The cute merchant Shadyna has finally saved enough money for her first caravan~

…Is what I wanted to say, but I feel like the players here will look at me with disdain so let's not.

_ Olkan: She even limits us to just walking while pulling wagons. Sateri-chan got us good…

She wasn't wrong though, considering that running was the first thing you guys tried out. If a caravan arrives at a town by running the whole way at ramming speed like a charging cavalry legion, I probably would install SPD-debuffing totems on the roads to slow them down myself!

_ Elri: Huh? Our Ren can run though? Did you accidentally activate some option or something?

My mentor orders the salamander to runs up a bit to prove her words. Despite pulling a whole wagon while carrying both its mistress and me on its back, the former boss of darkness has no problem scurrying around like nobody's problem. Meanwhile, the other beasts of labor are just casually strolling along.

There's no horse in this game by the way. Instead, we either pull the wagons ourselves, or have summoned beasts do it for us. I was going to pull ours by myself before being stopped by a desperate who begged me not to do it with tears in his eyes.

Not because of the various labor laws violations per se, but because having a flat-as-a-board girl leading the caravan of is against their core beliefs and ideology!

…I feel attacked. Can I punch him in self-defense now?

_ Olkan: Couldn't happen to all of us if that was the case… [Inspect], activate!

The handsome man on the throne raises his hand to his eye as if he is a protagonist unleashing his hidden power (Inspect) to defeat (peep at) the last boss! Well, we are not in battle so it's fine to be a tad dramatic. I doubt it would suddenly turn the usually useless skill into something useful anywa…

_ Olkan: Hmm… I got it.

HOW?!

_ Olkan: I haven't explained anything, so why do you look so confused?!

_ Elri: Just ignore her and explain.

Elri, I don't think neglecting your students are considered good mentoring these days, just saying~

_ Olkan: O…kay… I think it's because your pet has SPD buffs. My theory is that pulling a wagon applies a hidden SPD debuff. It must be a percentage-based one to limit everyone's SPD in the same way. Intentional or not, the debuff doesn't take magic buff into its calculation, so you can get your SPD back above the walking animation threshold to run again. Obviously, I can only see the numbers so this is all conjecture on my part. I'll ask to crosscheck later, but we can verify it now by casting SPD buffs and…

Even though he said he only saw numbers, this greasy merchant is somehow giving a lecture about the new meta?!

I try doing the same on Ren, but all I get is the HP bar, as per usual.

What is this discrimination, [Inspect]-chan? Do you happen to prefer degenerates like or something?

_ Olkan: …What's with that look? Did I say something wrong?

_ Miel: , are you puzzled because this sorry excuse of a player, whose entire existence consists of "chair ", "greed", and "boobs", somehow managed to spew out coherent words as if he actually has more than three brain cells?

_ Olkan: Why are you suddenly insulting me?!

_ Shadyna: Un.

_ Olkan: Don't just nod in agreement without any hesitation!!!

Well, she's not exactly wrong, and you are probably just upset because the modest-sized is saying it instead of Elri…

Since we are at it, I also would like to know how the hammer waitress (kind of) knew what I was thinking despite sitting behind us, on the coachman seat. She can't possibly read my mind, can she…?

_ Miel: While he is like that, is still a player from the beta. He has something you don't thanks to that.

_ Shadyna: Oh~ And what is that?

_ Miel: Old age.

_ Olkan: Experience! It's called experience!!!

Can't be helped then. I am still a young and cute half-elf after all~

_ Olkan: Why are you nodding with a satisfied face!!! I am not old!

…

We continued experimenting and verifying various things on the move so as not to waste everyone's time. It turned out as suspected: Beasts can run in "wagon mode" (temporary name) with the help of SPD buffs from skills, [Alchemy], or [Cooking]. That being said, the end result is still a lower speed due to having a debuff in the first place.

_ Shadyna: So in other words, wagons are heavy.

_ Olkan: …You can also put it that way, yeah.

