Arc 7 Healthy Green Glow, Chapter 8
I pat my face, feeling a little fuzzy. There was still the elephant in the room or rather sewer tunnel that had to be addressed, “So, what the hell are we doing with Gnome?”
Neon Nurse looked up from administering a dose of something to the now unconscious Gnome. She said, idly, “I will have to take her up to be confined. For now though, I can carry her and we will finish up this tunnel. It shouldn’t take too long. We will split up at the convergence and you two will meet back up with Catherine and the others.”
“You are leaving us alone down here?”
“Only for a little bit, besides just follow the trail left by the others, you basically can’t get lost.”
“True. Alright, well let’s get to it then.”
Neon Nurse hefted the heavy, metal layered Gnome over a shoulder and her suit slowed as well as noticeably looked shorter due to the weight. Gnome was a rather dense person with that golem around her. We proceeded along, hoses gushing cleaning fluids on everything, especially if it moved and, or gurgled. We came to the end. It had been a rather short trip, only a couple hundred yards of twisting tunnel. Like any sort of magical adventure, there was a boss sitting here at the end. Our old pal, mister skitter, turns out it was a miss skitter and this was her nest.
Bones were piled around this place and some sort of secretion covered the walls. It seemed alive and not in a happy way. Oh no, no, no, not happy at all. I could hear them scuttling and squirming just about everywhere. Those nasty, nasty little legs, igh. Mommy skitter had a sizable family over here, with varying girths and lengths. It was a writhing sea of segmented bodies over in the shadowed corners. They didn’t seem to like light very much, fleeing from our headlamps.
An errant thought crossed my mind. Poor little things were just trying to live down here. Although little might be an understatement with how big these creepy-crawlies were. I could strangely relate. She had been gathering food for her babies. A commendable thing, for a bug. Of course, this might just be my bug conscious weighing in. To be honest, I almost felt bad, I don’t, but I almost do. Destroying a family. Oh well, something I will have to live with I suppose. These are little monsters, after all. If left to their own would likely spill out into the streets and eat children and pets, maybe even adults, they do get big enough and have poisonous fangs after all.
Hmm, when I put it that way this isn’t hard at all. It is more of a matter of protecting our citizens. I wonder why I was attributing human-like morals to these unsightly beasts? Truly must be the bug in me. I never would have even second guessed this before. It could be the children. I do have a bit of qualms about murdering babies, no matter what sort of critter it is. This is what I get for naming the damned thing. Guess I gotta put her down like old yeller, before she can get up to no good.
We readied ourselves to fight the mass of legs. The walls and ceiling were thoroughly soaked with the Rad-Gone. They had nowhere to run and those that did quickly dived into the suds, writhing in pain before curling up and dying. They drowned in the foam. All of us steadily advanced ever closing in on the big one. She had coiled up to protect her young and we hosed them down. The shrieks and clacking of claws soon fell below the fizzing of the suds.
Miss Skitter rose up like a great snake from the water, screeching in what I could only assume was a mix of agony and rage. It had caught me off guard since she had been so quiet before. I should have known that this wouldn’t end without a fight. She scurried faster than I predicted and latched onto my leg, ripping it out from under me. You conniving little! Any remorse I may have felt for the beast was instantly replaced by anger. My fist slammed down on her head, cracking open the carapace. She coiled desperately around my frame to stop the attack, however, since I am much stronger this only make her more vulnerable.
I yanked and the bottom two arms tore at the segmented body. They popped off like Lincoln Logs with legs. Soon I had ripped and mangled her body clear down to the head, which was firmly latched onto my leg. It must be held on there through sheer rage alone. The gooey brain was exposed from where my fist had broken through. A strange impulse, a child-like fascination rose. I poked the brain and caused varied twitches and spasming to ensue from the now screaming creature. How delightful. My fingers wiggled and worked their way through gray matter. It is surprising how large the brain was, must be the size of a dog’s, if I had to guess. Not like I have ever seen a dog’s brain so I can’t definitively say.
Makes me wonder, is it intelligent? Does it comprehend death or perhaps could it have been tamed and taught tricks? Such a shame to kill it. Is this how Dr. Arbor felt digging through my head? This superiority, this, this control. I can sort of see how she gets off on it. I always did like a little S&M. It feels like I got a bit off topic here. How horrifying, I was actually relating to Dr. Arbor. The world must be coming to an end.
