Arc 7 Healthy Green Glow
Chapter 12, Interlude: Sheila, The Mutant Hunter
“Right, I think we lost em,” said Sheila, looking around the empty tunnel. “Well, then. Elo and welcome viewers to another exciting edition of Sheila, the Mutant Hunter! This will be our fifth journey into the Bronson City Sewers. Unlike the Slums, this is a more primal and wild place. The Subhumans have some civilization about them. As such not so bad. Last time episode, I was down there, managed to nab some of Glitter Kitten's minge hair. Now that was a wild Pussycat I tell you what.
"Here though? It is a jungle out here. Danger around every corner, from the wily giant fuck off spiders to the rare an elusive nuddy mole rats. You never know what strange and mysterious critters we will find down here. Let’s see what we can wrangle up today, shall we? Ah, before I forget I gotta do the disclaimer. Kids, don’t be stupid, don’t try any of what you are about to see at home. It is dangerous and I mean fuck me dead dangerous. You have been warned so don’t you cheeky cunts dare try to sue me if you get a one way to ticket to destination fucked trying this shit out.”
She crept along, narrating everything that she saw. For the moment there was not too much, so she was mostly quiet, until she turned a corner. A pack of wild rats the size of dogs hunted a giant roach. Their mangy fur was mottled with bald spots and the yellowed teeth clacked together chattering. Meanwhile, the slick black-carapaced roach hissed at them, edging towards the wall in an attempt to escape.
“Uh, Ah! Look at what we found. The Bronson City Sewer Rat, pack hunters they is. Range in sizes from wee little fuck to full blown fuck off rodents. Seems that they are facing off against one of our own, Bronson City giant hissing cockroach. These little rascals have been around since before the meltdown and have only been growing larger and meaner since. Though they are hardy creepy crawlies, three on one is bit hard to deal with. Now the problem with the mutants is, their hormones and what not are all discombobulated. What this means is, they enter mating season almost year round. That makes a whole heaping gob of babies, more mutated than the last batch. It leads to some exciting and interesting adaptations. After all, only the strongest live long enough to breed.”
Sheila started up her commentary of the fight. “He goes in for a right hook and ah, it connects, right in wibbly dibblies! He’s gonna feel that one in the morning. The roach was like fuck off mate, there is more where that came from! Come at me bro. But the rat and his mates just ain’t having any of that, going in for another bite. They got him by the balls now, what will he do? Of course, he goes for the shakimaroo. He got free, but he is not out of the woods yet. The wanker rats still have him cornered. This is really back and forth, it could be anybody’s fight. There goes a leg! Such savagery. The roach is down, the roach is down! Things are looking dire unless there is some miraculous turnabout. Looks like the rats are going to eat good today.
“And there it is! The little bloke smacked him right in the gob. Knocked a tooth out and everything. Not today, you dick heads. He’s running, can he make it?! He’s like the Husein Bolt of roaches over here. And he’s gone. Fuck me dead that was a close one. What an exciting fight right from the start. Looks like this will be an interesting run. Let’s see what else we can find. Hopefully, we will be able to find the Cheeky Cunt Spider, deadliest of all the giant fuck off spiders. One bite is enough to kill a hundred men, if we find one, I am gonna poke it with a stick.”
She made her way along, following the gruel of primordial filth. The shit was literally everywhere and it glowed in the dark down here. Her adventure continued, side-stepping past chewed bones and scraps of clothing. Somebody had been eaten down here. It was not that uncommon, usually a drunk would do the old “look what I can do” and open up a manhole cover. These types of things never ended well. If they were not horribly mutated, then they would be eaten. Just about everything down here was carnivorous, including the fauna.
A thrashing sound echoed from up ahead between the grimy dripping sounds. She rounded the next corner and there was a scaly beast. “Crickey! Look at the size of that wanker! Now let’s get a little in depth on the ecology of this beauty. It is not every day you see a wild saltwater crocodile, they are native to Africa, however back before the meltdown and the zoo was overrun they had ten of these fuckers in an exhibit. Naturally, there were other exotic and rare beasties, but we are talking about the big old fuck off crocs. Now if I remember correctly the largest that they had was about ten or so feet. A lil bastard compared to this bloody wanker.
“Now, how she got down here I don’t know. If I had to guess, she looks to be about a twenty footer. From previous encounters, I can say with fair certainty that this here is just an adolescent. They get a whole lot bigger than that down here. Largest I have seen was a fifty footer. If we end up going to the toxic sewer pond, then maybe we will catch a glimpse of Old Stumpy. Clearly, this is one of the dominant predators of the Bronson City sewers. As you can tell from the plated scales, she is heavily mutated. As for what adaptations she has acquired, well let’s find out shall we?”
