Novels2Search
I have been blessed by Chaos but all I want to do is chill on a farm
154 – I Can't Think Of A Title, I'm Getting Birdbrained

154 – I Can't Think Of A Title, I'm Getting Birdbrained

The harpies circled the ship a few times before boarding the deck. By orders, there were only a few spiders stationed there, but even so, the harpies remained cautious. They kept to each other, maintaining the close formation. One of them, presumably the leader of the flock, stepped out of the flock. Her clawed feet tread the deck with bravery, her feathers puffed like a peacock. She was aiming for a nearby spider, a little dude stationed there to keep the deck clean.

She stretched her wings and puffed out her chest, striking an appealing pose. Perhaps a courteous greeting of sorts. Or perhaps not. For a fleeting moment, her eyes glowed in a familiar crimson. The glow prompted a vague memory within the Spider King, too distant to remember well.

The spider chirped a spidery greeting, giving the puffed-out harpy a cute wave.

The walking bundle of feathers frowned, as if displeased by something. Her nose twitched and her feathers deflated.

Hey, you scoundrel, when a spider gives a cute wave, you wave it back!

The harpy fluttered her wings. "Girls, this one won't do. It ain't a male," losing interest, she turned away from the spider, ignoring its little chirps completely.

Mer Princess poked her head out of the bubble, leaning in to whisper. "They speak the Demonic language." Meaning that the harpies are subjects to the Demon Lord.

The harpy, puffed like a peacock again, strutted towards the Spider King and the Mer Princess, her entourage following her like ducklings from behind.

The harpy glanced at the floating bubble, neither impressed by the impossible magic nor interested in the Mer inside. Her gaze locked on the Spider King, her expression turning lecherous.

"Finally a male," she pointed at the Spider King with the tip of her wing. "This one is mine. You go check inside," her other wing pointed at the steps going down.

The flock split in two, one part went down the stairs by the deck, the other remained behind the lead harpy.

Feeling the harpy's burning gaze, the Spider King straightened his back. "Greetings, I am the..."

He didn't get to finish. "Hey, listen!" The harpy spread her wings and puffed her chest. "Look into my eyes," her brown eyes turned crimson.

[LoveBound Necklace activated the Reflect:Charm]

Suddenly her pose changed completely. Her wings hung low and she looked at him with heart-filled eyes. "Hey! I've just noticed how handsome you are. Give me your name, handsome," she spoke in a songbird voice.

"I am the Spider King, captain of this fine vessel, but I am more interested in you, feathered strangers. Who are you, and why did you board my ship?"

"Hey? You're interested in me? Hehe," she fluttered her eyelashes, fanning her face with a wing. "Let's go somewhere private... and I'll show you everything you want to see." She leaped forward trying to snatch him with her wings.

He fended her off. "That... That is unnecessary. How about I learn your name for starters."

"Who cares about that? Hey, how about a kiss?" she leaped again, offering a feathery embrace. "Ah!" she exclaimed suddenly, rubbing the back of her head.

"Bad harpy, bad! No horny!" the spider cleaner spoke in semi-broken Demonic, waving the broom threateningly.

The harpy fluttered her wings, the heart shapes disappearing from her eyes. "Eh? What happened? What was I doing? Oh, right." She puffed her chest out. "Look into my eyes, [Charm]!"

It was reflected right back at her again.

"Hey mister, want to make a baby?"

A splash was launched from within the bubble, dousing the harpy in cold water.

"What are you doing? I am wet now!" She complained, striking an angry pose. "You'll pay for this," her eyes glowed again.

The little spider bonked her head with a broom a second time, knocking the heart shapes out of her.

The Mer Princess splashed the heated harpy for good measure. "You must be birdbrained or something... Don't you get it, the Charm won't work on him, you featherhead!"

The harpy tilted her head sideways. "It won't? But..." she pointed her cute nose upwards, sniffing at the air. "But he reeks! A strong, overpowering musk of a male!"

The Spider King shuffled closer to the bubble, leaning in to whisper, "Day, do I stink? Why didn't you tell me?"

"You don't! There's clearly something wrong with the head of that bird," she didn't bother to whisper back.

"Oh, okay."

But before the Spider King could lean away, Day grabbed him by the shoulder, pulling him close again. "But just in case, I'll give you a good bath later. In my tank and all, full service," she whispered the last part with a wink.

If you stumble upon this tale on Amazon, it's taken without the author's consent. Report it.

Engaged in whispers, the Spider King failed to notice the approach of the harpy. Her nose was now close and sniffing at his chest.

"Yup, the same smell, the one we picked up an hour ago," she pulled her nose away. "Are you sure my charms won't work on you?" she asked, nuzzling her cheek against his chest, her wings aiming for a hug.

"Enough!" Day flung her hand towards the harpy. "[SplashAttack], he is a King and you must treat him appropriately," she doused the harpy in water.

"Hey! You bubble monster, don't do that! I can't fly with wet feathers."

"Huh? They were wet before I even attacked, you harlot of a harpy. Spider, bonk her!"

"Now, now ladies, let's relax. No need to fight." He stood between the two. "Let's start fresh, perhaps at the dinner table?"

The harpy perked up, forgetting what all the ruckus was even about. "Dinner?! Sign me up!"

"Then come inside, let's catch up with the rest of your flock. I worry about them. I hope the spiders treated them right."

