Adrian sat on the front porch, listening to Reya’s story. His hearing picked up the conversation clear as day, even from the distance he was. He heard the no holds barred version of what they’d spoken about that night when it was just the two of them by the camp fire.
Silent tears ran down his cheeks as he wept for the cruelty inflicted upon her. He vividly imagined how she earned each scar, her story painting the gruesome picture for him with fine strokes. Sniffles and cries filled his ears as her friends learned of the true horrors Reya had faced.
By the time she was finished, all three girls were a crying mess. Tassie begged for forgiveness once more, the guilt from her decision to leave crushing her from the inside. She cried harder when she learned that Reya truly didn’t blame her for what happened.
Adrian smiled softly as he heard the love and support Reya received, propping her up where she would otherwise fall. In stark contrast, he shivered alone in the cold with no one by his side. He looked up at the pale moons, struck once again by how alien they looked. He couldn’t shake the wrongness of them.
There were no lights on, blanketing Adrian in darkness. He hardly noticed. Thoughts and memories of his own suffering came welling back up, unbidden. The moons morphed into the lights of the operating tables he’d spent so much time laying on. The staccato of the insects hidden in the grass muted as the clicks and shrills of the surgeons that uncaringly opened him up filled his ears. The shadows cast by the trees were reminiscent of their black hands reaching towards him.
Adrian stayed on the porch long after the girls returned back inside. His hollow gaze stared into nothing as he lost himself in his memories. He slowly froze in the cold mountain air, his cheeks becoming as numb as he was. He blinked and stared down at his hands, coming back to himself. He looked around and he remembered where he was.
He was alone.
----------------------------------------
Reya prepared herself a steaming mug of tea in the kitchen. The last hour had been nerve-racking. Tassie and Rann were seated on the couches in the living room, still processing Reya’s unfiltered story.
There was one detail she’d glossed over and that was the final injection she’d received right before she’d been rescued. She’d summed it up as something that hurt more than the chemical they’d doused her cuts in, not ready to divulge what exactly it felt like. Words would never be enough to describe the experience. Adrian was the only one who fully understood that detail, having also lived something similar.
The water in her mug slowly turned a warm amber colour, diffusing from the teabag that floated within. Walking over towards where she left the girls, she found them sitting in quiet contemplation. Now that others were present, they were less inclined to openly discuss Reya’s time in captivity. Setting the mug down on a coaster on the dark brown coffee table, she took a seat next to Tassie on the couch.
Unconsciously tugging at her sleeve, Reya looked over towards her friends. Tassie looked slightly green while Rann was rather pale. They’d spoken about lighter topics since returning inside, but Reya could tell that their minds were elsewhere.
“It’s hard, trying to imagine what that must have been like,” Rann said.
“Then don’t,” Reya said. “Leave the nightmares to me.” Something in her gaze must have alerted Rann, because Reya soon found herself pulled into a long hug. Resting her head against Rann’s shoulder, she took a moment to relax into the embrace.
Jyn came wandering down the steps, scanning the crowd. He spotted everybody but Adrian present on the main floor. Narrowing his eyes, he searched for him. When Jyn didn’t spot Adrian, he turned to the group in the living room and asked, “Where’s Adrian?”
His question shattered the moment between her and Rann. The hug ended and Reya turned to look at Jyn. “I don’t know,” she said. “It’s been a while since I last saw him.”
Jyn’s brows furrowed in displeasure. “Has anybody seen him?” When he got no reply, his tone grew irritated. “You all had one job. All you had to do was watch him. Why is that so hard?” His frustration at the laxity of his team mounted and he snapped. “It’s like you’re not even trying! We’re on a mission, not a vacation. We’re not here to talk about our feelings and make friends,” he exploded. “Now where is he?” he yelled.
This book's true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.
Stunned silence filled the room. As if sensing that they were talking about him, the front door opened, and Adrian walked in. His dead eyes took in the scene before him. “I’m right here,” he said monotonously.
Jyn whirled around. “Where were you? You’re not supposed to be unsupervised.” He redirected his anger and lashed out at Adrian.
“Jyn, calm down. He’s back now. Everything’s fine,” Reya said.
“No, it’s not!” Jyn said, turning towards Reya. “Why can’t any of you see that?”
Adrian moved into the kitchen to get himself a glass of water. Walking by the island, he noticed that he forgot to put away one of the knives on the counter earlier. He’d cleaned it and left it to dry, not intending to be outside for as long as he’d been. Idly he picked it up and tested its edge before looking around for the knife block that it belonged in.
