----------Gekido’s POV----------

[Church]  “ALL HAIL IVY-SAMA!!!”

Are you kidding me?!  I finally traveled hundreds of miles to get to some random village, and as soon as I arrive there, I hear people praising the self-proclaimed goddess!!!  Not only am I pissed, but they are going to be pissed as well.  I can’t even kill the she-devil in charge of making this mess in the first place!  Ugh!!!!

[?]  “Hey, hey mister.  Do you know Goddess Ivy?”

[Me]  “Stop with the ‘Goddess Ivy’ stuff!!!  It’s making me sick!”

Instantly, the entirety of the surroundings becomes silent.  I look down and, to my horror, discover the one I yelled at was a little boy.  The little boy’s face becomes red and tears begin to slide down his face.  I look up once more and find that the crowd’s face is pitch black in anger.

[Me]  “What?  I’m sorry for making the kid cry, alright?”

I really can’t afford to make everyone hate me.  I will be staying in this village for some time, and I do not need neighbors trying to kill me.  Despite my heart-felt apology, the crowd’s anger does not dissipate.  Rather than dissipate, it seems to have increased in intensity.

Quickly going through all the options in my head, I can’t think of why they still carry hatred against me.  My ‘wrath’ side is not showing, I apologized for yelling at the kid, I’m not breaking any laws, and I’m not releasing any killing intent.   Why are they still mad?

Oh?  The Head Priest is coming this way.  I wonder why his face looks so livid.  It’s almost as if someone killed his entire family and hung it outside is doorway.  Or church.  I can’t remember where the old geezers of the church live.

[Head Priest]  “You?  YOU!?  YOU DARE DISRESPECT GODDESS IVY AND BREAK ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT LAWS OF THE CHURCH?!?!”

[Me]  “What do you mean, ‘I broke a law of the church’?!?!  I NEVER broke any laws here!!!"

[Head Priest]  “One should never speak badly about Goddess Ivy.  THAT IS THE LAW YOU BROKE!!”

[Random Person #1]  “One should always follow Goddess Ivy.”

[Random Person #2]  “One should never act rashly, unless in the name of misfortune.”

[Random Person #3]  “One should always respect Goddess Ivy”

[Random Person #4]  “One should encourage the spreading of the word about Goddess Ivy.”

[Random Person #5]  “One should always revere Goddess Ivy”

[Many Other Random People]  “One should…”

[Head Priest]  “Indeed!  Not only have you broken one, but you have broken 27 of the cardinal laws of the Church of Misfortune!”

Oh come on!  How are some of those even laws!  Furthermore, WHY ARE THERE SO MANY LAWS?!?!  I only said one sentence, and immediately broke 27 church laws.  Are you kidding me?!

This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

You are now considered an enemy of the Church of Misfortune.

While inside an area ruled by the Church of Misfortune, you will have a loss of 20% in all stats and will be subject to being attacked.  Should someone kill you while you are in an area ruled by the Church of Misfortune, they will receive a permanent boost of 5% in their stats. 

What in Hades name is this?!  It’s not supposed to be that easy to be considered an enemy of a church!  Seriously, what is wrong with…

OUCH!!!

Did… did that little boy just stab me?  Who in their right mind gave this child a dagger?!  Also, who taught their child to STAB strangers?!  Thank Hades I’m a devil and have a high regenerative ability!

Quickly backing away from everyone, who seems to have somehow gotten their hands on weapons, I rush into the forest.  As I reach the forest, a few arrows lodge themselves in the trees near me.  What am I running from?  An army?!  This was supposed to be a normal, everyday village!!! 

After about ten minutes of running, I manage to lose my pursuers.  My calf, which was stabbed earlier, has finally stopped bleeding as well.  I slow down, and begin to walk cautiously.  I have heard reports of dangerous creatures looming in these woodlands.  Furthermore, my stats are still down 20%.  This means I must still be in the Church of Misfortune’s area, and as such, sill in danger.

[? #1] “How do we know you’re an actual goddess and not just some fraud?!”

[? #2] “Indeed, we have no proof on why we should follow you!”

What is going on?  Where are these voices coming from?

[? #3] “WHAT WAS THAT?!"

[? #4] “I DON’T KNOW!!”

[? #5] “WHY DID YOU BLOCKHEADS INSULT A GODDESS?!?!”

 What is happening?!  These voices sound panicked!  By ‘goddess’, do they mean the self-proclaimed Goddess of Misfortune?

I finally break through into a clearing and see a ghastly sight.  A small pebble is acting like a vortex, and is somehow sucking in everything in the surroundings.  I have to both clad myself in my mana and hold on tight to the branch I am on in order not to be dragged in.

Suddenly, about 1500 extremely strong creatures appeared out of nowhere.   A large portion of them then voluntarily moved towards the vortex and sacrificed themselves to stop it.  The other creatures just bowed in front of a throne and dispersed throughout the forest.

D-did any one just see that?  About 1400 high-level beasts above level 800 just entered the forest.  Unsupervised.  No, wait… four noble devils just went with them. 

…where did the noble devils come from?  Aren’t devils supposed to be a rare and hard-to-find species?  Aren’t they supposed to be in hiding?  So, why are four noble devils going with the high-leveled demons?  Why does it look as if the devils are leading the high-leveled beasts to another location?  Why am I the only one who noticed this?!?!

Suddenly, all of the robed figures bowed down to the figure in the throne.  They all then looked up with the utmost sincerity and shouted out to the figure.

[Robed Figures] “GODDESS! PLEASE LET US FOLLOW YOU!!!”

Wait… goddess?  Goddess?!?!  Goddess as in the Goddess of Misfortune?!  THAT SELF-PROCLAIMED GODDESS?!?!  …and there goes my sanity.

I couldn’t quite hear what the ‘goddess’ said next, however the figures all responded vigorously.

 [Crowd] “THANK YOU GODDESS IVY-SAMA!!!”

WORLD WIDE ANNOUNCEMENT:

All lands once belonging to the Evil God Malum now belong to the Goddess of Misfortune Ivy.  This includes buildings and followers.

 …crud.  Not only am I now considered an enemy of millions, but it turns out that the ‘self-proclaimed goddess’ was an actual goddess.  I also still have to approach such a goddess or else my dark past will be exposed…

Help?  Anyone? 

…Please?

---------- 3rd Person POV ---------- 

*A little later*

[Malum]  “Hmm… Ivy?”

[Ivy]  “Yes, Malum?”

[Malum]  “Couldn’t we have just showed them your status as proof?”

[Ivy]  “…”

Alas, no one but Ivy would know that she never meant to show any ‘proof’ from the beginning.  All she wanted was a peaceful life that she was never actually going to get.