Suzy
October 1, 2007. 10:42 a.m. My office. Fuzzy slippers? Check. Bath robe? Check. Fresh pot of coffee? Check. Clean office? Check. New lavender air freshener? Check. Time for work. I’ve got newspapers, binders, a laptop with 80 tabs open, and I’ve modded the office TV to flip to a different news station every five minutes. Let’s see what we got on this Doc so far…. All I know is that this woman goes by the name Doc and that she has red hair and has an admittedly cute scarf. Can’t find any birth certificates on her either. Not even so much as a credit card record. No public records of misdemeanors or felonies… Though it is possible she just paid someone off to get those records cleaned. But that would just raise the question of why a felon would go around healing people.
TV time. Her face and appearance are not obscured at all. She looks older. If I had to wager, I’d say mid 40s. Curly red hair. She used her tech to heal the petrified people… but how? Is it cellular regeneration? Is it resetting something to a previous condition? Is it turning stone to flesh? I gotta shut up. They’re about to show another interview. Doc and an interviewer are sitting on lawn chairs at the street Patty messed up with bottles of water.
“So what brought you out here today? Were you just living here when this happened or did you travel here just to help all these people?”
“Ohoho.” She chuckles and adjusts her scarf. “I was just passing through here on vacation, heard about what happened, and decided that I couldn’t just stand around here and do nothing.”
“That’s awfully kind of you… Doc, was it?”
“Indeed.”
“So are you a licensed Hero or are you just an ordinary citizen helping out your community?”
“Oh no… I’m much too old to be a Hero.” She takes a sip of water. “There’s no way these old bones could keep up with younger heroes. I’m just an ordinary woman helping whoever I can.”
Ordinary women have birth certificates. There’s gotta be some ulterior motive here… If you just wanted to help, you wouldn’t be giving all these interviews. Is it fame you want? Money? If you wanted to help, you could’ve healed Patty…
“I see. I see, Miss. That’s wonderful. We definitely need more people like you in this world. Do you have any further plans this week? Are you just going to go back to your vacation?”
“Oh, no.” Doc shakes her head. “I’ll just be helping anyone I can.”
“That’s very noble of you.” The interviewer shakes Doc’s hand. “If you don’t mind, I have a nasty cyst on my shoulder. Is there any way you can help out with that?”
“Happy to help you.” Doc smiles. “Oh, wait. I forgot one thing. I’ll be traveling up to Los Angeles the second week of October, so if anyone needs healing, come on down. I’ll announce where I’ll be staying shortly. I look forward to seeing all the neat heroes L.A. has to offer.”
“Oooh, ma’am you will love it.” The interviewer shivers as Doc puts her hand to the cyst on her shoulder. “You should definitely see if you can stay at Aegis Academy. There’s a ton of student heroes that could really use your help.”
“Aegis?” Doc tilts her head. “Isn’t that the school that’s doing all those illegal experiments?”
“Aaaaand there it is.” I take a swig of coffee and feel its sweet heat warm me up.
“Whoa.” The interviewer chuckles. “That’s quite the allegation there, but between you and me, I wouldn’t put anything past that school.” The interviewer leans in towards Doc, but doesn’t lower his voice. “That Headmaster gives me the creeps.”
“Oh come now.” Doc giggles. “I am sure she’s much nicer in person.”
The TV changes to a different news channel showing off how the street was able to be cleaned in just a few days thanks to the local heroes. All the buildings look halfway done being repaired too. Wonder how much my students helped with that.
I take a sip of coffee and let it sit in the back of my mouth. “Interesting maneuver…”
Just as I swallow my coffee, my new secretary busts in the door. “Miss Headmaster, the students you dispatched to San Diego have returned. Shall I let them brief you?”
“Of course.” I wave my hand. “Let them in.”
“O-of course, Miss Headmaster!” She bows and rushes back into the lobby to escort the three in.
Does she need a prescription or something? Poor girl sounds like she’s going to pop a blood vessel at any moment.
Will, Janelle, and Josh walk in the door in their civ clothes. Josh takes one of the chairs and starts to lean on the back two legs.
“You want that seat?” Will offers the empty chair to Janelle.
“Oh, no no. I’m good. You can have it.”
“I’ve been sitting for the past three hours. I need to stand a little bit. Please. I insist.”
“Are you sure? If you’re tired it’s no issue.”
“I mean it.” Will smiles and pulls the chair towards her. “Just c’mon and take it.”
“No no no.” Janelle shakes her head. “It isn’t fair if I stand while you sit.”
I point my finger at Janelle and plant her ass in the chair. “Can we shut up and get this debriefing started already?”
“Yes, ma’am.” Janelle flinches before looking down at her thighs. “Sorry, ma’am.”