Sheila scooted along the edge of the canal, observing the giant crocodile. She picked up a bone and poked at the water to get the reptile’s attention. It slowly made it’s way over, just the head and eyes on the surface while the jagged tail crested a ways back.
“Now those of you watching at the edge of your seats calm down a lil, I am in no actual danger. She can’t see, hear, or smell me, hell won’t even feel me if I touch her, unless I want her to. That being said, weight is still weight. She will feel my added weight if I were to step on her for instance. However, she can see this here bone that I am using to draw her attention. That is just how my power works. In other words, I am a real sneaky git I am. Let’s see if we can ride her? That oughta be fun.”
To demonstrate, Sheila waited until the large beast had come all the way over to the edge and she stepped on the head. The weight pushed it below the surface. Baffled the creature threw it’s head back and uneasily looked around. The low grumble made the water shake. She waited a moment and then threw herself onto the back of the beast. The croc rolled and thrashed, trying to dislodge her, though it did not actually see her. It just knew that there was something there.
“She is really mad now! This is what is called the old death roll. Since crocodiles can’t chew properly they rip and tear at the flesh of their prey by latching on and rolling like this. If I was on the receiving end of this, well I would be fighting for my life and probably be tits up dead from the radiation poisoning down here. Luckily, this suit is pretty sturdy.”
Clutching tight like a lemur, Sheila was dug in deeper than a tick. After dozens and dozens of nauseating rolls, even those who might be watching were getting dizzy. The vague notion that this was how laundry in a washing machine feels came to mind. The croc gave up not even sure if anything was even there. It couldn’t see or hear anything and the dismal intelligence that it possessed made it forget all about the added weight. It settled down and resurfaced observing the area.
“Bloody ‘ell mates that was a wild ride. I was this close to letting go and chucking biscuits. Now let us observe the beast in its natural habitat. As an apex predator, this here beutie has very few predators to worry about down save some of the more gnarly mutants. Including but not limited to a larger individual of this species. Like Old Stumpy, for instance, could eat this little bugger in a single bite. A fair comparison would be a Great White to a Megalodon. It is just not even in the same ballpark.”
She sat there riding the crocodile as it meandered down the canal of sewage. To the sides, animals fled away from the water’s edge. They seemed to be rather wise. Soon it began to irritate Sheila that nothing was happening. She pondered on it and came to a conclusion, she would have to instigate some sort of confrontation with another critter. It was just too damned peaceful. People don’t watch boring stuff, they want violence, they want action they want brutal savagery and they want drama! Or they want cute and cuddly, but nothing down here was cute nor cuddly. It was not like it was going to start raining kittens or something.
She didn’t have to wait long for an opportunity to present itself. Over on the bank a mangy feral Subhuman stalked some plump rats that waddled along unsuspecting. Sheila pounced into action. She kicked off the croc, riling the beastie up and scaring the skins off of both the stalker and the prey. The rats scurried screaming away from the water’s edge at the sudden explosion of movement and the cat girl lunged, grabbing onto one of the rats. They were cornered between two vicious predators and that made them dangerous.
“Crickey! We got us a three-way fight to the death. In one corner we have the Bronson city rats, in another this feral subhuman, and last but not least, our very own crocodile. Place your bets who will win this desperate blood bath!”
She side stepped, backing away from the snarling and screaming as the creatures bore down on one another limbs flailing, teeth gnashing, tails swishing and blood spurting. It was a regular orgy of violence, just what she had been looking for.
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“The wily pussycat is agile and dexterous, but will it be enough to deal with the sheer power and cunning of the crocodile or will the rats emerge unscathed while the predators duke it out over a territorial dispute? There can be only one! The cat has got a big old fuck off rat with a horn. Clearly, that is an alpha rat. He’s going like do you even lift brah? Well clearly that she cat certainly does. She is lifting him right off to destination fucked! He can’t escape that death grip, not when she has got him by the scruff of the neck. The croc is bearing down will this be a fight for the ages? The cat is too preoccupied with her prey. She is already within striking distance! Her cat-like reflexes kicked in and she springs away at the last second! Truly a wild pussy on the loose over here. Can her feline prowess be contained? I haven't seen a pussycat this wet and wild since I cut myself shaving last week.
