My eyes snapped open as I gasped for breath. I was once again lying on top of a straw-stuffed mattress. I was back in the room. Clothes were once again laid out neatly on the trunk at the foot of the bed, but this time my walking stick was there.
How had I gotten back to this room? The last thing I could remember was a white blur with pointy antlers and even pointier teeth. Then, just like that, I was back in my room. Well, I wish it was just like that... the advertisement added nothing to the experience. This kind of thing was going to make my head hurt. There was nothing that I could realistically do about that bad hare [giggle] day now. I might as well just go downstairs and see if there is some kind of food available.
There was no fresh smell of bacon. No hustle and bustle of adventurers. I walked into the common room and it was completely empty. No, not completely empty. A solitary figure sat, drinking despondently in the far corner.
The friendly barmaid stood behind the bar polishing mugs, as uncannily content as a monk on muscle relaxers. “Welcome back, sir. Can I get you an early lunch?” she asked with a bright, cheery smile.
“I…umm… bacon?” I said, brightening.
“Oh, I'm sorry sir. We only serve bacon for breakfast. We've got beef stew, mutton, a bacon burger, and a marinated chicken sandwich with bacon are on sale for only for 1 gold. For Premium subscribers, we have steak, elk burgers, and lamb vindaloo.”
“How did you know? I'm on a premium account.”
“I don't know, sir, You just seem like the kind of self-possessed gentleman who would be.”
“Okay, I guess that makes sense. I'll take a steak and an ale.”
“Very good, sir. No charge for premium members.”
“Thanks.”
“Did I hear that right? We got a damn preemie in the house.” The figure in the corner stood up and staggered my way. I realized after a moment's consideration that he was in fact the same man, or dwarf, I'd seen wandering in and out of the doorway this morning. “Hey you, you're that guy. Guy from this morning. The noob. You a premium noob?”
“I sort of have a premium membership. Yes.” I said.
“What are you doing here, noob? *hick* I haven't seen anyone start this game in months... or a week. Time is strange here. Seemed like everyone was around here a while ago, but no. They all moved on.” The smell of alcohol on his breath was overpowering and he seemed to loose his train of thought and stare off into space for a while. After a long awkward moment he shook himself out of his stupor. “So noob, how’s 'Endless Adventure Online’ shaping up for yah? Like, is it everything you thought it would be so far?”
“My name is Finch, not noob, and it's fun so far. Is that where we are? 'Endless Adventure Online’?”
“Of course we are. Where'd you think we were? Some other kind of fully-immersive fantasy game in a deep dive capsule? Don't answer that. I'm sure there are a dozen more just like it.”
“What do you mean? A deep dive capsule? I don't remember any kind of deep dive capsule recently.” My head spun as I remembered my girlfriend in the back room of that restaurant, the cell phone falling onto the floor. I didn’t remember anything about getting into a capsule or a rig. There were so many gaps in my memory. How did I get here? “Didn't pick this game. Exactly. I think the game picked me.”
“You're talking nonsense, kid. Games don't pick people. You know, you had to have signed up and joined with an account, regardless of if you're in a dive capsule, or a home rig, or that new wireless VR thing. How much does a premium account cost these days? Half a grand a month. I bet you sprung for that wireless VR BS. How much did it cost?”
“Oh, I don't know. I only have a premium account because there was an error and I was frozen. I, like, couldn't even breathe or feel my heartbeat 'frozen'. An admin had to get me unstuck. Afterwards the system made some kind of a ruling, and awarded me a premium account and a few emeralds.”
“Dang, I thought this game was getting buggy. That sounds like hell. I can relate, though, I kind of feel stuck here myself. That's what I get for signing up for six months of deep dive in a buggy game. Do you remember what kind of error it was? Maybe I can reproduce it and get a premium account for myself.”
“It had something to do with setting up a credit account and buying a subscription. I don't really remember.”
“Huh. Well, damn, that’s not going to work. Better luck next time. Hey, what are you doing here during the day? Shouldn't you be out gathering Jackalope pelts or something?”
“Silverberries, yeah, but I was attacked by Jackalopes and…”
“You died to Jackalopes! You are a noob.” He laughed and tried to pat me on the back. Due to the height difference, it was more lower back, just high enough to not quite be indecent.
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“Well, there were a lot of them.” I said defensively.
“Sure there were.”
“Yeah, I'm not even really sure how I'm supposed to survive with so many Jackalopes around. There were a whole bunch. Like, so many I was surrounded on all sides.”
“I’ve been to that valley. They come one at a time. I only ran into maybe ten the whole time I was there. Besides, they only had 6hp each. Not really a challenge... well except the big ones.”
“They didn’t just come one at a time. From the second I plucked that berry they were all over me.”
“Well, grind your Skills. It’s a noob area; give it an hour or so and you will be knocking them down left and right. Look, what Skills do you got?”
I thought back to the message when I had died. I had lost the Improvised Weapons Skill. Thinking about my skills, a window popped up with list of my skills.
“Skill Gathering level 1. Skill Observation level 1. Skill Improvised Weapon level 0 - penalty. This Skill must be relearned once lost. Relearning Skills will be more difficult.”