Realizing that what I was doing was a bit sadistic I ended the suffering, by snapping the head in half. The mandible fell away into the waters with a plop and the giant centipede was no more. Something is wrong with me, maybe not though. These are just bugs and it is not as though I was ever particularly fond of them to begin with. I guess it is similar to burning ants with a magnifying glass. Or dissecting a frog in biology class. It is just an animal I don’t get why this is bothering me so much.
I stamped on the cluster of eggs smooshing them below my metal heels. Less of these things the better. Just cause I am a wasp doesn’t mean that I need to be the champion of insect kind. If anything I need to weed out the trouble makers or else it will give me a bad name. This reminded me of some research I had been doing recently. I was a little curious to see which type of wasp I was related to most closely. The closest matching my physical features would be the Pepsis or more commonly known, the Tarantula Hawk. I had all the colorations, orange, almost red wings, black and velvety blue carapace, hooked claw toes, paralytic venom, and of course the giant abdomen.
However, that would be about all that we had in common. Adult Tarantula Hawks don’t eat meat, they are actually nectarivorous, which is a fancy way of saying they are like butterflies and drink nectar. The larva are, well, they are parasitic. It is actually insidious how they devour the prey from the inside, while avoiding major organs to keep the host alive as long as possible. Yet another reason I fear what might happen once I get around to breeding. I know for a fact that I am carnivorous, which means my children will be too.
The last thing I want is some chest burster shit going down. It might just be all the movies I watch, but I am a bit paranoid about these things. I mean a face full of alien wing-wang is one thing, but being impregnated with flesh eating monsters that devour your body and use it as a nest is another. Well, sorry, Dad. I would rather chop off my ovi than subject somebody to that. Although, how much of Neon Nurse is flesh and blood at this point? She really might be the perfect candidate. If anything went horribly awry, then I am sure she could deal with it.
I stared at her in a new light. The robo maniac wasn’t so bad. My roving eyes assessed her. Hmmm. I can’t see much with that suit on. If she hasn’t changed from last time she was flaunting about naked, then it is a rather nice body. At the least, her face isn’t ugly, plastic and creepy maybe, but I guess I could just imagine it being from an anime or something. That might make it worse. It just ain’t natural. I could always put a paper bag over her head or do her from behind.
“Neon Nurse, how much of you is mechanical?”
She paused from spraying the walls for a moment, looks like we are just about done here. “Mechanical? That is mostly just joints and power relay system. However, if you are talking synthetic then the vast majority of my body is made of my special polycarbonate resin. It is roughly ten times as efficient as the normal stuff since I make it from a secret blend. It is also extremely durable. What brought up this inquiry?”
I shiftily looked away, “No reason really.”
She chuckled a little, “Are my charms finally getting to you?”
“No.”
“Oh, Vesper. No need to be so coy. All you have to do is ask. Besides, your organic components betray you. I see those elevated hormones and heart rates.”
I looked down, “That is cheating.”
“All is fair in love and war my dear. So, how about we arrange an exploration after this sewer business is resolved? I know you enjoy my toys, so don’t act so weird. Besides, it is not healthy to restrain yourself too much.”
“Exploration? What are you going to probe me again?”
“If that is what you desire. As much as I would enjoy discussing this, we really should not be dragging our feet,” said Neon Nurse, turning her hose back on.
I nodded reluctantly and followed suit. The remnants of the creatures were drowned in toxic cleaning fluids. Their desperate thrashes soon quieted and the waters stilled all around. The only movement was the sludge and foam dripping down the walls. We turned setting off back where we had come from.
“So, I have been wondering.”
“Yes?” replied Neon Nurse.
“Why don’t we just pump the Rad-Gone through the sewers instead of actually coming down here?”
Neon Nurse nodded, “Oh, that. Well, simple really. We have tried that before. It doesn’t get all of the tunnels, nor the ceiling and it certainly doesn’t get all the way down into the very depths of the Sub-Sewers. The problem is the Atomic Apostles sealing off tunnels and then after it has passed, they just go back out and recontaminate everything again. If we flood the tunnels the place only gets clean for a month or two before it gets bad again, not to mention it costs a lot more than doing it this way.”
