The Vespidian
Arc 8 Superficial
Chapter 7
“Remember, be here by seven in the morning,” that was what Mom had said when I was finally allowed to leave yesterday. I had not really slept well last night, tossing and turning. Stomach pains and cold sweat plagued my normally sound sleep. This was the sort of thing I felt while being tortured and imprisoned by Molotov. I was dead tired and according to my suit’s clock, I was already late since it was past seven. Not a good start to my sponsorship career.
There was no time to do my routine, no time for weights or shower or anything really. I stumbled out of the bed, not even bothering to make it. I slapped myself a few times to knock the sleepiness away, pain was a good incentive to not try and go back to sleep. Now that my jimmies were thoroughly rustled, I got myself into the suit and away I went. Somehow I was getting that cliche image of a schoolgirl with toast in her mouth, running to school. Oh please let me run into the man of my dreams… like that will ever happen. Ah, shit I am going to be super late.
I rushed down the corridor to the elevator. Damn it, why is this shit on the second floor? I peered at the glowing number, 7. Yeah, I don’t got time for this. I opened the stairwell to the side and darted down, definitely less time than waiting for that stupid elevator. The main floor bustled about with people visiting the Fire Station and the varied personnel running about doing their jobs. I weaved my way through the crowd as quickly as I could without knocking people over or stepping on people. Luckily, since I was so tall people tended to move out of the way when they saw me coming, but of course, there were those who were not looking and they had to be sidestepped.
Finally, I managed to get out the door and got to a spot where nobody was in close proximity. My wings spread and my jet fired up setting me free from the constraints of the streets. Was it a brisk morning, not sure the suit has an interior climate. I stared down at the bumper to bumper traffic and swarms of people the size of insects below. Good thing I can fly. I would have had to wake up at like five to get there on time otherwise. Not that I will be there on time anyway.
I had never really noticed how big the City Central Hero League Station was. It took up about four blocks and towered a good fifty stories at the highest peak in the middle. Though it was not the tallest building in the city it was certainly the most imposing. Just looking at it made me think twice about doing something wrong. Of course, this might have to with the quarantine and being held in the underbelly of that place for two months. Makes me wonder how the Villains are not scared of doing stuff just from looking at it, clearly, it must be that they have not been on the receiving end of harsh punishments just yet.
I diverted my eyes to the northwestern part of the city. Uptown, or fancy land as I tended to refer to it. Right smack dab in the middle of the place was Star Agency. One might even say that Uptown was built around Star Agency on the account of all the rich and famous people buying land and building their mansions in close proximity to the place. There were also business giants in the area. I didn’t know too much about these, but I did know their names. Granted, it would be hard not to when they have giant signs on the fronts of their skyscrapers. There were two which were bigger than the others, Chronic Tonic and Tesla Incorporated, or CT and TI respectively.
Chronic Tonic made makeup and pharmaceuticals. There were a few rumors about performance enhancing drugs, but honestly, I don’t think it really matters even if they did exist. It was not like they could make a civi be able to stand up to a Super in terms of ability. I mean a rank 1 was slightly less strong than the strongest non super in the world. It was more of athletes getting doped before games to boost their stats. There was a bit of controversy over that in Baseball, also using nonregulation bats. It was not sportsmanlike, but to be fair, I can understand the want and desire to be stronger. Otherwise, I would not be hitting the gym in my off hours or at the crack of dawn on normal days.
As for Tesla Incorporated, well I got no clue. From the name I can easily assume it has to do with power in some way or in all likelihood it is related to Dr. Tesla in some way. Somehow though that was just too obvious, like screaming to the world that it was just a business front to a Super Villain. If it was related then it would have been shut down already and Dr. Tesla should have been caught, seeing as how he has not been I think it is safe to say my concerns are unfounded.
Damn my short attention span! I am late already, now is not the time to idly be thinking about things which have nothing to do with me.
I banked down towards the entrance landing near the steps. Not sure why, but there was this congregated mass of people just kinda loafing around out here. They perked up at the sight of me, gracefully appearing from the sky. I got one step before the swarm had encircled me, waving microphones in my face or as high as they could reach and snapping photos, while berating me with questions. It was confusing and disorientating, too many voices talking all at once. I am too tired for this shit.
