Chapter Fifty - Trash Panda Pondering

"You must choose one. Cut the general working's salary. Or cut the security force's salary. You absolutely cannot do both."

--Lessons in Human Resources, Fifth Edition, 2038

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The ride back home, with Rac clinging to me from behind as I rode my bike across the skies, was about as awkward as I expected it to be.

Probably more for me than for her, to be fair. She hadn't done anything weird, just hung out with a boy close to her age.

Maybe I was reading too much into it. It wasn't like I was her mom or anything. She could do what she wanted. I was pretty sure Gros Baton was like... seventeen-ish, so there wasn't anything too weird there. He was definitely a better friend to make than the gang she'd been riding with recently.

Well, I guess mercs weren't a gang, but Garter and his little buddies were bad influences.

A bunch of samurai were probably much better people to hang out with. Probably.

Samurai at least had the benefit of the Protector AI picking them out as 'good enough' folk. But I might have been a little biased there.

We swooped in towards the only building with a giant cat topping it off, and I brought my bike down for a gentle landing before the doorway. I could have gone into the parking garage, but the weather was actually kinda dry, for once, and I was too damned lazy to slow down fully and slip in. Plus, this spot was more fun to leave from in the morning.

"Alright, off off," I said. Rac needed to hop off before I could swing my leg up and over. I bounced on the spot for a moment, then glanced over to Rac who was staring at me, hands in her pockets. "What?" I asked.

"It feels like you wanna say something," she said.

"No?" I tried.

Her eyes narrowed. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure," I said. "So, uh, let's go in? Unless you're heading out again?"

She looked up. The sky was that deep bluish colour that came when all the nightly ads came on, with a few spots of purple and orange where some bigger signs caught the lower hanging clouds. "Nah. It's late. I might load up the printer again. Uh, I'm running out of materials for it."

"Ah, yeah, that'll happen. I kinda put that out of my mind, what with Phobos and all."

"Right. The end of the world is more important than that," she said before shifting. "Kinda weird that we have to worry about that."

"Heh, yeah, you tell me. You know, when I became a samurai, I thought I'd mostly be worrying about smallfry issues. A few aliens here and there, maybe a big hive to blow up. But mostly I expected to have to take care of me and mine and maybe the neighbourhood. This is... bigger."

"I get that," Rac said. She scratched at the back of her neck. "I wasn't expecting to live much longer, you know? There's only so long you can go, scrounging in the undercity. I had a good run at it, but you can only be so lucky. Never expected to be where I am now."

"Hmm, yeah," I said. "Uh... maybe we can do something to help others? Other Racoons out there, I mean. Not now-now, but it'd be nice. Once we have things settled. We can set something up. But first, you know, the world."

"Save the world, worry about the little people after?" she asked.

"Pretty much, yeah. Come on, I'm starving." I tapped her on the shoulder, then walked on home. The moment I was indoors I shucked off my helmet and tossed it onto the couch, then I flung my coat over the back of a chair that was supposed to be in the kitchen.

I wasn't just going to leave my guns anywhere, though. I wasn't that irresponsible. If I left them out, or my sword, there was a one hundred percent chance I'd be woken up by some Kitten crying because they shot themselves in the foot.

I took a deep breath, then sniffed the air some more. Something smelled nice.

"Cat!" Lucy said as she popped out of the kitchen. She ran over and crashed into me with a big hug.

I hugged back, of course, squeezing her closer and pressing my face against the top of her head. "Hi," I said.

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"Hi," she replied as she pulled her head back and craned her neck out to meet me in a kiss. "Mmm, good day saving the world?"

"Pretty good, yeah," I said. "I'll show you the footage later. We fired the Big Gun, it was pretty cool."

"Oh, I bet!"

"Maybe I'll have you come over? I don't think there are any rules about who can press the big red button."

"Is there actually a big red button?"

"It has a little plastic cover and a bunch of flicky switches and everything," I said. "I don't even know what they do, but it's kinda awesome."

Lucy giggled, then pulled out of the hug fully, but not before grabbing my hand. "I made supper!"

"Oh?" I asked as I allowed her to drag me along. "What'd you make?"

"An entire chicken! Then I had to make another because someone wasn't showing up and the kittens got into my first chicken and they... kinda messed it up. But it's okay, the second one turned out better than the first, I think. There's still half left!"

I blinked as I tried to follow along with that. "Where did you even find a chicken?"

"Well, I didn't hunt it myself, did I?" she asked. "I bought it, Cat. You can do that, buy raw, whole chickens. They come in a bag."

"Huh," I said. I supposed that was possible. The only chickens I'd ever seen were either wings, fried breasts, or in the shape of little dinosaurs. Not that I didn't know what a chicken looked like. There were plenty of chicken logos around and stuff, and like... movies had them sometimes. Just, I'd never seen a live one, or a whole cooked one.

Lucy let go of me to proudly gesture at what was sitting on the kitchen island. There was, indeed, a whole chicken there, in a glass pan filled with some sort of greasy brown sauce and chunks of... something.

"What are those?" I asked.

"Veggies," she said. "They're good for you."

I wasn't in the habit of eating vegetables, and I wasn't sure I was ready to start. But on closer inspection it was mostly diced potatoes and maybe carrots, all baked in some sort of sauce. It did smell real good, and there was still a bit of steam rising off the top.

"Well shit, grab me a plate and some knives," I said. "I'm about to do a number on this bird."

Lucy grinned, then turned to Rac. "Want some too? It's good, I swear. I've been getting better."

"I don't refuse free food," Rac said reasonably.

I started to cut into the juicier, less bony parts of the chicken until Lucy saw what I was doing and stole my knife and fork from me. Apparently I was doing it wrong or something, but the end result was being served a hefty chunk of meat and so I wasn't about to complain.

"You know, you really make saving the world worth it," I said.

Lucy smiled. "That would be far more romantic if you spoke after you finished chewing, Cat."

I smiled back, then made a point of swallowing. "It's because it tastes so good?"

"Nice try, but no. Oh, and by the way, we need some upgrades for the kitchen," Lucy said.

"We do?" I asked. The kitchen looked fine to me. Fine-ish. It was a little messy, but I was sure Lucy could bully some of the kids into doing a half-assed job of cleaning it. "What's wrong with it?"

"The oven is a mess inside."

"So clean it out?" I tried.

"Fuck that, I'd rather buy a new one."

I shrugged. "Okay."

God, it was nice being stupid-rich.

Lucy seemed to agree, because she looked extra smug for a moment. "Alright! Well, if that's the case... I think I'm ready to explore baking. Let's see if I can't make a cake."

"Your cake is fantastic already," I said.

"What did I just say about flirting with your mouth full, Cat?"

"I had a long day?"

"I don't know how that excuses you," she said. "Well, whatever. So, tell me about your day. Spill that juicy gossip, because I've been starving for it over here."

"Oh, I have some good stuff to spill," I said. "So, what do you know about international samurai and their weirdness?"

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