“Did Joshyboy here have any run-ins with this Faust?”
“Not that we’re aware of.” Will shrugs.
“Did he do his job or just bitch the whole time?”
“He helped out.” Janelle smiles. “Helped pick up a ton of broken glass.”
“Aww how sweet. Doesn’t it feel good to help people out, Joshyboy?”
“It’s nice… I guess.”
“What about you, Janelle?” I massage my left bicep. “How bad were the injuries?”
“I was kinda made irrelevant once Doc showed up. Before that though, I was mostly treating on-site injuries.”
“Did you meet this Doc?”
“Yeah.” Will nods. “After the mob died down, she just wandered around the site and talked to everyone she could.”
“What’d she say to you?”
“Keep up the good work. It makes me so happy to see young, strong, handsome boys like you helping out the community.”
“She did not say handsome.” Josh sneers.
“You must have misheard her.” Will shrugs.
“Isn’t pride a sin?”
“Ain’t tattoos?”
“Touche.” Josh puts his hand in his pocket.
“Did she say anything weird to any of you? Anything suspicious? See anything nefarious?”
“Nope.” Janelle shakes her head. “She just healed everyone at the first-aid section and commended me on my work.”
“And you, Josh?”
“Didn’t say much.” Josh shrugs. “Was too busy picking up glass.”
“I see… Very well. You are all dismissed.”
The three walk away and exit the office.
Janelle
October 2nd, 2007. 4:11 p.m. The entrance to Will’s dorm. I am carrying a bag of chicken nuggets. Deep breaths… You can do this. Knock knock-knock-knock knock knock
Yuko answers the door in her usual school uniform outfit. “Did you bring it?”
“Is Will home?”
“Nope. He’s at Church right now.”
“But it’s Tuesday.”
“And?”
“Fair enough.” I shrug and pull the box of chicken nuggets out of the bag. “Here you go.”
Yuko smirks, opens the box, and counts the nuggets. “Alright. Come in.”
I enter and I see Vivian donned in a plain white t and sweatpants playing something on the TV… I can’t tell what it is, but there’s an anime girl moaning and being bound to a wall… I’m just going to ignore that.
Me and Yuko sit at the table by the kitchen counter. She sits with her legs wide open and starts devouring the nuggets. “So what’d you wanna talk to me about?”
“Well… uh…” I lower my voice to keep Vivian from hearing. “I need help… asking a guy out.”
“Eh?” A piece of chicken falls into Yuko’s shirt. “Why ask me?” she begins fishing it out.
“Every other girl I know doesn’t exactly seem… knowledgeable of this subject.”
We glance at Vivian who burps and scratches her stomach. She even has Dorito dust on her fingers.
“Fair point.” Yuko nods. “Do you want to get into his pants, his heart, or both?”
This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.
“Y-yuko!”
“You gotta be honest with me.” Yuko points a nugget at me. “I’m trying to help you here.”
“I… I guess both?”
Yuko smiles. “That’s good. Very nice. Who is this boy?”
“Promise not to tell anyone?”
“I promise.”
I take a deep breath and close my eyes. “It’s Will.”
“You like Will?!” Yuko raises her voice.
“Sshh!” I lean over and hold her mouth shut. “I just said to be quiet!” It’s too late. Sparks fly off my back and little beads of flame roll off my cheek like sweat.
“Eh? Really, Yuko?” Vivian pauses her game and walks towards us. “You didn’t know?”
“You knew?” Yuko and I ask in unison.
“It was really obvious.” Vivian chuckles.
“How?”
“You always sit next to him, you like and comment on every single one of his status updates, you slide your hand against him whenever you can. C’mon. This is textbook first-grade infatuation.”
“I- Ah-” I let go of Yuko and fall back in my seat. I take a few deep breaths to recall the fire I lost.
“You’re pretty cute when you blush.” Vivian points. “You can use that to your advantage.”
“Hey.” Yuko turns to Vivian. “I’m the one giving advice here.”
“Ooooh okay. Can you do me next then?” Vivian rests her arm on Yuko’s head. “I need your match-making services too.”
“What? Who do you like?” Yuko’s voice cracks.
“It’s a secret to everybody.” Vivian smirks and pats Yuko’s head.
“Excuse me.” I raise my hand. “Can we get back to my love issues?”
“Of course.” Yuko nods as Vivian takes a seat next to me. “What advice do you want first? Sexy times or romance times?”
“I think romance should go first.”
“Do you know what he likes?”
“Well let’s see… he likes rodeos, meat, horse riding, playing guitar, the color red, manga, wrestling, and Jesus. Oh, and cows.”
“Did you ask him all that or-?”