“Ah, I see. So this really is the only way then. I feel bad for the sewer maintenance crews.”
Neon Nurse replied, “We stopped having those a while ago. It was simply too dangerous. Even with a hero escort. The list of heroes for it was a little short since nobody really wanted to come down here to patrol. We foolishly abandoned the sewers and just let nature do what it wanted down here.”
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“I don’t blame them.”
“That was when we had that Brawny Park incident. You know the one? Where the petting zoo was irradiated and the festival was overrun by mutants and subhumans?”
I nodded, “I saw that one on the news. I couldn’t look at bunnies for a month after that. That was a while ago, back when I was in College.”
“Just goes to show how prolific this stuff is.”
“So I see.”
“The ecosystem changes a lot down here. Dr. Arbor could tell you more.”
I stopped in my tracks, “What does Dr. Arbor have to with this?”
“What? You thought she only studied the slums?”
“Yeah, actually,” I replied following along.
Neon Nurse wagged her finger at me, “Let me tell you, there are more crazy mutations down here than you would ever find in the slums. The radiation levels are way higher and the animals don’t get picked off as much. This leads to breeding cycles and hybrids getting bigger and stronger from natural selection. It is an evolutionary arms race down here.”
“… That, that sounds horrifying.”
“Hmm, how come you never used your machines to clean the place up?”
She frowned, “Well, we did try that once and it didn’t end well. My little robos are not strong enough to deal with the mutants. Now if I had my old apprentice, Vira then that would be a different story. We could churn out assault robos and have them scourge the sewers. But that would never happen. Vira is too busy being a criminal and I highly doubt that the Hero League would allow me to have an army of robotic soldiers under my control. That is of course assuming I hack her computers and stole the schematics. I mean the only reason I get away with the Cyber Swat members is cause they are fully sentient and I don’t typically fiddle around in their heads. So basically they are not under my direct control.”
“So you could hack Vira’s computers?”
“Well, sure. I wouldn’t though.”
I gave her a critical look, “Why not?”
She just wagged her finger and placed it over where my mouth should be on the helmet, “That is a secret.”
“But you could stop her and get them arrested.”
“Oh, silly they are not that bad. You act like they are violent fiends or something. They are just misguided children. Small fry in the big picture of Bronson’s criminal elements.”
“I still don’t get why we wouldn’t want them off of the streets.”
“Well, it is complicated. I will tell you later once we have a chance to really get into this,” she replied, turning and looking over the junction in the tunnel. “Looks like this is where we part. I will catch up in a bit.”
“Stay safe,” waved Sunshine happily.
“You too,” waved back Neon Nurse, fading around the corner.
“It is just you and me now, Nee-san.” Grinned the magical girl at my side.
I pat at her glowing bunny ears, “Alright, let’s not keep them waiting.”
The magical, colorful critter scampered ahead of us. It was pretty clear where the team had been since it was all clean already. Of course, the GPS dots on our minimaps helped too. They appeared to be stopped and rather clumped up a good 400 meters ahead? Meters? Who the fuck the uses meters? Um, ok so where is it. Ah, there are the settings. Alright, back to good old Imperial system. So 1,312 feet ahead. Oh wow, They really had been making some serious headway. Of course they probably had not been talking like we had.
I tapped the radio, trying to get a message through, “Hello, Catherine can you hear me?” There was no answer, hmm. I guess I will try again. What was that crap Medavac was saying? Oh yeah. “Whiskey tango? Anybody copy? This is rubber ducky? Smokey is on my tail and I need a jumper doodle. My ding dang is jammed in a wong wang and I need air support.”
Something tells me that isn’t what he really said. At any rate it should get people’s attention.
“Nee-san I can hear you loud and clear.”
“Not you Sunshine. I know you can hear me.”
I got nothin’. Maybe the signal is getting blocked by all the cement and radiation? If that is the case it is a wonder that I am picking up the GPS signal. Although, come to think of it, it is a little fuzzy. I was wondering why Neon Nurse told me to follow the trail rather than the hud. With my luck, we will run into them when they head back to refuel and we will have to walk all the way back.