I looked back at the other bar patron. “Nope. Just two. Well, three technically, Gathering, Observation, and my class skill.”
“You got the noob stick. So, what happened? You didn't even try to fight off the Jackalopes? You didn't get Improvised Weapons?”
“Oh, I tried.” I said. “When I died I lost the Skill.”
“You know you don't lose Skills when you die, you lose experience and you don't lose experience when you're below level 10.”
“It's apparently a class feature.”
“What kind of a weird class do you have, Noob? Wait, I don't want to know. It's probably some high-tier bullshit. I don't need to know; it's only going to raise my blood pressure. I'm just here to drink quietly. You enjoy your noob-tastic day, okay.”
“I will.” I said uneasily. “Hey, wait. I don't think I caught your name.” The man pointed above his head and ‘Argyle the Car-gyle’ appeared above his head.
“Got it now. So what's a Car-gyle?”
“Don't be funny, Noob.”
“Sorry, Argyle.”
“That's right. Guy is fine too. Anyway, scram, I've got some serious drinking to do.”
“All right, see you later Argyle ” I backed away from the counter and walked out of the inn. I hadn't really been hungry and somehow talking with him was really hurting my head. The colors in the street were too bright and the noises too crisp and intrusive. I couldn’t tune out the cart on cobblestone and the calling of vendors.
How had I gotten here? Was I in a deep dive capsule? I don't remember signing up for a game capsule or intentionally playing it. I remember the commercial starting, the hotel room with a pixelated toilet. The last thing I remember was being with my girlfriend. We definitely hadn’t been trying to play a game. I had the sense that someone would be severely disappointed in me for getting lost in a game again.
I couldn’t be sure of anything that happened before though. It all seemed so distant. At times I could remember moments clearly, some facts. Like the way I knew I had made honor roll every year in high school, but I couldn’t remember my own name.
There was another memory bubbling to the surface. A classroom, the disheveled professor with wild hair in front of an old school, low tech chalkboard. scribbling by candlelight.
“You see the new immersive reality systems induce a dreamlike state. By prompting particular memories and sense impressions in your brain, it causes you to have a fully immersive virtual reality experience. Now, because you're being fed a constant stream of data, you don't have a lot of control, but you can find your way outside of the program by finding the edges. Find the flaw. The places where the program isn't complete. That is when you will have the most control. Use your attention. The program will have to adapt to your inputs. You can find your way out of the construct once there.”
I stumbled backwards as a horse nearly bumped into me. “Out of the way! Out of the way, boy,” said a guard as he flicked the reins.
Dream, reality, game. Whatever this is, it hurts when I bumped into things. I better at least treat it like it's real for now.
“Okay so let me think,” I said to myself sitting on a barrel blocking a narrow ally. “I have a quest that I need to complete. But there are too many Jackalopes, I have a weapon that I have lost the Skill to use, and have a penalty to learn. Regardless of how I got here, I know what I need. I need backup. There's got to be someplace I can find someone to party up with.” My eyes glance back towards the door to the inn. “No, Argyll is not the kind of person I want to party up with. I need to find someone a little more personable. There's got to be a place to find other people.” So I set out down the street exploring.
I noticed something on every side street seemed to be blocked by a cart or a large bale of hay or some inconveniently placed barrels. It was like I could only go to the Adventurers Guild. Even looking far down the side streets, I could see that hazy fog that meant that that area was close to me. “I guess I can only go to the Adventurers Guild.”
Once again finding myself at the front desk of the Adventurers Guild I asked the clerk, “Excuse me?”
“Ah! Aadventurer, back to turn in any quests? It looks as though you have zero quests complete.”
“Yeah, yeah, no, I haven't finished any quests. I was wondering, is there anywhere where I could find people to party up with; people looking for teams?”
“Of course. The Bulletin Board is right over there, and in the common room over there,” he gestured to an open Archway leading into a room with couches and tables. “You can find other adventurers looking for people to party up with right now. You can form a party and invite new people in your party status menu. If you would instead like to hire mercenaries, they are available in the Mercenary Hall.”
Fog cleared from in front of a door and I could see a large wooden door with torches on the outside and a sign written in red saying, 'Mercenary Hall'.
“As a Premium member, you're eligible to have an AI upgrade to a premium AI with GPP features.
“GPP features?”
“Genuine People Personalities. Guaranteed to pass the Turing test with the six Sigma result. You'll be adventuring with a mercenary with a full blown personality. Just like real friends.”
“Thanks,” I said looking at the attendant out of the corner of my eye. “I guess that's a good thing.”
“Just be aware, though, that the level and power of your mercenary is tied to your own.”
“Good to know.”
I walked over to the common room and found it completely empty. Dozens of couches and comfy chairs sat waiting for someone to fill them. Tables were free from crumbs, spills, and other detritus of unruly patrons. A dart board and pool table stood pristine, no nicks, marks, or pinholes. The only movement was a burly mustachioed NPC polishing pristine glasses behind the bar.
He nodded at me and I nodded back. I shuffled awkwardly to the bulletin board. All the notices on the bulletin board were several days, if not weeks old. It seemed like every group just wanted a healer. “Well that's definitely not my forte,” I said. “Not that I have much of a forte. I guess mercenary it is.”