They headed towards the stairs heading down. A bunch of harpies had already gone down there, and the rest were following right behind the Harpy Boss.

The steps led down to the mess hall. The harpies who had split up from the leader beforehand were left in a pitiful state. Something very terrible had happened to them. They were huddled together in the corner and shivering, their expressions frightened and full of tears.

"Boss," a harpy from the group cried, "don't go any deeper! Terrible things will happen to you!" She tugged at the cloth binding her chest.

"A trap?!" the lead harpy turned back towards the steps.

Above the stairs, standing tall and proud, the little spitter blocked the narrow passage with its broom. It was staring at the trapped harpies, its yellow eyes glowing menacingly.

"Rule number one," the spider chirped, raising a digit of its claw. "You shall not be naked!" The spider slammed its broom into the ground. "[GetEm]!"

From beneath the darkness, from within the shadows, from unseen holes and hatches, spiders spilled. They clacked their mandibles, their claws spinning a blue thread. These guys were juniors looking after the ship, little and cute spiders, but at this moment they were as formidable as the grown-up spider warriors.

"Ahh, help!" the harpy flapped her wings.

"[WeaveWeb]," the spider chirped, catching the harpy with a lasso-like string.

The Spider King rubbed his temples. "None of this was supposed to happen. But rules are rules." He watched the spider dress the Harpy Boss in an expertly woven tank top.

Why tank top? – You can ask the spiders that.

...

There was resistance at first, but as soon as the food came out, the harpies warmed up to the spiders. It was at the dinner table where the harpies told their sad story.

Once upon a time, the humans invaded the Demon Realm, pillaging and plundering through its territories. Contrary to what some might think, it was a golden age for the Harpy Village. War was a time for bounty and rewards. And bounty and rewards they had plenty of.

Moreover, warring humans were the optimal mating partners, their blood young and their essence strong. The harpies snatched many of these young men, growing the Harpy Village as a result. And all was well.

Unfortunately, the Demon Lord pushed the humans back, winning back the conquered territories. The realm no longer hired the harpies as scouts and messengers, the rewards dwindled, and the bounty dried up.

And yet, there were now over a thousand mouths to feed. More often than not, they were on the brink of starvation, but they managed somehow. But troubles didn't fly alone. The Harpy Queen was growing old, her nest without eggs for months already. Someone had to take her place soon. The village was plunged into chaos, flocks of harpies competing with each other. As the custom dictated, the flock that snatched the most males would get to lead the village into its new future.

That was why flocks of harpies were flying great distances away from their village, hunting for bounty in hopes of crowning a new queen.

That was their story.

After putting the story pieces together, the Mer Princess was rubbing her temples. "None of this makes any sense. They are completely birdbrained. Hunting for males won't help their situation! The village would get even bigger, and then they would all starve for good."

The harpy swallowed the tomgrape she was eating. "The flock is stronger with more harpies! And I want to be a new queen!" She flung her wings to protest Mer's words.

"Nonsense! That way of thinking will be your doom!" the surface of the bubble bubbled from her shouting.

The harpy flapped her wings, her feathers puffing up. "What would you know? You're just a bubble monster, ugh!" She stuck out her tongue.

"How many times do I have to tell you? I'm not a bubble monster! I'm Day Sapphire, the Mer Princess, the Maid to the..."

"Yeah-yeah, whatever... Hey mister, listen, are you sure there aren't other males on this ship? Someone we could snatch away?"

The Spider King, who had been deep in thought, looked at the flapping harpy. "No, only spiders."

"Spiders are no good!" she tugged at her tank top, her wings failing to take it off. "Can you come to our village? Just a small visit. Please!"

"..."

"Pretty please! Pretty please with a feather on top!" She looked at him with big, begging eyes.

"Don't look at me like that... We have a Quest to finish... We can't." His heart was wavering. The harpy in front of him was just too pitiful.

The big, cute begging eyes soon turned crimson, activating the Charm ability.

The floating bubble quivered with anger. "Do you have straw for brains?! [WaterSplash]!" she splashed the harpy back into working order.

"Oopsie, bad habit," she shook the water off her feathers. "Hey mister, please reconsider. If you do, there's a reward for you."

"A reward?" The Spider King perked up.

"Yes! A Reward!" Excited beyond explanation, the harpy jumped on the table. "I've almost forgotten about it! But we harpies have something that sells well." She squatted above the bowl carrying tomgrapes.

"???"

"Just give me a moment!" she made herself comfortable.

"No! Spider King, don't look!" the Mer Princess cautioned.

The warning came too late... "!!!" An egg was laid within the bowl.

"Go on, grab it while it's still warm," the shameless harpy urged him.

Slightly shell-shocked, the Spider King took the egg in his hand. "It's bigger than I have expected."

"Thanks, I do try!" She gave him a sunny smile. "Now eat it!"

"Eh? Can I?"

"I assure you, it's very delicious."

"Spider King, don't you dare to eat it!" the bubble bubbled. "I'll tell your wife!"

"... I'll just put it in my Inventory then."

The harpy jumped off the table. "Fine by me. Now you've got your reward. Mister, you must visit my village."

"Village... Eggs... HarpyEggs..." something hard to explain burned inside the Spider King's eyes.

...

The Galleon Whale changed course, flying towards the distant mountain in the north-west, its feathered passengers gorging themselves on the plump tomgrapes.