“Mecha Fairy, Mecha Fairy! Care to answer a question? What brings you here?”
“Eh, I got a sponsorship.”
“Who sponsored you?!”
I was about to reply when I saw out of the corner of my eye Mom and she looked like she was about to murder somebody. Oh Jesus, not me! Take him, I didn’t do nothin wrong. She had several police officers with her and they were forcing their way to me. Oh no, she has come to finish the job! I bounded out of the circle and landed about ten feet away free and clear. I looked over my shoulder and she was still coming. Fuck that. I ran away. She is just so scary.
I kept running for about three blocks, not too sure was not exactly counting after all. My stomach started to turn itself inside out, from hunger. Oh right, I forgot to eat breakfast. I looked around and I spied my favorite fast food joint, Colonel Chicken. I ducked into the door since it was shorter than I was and walked up to the counter. There was some uniformed guy at the register, he had on a black apron with the chicken bucket logo on it and the little sailor looking hat.
“Can I help you?” he asked, gawking at how tall I was.
I ignored him for a moment, looking over the menu. What sounded good? Well, can’t go wrong with the usual. I looked down at him, “Three, eight piece buckets of fried chicken and a large drink.”
“For here or to go?” he gulped.
“Here.”
He charged it up, “Thirty-six dollars.”
The price has gone up again. Noooo, that used to be only thirty. Grudgingly, I fished about for my credit card in the suit compartments pulled out the shiny gold Hero League Card. It was linked to an account created for my Super Identity. He swiped it and after a moment it beeped. He swiped again and the same thing happened. He scratched his ever more nervous face and handed the card back to me.
“You have cash?” he asked.
What the hell! There should be over twenty thousand dollars in there! I had half a mind to call up Mark and start screaming at him over where the fuck my money was. It was supposed to be twenty thousand up front, not to mention the paid meals. Do I even have cash on me? I started looking through my varied compartments, I found a five, a large ball of lint, and a half munched chocolate bar. These were not things that somebody would want in exchange for my food.
I frowned, to be too poor for a fast food binge. What has this world come to!? I was about to tell him just to forget it when the door burst open and there was Mom, out of breath and looking like she was about to kill over from exhaustion. She looked at me with those cold dead eyes and my skin crawled. Oh god, she is a zombie come back from the grave to haunt me.
My first inclination was to run, but there was nowhere to go unless I wanted to break windows. I don’t got money to pay for breaking things. I stared her down and she fell over on the floor. It seems that I won this battle of wills! You know, if it was anybody else I would have ran on over there to make sure she was ok. I side stepped past her laying there, avoiding looking at her. I didn’t see nothing. This is my only opportunity to escape. Her hand grabbed onto my foot and I screamed. It really is a zombie!
“Where do you think you are going!” she grit out.
“To get help.” I lied, trying to edge my way out the door.
“Why are you running from me?!”
“You scare me!” I yelled back.
She just kinda looked dumbfounded. “I scare you? What? Why?”
“You looked like you were going to kill me earlier.”
She sat up, eyeing me, “Of course I am angry, you are late for work and talking to the press.”
“Talking to the press? They swarmed me. Besides what is wrong about talking to them?”
She sighed, “Those people will ruin your life if they get the chance. They do that just ignore them. How were you late when you can fly?”
I put my fingers together, “I couldn’t really sleep and ended up missing the alarm.”
She rubbed her face a little, “I get it, stage fright and jitters. Just don’t do it again and don’t run from me. It is my job to help you and make sure you do your job. Alright, now enough funny business, we are going back there if I have to drag you.”
I stood up, “I doubt you could if you tried. However, I will go back willingly if you do something for me.”
She looked at me skeptically, “What?”
“Pay for my food,” I said, pointing to the register.
She grumbled and wobbled over there, “How much?”
“Thirty-six dollars.”
She looked back at me and then at him, “What the fuck did she order?”
“Three buckets of chicken and a large drink.”
She had a very sour look on her face, “Make that two large drinks.”
He ran it up and she paid for it. She handed me a cup and then proceeded to fill her cup with a sports drink. After several large gulps, she filled it back full and sat down at one of the booths, looking like she was about to pass out. I filled mine up with lemonade and sat across from her. Her breathing had calmed down a bit now. She must have run as hard as she could to catch up that quickly. I am actually starting to feel a little bad about that.
