“What about Percy?” Wendy asked. “You were supposed to tell him what was going on!”

“Nice try,” Bert smirked. “You just want to run off with the Express for a bit.”

“Percy knew we would only come back to warn them of danger,” Bell said from her perch on his shoulder.

“This is such bollocks!” Wendy said. “I am perfectly capable!”

“You're not even a month old!” Bert snapped. “You are not going running off anywhere until you’re at least… sixteen.”

“Sixteen months!” Wendy snarled.

“Years,” Bert corrected.

“Mom!” Wendy was really desperate if she was turning to Bell for help.

“What?” Bell asked innocently.

“Bell?” Bert sighed. “What is it?”

“She’s technically fully grown,” Bell grumbled. “All pixies are born fully… grown.”

“Bullshit!” Bert laughed.

“Dad! It’s true!” Wendy protested.

“Give us a sec,” Bell waved Wendy away.

Bert continued to grumble, having a horrible feeling he was about to lose another argument.

“You don’t want her to go,” Bell stated flatly. “But she is not going to get any older without experience.” She slapped a hand over his mouth as he went to argue. “I know you want her safe, but… if we don’t let her go, she’ll just run off, and we’ll end up chasing her all over the place.”

“You reckon?” Bert asked reluctantly.

“She’s our daughter.” Bell laughed.

“I still don’t like it.” Bert grumped.

“Welcome to being a parent to a Fae,” Bell chuckled. “It will get so much worse!”

“We could go with her.” Bert pointed out.

“It won’t work.” Bell sighed. “If we go this way, she’ll go the other way.” She moved to hover in front of his face. “There is nothing back there that can hurt the Express. If they get in trouble, they just jump in and flatten it.”

Bert drummed his fingers on the table.

“The tics are back that way,” He pointed out.

“The Express can drive straight through; the things will never have a chance,” Bell said, shivering at the memories.

“She’s not going alone,” Bert demanded.

“Agreed,” Bell nodded.

“If she’s not back soon, we go and find her.” Bert gave up. Bell was right. Bert was her father only by accident. He had no control over her except what she agreed to give him.

He still didn’t like it. Accident or not, he felt like her father.

Two hours later, he was watching an ecstatic Wendy stuffing supplies into the Express. So far, she had recruited Scruff and Tim to go with her. Bert would have been happier if she had taken Bud with her, but she said she didn’t want someone telling her what to do.

Kids. It was a bunch of kids.

He really didn’t like this idea.

“You don’t want them to go?” Tru’nal said as she wandered up.

“No. I don’t,” Bert said simply.

“It is always the same,” Tru’nal said gently. “Orc parents feel the same when their young first leave.” She nodded. “We call it the ‘First Tempering,’ a tradition of our people.”

“How did yours go?” Bert asked.

“We ended up captured by goblins,” She laughed. “But now we are here and have met the Fae.”

“Not reassuring,” Bert raised his eyebrows.

“We snuck away,” She shrugged, “We had no armor, no gear, and no idea where we were going.” Tru’nal pointed at the Express. “That alone could conquer a small country,” She pointed at Scruff, “And she fought off thousands in the grasslands.” Finally, she looked him direct in the eye, “And she knows that if anything happens, her father will save her.” She hooked a thumb over her shoulder, “If her mother hasn’t already done it.”

“True,” Bert laughed.

“They will be fine,” Tru’nal nodded and walked away again.

Bert found he was actually feeling better for the interaction. Tru was right. If there was anything that she couldn’t handle, the Express could.

What is more, she was the Express in a way. There are few problems in a medieval world that could not be solved with a few tonnes of rolling steel.

Even if you take into account the magic elements, there is little that could hurt the Express.

He still didn’t like it, but at least he felt they would be safe.

“Wendy, Scruff? A word, please,” Bert called. The two young women came over, still vibrating with excitement.

“Be careful,” Bert said sternly, “There shouldn’t be anything out there you can’t handle,” He ignored the grins and carried on, “But! If anything looks even slightly suspicious, or you think anyone is trying to fuck with you…”

“Get away quick,” Wendy said, rolling her eyes. “I know, Dad.”

“No,” Bert shook his head. “Kill it, and kill it permanently.”

Scruff’s grin was the stuff nightmares are made of, “Really?”

“Shoot first, ask questions later?” Wendy said doubtfully.

“Shoot first, shoot second, reverse over the corpse, and fuck questions,” Bert said sternly. “You are my family, all of you. If something strikes you as off, just kill it and then leave.”

“Wow, Okay,” Wendy said, surprised.

“We can do that,” Scruff nodded seriously.

“Promise?” Bert asked.

“Promise!” Both girls said.

“Fnargle!” Tim added.

“Then go say goodbye to your mother,” Bert said.

They all ran off.

Bert rested a hand on the Express, telling himself it would see them through anything.

===============

Bell slumped in her chair in the Control Tower and watched Bert pace as the Express moved further and further away.

“They will be able to find us again, right?” Bert asked.

“Of course,” Bell said. “She can sense where we are just like we can sense her.”

