I was finally fully equipped and, with my new Skills, I set out towards the Abandoned Mine. This was going to be awesome. I was going to have the adventure I had been wanting since I got in this game.
Or was that correct? A part of me still wondered about Kara. Where was she? Should I be looking for her? When I really thought about it, though, what harm could it be to spend a little bit of time enjoying the game? If I got more powerful, that meant that there would be more places I could explore to look for her. Really, when I thought about it, doing some level grinding could only help me find her faster.
And what about Argyle? He seemed so crestfallen when I had decided to keep adventuring. Odd how cheerful he got when we were crafting and how quickly his emotions seem to turn on a dime. He had his subscription now, though. He could craft all day to his heart's content, or go adventuring on his own. I had helped him; he had helped me. What more did I owe him? It just seemed like there was something more going on with him. I couldn't let that bring me down, though. It was time for adventure. And, bonus, if I came back with some gems, we could really do some epic crafting that might make his whole perspective change on things.
Going back to the mines was the right decision. It was the only decision that made sense. Somehow, entering this time, it seemed less ominous, less threatening. As if it knew that I was ready for it. I had acquired the Trap Setting and Detection Skill and so my eyes scanned the path in front of me. Pit traps, dead falls, arrow traps... whatever might be here were all highlighted in my vision. I was able to tiptoe past them.
I traveled maybe two or three minutes before I came across my first rat blocking my path. It snarled and jumped at me, trying to look intimidating. For a moment I froze, remembering the way it had bit at my fingers as I climbed and the sensation of it biting into my legs and arms.
But that was just the hesitation of a moment. I stepped forward, brandishing my new warhammer. With a strong swipe, I took aim for its head.
“You have hit Mine Rat for 38 damage. You have killed Mine Rat.”
It seemed my once-deadly foe had become a lot less dangerous. Moments later, I came across a group of three Mine Rats and before they could even launch an attack I had crushed them all. It wasn’t long until I encountered a group of five that they actually managed to land a blow on me.
“Mine Rat has attacked you for 1 damage.”
Thanks to the modest gains from my armor, apparently this area no longer presented as anything resembling a challenge. It also helped that I had a real weapon, and not an improvised weapon, so gaining level 1 in the Warhammer Skill hopefully wouldn’t be nearly as difficult. Really, how did I go from cowering at the threat of these creatures to now hardly even being threatened by them? That didn't seem fair. Sure, this was only the second dungeon, but it was also overpopulated. Sure, not as overpopulated as the Silverberry meadow, but...
“You do realize that meatbags in this area should have a level of 3 and maybe four Skills at level 4 and two pieces of armor. What’s worst, most don’t even have hats.”
“Then why did I fail the first time?”
“This area is meant for teams. It’s meant to be a social game.”
“Great, with Argyle focused on crafting I’ll probably have to help him out for a week before he’s willing to help out again.”
“Yeah that guy really does love his Gold. Honestly, he has things figured out way better than you do.”
“He doesn’t love Gold; he loves the freedom Gold gives him.”
“I don’t believe you. He didn’t even have a hat before you came along.”
“Why do I even bother?”
As annoying as my fairy companion was, his banter was helping me realize one thing. I was rapidly becoming more competent. Between my ability to see the traps and easily dispatch the rats, clearly this was a space that held no real threats. I was way overpowered for this place. So I strode forward down the mineshaft confidently, exploring all of the various paths leading towards the center of the Abandoned Mine.
Everything was going perfectly according to plan until the Ferret Ninjas attacked. I had stopped scanning my surroundings and paying attention to the shadows. I had gone from paranoid to overconfident and started ignoring the path behind me when suddenly I felt a blaze of hot pain rake across my back.
I turned around to see four hairy figures, humanoid in shape and about four feet tall. Their weasel-like bodies were covered in black fabric. They looked like something between a rat and a snake and a person, but I couldn't exactly make out the fine details of their figures in the darkness. They had clearly snuck up behind me. One had bloody claws a clear sign that it was the culprit for the attack.
“You have been attacked by a Ferret Ninja for 15 damage. Damage partially negated by armor.” I sprang into action, swinging my warhammer at head height towards the ferret’s head.
“You have hit Ferret Ninja for 35 damage.”
I hit it, but it wasn't quite enough. I swung again. This time collapsing it skull.
“You have hit Ferret Ninja for 42 damage. You have killed Ferret Ninja.”
While I was busy dispatching the first one, the next one leapt out at me.
“You have taken 15 damage from Ferret Ninja. Damage partially negated by armor.”