“Nope. I just inferred. He kinda wears his interests on his sleeve.”
“That’s true.” Yuko nods.
“So…” Vivian turns to Janelle. “I have an idea.” She turns back to Yuko. “Is it okay if I give her an idea?”
“Uh… sure?” Yuko looks just as confused as I am.
“You ask him to teach you some wrestling moves.” Vivian smirks. “That way he thinks you share an interest and you two get to touch each other a lot.”
I can feel my heart skip a beat. I sincerely hope that’s not a murmur.
“Just think about it…” Vivian continues. “You’re tossing and flipping each other… then Will gets on top of you and puts you in a submission hold… Your arms and legs would be bound, completely at his mercy… Your faces are mere inches away from each other… You can hear his heartbeat. That’s when you go in for the kiss or the question. Preferably the kiss though.”
“That…” Oh no. I feel my thighs begin to quiver just thinking about it. “That’s good… That’s a very good strategy… I will be sure to use that.”
“Thank you very much.” Vivian smiles and leans back in her chair.
“But is that how you want to be asked out?” Yuko leans forward. “You don’t really seem like the wrestling type.”
“If I wait too long, he’ll be snatched up. I’m surprised he hasn’t been seeing anyone yet.”
“Really?” Yuko tilts her head.
“Are you kidding me? That killer jawline, huge muscles, his height, and his perky butt… Oh my goodness mwah. Ten out of ten.”
“Janelle, he’s only tall because you’re five foot nothing.” Vivian shakes her head. “Also, his butt is flatter than mine.” She chuckles. “And mine’s pretty flat.”
“What are you talking about?” Yuko furrows her brow. “Your butt’s cute.”
Vivian smiles and looks like she’s about to cry. “Aaw… You think I have a cute butt?”
Yuko’s eyes widen for a second before turning back to me. “I… I’m just going to stop talking.”
“Yuko!” I snap my fingers. “Please. Stay. On. Topic.”
“Sorry, just… he really has a concave ass.” Yuko shakes her head.
“Gotta second that…” Vivian turns to me. “I can make his butt bigger if you want.”
“That… won’t be necessary. Thanks though.” I rest my head in my hand. “But what if he doesn’t find me attractive?”
“Do you know what his tastes are?” Yuko asks. “When it comes to women, I mean.’
“No… he’s been completely quiet on that. I can’t even infer anything.”
“Well~” Vivian waves her fingers. “If you’re feeling insecure about anything, I can take off - or add- a few pounds to wherever you like.”
“Oh yeah.” My eyes widen. “Vivian, why are you even in school with a Tech like that? You could make millions in plastic surgery.”
“Oh my god that could totally be a side gig…” Vivian’s face glows bright.
“What was that about staying on topic?” Yuko asks.
“Right… my apologies.”
“Do you know what fictional characters he likes?” Yuko asks. “That could be a good indicator of what he finds attractive.”
“That is a good point… I’ll have to ask him that, but I’m definitely going to ask him out by the end of the week. Hopefully.”
“I like that confidence.” Yuko nods. “Good luck.”
“But what if he doesn’t like me…” I whine.
“Then he doesn’t like you and you go after a man with a better butt.” Yuko shrugs. “You got nothing to lose. Just do it, coward.”
“You’re right…” I sigh and fall back into my chair. “Thank you, you two. Could you help me pick out an exercise outfit for when I ‘spar’ with him?”
“You came to the right girl for that.” Yuko nods. “I’ll prepare an outfit he won’t be able to resist. Just let me know when we can go clothes shopping.”
A.D.
October 3rd, 2007. 1:34 a.m. Hooo... aaag…. ow… Darnit… There’s… there’s much more villainous scum than I thought. My email’s been flooded with commissions, requests, and pleas for help this past week. I managed to redirect some to Nightwatch, Lunar Scythe, and Revenge Girl, so that helps a little. Plus it’s nice to network with fellow anti-heroes. Let’s see what else I have to do tonight… Three grocery delivery requests, gotta get back a wedding ring that got stolen, help a guy fix his roof, and feed and bathe some of the local stray dogs and cats. It’s a lot to do… but someone’s gotta do it… Justice waits for no man.
Just as I’m about to begin jogging to the station, I hear rapid footsteps behind me. I pivot around and begin charging a fireball. “Who’s there?”
I see Sejong standing before me with a small pink box in her hand. “Whoa, buddy. It’s me.” she waves. “Wanna sit down and just have a chat?”
“Can’t. I need to get going.”
“A.D., when was the last time you slept?”
“Uh…” I blink and begin counting on my right hand. “Sunday. Why?”
“Go to bed, take a shower, eat some good food.” Sejong takes a donut out of the box and begins to eat it. “You can’t save people if you’re dead.”
