My grandfather has set me on an impossible task. Lucia is vehemently against bathing. I’m not sure why. And it’s not like she smells funny or anything from lack of washing. That’s right. How does she wash normally? “Lucia…? You wash yourself, right?” If she says she licks herself clean like a cat, I’m not sure how I’ll respond.

“Mm. Of course. Why? Do I smell?” Lucia released my shoulder and sniffed herself. Couldn’t she release my other shoulder too? She was pinning me to the door of the pagoda that the impurity cleansing pool was located in.

“Cleansing your impurities is like washing yourself.” On the journey to immortality, impurities are a major hindrance. They slow your qi circulation which slows your cultivation and the speed at which your techniques come out. Impurities can cause health problems. In short, impurities are the bane of every cultivator’s existence. That’s how it is according to my grandfather. Lucia seems like she’d have a lot of impurities since she eats earthly food, but she still reached the saint realm just fine, which is a little weird.

“Hmm. Promise?” Lucia’s eyes narrowed at me. She looked like a fox eyeing an unsuspecting rabbit. That makes me as pitiful as a rabbit. …Just what have I been doing as chosen? Why am I so worthless? Compared to Lucia, I’m nothing….

“Oi.”

Ow! It really, really hurts when she flicks my forehead. “Y-yes?”

“You didn’t promise me and started crying instead. Are you trying to trick me?”

Before I could respond to that, Lucia tripped me and grabbed my waist. Then she slung me over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes. This, this is humiliating! “S-someone, help!”

“My Wife Moonlight’s being swept off her feet by someone other than me!”

The door flew open, no, it flew off its hinges with a bang as Lucia kicked it down. Elder Shu was nowhere to be found even though he was supposed to be on duty. As a saint-realm expert, there’s no way he didn’t hear the banging noise! I’m going to report him to my grandfather when I have the chance. And who keeps calling me Wife Moonlight!? “L-Lucia. What are you doing?” There’s no point in struggling. Grandfather said Lucia had the strength of a fire dragon. Besides, this is a no-violence zone too.

“I’m going to look at your impurity cleansing pool,” Lucia said. Her tail kept brushing against my face, and I had to fight the urge to sneeze.

“As you should. Our daily spars aren’t challenging enough for you to ingest beast cores properly. I wouldn’t be surprised if those dragon cores are still lying dormant inside of you.” Durandal appeared out of nowhere and walked alongside us. It must be nice having spirits you can summon at will. If I had a few weapon spirits, I don’t think I’d be as lonely. But weapon spirits aren’t very reliable according to my grandfather. They require a constant upkeep of qi even if they’re dormant which greatly slows one’s cultivation. And most weapon spirits have a lifespan of less than a decade. That’s nothing in the eyes of an immortal.

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

“Eh…. I’m a very pure person though.” I could feel Lucia nod since my hip was right next to her head. “How many impurities could I have possibly built up?”

“You eat a lot.”

“That doesn’t mean anything! If I ate a lot, then I’d be fat, right? But no, I’m not fat. So there! I’m eating the proper amount a girl my age should be eating.” Lucia’s tail smacked my head a few times as it swished back and forth. I heard foxkins’ tails telegraphed their owners feelings. It seems like that was true. It’s very easy to tell when Lucia’s upset. I just wish I knew why. It seems like Lucia’s displeased by everything I do…. No one’s ever displeased by what I do. Is it a problem with everyone else, or is it a problem with Lucia?

“Mm. If you say so.”

“Durandal! What’s that supposed to mean!?”

“Nothing. I was agreeing with you.”

What’s this buzzing sensation by my hip. Lucia’s … growling? Is she going to attack Durandal? I hope not; this is a no-violence zone! “Ah, Lucia. The top floor of the pagoda is reserved for chosen.” There’s so many people here. It’s embarrassing to be carried around like this, but at least, I won’t have to wait in a line. Even though there’s an appointment system to use the impurity cleansing pool, a lot of sect members take more than the allotted time and a line is formed. But chosens have benefits such as using the purest water at the top without having to wait for anyone else.

“The top? Isn’t that too far for a chosen to walk? I thought chosens were special; shouldn’t we get the most convenient spot like this room right here?” Lucia knocked on a door nearby, and it fell open. A few women screamed. I think she broke down the women’s changing room…. “Ah, oops. Why’s everything so flimsy here?”

“Only your mansion’s reinforced to handle your strength,” Durandal said and patted Lucia’s head. Lucia reached over and covered his eyes while dragging him past the room of panicking women. I hope they don’t develop heart devils from this. While planting heart devils amongst each other is encouraged in the sect, it’s a great way of making enemies. Lucia might be a chosen, but her backing isn’t that great. She may have the elders of the sect watching over her now, but if she ever falls from grace, all the people she built animosity with will be waiting to tear her apart. This doesn’t include me, by the way. I’m not going to attack someone who sent Elder Forest flying no matter how far that person falls. My grandfather says I’m too nice.

“That’s another thing I need to petition the sect leader for then,” Lucia said and sighed. Another thing? What else was she going to ask of my grandfather…? “I take those stairs to go up, right?”

“Those stairs only lead up.”

“I was asking Softie!”

“Y-yes. Those stairs lead to the top of the pagoda.” Is the relationship between Lucia and Durandal not good? I wouldn’t be too surprised honestly, considering how she treats Puppers….