I could probably take a few of these hits, but it wouldn't be long before I’d be having some pretty significant problems. God, I missed that HP regeneration. I brought my hammer around in a long slow arc that connected with the lead ferret’s face. Another notification telling me I had done 38 damage flashed across my vision. At the same time I felt a surge of hot pain, telling me before the prompt even showed up that I had once again been struck, not once but twice. Two of the creatures had decided to attack at the same time.
I swung and found the flaw in my strategy. I swung wide and wild and missed. “Dammit I can’t hit them normally. I need to hit them with a golf swing.” This presented a problem. It meant that they basically needed to be right next to me and I needed to be oriented just right. If they leapt to dodge, I would miss. I needed to imagine whatever I was swinging at was just a ball sitting on a tee.
I visualized; it worked. I connected again, downing the first ferret, then the second, but they were fast and my hammer was slow. This was a problem I couldn't do anything about. Thankfully, I was down to three opponents. As I swung once again, they were able to dash forward, slash at my side, and jump back and away before I could begin to land a blow.
I looked at my health and I looked at my log. I realized this was a stalemate. I couldn't win. For every blow I landed, I took more damage than I gave out. Likely, them fighting to the last ferret would most certainly be the end of me. This was a battle of attrition, and nothing I could do could make my slow warhammer swing any faster. Another swipe launched one of my attackers down the corridor, killing it, but it wasn’t enough. There were two left and my health was nearly gone. I was forced to wonder what Skills I had that could possibly make a difference?
“Oh, wait. Is this when I’m supposed to do something?” Fez’s voice broke through the tension.
“You have been healed for 21 Health.”
“Yes! That’s exactly when you are supposed to do something.”
My hammer swung high and wide, but Fez had made all the difference. I could do this… I could do this. It was almost impossible to set myself up for another attack, to swing down low. However, if I thought, if I took my time setting myself up for a golf swing... My hammer crashed into one black robed bastard, ending its life.
My arc came up high and wide over my shoulder, setting me up perfectly for a downward drive. I activated my Golfing Skill and the last ferret leapt towards me. It was too high. I just couldn’t see it as a golf ball. I couldn’t see my down swing connecting. But is that all there was to golf?
The ferret connected, biting into my hip as I moved.I had a flash back. A memory of a commercial I had seen as a child. A man and a woman swaying back and forth, holding golf clubs. An annoying sing-song, “It’s all in the hips, it’s all in the hips.”
The deadly rodent weasel struck again. My health was down to single digits, but with my whole body joining the motion, my club connected with him, hitting him down the corridor. It wasn’t enough for the kill, but it was enough to reposition my hammer, setting me up to attack him as he ran. I once again set up for a powerful golf swing, this time I focused on thinking of what I was doing as both a golf swing and an attack at the same time. If I concentrated hard, I was sure of this one motion. I knew I could connect.
He leapt. I struck. With a loud crack the charging fur ball was launched back down the corridor,
“You have done 55 damage to Ferret Ninja. You have killed Ferret Ninja.”
I collapsed on the floor, giving myself a moment to breathe and rest. Just for this moment, that was safe. Lying on the ground, I laughed.
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.
I'd done it. I'd taken care of all five of them. I'd handled an impossible combat and come across the other side. “Goddamnit, I wish I'd learned a Healing Skill,” I thought to myself as I lay on the floor. I was victorious and also trapped with my HP recovery rate. I would be here more than an hour before I was back up to full. but what choice do I did I have?
I sat up. I felt the urge to check a phone; the desire to do something, anything to distract myself. Just sitting and recovering seemed somehow under-stimulating after the battle I just survived. For the moment, all I could do was sit and wait. Overwhelmed, I closed my eyes and started listening to my environment.
Some habit that I must have developed at some point during my previous life had me breathing and paying attention to the sensation of my breath. I felt as much as I knew this was a meditation practice. Where had I learned it? I couldn't say. Clearly it was part of my life before joining the game. I had some vague memory of a therapist’s office. Of learning to breathe and follow my breath. Of practicing on my own and learning how to follow my breath without judgment. Clearly, part of me had done this before.
Horrendous, endless minutes became a calm presence, noticing my breath. Skill gained Meditation. The prompt passed across my consciousness, but did not disturb me from my breathing. Whatever passed through my awareness. Here and gone, arising, unfolding, and dissipating. Just like a breath. After a time, maybe a minute, maybe an hour, I fell in to a relaxed, even rhythm.
“Oh, that’s probably my cue.”
“You have been healed for 30 damage. You have been healed for 23 damage.”
“Fez, you couldn’t have done that earlier?” I asked as I received prompt.
“You have gained the Skill Meditation. Level 1: Novice. You have learned to calm the storm of your mind and focus on one thing. This Skill increases recovery of Mana when active and increases your resistance to psychic attack and other mind control effects.”