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Mom stared at me, finally, she said, “Look, I don’t know exactly what you heard about me. Clearly, the orange thing was not all of it. Whatever it is, it doesn’t matter. You are my talent which means I will do everything in my power to make you successful. It is my job to help you, but I can’t help somebody who doesn’t want help. If you are not serious about this then quit now and don’t waste both of our time.”
“I can’t quit. They won’t let me.”
“If you can’t quit, then why not try to enjoy it? Better than being miserable the whole time. Besides, it is not like this line of work is some torture. I read your contract, it took two hours, but I read all of it. I honestly have no clue what you are complaining about, there are so many extra perks stuffed in there I don’t know how you managed to sneak it all under the radar.”
“I have a good lawyer.”
“Well, you must since you managed to get a paid snack break every four hours.”
“Oh, right I forgot about those.”
The guy called out our order and I walked over and picked it up as well as a few condiments, BBQ and ketchup. I set the tray on the table and slumped back down rifling around for a tasty piece of chicken. Mom sat there for a minute or so before snagging a drumstick. I tapped the side of my helmet, opening the mouth section. I crunched down on my succulent and crispy chicken, breaking the bones and chewing them. Naturally, I kept my mouth closed so that she could not see the mandibles.
“Are you wearing a mask under your mask?”
I thought about it. My face is made of a hardened bone, so I suppose my face was something of a facade. Technically, it could be considered a mask. “Yeah, I had a bad run in with Nuclear Knight and his corrosive mist during the sewer mission. Lost my left arm too.”
She directed her eyes to the arm in question, “I am sorry to hear that.”
That actually sounded sincere. I nodded, “Down side of being a Super Hero, you gotta fight Super Villains and in that case mutants.”
“What is the upside?”
“Asking myself that actually. I don’t know if I am cut out for it. It seems like every villain in the city is stronger than me and kicks my ass. I am tired of fighting, I didn’t sign up to fight supers or mutants, I signed up with the rescue team purposely to avoid such things. I just don’t know what I am doing with myself anymore, but it is not like I can just go home and be normal so here I am. Still, I do want to help people. Apparently, doing this is going to do that. A big part of why I took this sponsorship in the first place. Ok, while I am being honest it has more to do with the money. It is expensive to feed me and I am tired of being a leech.”
She didn’t know what to say to that and nibbled at the chicken. I continued eating, sticking large pieces in and snapping them in half while I chewed. After observing me eat a whole bucket and proceed to start on the next she spoke up.
“Were you really going to eat all of this?”
“Yeah.”
“How are you so thin while eating so much junk food?”
“Hyper metabolism. I have to eat at the least five pounds of protein a day. Of course, that is bare minimum. The most I have eaten in a single sitting was fifty pounds of ground beef. I felt pretty fat after that.”
“What happens if you don’t eat?”
“I start to get weak. After three days my muscles will start to cannibalize themselves for the protein reserves and after two weeks I will go into a coma. Granted, most people are dead by that point, so I guess, I am better off than most.”
“How do you-”
“I would rather not talk about it.”
She diverted her eyes, “Fair enough. Well, finish it up so we can go.”
We spent another five minutes there in silence as I finished munching down the second and subsequently what remained of the third. I pat my tummy once it was all consumed, definitely hit the spot. Seeing that I finished she wiped her hands clean and refilled her drink. I did the same, there was a lot of greasy goodness, normally I would lick my fingers, but this was kinda a public place and I have a two-foot long tongue that certainly is not human.
“You ate the bones too.”
“High in calcium and the marrow is pretty nutritious too.”
“You know, you are probably the weirdest person I have ever had to deal with.”
“Is that a bad thing?”
She thought it over, “No, I have dealt with some terrible people in my time and you don’t seem to be so bad. If anything, you are too honest.”
“I don’t think I am honest. This suit and name are all lies to the world to hide who I am.”
“Sometimes white lies are better than telling the truth,” she replied, walking ahead of me.
“How so?”
“Being too honest can hurt someone and those around them even more than lies sometimes.”