“We can?” Bert asked, confused.

“Haven’t you tried?” Bell giggled. “You’re such a shitty Fae.”

Support the author by searching for the original publication of this novel.

“Piss off; no one told me I could do that,” Bert grumbled. He turned his back on the window and closed his eyes. He mentally reached out to Wendy… and knew where she was.

That was cool.

“Okay, so what shall we do then?” Bert asked.

“What do you mean?” Bell asked in surprise. “I assumed you’d just keep us here the whole time they were away.”

“Not likely,” Bert grinned. “We tend to draw attention. By the time she got back, we would have done something to get heat on us again.”

“So, we go on then?” Bell perked up.

“That’s the plan.” Bert nodded. “We head out past the City of the Sun and into the plains.” He felt real excitement. It was time to go exploring again.

“City of the Fae,” Bell corrected.

“I thought the Court all left?” Bert said.

“Not all, and more will come over the next few weeks,” Bell said in a bored tone.

“Whatever,” Bert shrugged. “That’s their thing; they can do what they like.”

“So are you going to tell me, then?” Bell said in a careful tone.

“What?” Bert asked, wondering what he had forgotten.

“The Lord and Lady of the Court of the Autumn Wind spoke to you just before they left!” She snapped. “They must have wanted something!”

“Oh, that?” Bert said at a loss. “They just asked me to head out and explore and to keep an eye out for Fae in trouble.”

“That’s it?” Bell asked doubtfully.

“Yeah, there is apparently something out there worth seeing, and we’ll know it when we see it.” He shrugged.

“So a Noble asked you to do something, and you said yes?” Bell giggled. “Who are you, and what have you done with Bert?”

“I know, but they’re different,” Bert shrugged.

“Right?” Bell said. “Just don’t forget, they don’t fuck around. Piss them off… and we are all dead.”

“I said yes, didn’t I?” Bert chuckled.

“So, shall we?” She said excitedly.

“Let's boogie!” Bert grinned back at her.

The huge vehicle began to lumber forward once more, rolling around the outside of the City of the Fae. They began to see the first changes as they went by. The Walls were slowly repairing themselves as Fae hovered in front of them, hands held out and mana flowing like a river from the ocean.

Clearing the city, the plains spread out before them. Gone were the narrow stretches of open ground between mountains and forests. In their place was a vast, green land that stretched to the horizon. Softly rolling hills and clumps of trees interspersed with rivers and lakes made for a much more pleasant view than the Deadlands.

And the change was visible in other areas as well. For a start, the plains were not empty. Herds of deer and something resembling a roided-out buffalo with large armored plates moved in the distance. There were even a few flocks of birds wheeling through the skies.

Bert and Bell enjoyed the view in silence for a while, but…

“Bert?” Bell asked carefully.

“Yes, Bell?” Bert answered.

“Are you okay?” Bell’s voice was unusually soft, “With Gwen leaving and everything?”

“No, not really,” Bert huffed. “But it is what it is. I will be okay; it’s just gonna take a minute.”

Another period of silence as they rolled slowly over the plains.

“How come you didn’t go with her?” Bell blurted in the end.

“I told you why,” Bert said quietly.

“Bullshit!” Bell’s reserve of subtle had run out. “You don’t give in that easily!”

Bert thought for a moment.

“Bell, if I said I wanted to turn around and go, I don’t know… anywhere? Like another world or something, and I wanted you and Way Way to come with me… would you?” Bert asked quietly.

“Yeah, but we can’t,” Bell said immediately. “Unless you know how? Where are we going?”

“We’re not,” Bert laughed. “I just meant that if I wanted to go, you would go with me. As would Way Way and just about everyone on the Waystation.”

“So, you feel bad you didn’t do that for Gwen?” Bell sighed.

“She didn’t ask, Bell,” Bert said simply.

“Oh,” Bell said.

“Gwen had her plans worked out before she got here,” Bert shrugged. “She’s my everything, but she hadn’t planned on me going with her.”

“Ouch,” Bell winced.

“So I had a choice Bell,” Bert went on. “I could go with her or stay with you all.” He frowned. “You want me with you; she didn’t. I chose the people who chose me, simple.”

“Sorry,” Bell said.

“Thanks,” Bert sighed.

“Bert?” She called again.

“Yes, Bell?” He said.

“I’m glad you stayed,” She giggled. “But, just so we are very clear, I’m not sleeping with you.”

“Bell!” He laughed.

The Waystation rolled across the plains, leaving the newly renamed City of the Fae behind them. The giant treads churned the earth below them as they wound back and forth at random, searching for anything of interest.

After the first day, they started to see the first signs of a distant civilization. It was not much at first. A stone bridge over a river or signs of where a road used to be, but the lands around them slowly started to move from the truly wild to the slightly pastoral look that is common on the very edges of a town or city.

It was a nice break for everyone on board to have a few days of peace and quiet after the chaos of the Grasslands, the Gods, and the Fae.