“Not a terrible way to pass the time,” I thought.
What was clear was that I needed to take a different approach when fighting. It wouldn't do to take so much damage. Clearly I needed to be more strategic with how I fought. I needed to be more aware of my surroundings as I pushed forward. As I continued on and I encountered more ferrets, I realized that one, two, or even three didn't present much difficulty. I could easily engage them in a fight of attrition and dispatch them quickly. But the more that I encountered, the harder it was to break through. This was a problem I didn't have with the rats. The rats were always low to the ground and small. It didn't take much imagination to envision each one as a kind of golf ball for me to attack. The ferret’s could jump and dodge. I had to concentrate on seeing them as something that I could attack with my Skill.
When they ducked low, I was in the right position. I could activate Golfing and hit them for nearly their full health bar. On the one hand, this seemed like I was making amazing progress in learning just how to attack and defeat the agile critters. I was starting to really understandhow my understanding of the Skill affected its use. If I couldn't visualize something as a golf ball, I couldn't activate the Skill. It was like the game logic was just too rigid and wouldn't let me bend that rule. However, if I could wrap my brain around how the target was golf ball like, or how my movement was golf swing like, then the system would bend, with deadly results.
I mused on this until I came across another encounter, this time of seven of the black-clad attack ferrets. They came out of nowhere from the darkness. I had difficulty in even registering how many there were at first. The illumination in the mine was very poor. I could only see shapeless blobs of darker darkness, coming out of nowhere. Shapeless blobs rolling towards me.
As I swung I visualized each blob as its own little sphere, pitted and bumpy. Golf ball. I took a deep breath and imagined swinging a giant golf club at a giant golf ball and something clicked in my head.
“You have hit Ninja Ferret for 55 damage. You have hit Ninja Ferret for 55 damage.”
An overextended swing became the setup for a perfect drive down the fairway. And the dark shape trying to duck its way under my guard became a golf ball, ready for me to swing and launch in the opposite direction.
If I didn't mind what way I was launching these almost golf balls, all of a sudden a swing to the left became a setup for a swing to the right.
Once the warhammer was above my head, I could imagine I was in the right position to swing down in a long, deep arc to launch the ferret against the side of the cave wall. “You have defeated Ninja Ferret, times seven. Level up! You are now level 8. +2 to all Stats. You have gained the Skill Darkvision. Bonuses to Perception and Awareness Skills in dark places. You have learned to embrace the darkness without, which is now less terrifying than the darkness within.”
“Well, that sure is gonna come in handy.” From each of these Ninja Ferret I was able to loot pelts and claws. Some had small little trinkets that would hopefully be able to be added to my crafting recipes. Even though currently I could only make basic hats and wire tiaras and basic wire rings, hopefully soon I'd be able to make more impressive things and improve my crafting Skills so I could help Argyle. The other bonus of the Darkvision Skill is that it also meshed with my Prospecting Skill and I would be able to see more veins of ore.
On the way in I had seen several copper veins and a few iron veins. I had been told by Argyle that these were hardly worth putting the effort in to mine, especially if it would put me in danger. The idiocy of my first time in the mind had been to strike at any old vein. I needed to wait until I found something worthwhile and keep my surroundings in mind. I had to think about where an attack could come from and keep my eyes pealed. Before long, I saw the perfect opportunity.
There it was: a Quartz geode lodged in the wall, down a small cul-de-sac. Now, Quartz was a very low level gem, but it wouldn't take long to harvest. One of the reasons I had specifically chosen a war hammer and one with a pointed tip on one side is that, well, it wasn't exactly a pickaxe, but it could do the job.
I dislodged the quartz geode from the vein. The loud clatter attracted a evil looking shape from the darkness. Thankfully, I didn’t have to worry about being surrounded and I could focus on visualizing and timing. My Warhammer connected with its chest launching it down the hallway and ending its life.
“You're really getting good at that, Boss.”
“I know,” I said.
“Like, scarily good at that. It's like you've practiced killing furry creatures in some other life.”
“I mean, part of me feels like I used to play video games quite often. Yeah. So, it just sort of feels natural that in a space like this I should be killing random mobs.”
“All right, well, it just seems odd that you're so ready to kill. Oh, I mean, like, how is it that you're more okay with killing these furry creatures than you are with turning their pelts into hats? I mean, hats are at least useful for something. All you're getting out of this is experience.”
“Well, yeah, the point of a game like this is to build up experience and gain levels and then kill bigger monsters.”
“Right. Aha. What's that worth to you? Like, can you turn that experience into hats?”
“No, but the higher level I get, the bigger the monsters I can fight. Bigger monsters means more Gold, more Gold means I could afford better things, including hats.”