I can sort of see that. For instance, if I told her I am Vesper she would lose her shit and probably knife me. So yeah, I guess lying about us not being related at all is beneficial for both of us. This is some sage like advice, must be from experience. I nodded a little as we walked back to Star Agency. This time when we walked by the paparazzi Mom gave them a stare that could kill and they didn’t even attempt to come close. See, I knew she was scary. You have to be to do that to those sorts of people.
We were late, by a good ten minutes thanks to my gluttonous appetite. If I had not run off I actually would have been early since my first appointment started at eight. The entire reason she wanted me to come early was to avoid the vultures as she calls them and to orientate to the surroundings. It also would have been a good impression to be early. Well, I blew that, sorry.
My photo shoot was taking place in a smaller studio room off to the side of the main modeling department. Due to all of the people running around I could tell this place was popular. Just about every room had a lit up sign “Do Not Disturb, In Session” Mine was sadly dark, well not for long.
Mom opened the door and we entered, I had to duck or hit my head. This place was not designed for people of my stature. Ah yes… Mr. Pink swirly hair who wears socks with his flip flops. What was his name again? Well, I am sure that I will hear it at some point, so on with the show. They had a whole beach set up here with sand and a fake background of the ocean expanding off into the distance. There were even palm trees and stuff in here. Wouldn’t it be cheaper just to go to the beach and have it be more authentic?
Come to think of it, I don’t remember ever going to the beach before. Mom and Dad could never really afford to take a vacation other than to like the national park or the zoo and stuff that was local. I wonder what all the excitement is about? Is the ocean, even that cool? It is like a giant lake with salt water right? I don’t really see the appeal of that.
Mom apologized, “Sorry we were late, Mr. Benito. First day jitters.”
He motioned with his hands to come over, “It is fine, it happens to everyone. Still, I would prefer not to wait around. Try to be early for the next shoot.”
I stood over him by a good two feet, staring down at the varied people. Somehow it feels like everybody is just so short, or more likely I am just too damned tall. Off to the side, I saw the thing that they had all of the varied bathing suits I would be modeling in. There was a red one piece that reminded me of Bay Watch, a purple micro bikini that criss crossed creating a diamond shape where my belly was, then there was this two piece that was light blue and had frilly over hanging material, and then a standard black bikini top and bottom. Out of all of them, my favorite would be the frilly one, but that has more to do with my personal preference for cute things.
One of the assistants brought over a large sticker with the BAI logo on it. It got smoothed out just above my boobies. They must have gotten the proportions from somewhere cause it actually fit without looking tacky. Well, I guess it is official now, I have been branded. Where is my money?
“So what is first?”
“We will start out simple, do the red one first.”
I plucked it off of the hanger… I wonder if this is even the right size? It looked a little small. I stretched it and got my legs through, shimmying it up over my front and realized that getting two arms on each side through the strap would be hard. I did it, but just barely. It was tight. Luckily, there was some pretty good stretchy material in this thing. It held together where I thought it would rip. I better just play it safe and not be too crazy with the poses.
He looked at me through the camera, it was a very expensive one. With the wardrobe taken care of, I was herded onto the sand in front of the green screened background. Ocean sounds of waves crashing and seagulls filled the room in an attempt to set the mood. I closed my eyes attempting to imagine me being at the beach, kinda hard when I have never been there.
“Be playful.” He said.
“Like this?” I asked doing the old cat paws in the air and winky face.
He stared at me deadpan for a little bit. Oh boy, this is harder than I thought. It sucks not being able to show my real face. How the fuck am I supposed to display emotion?
He shook his head, “No, no play in the sand.”
Eh, ok. I plopped down on my knees and started poking at the sand. Oh, I can make a sand castle. That is what people do, right? I started shoveling the sand to erect my fortress of solitude that none shall enter, muahahah! I had been too absorbed in my craft to notice, but apparently, we were done with that now. Ah man, I was not even finished yet though. They snapped their fingers to get my attention.
“Alright, I want you to frolic around a little.”
“Frolic? Eh, I can try.”
I thought it over. This would be easier with a partner, cause then I could chase them playfully. At any rate, I tried my best, which turned out not to be good enough. I ended up tripping over my castle, due to how unstable the sand was to prance about on. Everybody sighed. Frolicking is for little girls anyway, so I was not too upset. I am not really cute or anything so doesn’t really fit my image, to begin with.