“I can’t take a break. As long as there’s people who need help, I need to be helping them.”
Sejong sighs and takes the donut out of her mouth. “Okay, A.D., I am going to punch you. If you can deflect or dodge it, I’ll leave you alone. Alright?”
“Fair. Hit me with your be-”
Sejong clocks me in my right cheek.
I stagger backwards and cup my face. “OW! What the hell?!”
“That’s it.” Sejong takes another bite. “If you can’t parry me, how are you going to parry a whole police station?”
“I wasn’t ready!” I clench my teeth. Damn… she’s got a pretty solid hook…
“Are you ready now?”
“Yes.”
Sejong roundhouse kicks me in my left ribs. As I keel over, I see disappointment wash over her face. “A.D., come on. You’re better than this. Go back to bed and please take a shower before you do. You smell like… actually I can’t think of anything comparable.”
“That bad huh…?”
“Yeup.” Sejong finishes eating the donut.
I look down at my gi… It has gotten significantly more soggy and dirtied. My back’s fused with it from sweat, my fingers and toes are covered with dried blood, and my stomach does hurt now that I think about it.
“It’s good that you want to help people, but you need to take care of yourself first and foremost. Got it?” Sejong reaches into the pink box again.
“Fine…” I sigh and stand back up straight.
“Hey.” Sejong pops a donut into my mouth. “It’s important to sit down with a friend and eat a pastry every now and then.”
“Yeah…”
“The money will still be there tomorrow, okay? I’m sure it’ll be wrapped up in a lawsuit or something. Come on. Let’s head back to school.”
“Fair enough…” I take a step, but immediately trip over my own feet. “You didn’t see that…”
“Need me to carry you back?”
I pause. “That would be nice…”
“Alright, Mr. Hero Man.” Sejong puts the box down before carrying me on her back. “Just hold tight.”
I slowly begin to fall asleep as she carries me… It feels nice…
zzz…
Jimmy
October 3rd, 2007. 3:12 a.m. Secret Heel Safe House for Big Heels. Full moon out tonight… Got my nice clothes on, got her stereo and cassettes, made sure all the incense was put out beforehand, turned off all the lights, and left one window open to let moonlight pour in. I stand next to the window and check myself in the glass. It’s hard to see, but I can just barely make out that my tie’s crooked. Hate these things… Who invented these? Can I suplex them? Ties serve no purpose. They’re just for lame business men. They don’t even look nice.
No matter how much I adjust my tie, I just can’t get it right. Either the tiny end is too long or the collar’s off to the side… which rich jackass decided that this is what was professional? A good mask and a nice clean speedo can be just as professional. Hell, I’d trust the one with a nice clean speedo more. They have nothing to hide.
Just as I’m about to tear the tie off, it adjusts itself perfectly. I can feel the weight of two arms rest on my shoulders and around my neck. Can’t help but smile. “Hey, Junko. Glad to have you here.”
The weight shifts off my shoulders and I see a figure appear in the moonlight. Petite, long black hair, flowing white dress, chubby cheeks, and a simple, adorable smile. Junko’s finally here. She stands there with her arms behind her body. Her lips move, but I can’t hear anything. Good thing I know how to read lips.
…
“Yeah, yeah… Thank you for fixing my tie. You look wonderful tonight.”
…
“Whaddaya mean it took you forever to get ready? How do ghosts even have clothes?”
…
“Don’t worry about it? I ain’t stupid. C’mon, try me.”
…
“Okay, okay. You can stop. Sorry. Forget I asked.”
Without saying another word, Junko rushes into me, wraps her arms around me, and embraces me in a tight hug. Her arms can barely fit around my glorious bod, but I return the hug regardless. It’s so nice to feel her again… Her skin’s cool and soft to the touch. I run my hand through her hair. Smooth as silk and soft as rain.
Junko just buries her face into my chest.
“I know… Thanks for saving me back at the museum. I promise I’ll be more careful.”
Junko shakes her head and hugs me tighter.
“Hey now. Dying wouldn’t be all that bad. I’d get to be closer to you if I died.”
Junko slaps me in the side then resumes hugging me.
“You’re right… Sorry…” I kiss her on the forehead and rub her back. “Want to start dancing? I brought all your tapes out of storage just for this.”
Junko nods, looks up at me, and smiles. That smile makes all this worth it.
We danced and danced and danced until the sun came up.
As the moonlight faded and the sun began to rear its ugly head, Junko gave me one more hug goodbye before fading into the air again.
I wave to nothing. “Let’s dance again next month, yeah?”
I can’t see her, but I can feel juuust a little bit of extra weight on my shoulders… That’s more than enough.