“Hats. Oh, well, that makes sense.” Leave it to Fez to reduce everything to what kind of hats I could buy at the end.
“I'm kind of surprised. I would think that you would be trying to encourage me to adventure. To go off and do things, but you all you seem to care about is just, 'Will it get me hats?'”
“Nah, that's not all I care about. I also care about you spending Gold and Emeralds. Especially those Emeralds. You know, the more of those you spend on hats, the better off I am.”
“Really? What does it get you for me to spend Gold and Emeralds?”
“Well, you see Gold and Emeralds are transferred to the system.”
“Yeah.”
“And you've got hats.”
“Yeah.”
“And well,” he seemed to pause there. “It’s just what I'm supposed to do. It's... it's my Functions. I sell you hats. You spend Gold and Emeralds. Everyone is happy. I've done what I'm supposed to do.”
“What about when I buy hats from the shop?”
“Oh, yeah, that's really awesome. You are awesome. You do so well. Keep on buying hats.”
“But when I buy hats from the shop, the Gold goes to you. And because you're my companion, they come right back to me. So I have the same number of Gold. And none of them go to the system.
“What do you mean none of them go to the system? You've spent Gold. They come to me. You have hats. I have Gold.”
“But then I have Gold.”
“I don't follow you. I'm doing what I'm supposed to do. Selling you hats. You have hats. I have Gold. End of story.”
“Not 'End of story'. I have hats. You have Gold. I have Gold. I still have Gold.“
“So… So...” I felt that there was something I just couldn't explain to Fez. He should care where the Gold went after they transferred out of his possession. But he just couldn't seem to care. Like once he had gotten the Gold and transferred them, that was the end of the story.
How had he managed to get me off of the idea of continuing to adventure and towards the idea of money and hats? I couldn't really understand. But somehow here we were, arguing the finer points of in-game sales and how AI’s felt about them.
Abruptly, like a switch being flipped, I knew that all I had to do was continue on. It was a real drive inside of my chest. I needed to adventure. I was here to adventure. “Let's keep going. Wait a minute. Was that the system driving me on?”
“You have resisted Mental Influence.”
Oh, no. It was the system driving me on here. I was in a dungeon, putting myself in harm's way when it was just the system trying to convince me to continue.
Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap. I was in the middle of a dungeon. I didn't need to be in a dungeon. I shouldn't be in a game at all. What If my family knew? What was any of this getting me? Where was I going? I was starting to panic. I could feel my heart racing. My chest raised and fell. I felt a wave of calm somewhere in the back of my mind. I registered that I had failed in Mental Resistance check. But it didn't matter. I was calm and ready to keep going.
I took a deep breath, smelling the dank cave like it was spring flowers. I picked up my hammer and, with a spring in my step, continued along down the mineshaft corridor.
The prompt “You have failed to resist Mental Influence,” sat unacknowledged in the corner of my vision.
I had been making good time fighting my way through the mine. I couldn't be sure, but it felt like it was still late morning or perhaps early afternoon. The mine seemed to have many branches and dead ends, that I found myself doubling back often. Generally, the path trended downwards. Along the way I had continued to make excellent progress fighting ferrets and rats, and even the occasional bat. I occasionally collected a few more quartz crystals and some metal ore.
The way I'd been following seem to get tighter and more gravelly. At times it even became difficult to prevent myself from sliding down the path in front of me. After one stumble, I nearly fell flat on my face.
“Careful there buddy. You don't want to fall and lose your life or, worse, your hat.” It was touching that he was trying to care, but in true Fez fashion it was clear what his real concerns were. “And besides, if you bite it, who's going to buy more hats?”
“Oh, I'm sure if you asked Argyle real nicely he might buy a hat or two.”
“Yeah, right that guy's gonna spend every last cent he has on his membership and when all is said and done, he's not going to leave anything left for what's important. A nice, stylish Stetson.”
The image of my Dwarven friend in a cowboy hat had me chuckling so much that I missed a step and found myself falling onto my behind. I rolled down the corridor in a small avalanche of rocks and pebbles. I tried to slow myself by digging in my heals. Sadly, it seemed that the further I went, the more rocks and detritus were swept along with me. It became impossible to find a stable spot of ground that wasn’t already moving.
I must have rolled maybe 200 feet before the floor gave out beneath me. I fell gracelessly down a deep mineshaft, along with my entire avalanche. I heard the splashing stones before I hit ice cold water. This was good, because apparently falling into water meant that I didn't take any fall damage. This was bad because I hadn't had the forethought to catch a breath. I was forced to stay under for a long, long minute, waiting for all of the stones to finish falling down around me. To make matters worse, when my head finally broke the surface of the water the only thing I could see was total blackness, pierced by two gigantic, glowing red eyes.