They even got time to do a little hunting and refill their stores…

===========

Bert rolled aside as the great beast charged by him, a colossal hoof missing him by inches as he leaped aside. These Armored Bison promised a delicious supply of steaks, and he just knew they would make great Tacos.

It bellowed in rage as one of Bud’s arrows found its neck. Hot blood pumped out of the wound, but not enough.

Bert ran at the animal as it charged, his shield held out in front of him as his prosthetic hand changed into a sword blade. At the last second, just as the beast lowered its head to gore him with its horns, Bert leaped into the air, twisting and rolling to bring him down on the massive, muscled back of the creature.

His sword stabbed deep into the neck muscles as he kept his momentum. The creature bucked, sending him flying free before he could kill it.

Rolling upright, he was sent flying as it charged into him. It was like getting hit by a freight train. His shoulder pads saved his shoulder, but he felt at least three ribs go.

It turned again, arrows bristling from its neck, and glowered at him. Pawing the ground and snorting, it prepared to charge again.

An arrow found its mark, piercing the eye and directly into the brain.

It charged anyway.

“What the FUCK!” Bert yelled as he dove aside again.

Bud looked at his bow as if he couldn’t quite believe it.

Bert charged the creature before it could complete its turn, driving the full power of his shield charge into its flank. Bones crunched beneath his shield before he was kicked away.

Bert’s shield spun away as his arm broke.

“Fuck this!” Bert growled, dropping into the tides and letting his mana flow. His hand changed into an axe, which he pumped mana into. An outline of the blade, three times the size of the original, glowed in the air.

The creature charged again; Bert cast a Turn rune on the ground beneath its feet, sending it tumbling. It slid to a stop next to him, and he swung the axe, neatly beheading the creature.

He was walking away when he heard it move again.

“Boss!” Bud warned.

Bert spun, seeing the massive creature struggling to its feet. Snarling, Bert slammed his axe into it again.

Still, it moved.

He had to cut almost halfway through the beast's chest before it finally stilled.

“What kind of fucked up creature keeps its brain in the chest?” He panted.

There was a giggle.

“You lost!” Bell cheered.

“Oh, come on!” Bert complained, “How was I supposed to know it could take all that?” They had made a bet, one he had lost when he had to use mana to kill one.

Bell just giggled from her spot on top of Slothy. The Giant Sloth Bear had been fascinated by the beasts and begged for a hunt.

One thing had led to another, and now they were all screwed.

“I still won!” She laughed at the blood-drenched Bert as he cast Reclaim Flesh to repair the broken bones.

“I’m going to go find my shield,” Bert sighed.

“Sore loser!” Bell laughed.

“Yeah, yeah!” Bert said. “I still think you knew.”

“Well, of course, I did!” Bell laughed. “Who cares? You lost, and I get to drive for the next WEEK!”

=============

“Do you have to get every last one of them?” Bert groaned as the latest victim of Bell’s driving screamed as it died. She had chased a herd of the Armored Bison into a gap between two large hills and was now driving them down, the giant mandibles on the front of the Waystation harvesting dozens at a time.

“I don’t have to,” She chuckled.

“Bell, stop!” Bert called.

“Don’t be such a crybaby.” She huffed. “I’m only doing the one herd!”

“Bell!” Bert snapped, his eyes fixed on the horizon. “Smoke.”

“Ooh, where?” Bell flew over to look. “Wow, a lot of smoke.” She sighed, “Fine, we’ll go see.” She cast a regretful look at the couple of hundred Armored Bison that was all that remained of the large herd. “But if we run out of steak, I’m blaming you!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Bert grinned.

They found the road long before they reached the smoke. It was a poor excuse for a road, just flattened earth that had been tread clear of grass. Bell followed along it, not bothering to avoid it as the Waystation could straddle the entire road comfortably.

The smoke, when they got a little closer, was coming from the remains of a village. It had not been much to start with, but there was nothing left now. The whole thing must have been constructed from wood.

A large group of armored knights on horseback wheeled at the approach of the Waystation and rode away.

“I have a funny feeling we’ll see them again.” Bell laughed. “I hope they have a better attitude than the last lot.”

“Wouldn’t bet on it,” Bert grimaced.

“You sure about that?” Bell asked archly. “Double or nothing?”

“No thanks,” Bert smiled sweetly at her.

“Pussy!” She laughed.

“No thanks,” He laughed.

Their laughter died as they began to find the bodies. They lay beside or sometimes on the roadway. Hoof prints marked the passage of the knights. It looked like about the same time the people died, funny that.

They continued to follow the road, seeing more smoke on the horizon. The road eventually forked, and the bodies of the dead kept going to the left fork while a trail of discarded items marked the right.

“Well?” Bell asked.

“Go right,” Bert said. “The ones on the left, we are probably too late to help anyway.”

“Also, anything good was already taken,” Bell shrugged.

Bert gave her a look.

“What?” She giggled. “They’re dead; they won’t complain.”

“The ones on this road might not be,” Bert said.

“Yet,” Bell cackled.

“Fuck sake, Bell!” Bert groaned.