Much shorter and more immersive than your earlier meta presentation too~

_ Elri: It's a pain, isn't it? That means we cannot run away from enemies of similar levels.

_ Olkan: True that. Taking this into account, we might have to increase the minimum number of guards to stay competitive too.

I almost doze off from the morning (?) breezes and the long-winded discussions about logistical costs and values between the leading members of the caravan. It's not my fault that Ren is so comfortable to ride, and Elri's back, despite her metallic armors, is heaven to lean on!

From the sounds of it, is conflicted about using buffs on beasts of labor. On one hand, faster caravans mean reduced risks and more profit. On the other, consuming items drives up the expenses, especially higher-grade ones. They will need a lot of experimenting to find the perfect balance for maximum profit, or something along those lines.

As for me, there's no problem as long as we can reenact the "snobby merchants running over some poor peasants in front of the protagonists" scenario, because it has to happen now that wagons are involved.

That said, I might have to refrain from [Fishing] until we iron out the logistics of creating several fish-filled wagons every two hours though~

_ Elri: We've reached the Dry Grassland. , we will head east from here.

_ Olkan: Time sure flies. Shall we continue the discussion at a later time?

_ Elri: If we finish our errands early and agrees to it, sure.

In the end, it was a short uneventful trip. From this point, caravan will march across the arid zone while we go along the barren land towards the forest. I was a bit curious to see how we would fare against the caravan ambushes cliché, but I suppose it's not going to be today.

_ ???: How about we help you two return quickly for your… "discussion"?

…Or so I thought.

From the tall, brown grass thick enough to hide an adult if they crouch, a rough-looking man in leather armor emerges. I know it's bad to generalize but… he's totally a bandit, isn't he?

All of us are rendered speechless as he intimidates us by making a nasty grin and a few swings with his rusty sword. Considering that rust is not a thing in this game, that aesthetic must have been deliberate design choice rather than a lack of maintenance.

_ Bandit (?): What, so scared already? Man, this is even easier than I thought.

_ Elri: …More like confused about how you plan to take on all of us at once.

Not to underestimate the opponent but my mentor has a point. Even if you are one of the stronger players in the game, 1v100 is not something to take lightly. He certainly doesn't look like one that can, and probably would not need to ambush if he was.

_ Bandit (?): Eh? *Turns sideway* Oh for Sateri-chan's sake, guys! Can't you work together with me for once?!

Whoops? He has it tough too huh~?

Right on cue, two more similarly rough-looking players pop out of hiding next to the bandit leader (?).

*Whack* *Whomp*

…And proceed to punch the crap out of him?!

_ Bandit #2: That is our line, you idiot!!! What's the point of lying in ambush if you reveal yourself like that?!

_ Bandit leader: Owowow!!! I'm sorry! They were splitting up so I thought we should strike before their detachment could escape!

…It's our fault for some bizarre reason?

_ Bandit #3: And they wouldn't run if you stood up and spilled the beans from miles away?! Why did we even make you the party leader?!

Good question. You should have realized that before we arrived though~

_ Bandit leader: I'm sorry! I won't do it again!

I don't know about morale, but while the beatings continue, the remaining enemies are revealing themselves since the cat's out of the bag. 4…10…15…30… Just how many of you were patiently hiding in the tall grass for someone to pass?!

The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

_ Random passerby: Mom, what are those players doing?

_ Random passerby #2: Shhh, don't look. Wait, who the hell is your mom!!!

See? Even other players share my sentiment!

I poke my head left and right to get a more accurate headcount. Although it's a bit hard with Elri in the way, I'm pretty sure they outnumber us. While bandits are known to depend on their superior numbers to stand a chance against better-equipped merchant escorts (in media), having over 150 men is way too many! Did you guys plan to take on every single convoys that go through this zone or something?!

_ Miel (Party): NPCs…

Now that my stoic party member mentions it, the majority of the scoundrels have NPC Lines. Not 50% majority, but like 90% of them. Including the three maniacs that seem to be the leadership, I can only see around a dozen actual players in this army.