Jyn didn’t see any of that.
All he saw when he turned back around was Adrian holding a large knife. “Put the knife down,” he said in a low, threatening voice.
Adrian glanced towards Jyn. “Relax, I’m just putting it away.”
“I said put it down!” Jyn hollered. When Adrian didn’t comply immediately, he reached towards his belt and drew his gun out of his holster, pointing it directly at Adrian. “Put. It. Down.” he growled.
Adrian froze, his eyes widening. He saw the utter seriousness in Jyn’s expression and knew he would be shot if he didn’t comply. It wasn’t an idle threat.
“Jyn!” Reya yelled. She looked towards Adrian and saw the fear in his eyes.
“Calm down,” Beor said in a placating manner, trying to pacify him.
“Put the weapon away,” Rann instructed.
“I said put it down,” Jyn repeated, ignoring the others.
Slowly, Adrian placed the knife back on the counter, not making any sudden moves. Raising his hands away from the knife, he backed away, his eyes never leaving the muzzle of the gun. Jyn walked forward with his gun still pointed towards Adrian, forcing him to navigate around the counter in an attempt to distance himself.
Jyn picked up the knife and put it away. He lowered his gun but didn’t holster it. “Where were you?”
“Not that it’s any of your business, but I was sitting on the front porch,” Adrian said coldly.
“Why were you alone?”
“Did it ever dawn on you that maybe I just wanted to be alone?”
“You know you’re not supposed to be unsupervised. What were you doing that was so important?”
“Nothing! I wasn’t doing anything. I literally just sat there on the porch. Why is that so hard to believe?”
“You expect me to believe that you went outside dressed like that?”
“Yes,” Adrian cried in frustration. “What else do you want from me, Jyn? Not everything has to have a hidden reason or be a threat.”
Jyn narrowed his eyes. “I don’t believe you,” he said. He took a step towards Adrian. Adrian took a step towards the stairs. His eyes flicked towards them. He slowly made his way over.
“That’s not my problem,” Adrian said harshly. “Get over yourself, as you like to say. I’m going upstairs to my room. Surely, I’m allowed to go there, right? You keep trying to force me there, so there shouldn’t be a problem.” He slowly backed up the steps, his eyes never leaving the gun.
The sound of a door gently clicking shut was heard as Adrian entered his room. Satisfied that Adrian was where he belonged, Jyn put his weapon away. Rann turned on Jyn. “What the fuck was that?” she demanded. The others stared.
“What?” Jyn asked, perplexed. “He picked up a weapon. I’m not going to let him risk hurting us.”
“That was uncalled for, that’s what that was.”
“No, that was dangerous. I acted to remove the danger.”
“You’re the only dangerous one here! He was going to put the knife away, like he did with the others when he was cleaning up earlier.”
“You mean you let him pick up other knives?” Jyn said, the anger evident in his voice.
“Don’t you change the topic here. We’re talking about you pulling a weapon on him. He did nothing wrong.”
“He threatened us!” Jyn argued. “I reacted. That’s all there is to it. He got more than he deserved.”
“More than he deserved? You’re saying he deserved to be shot? What the hell is wrong with you?”
“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you? Ever since we’ve arrived, you’ve treated this mission like a joke. We don’t know him, Rann. We don’t know what he’s capable of. He’s a threat until proven otherwise.”
“He’s been nothing but nice given the situation. You’re the only one who sees him that way.”
“He could be deceiving you all! Why do you trust him so much?”
“I don’t! But that doesn’t mean I’m going to pull a weapon on him for mundane actions. You want him to hate us and want to hurt us? Because this is how that happens. You’re the one pushing him to snap.”
“I did nothing wrong!” Jyn insisted. For the first time, he looked towards the others. He saw the disapproval in their gazes. They were all against him. Every single one of them. “This is ridiculous. I’ll be on the ship if you need me. Try not to get yourselves killed.” He stormed out of the house and into the night.
Reya glanced up the stairs to where she last saw Adrian’s retreating form, hoping that he was alright. When he didn’t reappear from his room, despite knowing that Jyn must be gone, she grew worried. She wondered how he must be feeling.
----------------------------------------
Adrian lay on his bed, his mind replaying the night’s events. He pulled the covers closer to ward off the aching loneliness of being trapped so far away from home. He reminded himself once more that when the others looked at him, they saw a threat, not the person he was. To them, he was nothing more than a job. A thing. He’d deluded himself into thinking otherwise. He’d been a fool.