Chapter Seven - Lending an Ear

“Each Samurai’s personal appearance is, technically, owned by the Samurai in question.

That is why it is strongly advised that, when you begin to sell clothes that imitate their look, you do so through the intermediary of at least three shell companies.

This will inevitably mean a large loss in profits, but it also serves as a method to keep your company safe. Even with the great losses, copying Samurai fashion is wildly profitable.

The moment a Samurai comes out in public, their looks, their colour scheme, their style and mannerisn become iconic. Some change their appearance on a nearly-weekly basis, others keep to a certain look and style for months or years until their equipment changes.

As long as the Samurai never decides to question you, then you can expect to make a tidy profit.”

--Brian Jacques, CFO of the Coco-Gucci-Vouton Fashion Consortium, 2051

***

I picked up my invisibility jacket, shook it once or twice to get the gunk off of it, then sighed. “One sec,” I said before heading over to the bathroom.

The shower, a place that had recently climbed to my personal top ten, became host to my jacket which I flopped to the ground.

“Shower, on,” I said.

When I returned to the bedroom, the shower still running behind me, it was to find Lucy cradling Dumbass the First on her lap and patting its head. The robot had turned on its hologram projector again, making it look like a rather smug tabby cat, though the illusion did break where Lucy’s hand touched it.

“Okay, so things to buy,” I said.

The cat nodded. “Indeed. As I mentioned a moment ago, I believe your next investment should be a sensor suite.”

“And what would that entail?” I asked.

“Oh, entail,” Lucy repeated. “Big words, Cat.”

I stuck my tongue out at her. “I can use more complicated words too, you know.”

“Really? This morning you seemed to have a hard time articulating anything more complicated than baby seal noises.”

I felt my cheeks warming and turned my focus back onto Dumbass the First. “Sensor suites,” I said.

“I would suggest a Sun Watcher Twin Ear system. It’s a bit intrusive, connecting to your auditory cortex, but its uses are quite interesting. The Twin Ear comes equipped with ultrasound, laser microphones for hearing at long distances, a geiger counter, thermal sensor, radial sonar and motion sensors, selective sound filters, spatial recognizers. It even has a balance-assist system, and long-range wireless communications.”

“Alright, that sounds pretty cool,” I said. “How much?”

“Seventy-five points. The installation requires that your head be uncovered,” Myalis said. “You may feel a slight tingle atop your skull.”

I weighed the options back and forth for a bit. I didn’t feel that more sensory stuff was pressing, exactly, but on the other hand, it was probably something similar to armour. I didn’t need it until I did, and then it might be too late to ask for it.

“Alright, let’s do it,” I said.

New Purchase: Mark III Twin Ears

Points Reduced to... 8437!

My head did tingle, and I felt my... hair moving?

I was reaching up to investigate when the world exploded into sound. Not overwhelming noise as I might have expected. No, it wasn’t that. The world just became incredibly... clear.

I’d once switched from shitty in-ear buds to a proper headset, one that another orphan outside of the kittens had splurged on, and the difference in the sound had been wild.

This put that to shame. I could hear everything. The kittens fighting a ways away, the thumping of feet below us, air vents shifting above. The elevator was a low rumble, and Lucy’s heart was a steady twin-beat in the background.

“Whoa,” I said.

My voice sounded... well, it was still my voice, but it sounded more, somehow.

Lucy made a little squeaking sound, one that I heard loud and clear.

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I looked over her way, only to see her grinning like mad and pointing at me... and something above me.

I reached up. My questing fingers bumped into something, something that seemed quite firmly attached to my skull. Something that moved.

Turning, I rushed over to the bathroom, every step sounding very loud.

I didn’t need to, of course, I had a sort of sense of the world around me that I’d never had before, but I still had to see.

“Myalis, what the fuck?!” I asked.

Standing nice and proud above my head was a pair of metallic cat ears in a familiar dark blue. The interior was black, with a pink dot in the centre of each ear surrounded by a faint pink-ish glow.

“It’s a very advanced sensor suite,” Myalis said.

“You gave me weeb ears!” I said.

Lucy clapped. “They fold back when you’re mad!” she cheered.

I looked over to the mirror to see that they did, indeed, fold back. “What the hell Myalis?”

“Cat,” Lucy said. “You shouldn’t talk to Myalis like that, she’s trying to help you.”

“I am,” Myalis agreed.

Lucy hugged the faux-cat closer. “Plus I think they look cute.” She smiled. “I wouldn’t mind something to nibble on, sometimes.”

I felt myself flushing again, then stalked off into the bathroom to pick my jacket out of the shower. The water had been enough to soak most of the dried up alien blood and soot from it. “Shower, dry,” I said, then I waited a few minutes, ears peeled to the sound of Lucy talking the next room over.

“You really should have shown her what they looked like,” Lucy said.

“Perhaps. But then she would have likely refused them. And I’m afraid that without additional systems like those, she might hurt herself,” Myalis returned.

“And there wasn’t a single system that didn’t look like cat ears?”

“... Perhaps. But these are the most amusing.”

“Myalis,” Lucy said with the same warning tone I’d heard her use so often on the kittens. “Cat is a very sensitive soul. You need to be careful with her. She’s all soft and gooey under that hard outside.”

I glared at the shower. I wasn’t sensitive.

“I am aware,” Myalis said. “Perhaps I can tone it down a little. Though it is still greatly amusing to embarrass her.”

“It really is,” Lucy agreed. “Oh, speaking of, do you have scarves?”

“Yes.”

I grabbed my jacket from the shower, waved it around a bit to push off some of the last drops still clinging to it, then barged back into the bedroom. “What’s this about scarves?” I asked.

There were about two dozen of them hovering around Dumbass the First. Holograms, obviously. Lucy smiled at me, then gestured to all of the cloth around her. “This makes buying clothes a lot easier,” she said.

“We could never afford clothes,” I pointed out.

“You can now,” she said with a shit eating grin.

I crossed my arms. “What makes you think I’d buy clothes for you?” I asked.

“I bet Myalis can get some really comfortable lingerie,” Lucy mused.

Internally, I cursed Deus Ex for giving me a stupid mission that would drag me away for so much as an hour. “M-maybe later,” I said.

“I think this one, but in pink, like the colour around her arm,” Lucy said as she gestured to one of the scarves.

“Really?” I asked.

“It’s one point,” Lucy defended herself.

I rolled my eyes. “Fine.”

New Purchase: Plain Cloth Scarf

Points Reduced to... 8436!

The packet with the scarf appeared next to Lucy, and she was quick to open it. “Ohh, silky,” she said as she got to her feet, Dumbass scurrying off her lap in a hurry.

She placed the scarf around my neck, then used it to pull me into a kiss.

“Come back safe, alright?” she asked.

I leaned into a second kiss. “I will,” I said. “The Dumbasses will stay here, just in case.”

She nodded, then turned me towards the door before giving my rear a smack I barely felt. “Go be a hero,” she said.

***