This NPC-to-player ratio is unheard of, even in The Ranch where the most powerful LDR-oriented players gather. Are there additional players who have not revealed themselves? If these guys are normal players who have one or two [Heart Core] on average, there will be at least another hundred players hiding somewhere, waiting for a chance to attack us.

What are you, some degenerate merchants searching for a totally innocent little girl?

_ Bandit leader: By the way, uh… What am I supposed to do now?

_ Bandit #2: Demand their surrender!

One would think these bandits are buying time, except that the rest of their players are sighing in exasperation instead of performing suspicious activities worth buying. Meanwhile, our magi in the back are quietly preparing buffs with [Silent Cast]. Unless all of them have an even higher tier skill that can hide spells' visual effects, these guys are practically buying time… for us.

_ Bandit leader: Right! You have walked right into our trap, suckers! We have you surrounded and outnumbered now! Leave the goods and the women…

Suddenly taking a pause in the middle of his speech, the cartoonish bandit awkwardly glances between what I assume to be his speech notes and the people he was referring to.

…This guy just couldn't stop digging his own grave, could he? In a way, the few women here are all gorgeous ladies embodying the values and ideals of , exactly as one spouting such lines would hope for. Heavily armed too, since they wouldn't be GUARDING this caravan otherwise.

Or to put it simply: Seduce one (or all of them) at your own risk.

Well, he seems to have realized that by himself, thanks to the expensive-looking armors and weapons. Or the [Alchemy] bomb juggling. Or the glares.

Probably the glares huh.

_ Bandit leader: …Sorry about that. I copied this speech from other games without checking.

_ Olkan: Uh… You guys sure you are up for this? We don't mind putting this off to another day.

So that he can muster an overwhelming force to murder them, is probably what he wanted to say, but decided not to~

_ Bandit leader: S-shut up! These NPCs are only here for this quest you know! Anyway, give me a second here…

We normally would just go on our merry way, but everyone is too shocked by the bombshell he just dropped without warning.

These are quest NPCs? Sure, it's normal to have a quest spawning an additional NPC or two depending on its content. However, this many NPCs in one quest is unheard of, unless these guys have many [Soul Core] containing the same quest for some reason. Even if that was the case, a quest to help bandit roleplayers conduct a raid was definitely not a thing before today. It wouldn't be far-fetched to assume that several more quests featuring PvP and/or less-than-heroic contents have been scattered across the game world, ready to prey on unwitting victims.

Sateri, are you sure you are not some evil deity feeding on players' pain and suffering…?

_ Bandit leader: This should do it. Alright, suckers, you are surrounded now! Leave the wagons here and turn tail! You wouldn't want your leader's daughter to get hurt now, would you? Bwahahahaha!

…Daughter?

Everyone looks as confused as me for a moment, not sure what the (supposedly) scary bandit is rambling about, or if he is copying some speech from somewhere without thoughts again.

And then, they collectively turn to me.

…Right. Among these ladies (except for ) with plenty of "assets", I'm the only one who fit the bill, aren't I…?

_ Olkan: Who the heck are you calling my daughter!!!

The feeling is mutual~

_ Bandit leader: *Scratches head* So uh… your sister?

_ Olkan: This girl with no chest is no sister of mine!!!

You are upset about that part?!

The bandit ponders a bit, then stares at the upset merchant in pure disgust while taking a step back.

_ Bandit leader: Your… lover?

Oh hell naw~

It was at this moment that he knew, he screwed up.

Brandishing a massive greatsword which screams "offense over defense!", the usually easygoing stares a hole through the insolent criminal in front of him with a burning fury.

_ Olkan: You dare question my devotion to nice chests? Let's see if your sword skills are as good as your mouth.

_ Bandit leader: Wait what?!

RIP bandits. It was (not) nice knowing you~

_ Olkan: No more talking! Everyone, CHARGE! FOR THE BOOBS!!!

