It was too fucking early, I shouldn’t have taken that military contrator job. It was hard knowing Anne was still in bed, cozy and asleep after last night. Could’ve been worse though, I had slept well, tired enough that pain didn’t keep me up, and I didn’t quite remember the way, so I had something to keep my mind from wandering too far. The relative quiet of the city early in the morning was nice, as was the silence that surrounded me as I got further out.
I clearly had made an impression on Kidan at the last test firing, she was already nervous. She must have heard me unlocking the gate as she was staring at me as soon as I entered.
“Zalgeth, ma’am, sorry I’m not sure how to address you. I’m sorry if I came across as disrespectful before. I didn’t know who you were.”
“And you do now?”
“Yes. I don’t, didn’t expect anyone with your experience and recognition, anyways, as an apology, I got a new stock, should be easier on your shoulder.”
“Won’t that mess with the results, changing something?”
She shook her head, “I got nothing useful from last time, and I have the old stock if you want.”
It was strange sure, but why bother changing them out again, and Anne had been getting through to me, less pain would be better.
The new stock was simple enough, just had padding and was bigger. As much as this whole thing was pointless and frustrating it was easier to put up with when I was hurting less. The shooting itself though was far worse. Some seemed slow, not by much, and sometimes that seemed to drop them early, sometimes it didn’t, as well as the bullshit from last time.
“At least it probably means you're getting more magic into them.” I didn’t really care about Kidan but still I didn’t like seeing her frustrated, seemed like she was going to cry over this. I guess it made sense with the hours she must have put in. It was easy for me, I didn’t care and just had to show up, and I could quit whenever.
She spent some time looking over her notes while I stood around doing nothing.
“Fuck it, excuse my language, but that’s enough for today,” she said, turning to me. “I’ll take this to my stats friend again, but I think it is more of the same.”
I shrugged, “Wish I could help.”
“You are, this is much faster than having to dig bullets out of a target, and someone has to use this, that’s the idea anyway, might as well make sure nothing goes wrong with that.”
I shrugged again.
She still paid me for the full day, which I thanked her for. Having cash in my hand made it seem worth it. I didn’t have any idea of what to do with the money, but there must be something good that could be done, and I did want to keep the job, it was such easy money, the idea of quitting seemed, wasteful.
When I got home Anne wasn’t there and I realized that I had never been in our room without her. I didn’t know how to feel about that, didn’t realize how this place was so connected to her. Almost felt like I shouldn’t’ve been there alone.
I didn’t spend that long cleaning before Anne got back.
“Welcome home.” I said before giving her a quick kiss.
“You didn’t need to clean anything,” she hugged me, “but this is a nice surprise. Everything okay though? Not home early for a bad reason?”
“Nah, just wasn’t working again, at all. It seems random what the bullets do, I don’t understand it, or why even try, but whatever, got paid for the whole day and it’s not my problem.”
“Not surprising. Tell her to read Lumka Mhlaba, I think the book is called Religious Practices of the Interior, something like that, Religious Ceremonies?”
This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.
“You know why it’s not working?”
“Don’t sound too impressed, I think I know why it’s not working, and I have no idea how to fix it, doubt it’s possible honestly.”
“It’s nice to have a girlfriend who knows everything.”
She shrugged, “I just read a lot, and I’ve told you what my family is like.”
“Yea. So what were you up to?”
“Lunch, I usually go somewhere for it, don’t want to spend my whole day in here. Did you eat yet?”
“Fuck, forgot.” I was embarrassed, it had been a while since I forgot a meal, I think.
“Let’s go then, I’ll show you the coffee house I go to.”
“Did you just eat there?”
“So?”
“Point taken.”
It was only a few blocks away, still in the rich area around parliament. Like the other one we went to with Victoria the windows were painted over and there were no signs indicating what it was.
“How did you find this place?”
“I asked.”
Stepping inside I was surprised to see it took up the entire ground floor.
“There are three stories,” Anne explained, “first is like a regular coffee house type thing, second is a restaurant, third is a library or bookstore. From what Fanaka said, this is parliament’s fancy one, and it is nice, good food, good books.”
“You’ve been talking to him?”
“A little, went to ask about how to learn side saddle and one thing led to another. He’s easy to talk to, and it doesn’t hurt that he respects us for the shields, nice to get the flattery without any weirdness.”
“Right, sorry, I wanted, want, to do the side saddle thing with you.”
“It’s fine, really, just got the address of a place he knows, I haven’t done anything with it yet. I know we’re not exactly busy, but it’s a lot, big changes in our lives. I have to keep reminding myself of that.” I gave her a little hug and she continued, “anyways, let's go up to the restaurant.”
“I can have something down here, you already ate.”
She smiled at me, “I could go for a drink and dessert, and I want you to see it.”
I got that dim lighting and dark colors was part of the aesthetic of these places, but it was annoying how hard it was to see. Anne led me to a table with a couch on one side instead of chairs.
“Thanks,” I said. It wasn’t exactly nerves, but Anne being able to sit up against me on the couch helped me relax. A waitress found us before I could look at the menu.
“What can I, oh hi Anne, back so soon? And you must be her girlfriend, she mentioned you a few times.”
I nodded
“Work ended early for Zal, so I figured why not take her out, show her the place.”
“Good idea. Anne’s become quite the regular here. Have you had a chance to look at the menu yet?”
“No, but uh, Anne, what do you normally have?”
“Soup and sandwich.”
“I’ll have that then, and some water.”
“And I’ll have a coffee and some cake, and a second sandwich for Zal.”
Once the waitress left I turned to Anne, “I don’t need two, really, I’m doing a lot better.”
“You forgot a meal.”
“Yea but –”
“No, I’m not letting you slip on this. It’s not even that much for someone as tall as you.”
I sighed, frustrated at myself. “You’re right. It’s just, I feel like I do nothing but at the same time that I’m always overwhelmed.”
“You’re still healing, and growing wings, and we’re both fucked up a little.”
“Still. I haven’t written my mom in a while, we haven’t written Victoria at all. It’s not that hard, it, I don’t know.”
“I can write to them. I’m not going through anything physical so things are easier for me, I don’t mind.”
“Victoria sure, thank you, but my mom? I think I have to do it myself.”
Anne gave my hand a squeeze, “she has to get to know me somehow.” I didn’t look at her. “Zal, it’s okay not to be able to do things.”
“I don’t have to like it.”
“But hating it doesn’t help, and I want you happy.”
“I know.”
“You’re gonna be worse than normal until you finish growing your wings. We’re not gonna be able to figure out how much you can do before that.”
“Yea, I’m getting used to the pain already, easy to forget that’s happening.”
“You’re not excited to fly?”
“No, only looking forward to being done with it, and being able to wrap them around you.”
“Gross. Get that idea from Lilly?”
“Yea.”
“She’s something.”
“Can we maybe not talk about her.”
“Okay, but, let me know when you can.”
Anne quickly showed me the library before we got our food. I see why she liked it here, it was simple, light, good everyday stuff, and while I didn’t like how dark it was she could see better than me so it probably didn’t bother her. I don’t know why I imagined her spending almost all her time in our room, she’s smart enough to know that’s not healthy. Thank the gods she was looking after me, I didn’t realize how hungry I was, and when we got back home I was able to have a nice nap.