All the way to their location was uneventful. Well, it better be, they already cleared this section. Strangely, it had been about ten minutes of walking and they had not moved on. Are they taking a break? We arrived at the large chamber where the signals were coming from and I slowed, stopping Sunshine in her tracks. Something don’t feel right. I don’t see anybody. Then rule number one when in a horror like situation came crawling up my spine, look up.
I did, and I certainly did not like what I saw. The five Cyber Swat members were cocooned in some sort of silky substance, dangling from webs that covered the whole damned ceiling. Wait a minute, cocoons? Webs, silky! Oh no, that could mean only one thing. Spiders! The sacks of silk wiggled helplessly. Wait a minute, they have super strength, then how fucking tough is that silk? I don’t like this at all. Every fiber of my being was scuttling and squirming in terror. If I was a cockroach, I would have already fled screaming. Sure enough one of Sunshine’s puppies accidentally brushed up against a strand that was connected to the floor and the walls came to life.
Sharp pointy legs stabbed into it, the yelping dog was dragged up into the layered web. It would have been encased in silk, but it was unsummoned, leaving the massive spider bewildered. By Helix that thing is huge! I thought the centipede was bad. It was some sort Eldritch horror with tentacles hanging from its face so that it could drag prey to the waiting spear like fangs. How did this thing get so fucking big? It is as big as a pickup truck. More legs moved and I realized, it wasn’t alone. Getting a better look at them, I saw a familiar design, a deep, blood red hourglass. So that must mean that these are giant black widows.
Oh dear Helix, I had seen enough hentai to know where this was going! Tentacles love magical girls. Thankfully, I am not a… oh no, Sunshine! “Run Sunshine! Save yourself from the tentacles!”
“Sunshine can fight too Nee-san.”
“Not against this you aren’t. Do you want eggs in your cloaca? Cause this is how you get eggs in your cloaca! Just stay in the tunnel and kill anything that comes at you.” I yelled at her, taking up a defensive stance.
Be brave, be brave… fuck this! Why do they have so many fucking legs?! Ngh, I hate spiders, I hate spiders. Why did it have to be tentacle spiders! Not normal spiders, or dog-sized spiders, or even car-sized spider. No, no, no. It just had to be truck-sized fucking tentacle black widows!
What sort of horrible… oh, look at those undulating fleshy limbs. It is enough to make me drool, so hypnotizing. You know, something smells really good. Are those the spider pheromones? Are you trying to seduce me?! I know you are widows and shit, but come on. We are not even the same species! Wait a minute, what am I doing? Get a hold yourself, Vesper. I slapped myself. Lord Helix have I not fervently worshiped your mighty tentacles?! Don’t tell me this is some sort of trial. Oh shit. I am going loopy with fear, Helix isn’t real. I should know better. I covered my antennae, rubbing them. Bad, bad, just stop smelling will you two?
Gunk splat against my suit and pinned my left side to the ground. Ewwww, what the fuck was that?! I struggled as the giant arachnid descended. Oh, son of a bitch, I had been too preoccupied to dodge or even attack. They shoot silk globs? That is scary as hell no wonder the other guys got caught. I’ll teach you to fuck with me! I screeched at it and the legs froze for a second. It was just in range. I rolled and my right side faced up. My hands grasped, one got a leg and yanked down, forcing it to come near me and the bottom right punched up straight into the abdomen.
It gurgled, clacking the fangs ever closer. My left limbs struggled. They could move, but not very well. This shit is strong. And it is so sticky, it makes it almost impossible to move. Damn it, if only I wasn’t in this suit, then I could. Wait, of course. I hit the release button and the suit popped open, letting me roll away as the spider crunched into the empty exo-suit. It kept biting, seemingly too stupid to realize that there was no meat in there. I took my chance and lunged, scaling onto the back before it could throw me off.
I have you now. Arachnids can’t reach their backs, well scorpions can, but that is another story. Surprise motherfucker! My abdomen bulged and my harpoon stabbed into the soft, leathery flesh. I shuddered with elation as the venom surged out of the stinger into my prey. I haven’t felt this sort of thing in a long, long time. I had forgotten how good it felt. It screamed as I wiggled back and forth, digging in deeper. Take it, oh yes, take it all you dirty girl! The legs gave out on it first and it thudded below me to the ground. It seems the paralysis has set in.
