounds like my abuela when I set off fireworks in the bathtub.
“Just a walk.” I rub the back of my neck. “Might do some training at the training center. Gotta prep for Chicago, ya know.”
“Aw damnit…” Angela drops her controller as a young looking girl on tv gets bound to a tree with vines. “Do I need to train for that or can I just chill in your phone?”
“I mean… you do you, man. You’re not really a fighter, so I’m sure you can get away with just chilling inside my phone.”
“Yeyeye. Love you, bigbutt.” Angela blows me a kiss before returning to her game.
I open the door and begin to head outside.
“Wait!” Angela raises her finger. “Pick me up some chips on the way back.”
“Oh!” Sejong turns to me. “Could you please pick me up some food coloring packs and some strawberries on the way back? I promise I will pay you back.”
“You got it, dude.” I give Sejong a little salute. “What kind? Cool ranch?”
“Cool ranch?” Angela sounds ready to vom. “What do I look like, some kind jackass who’s never been to flavortown? I need real gamer fuel.”
“Nacho cheese, got it.” I chuckle, wave goodbye, and head to Yuko’s dorm. I knock once and Yuko opens the door immediately. Damn near thought she was going to rip it off its hinges.
She pokes her head out the door. “Were you followed?”
I humor her and look back at my dorm door. “Pretty, pretty sure I wasn’t.”
“Good.” Yuko squints her eyes before yanking me in and locking the door behind her. She even put a chair under the handle for good measure. I like the look of this so far.
“So.” I take a few steps forward and clap my hands. “What can I do you for?”
“Joshy, hear me out.” Yuko opens the bottle of whiskey on the counter and takes a sip. “I need to practice on you. S’that cool?”
Dong: expanded
“Ah… Yeah. What do you need help with?” I put my hands on my hips.
Yuko puts the bottle back on the counter, grabs my shoulders, and repositions me up against a wall. She takes a step back and looks at me for a sec. “Okay, just stand still. I’m not going to hurt you.”
“What are yo-”
Before I could finish, Yuko thrust her arm near my head and planted her hand onto the wall. She takes half a step forward and leaned in, only to headbutt me.
“Damnit!” Yuko stumbles backwards and grasps her forehead. “Aaaagh! C’mon!”
Dong: retracted.
I recoil back and press my hand to my head. “The hell are you doing?”
“Vivian said she likes being pinned against a wall, so I need to practice.”
Well this is new. “Aaw. You two finally started dating?”
Yuko’s back straightens and she looks me in the eye with her hand still pressed to her forehead. “The hell you mean finally?”
“Nothin, nothin. I was just wondering when it would happen.”
Yuko groans, rubs her forehead, and retracts her hand to her hip. “What gave it away?”
“Yuko, when she’s in the room, you keep glancing back at her every ten seconds.”
Yuko sighs and glances to the side. “That obvious, huh?”
“Hehe. Yeah. So you need help pinning, huh? You called the right man for the job.”
“Thank you.” Yuko groans - again - and rubs her temples. “Please, just tell me everything.”
“Well not headbutting your partner’s a good first step.”
“Thanks, jackass.” Yuko chuckles and leans back next to me against the wall. “Can you show me anything?”
“Of course.” I get off the wall and turn around to face her. “There are several steps to good kabedon technique. First is posture. You can’t be slouching or have your hands hidden. Nobody likes that. Being all meek and hunched over doesn’t get you anywhere.”
“Got it.” Yuko nods. “Even if I’m pinning a shortie?”
“Absolutely if you’re pinning a shortie. Short people live for height differences in relationships. Trust me. Point #2. Create your plan ahead of time. How are you planning to pin? You using your arms? Your legs? Are you getting extra spicy and picking them up by their thighs? There’s a lot you can do. Many qualities separate a fantastic pinning from a mediocre pinning.”
“Wait… legs? How do you pin with legs?”
“I’ve seen people just lift their leg over their head and pin people to the wall like that. If you pull it off, you will get laid, but if you do it wrong, you’ll just split your ass right open.”
“Got it, got it.” Yuko nods again. “What else you got?”
“Then, when you have your plan in place, you do this.” I slide my foot between Yuko’s, pivot forward, and slam my hand into the wall beside her head. I’m so close to her, I can see my reflection in her eyes… Damn… she’s got some killer eyes. My hand slides onto her face and gently cups her cheek. In that moment, Yuko looks… different. Different, but Yuko nonetheless. My thumb strokes her cheek.
Yuko bites her lip and rushes towards me. In an instant, I feel her hands on the back of my head, her chest against mine, and her lips locked to mine.
nice
It was just a quick peck, but this is my chance… I’m finally going to feel them… My hands start to feel up her hips, but my body grows paralyzed. W-what is this? Is… is this my conscience?
Yes. The hell you doing?
I’m about to feel some world class tiddies, that’s what I’m doing.
Really? Are world class tiddies worth being That Guy?
I… C’mon, dude. They’re HUGE. One squeeze won’t hurt.
No amount of tiddy is worth being That Guy
Yeah… you’re right. I push Yuko away and wipe her spit off my mouth. “Yuko, what was that?”
“Hey man… That was really hot.” Yuko fixes her hair and licks her lips clean. “If you were me and I were you, you would’ve done the same…”
“I- This isn’t about me, this is about you. Aren’t you supposed to be dating Vivian?”
“Chill, we just went on one date.” She rolls her eyes and pauses. “It’s not anything serious…” her voice trails off. “I’m not her official girlfriend or anything.”
“How would you like it if Vivian kissed someone else?”
Yuko grits her teeth, opens her mouth to say something, then closes her mouth again. “If she does… I deserve it.”
“Yuko…” That’s rough. “How bout this? We just pretend this never happened, alright?”
“Sounds good…” Yuko nods as her gaze trails off to the floor. “Hey… sorry to ask, but-”
I reach into my pocket and toss her a carton I just bought. “Don’t spend it all in one place, kay?”
Yuko catches the carton and seems to force a smile. “Thanks, Josh…” she takes three cigs and tosses me back the carton. “You’re the best. Well, second best.” she gives me a soft hug before nudging me away. “Could you leave me alone for a bit?”
“You got it.” I pat her head before turning around, leaving her dorm, and closing the door behind me. As I’m about to open the door to my room, I hear the sound of glass breaking and Yuko yelling “God DAMNIT!” through the wall.