He clapped his hands, “Alright, that is enough, change to the black one.”
So soon? I barely even wore this thing. Whatever. I tugged at it managing to free my right side and then the left. I put it back on the rack and several of the crew dusted the sand off of me so that it would not interfere with the next article of clothing. This one was a lot easier to get on and I tied the top between my arms. The bottom just slipped up and I gave it a good snap to get out the wrinkles. I stood back out on the sand waiting for my directions.
They wheeled out a banana boat. Ah yes, the banana boat. I stood there, looking it over for a bit, ponderously in fact. They were not saying anything so I kinda just did what I wanted. What would people want to see? I got on the other side of it playfully peeking out and then slunk onto, straddling the giant yellow water toy. If I had a cowboy hat this would turn into a rodeo, but sadly there was not one. I rolled on my side facing the camera. Finally, I lay facing the ceiling in the bow of the banana boat.
I have no clue if I did any of that right, but fuck it, I had fun. I got up and they took that boat away. I was a little disappointed really. I wonder if they would let me have that thing? It would be so fun to ride it down street. It has got wheels so might as well use them. I mean there is that nice hill over by Downtown. It has got that nice slope and everything. There was a moment of silence before I got a big thumbs up from Benito. Seems I did good there. Maybe I am just better with props or something.
He clapped, “Good, good now then put on the purple one.”
I untied the bikini and put it back on the rack. Just as before the sand was swept off of me. I stared at the purple one… how the hell do I even put this thing on? Should I ask for help? I probably should better than looking stupid because I don’t want to be embarrassed. I mean, it is way worse to act like you know something and fuck up than to ask for help.
“I need help with this one.”
One of the girl assistants had me here. I followed what she said and she had to tie it in a few places, but like magic, it fit. It was a rather snug thing if I did say so myself. It rode up my ass and made the front of my suit camel toe even more than it usually did. It is amazing what a borderline piece of dental floss can do. Ok, it is not that thin, but it is barely there. I walked back out, unfortunately, there were no props.
“Alright, we are going sexy here so let’s get this going. Get on all fours facing away from us and look back over your shoulder.”
Well, that is child’s play, sir I did worse for my stream. Come to think of it, I was wearing a helmet then too. I did as I was told and assumed the position. This would be the doggy, my favorite. Too bad I don’t got a partner. I brought my right hand up, putting a finger to where my lips were under the helmet and played coy. He liked that, taking a few pics from different angles. Something tells me the rest of this was a sham and this right here was what the guy had been waiting for the whole time. Well, at the least I am not a cam whore. I mean nothing wrong with pin up models. Somebody has to make this stuff look sexy. I wonder if there is a Hero League calender?
“Now on your side.”
It seems all of that ero is paying off. I rolled onto my side, lifting my leg up in an arch and provocatively placed my lower hands over my metal breasts as though the string had slipped and there was something worth hiding. He loved that circling around to get different angles. Ah yes, paint me like one of your French girls, fufu. At least I think this guy is French… maybe Italian?
For the last part, I did a split, except it was a bit more extreme. A normal person’s legs would have dislocated since mine can literally move in any angle which is how I can crawl on ceilings and walls or running on all sixes for that matter. I thought it was sexy, but everybody went blue in the face and Mom actually screamed running over to me. What? It is not like I just broke my leg or something.
“Holy fuck get a medical stretcher in here!” Yelled Benito.
I realigned everything, standing back up to the shock and awe of just about everybody in the room. I put my hands up trying to calm them down, “It is ok, I am fine. I thought I told you I was really flexible? Besides, I regenerate so if anything did happen, I would be fine after a few hours. I mean hell I can reattach my arms and legs.”
Benito wiped the sweat from his face, “I think we are done for the day.”
“I could keep going though?”
“No, that is fine. Next time. I need to be prepared for this.”
I frowned, “Oh, ok. Sorry for scaring everybody.”
“Please don’t do that,” said Mom.
“But my arms are the same way you know. Outside of the suit, I can roll up into a ball.”
“How about you just try acting normal?”
“But I am not normal.”
“Fair enough… just warn me before hand if you are going to do something like that.”
I nodded, “Ok, sorry.”
Way to go me. I just gotta ruin everything, don’t I.