_ Guards: In the name of boobs, CHARGEEEEE!!!

And so begins the Great Boobs War. Can I go now…?

____________

They certainly didn't expect the convoy to surrender to begin with, though the few bandit players really wish their idiotic leader would at least refrain from making it harder for all of them! Now they suddenly find themselves under [Alchemy] bombardment as the angry [BB Conglomerate] merchants rush in for a melee.

Led by a flying chair, wielding a greatsword, while chanting various war cries involving boobs, one way or another.

If there is even a next time, the bandit leadership will make sure to prepare a proper speech, preferably one that does not contain figurative ideological landmines for most people!

Soon enough, the two groups blend into a messy brawl with no way to discern the actual battle line. Whether they are blinded by rage or confident enough to fight in close-quarters combat, the supposedly guards just abandoned the wagons and went in straight for the kill, forgoing any support ranged attacks. This in turn forced the bandits to do the same as they couldn't fire into the main fighting force without risking friendly fire.

The recent events including constant urban PK attempts, free-for-all tournament prelims, and a battle royale under the Goddess' statue may or may not have further influenced their decision.

Amidst this chaos, the lead wagon with its three players break formation and park a distance from the battlefield. The perceptive bandit leader obviously notices them even if he is getting smacked around by a greatsword.

…Doesn't change the fact that he is still getting smacked around by a big fat sword though.

Thirty seconds into the fight, it becomes quite obvious to the bandits that they aren't exactly winning despite numerical superiority. When the enemies have healers and said healers are voluntarily smashing instead of healing, it's a sign that the battle plan needs to be revised.

How to change it is a problem in and of itself though. Believe it or not, banditry is not the line of work where you expect to get a power-up mid-fight. Any power-up, if there was any, would be better used in advance so that it wouldn't get to this point to begin with. Needless to say, last-second power of friendship is right out.

Since increasing their own fighting power is out of the question, that leaves him with decreasing that of the merchants. Debuffs are… not exactly available, not in a way that his group can compete against the opponents at least. It has to be something only his side can do, otherwise it wouldn't tip the scale in his favor.

Fortunately, being a (self-proclaimed) professional scoundrel with hundreds of destroyed caravan under his belt, the capable bandit leader has already figured out exactly what he should do!

See, even if these hot-tempered guards are neglecting their job, they will still be distracted if the goods they are protecting come under attack. By using a small but mobile detachment to kite the vulnerable targets behind the war zone, the merchants will have no choice but to divert a significant part of their force to shield said targets. This tactic will (hopefully) give an even better numerical advantage against the remaining enemies.

Of course it is not without risk, namely being shot at by magi and archers. In addition, attacking the wrong target may end up backfiring as their own combat-capable quest NPCs, who are standing by on the other end of the caravan, can and will be aggro-ed into the fight, undoing all his hard work. That is why, the genius tactician in him suggests a different approach:

Attack the kid.

…There is probably a reason why this guy is a bandit and not an actual tactician.

Nevertheless, it is not without reason. The merchant leader's …non-lover girl and her two escorts have been silently watching from the side this whole time, even though everyone else is out for blood. In other words, she must be so vulnerable, the other two have to be by her sides at all times no matter the circumstances. It's a mystery why such VIP is tagging along the caravan instead of skipping the journey altogether with [Recall]…

Wait, why are they happily eating lunchboxes now? Think of the atmosphere for a second, damn it!!!

A-anyway, the NPCs won't attack since the target is a player. Considering how (seemingly) important she is, many merchants will probably disengage to intervene. That increases the risk, so asking his own NPCs to do the kiting is out of the question. Those blockheads can barely hold the line, let alone doing sophisticated tasks like attacking while maintaining distance. Therefore, the bandit leader and his fellow player lacke… companions will have to take on this suicide mission!

It's totally not because such mission still has higher survival chance than his current situation of getting smacked, honest!