“The crocodile is going in for a kill! Ah, it missed. Come on you stupid twat, do something! I have been hyping you up for nothing over here. The cat has got this one in the bag- oh wait! A new challenger appears, the Cheeky Cunt Spider! The cat jumped too high and got tangled in the web. All hope is lost, pack your bags to nope vill cause this one is going to the arachnids. She’s got a one-way ticket to destination fucked. She is so fucked it is not even a first class ticket, shes flying coach. What a turn about, the hunter became the hunted. No one ever suspects the Cheeky Cunt Spider!
“This fight is looking about finished, everybody is running for the hills the true alpha predator has emerged. The Cheeky Cunt Spider of the fuckiousnopious order. You can tell by the red hourglass on the abdomen. The common name would be the black widow. The most venomous of all the fuck off spiders. One drop of venom can kill over a hundred men and a single bite can deliver gallons at a time. What is this? The croc has not given up just yet, she’s like fuck off mate I seen that bitch first. They are fighting over the catgirl and the rat. The humanity! They tore her in half. Poor thing, she didn’t stand a chance. Oh god the giblets are everywhere!
“Oh, oh! We got tentacles, people, it is a tentacle fight! I knew there was something weird about that clever girl, she’s got tentacles for a tongue. Will it be enough?! They are locked in a struggle for dominance, who will be the victor? Oh no, the Cheeky Cunt Spider reeled her in for a nibble is this the end?! And there is the death roll! She’s got her by the tentacles. This isn’t even a fight anymore, it is a downright brawl. The rats have fled, and now it is just Cunt versus the Croc over the downed cat girl. Who will claim the prize? Who will survive? Find out next time on, Sheila, the Mutant Hunter! Nah, just fucking with you.
“This ends here and now! Two men enter, one man leaves, Thunderdome style. One miss step and it is over. She’s got her in the eye! The Cheeky Cunt Spider landed a devastating bite, it is over. There is no possible way that the crocodile can survive. Ah, but she is not going down without a fight, that is one tenacious girl. And they are down, they are both down! It is just a writhing mass of tentacles and limbs. They are rolling towards the water! What a reversal, the Cheeky Cunt Spider can’t swim! It is over… the cheeky bastard rats won it all. All the predators killed each other. What an upset, what a display of cunning and brutality!”
Sheila wiped her hands, watching the rats scurrying around, sniffing at the strewn innards of the catgirl. It was a bit disconcerting to look at, grizzly and gruesome. Guts and torn flesh littered the ground. Foam and blood poured out of her mouth. The glazed eyes rolled into her head. It was a quick death. The spider venom worked within a few seconds after the injection, that was why she had not struggled too much after being captured. She squatted down, getting a close up view.
“Poor little pussycat, she didn’t stand a chance. See wankers, this is what getting bitten will do. Her insides are already liquefying into spider food. If that fuck off spider had not been interrupted then she would have been cocooned and saved for sipping later. Whelp, no use crying over spilled milk. Nature is as nature does, Mother Nature is a scary bitch after all. Let’s see what other critters we can wrastle up shall we?”
She idly poked at the floating bodies in the glowing water with a broken pipe. Not taking much longer she continued on, deeper into the bowels of the irradiated tunnels. The walls became flesh, squishy and oozing slimy mucus. Behind the thin membranes, countless wriggling masses loomed. She watched her step, ensuring not to step in any of it, until it completely overtook the tunnel and she no longer had a choice. She lightly pawed at it, testing the stability of the gurgling bumps below her feet.
“Danger, danger, danger. Mates we have found ourselves one of the most deadly of all the animals of the sewers. The Tubifex Worm Conglomerate. Usually, these are passive bottom feeders. However, nothing is kosher down here, not after the mutations. Much like the Venus Flytrap, these are ambush predators, lying in wait for creatures to set off their sensory organs. At which point the gurgling mass of flesh and teeth will latch onto the prey and absorb it into the mass so that I can expand.
“Now you might be wondering what makes it so daunting, so well, dangerous really? I mean the buggers can’t move to chase their prey and creatures can just avoid them. However, these things are insidious. They use pheromone and food lures to draw in prey to the deepest parts. See on the roof those bumps? If you look closely now you can just barely make out the sensitive hair like antenna dangling down like a trip wire. Once brushed against the grabbing tentacles will descend to scoop up their prey and drag it to the waiting worms. One of the worst ways to die, eaten alive from the inside out.”
