Do you know what kind of experience I learn when I was a grab driver? It’s that people only see the outer appearance and judge it. Whenever I tried to enter Borey, the security at the gate will check the content of my box and my motor. If you aren’t familiar with the word “Borey” you can Google it. I’m too lazy to explain it since this word meaning is really hard to translate into English.

Every time people see me they judge me as a delivery person, someone poor and could be a thieve without even knowing what kind of person I am. Sure, I did stole something from my family but that’s all. I am an opportunist who only stole from my own fuxking family who love me. God, I really am a pos. Every time I reminded of that I realized what kind of toxic person I am. First step in changing to a better future is realizing that you are the “PROBLEM”, yup it’s in capital later because of how important it is. Do you ever listen to Taylor Swift song “its me I’m the problem” of Anti-hero? If not you should listen to it. Like her or not, her song carry some powerful lyrics. Unlike some song that rap about their toxicity, sexual and drug. You see, Borey were robbed many times before. Can you guess what those robber ride? Hahahaha, it’s expensive cars. They drive car and kidnaped someone for ransom in Borey. Not motorbike, not delivery person. “Never judge a book by its cover” is so ironic. In my country there are many con man, do you know what kind of car they drive? What kind of house they live in? What kind of life they show off in social media? What kind of position they hold in society? I’m rolling on the floor right now thinking of those answers. Most people who con millions in any countries aren’t poor bastard who ride motorcycles, it’s those who show off their lifestyle, decorate themselves with luxurious goods. They drive around in their expensive cars, live in their luxurious mansion and show off their expensive lifestyle on social media. So don’t judge somebody if you haven’t get to know them. They might have more money in their bank account than you, they might have many problems in their life than you too. I really love the quote “Do right. Do your best. Treat others as you want to be treated.” Sometimes this quote won’t work since most people love look down on others. But that doesn’t mean everyone are like that. Someday eventually you will find the right person. Everyone should be kind. I don’t mean be kind as in donating money to charity or something like that, but I mean be kind in feeling and attitude. I got help by those who just show pure kindness, someone who is kind just because they can and normal. If any of you watch “JJK” I think you know who is my favorite character is. My first love is the kindness person I know beside my family. Well that pool is small though because I don’t know many people. She probably doesn’t realize how much help she gives me when she was kind to me as if something natural for her. Despite we aren’t dating, I still hope that all the good things would happen to her. I am the type of people who don’t use some word lightly, “friend” and “love” are the word I don’t use often. I have no friends and I only love two person in my life beside myself. These two people are the only sole reason I haven’t commit suicide yet, my number one is my mother, without her I have no other reason to continue into the future. I might take the extreme way in my job, I will not ride carefully anymore. Don’t worry I won’t try suicide anymore. I can’t help but think about suicide but I’m too much of a pussy to put it into practice. But there are many ways to die. One of them is live life dangerously and the other is putting yourself in dangerous situations. I might enroll into the army if she was to be gone. And that thought scared me so much. I can’t imagine my life without her. So, if god you are real, please do not take this person life from me. Please let me die before her, I’m a bad person but she isn’t. She goes to church every Saturday and Thursday. She devote her life to you so if you are real then you should really protect her. I believe there is a godlike being but I don’t believe that godlike being to be benevolent and kind like they claimed. How could someone or something keep their sanity for millennia and how can we human ever understand the thought process of such being. I mean we can’t even comprehend our own species so you are full of yourself if you think you can understand such godlike being. Admitting your own limitations is one of the quality you should have if you want to move forward. If you are still reading till this part I sincerely you avoid the mistakes I did in my life. This story isn’t about how I find love or changing myself. This story is for you readers to know about what you should avoid in your life. I just want to tell my story to anyone. Anyone is fine as long as I can tell this story, I don’t want it to be lost inside my crazy mind and when I lost my own remaining sanity.

If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

Thank you for being here for me you stranger that I don’t know.