Quickly communicating the plan in party chat, the (self-proclaimed) ruthless bandit leader is aiming for his next target!

Now that he takes a better look at the girl, that sprout on her head with the half-transparent veil look awfully familiar. Have they met somewhere before? Or… maybe even an idol who is usually featured on TV (or in this case, game trailers)?

…Yeah right, as if that kind of cliché can happen in real (virtual) life. More like a déjà vu caused by the ongoing concussive smacking to his face!

____________

No matter how many times they are beaten back, the darkness shall return. The puny mortals of this world have no hope of eliminating this eternal threat, only prepare for its next intrusion.

Or at least, that was the original impression of it.

In the zone shadowed from the sun's radiant light, a heroic party of service workers cleave through the horde of darkness like hot knife through butter. Steeling the resolve in their hearts, the beautiful heroines are going to save the world once more!

…Is not what is going through their mind at all.

_ Thelia: This is just the normal spawn with different monsters!

As the sane woman of the party, the otome-protagonist delivery girl was the first to snap at the newly respawned "raid".

Even calling it a raid is an exaggeration at this point. If one uses [Detect Presence] to count the number of monsters in range, they wouldn't be able to differentiate between the normal hunting zone and the corruption raid, mainly because there's no difference. In fact, the monster levels are also the same, based on the numerous [Inspect] they have been doing.

In other words, it is less of a raid and more of a biome change of the same difficulty. And since it has the same difficulty as the original zone, the mobs can't really harm the OP party packing enough firepower to take on the edge of the world.

_ Linista: Everything seems to have maximum aggression so it's more effective to grind than a normal zone. Still, how are we going to provide Raid Breaker service if the enemies are so sparsely populated…?

And yet, the monster nerf leaves these veterans more troubled than any brutal lategame content can.

--- Topic: Pet control guide ---

## Deeply Intelligent

I was talking to @Newbie Charisma build and found out that a lot of players have some misconceptions about controlling your companions (the NPCs, not other players, in case you maniacs have some funny ideas), so here's a guide on how to do so:

- Voice command: The simpler but also more limited way to do it. Your pets can perform simple tasks (move, attack, defend, stay, use skills, etc…) when you tell them an order verbally. Use party chat if you don't want your enemies to hear you.

- Direct control: From the party menu, open your pet's context menu. There should be an option to directly control your pet like you would your avatar. Anything you can do, so can your pet using this method.

- Regarding NPCs: There is no option for direct control, so you can only use voice commands to manage them. EDIT: You cannot control domesticated pets (pets summoned by another pet) at all. Thanks @Teabag Master for reminding me.

##

## StoneHoarder

Wait, you can actually command them with voice chat?!

I always thought people were immersing themselves when they yelled out the orders in combat… ( ﾟ Дﾟ)

##

## Newbie Charisma build

Then there's me who never found the context menu and could not for the life of me figure out how some pets could have such precise movements! (*´▽｀*)

##

## Teabag Master

GJ @Deeply Intelligent. Just want to add that domesticated pets cannot be controlled, even by voice commands.

You don't have to use both methods either. Use whichever you are more comfortable with. Source: Our Black Mantis only occasionally call out commands verbally for immersion. Meanwhile our cavalry leader almost never touches direct control because it's too mentally taxing during melees.

##

## Mage of Sin

So… TLDR, die and reincarnate as your pet in your next life? (just kidding) (*^▽^*)

##

## Newbie Charisma build

I mean, dying does sound like a good way to command your pet without disruption… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

##

## Deeply Intelligent

Aside from the part that you are dead? I would advise against such strategy, if only because you lose all control of your pets when you die. They will cease all aggression and walk back to your corpse, and you cannot manually control them.

The only exception is some niche skills which activate on your death. Those should be used as last resort though.

##

## OP alchemist

Actually, the fact that such skills exist mean Sateri-chan expected us to come up with that kind of strategies! (ﾟヮﾟ)☞

##

------