Sheila looked around and found a cockroach in a side tunnel a little ways back. The thing was about the size of a cat, so it was easy to hold still. She brought it back to the edge of the growth, “Observe, we will use a live prey item to set off the traps. Watch closely now, these things are lighting fast and ready to pounce at a moment’s notice.”
She released the roach on the fleshy ground and it wearily waved the antenna atop its head. After a moment it caught the scent of food and scurried along deeper, until one of the near see through hairs brushed against it. Faster than a blink a slimy array of tendrils shot out from every direction, latching onto the hard carapace. The roach screeched desperately before being dragged over to the side and pulled into one of the bulbous lumps. The dark shape could be seen bulging as it was pushed deeper inside the tunnel below the writhing flesh.
“Now that you have seen these squibly bastards in action and know the dangers, let’s do this!” excitedly said Sheila stamping on the gurgling flesh.
She made her way along, due to her power even if the hairs touched her, they didn’t get set off. They would pause for a moment, then continue to wave about. It didn’t take very long for her to catch up to the roach being pushed through the innards of the colony.
“Now, Tubifex Worms have a stomach like area usually near the middle of their territory, it doubles as a womb and nursery. You will know it when we see it. Here the eggs and larva hatch and consume the most recently caught prey. They do all of this complex and sophisticated societal behavior without a single brain among them. Truth be told, they are a lot like Jellyfish. Nerves and sensory organs run everything. And it seems that we have arrived, welcome to the heart of a Tubifex Worm Conglomerate.”
Before her rose a pillar of flesh that connected the ceiling and the floor, only allowing passage by squeezing to the sides. The membrane was translucent here allowing a full view of the inner workings. Various creatures had been captured, ranging from rats to Subhumans. Their flesh bore strange designs where the worms had burrowed into the skin and eaten away as they went. All of them were already dead, lack of air and breathing in worms would do that. The unsettling squirming masses of little bodies moved almost like blood cells in a vein, cycling in and out of this nexus point of the colony. It was alive and pulsating, squirming.
“Now if I was with the rest of the group we would be dousing this thing down with fire and then put out the flames with Rad-Gone to get rid of the radiation. As for why I am not, well it is simple they might not know I am here, but if I start messing with stuff then they will start reacting due to the nerves. On my own here, with nobody to rescue me, well that doesn't sound very ace now, does it? Being eaten alive by worms is a bad way to go. Normally, I like animals, these things those are not natural they are more of a cancerous growth than anything else. They are resilient and even the larger predators avoid their territory. If left unchecked, these disgusting things can take over the whole ecosystem and kill everything else. So remember you ever see this stuff growing somewhere, don’t get near it and call it in. These things are invasive and destructive.”
“Well, moving on. I think we have spent more than enough time with these. The other side of this tunnel should be an access point to the lower sub level. There should be even more crazy things down there. I already got to poke a Cunt Spider so we are off to a good start. We still haven't seen a Nuddy Mole Rat this time around.”
Sheila walked carefully and squeezed between the fleshy fold and wormed her way out to the other side. This side was more of the same. Sickening bulbous globs of flesh growing everywhere, pulsating and breathing. She made sure not to set off any of the hairs and finally the green glow of sewage became a welcome sight at the end of the tunnel. She slowed for a moment, glancing both ways. Everything always went downhill, so she followed the flow. It would inevitably lead her down.
This place seemed strange… there weren't any animals. Only bones, chewed, broken, and spit out. The marrow sucked dry. This wasn’t the doing of the worms. She stopped, listening to her surroundings. It was quiet, too quiet. A faint sound echoed from ahead, crunching. Sheila snuck to the corner, peering down the corridor where the sound came from. At first she didn’t see what was making it, too dark. Then it shifted. The massive, yet gangly form seemed contradictory. It was tall, roughly ten feet if she had to guess. It had to slouch over or hit its head on the ceiling of this tunnel. Oddly, there was a big old rat following along to the side, though it seemed weary.
On her back, yes, it was a her. Sheila could see the big old honking boobies, sadly no nipples. At any rate, on the back, there was a smaller one riding on the shoulder. They were rather waspish-looking and the thought it kinda looked like Vesper came to the forefront. What are the odds of that though? Pretty damned high. There weren’t any other wasp monsters running around, or at the least, there shouldn’t be. But then what the fuck was that thing with her? It called for a little hands-on investigation.
“Well slap my ass and call me Sally, I never seen one of those before. Must be a new species that spawned from the primordial muck. Dahh, she has a little baby with her. Whelp, you all know what that means. Let’s poke her with a stick,” Sheila’s malicious grin spread.