I got off of it and crouched in front of the eight plate sized eyes. The tendrils drug across the ground, reaching towards me. It was futile. My arm cocked back, reflecting in those dark spheres before it slammed into the head. I punched clear through the protective layer and straight into the cranium. The spider was helpless to stop me as I tore out the brain and tossed it aside.
I sat there, breathing heavily. My vents plumed. Oh, that was… delightful. Now that might have been better than bating. Hard to tell, it is very different. I suppose it was more of a finally getting to piss after guzzling green tea for eight hours straight and not being allowed to pee. I was so backed up on venom that squeezing the pouch muscles was just right. Come to think of it, stinging Captain Metal felt really good too. I really need to do this more often. Maybe I should let Neon Nurse milk my venom? Knowing her, she could make some sort of contraption. I mean, they do that for snakes and shit right? Hmm, I could probably sell it too. I bet Dr. Arbor would buy it. I should really look into that, but first, there is some unfinished business to deal with.
It looked like there were three more hanging up there. They were preoccupied with the plethora of critters that were flooding out of Sunshine. In fact, they were actually rather overwhelmed, trying to catch them all. They had made nets with their back legs and used the silk woven between them to snap down and drag up the glowing critters. How to approach this I wonder? They seemed to be completely distracted. I buzzed up, just a little below their web nest. It seems all that muscle exercises has paid off. As long as I didn’t touch any strands, then they wouldn’t know, or so I hoped. I mean Black Widows have bad eyesight. It is part of why they rely on webs.
They were positioned below me, trying to feast on the furry little imaginary creatures. Too bad for them, even if they caught them, there was no meat to eat. I lined up my abdomen and dive bombed straight into the middle section of the closest one to me. The stinger went in deep, hilting itself to deliver my insidious payload. I flicked my wings, knowing that it was only a matter of time before it fell over, unable to move. I yanked and didn’t budge. Ah shit, the barbs were stuck in the leathery hide. I rotated around trying to wiggle free. Below me, I could feel the spider slipping. Not good, gotta get free. I might fall into a fucking web or something.
Desperate, I reached back with my foot claws and started tearing at the flesh around the injection site. Sure enough, it gave me the room I needed and I flopped off, hovering away. The spider plummeted to the ground, sending bones and mummified bodies of various creatures scattering. I will deal with that one later. I looked up, seeing one of them get yanked down by several of the knights. They stomped on it brutally and snapped the legs so that it could not escape. Well, that takes care of that, then where is the last one?
I felt a tingling running up my spine. Like something was watching me. I turned and looked up, when I saw something dribbling down. Just as I feared. It had scuttled clear over to where I was was due to the thrashing on the other spider. The eyes didn’t move, however, what was in them did. Arachnid eyes are just weird. She knows! Her abdomen thrust at me and I dived to dodge the spray of silk. Unfortunately, right into a sticky strand of web. Clever girl. I struggled and squirmed as she gracefully slid down to my side.
“Ummm, we can talk about this.” I pleaded.
The widow clearly didn’t understand, drooling on me with her clacking fangs. The squirming tentacles that had grasped my free limb to keep it from smacking her in the face. I writhed which only seemed to make it hungrier. I coiled my body and lunged my flailing abdomen at her, stinger ready. It stopped inches away from her flesh. The angle was bad. I couldn’t get any more leverage. Oh no. Oh no. Ah shit.
Her fangs descended crouching into my hardened exoskeleton. My armored skin held up, until she bit again and pain seared through my chest. My boobie! I could feel the venom pumping into my frame. Like fire, it burned and I screamed. Something filled my throat and I coughed, throwing up. There was a bit of yellow in there. It appears that my lung has been punctured and filled with venom. I don’t feel so good. Her delicate legs tapped at me and then she spun me in circles, every time adding a layer of silk, until the world went black. The crushing pressure fought with the melting of my insides over what hurt more. The sounds and smells were muffled, it was just me and this agony.
Well, this is a shitty way to die. I always knew that spiders were the bane of my existence.