The cute girl of the neighborhood, Shadyna, just got bullied, sad cry~
That genocidal bishop was the worst! The worst, I say! If all players had to rack up 500 kills to create a guild, the ecosystem would collapse by the end of this week!
Actually, we have no idea if one mob equals one charge for this [Hollow Guild Mark]. It might require 100 dead mobs for each charge for all I know!
_ Hessy: Since you proudly declared that, I suppose we won't be going out and exterminate wildlife?
_ Shadyna: I won't stop you if that's what you want to do, but for the guild quest, I do have something else in mind.
After all, that bishop revealed some critical information during our conversation: Players (dead ones, most likely) can fill up the quest item. Whether that was deliberate on Sateri's side, I have no idea. I fully intend to take advantage of that though.
_ Hessy: Should we evacuate then? In case you want to use that firestorm skill…
_ Shadyna: Why would I do that?! I am a pacifist you know!? I will only retaliate when attacked!
However, [Luminous Firestorm] is indeed a solution, considering how many players are gathering here…
Uh, everyone, why are you looking at me with such doubtful eyes~?
_ Hessy: Yeah right. So, what do we do?
_ Shadyna: Well~ In order to peacefully clear this quest, I will need a few signboards, some furniture, and a small house.
_ Everyone: A house?
Of course they will be surprised, as those aren't what you would need to commit 500 murders in quick succession, most of the time.
_ Su: Co-could it be… our love nest, at long last?! *Coughs a pool worth of blood*
How the heck did this rotten proprietress come to that conclusion?! And you are already dying from your own fantasies, how would you survive if that was really the case?!
Needless to say, her guess was totally off the mark. If I want that, I can always use our cafeteria's top floor, or Elri's house.
_ Elri: By the way,
_ Shadyna: Yes~?
_ Elri: You don't have to emphasize your pacifism every three sentences. Only idiots would believe it nowadays.
Sounds like more of a reason to up the brainwas… propaganda to me!
And my pacifism is an undeniable fact, okay?
____________
The guild hall of
If only all of them were ladies with ample chests, the guildmaster would happily serve them 24/7. However, the degenerates here do not have such chests. In fact, they aren't even ladies!
The usual busty receptionists aren't at their posts either. It couldn't be helped, since they are guild managers, and have more important issues to handle than being ogled by perverts right now.
_ Olkan: I am being surrounded by goddesses…
As such, they are all in the guildmaster's office. To share the same space with three beauties whose busts are on the verge of bursting out of their physics-defying clothes,
_ Manager #1: Sure, guildmaster. The merchants outside are petitioning to waive this week's rent due to Sateri-chan's occupation of the marketplace.
_ Manager #2: No way, no how. We are already strapped for cash as it is. Our peasa… tenants will revolt if we don't reimburse them for the sudden relocation soon.
_ Manager #3:
_ Olkan: Why are you all only talking about money during my happy hour?!
The managers look at each other, then simultaneously respond as if it was completely normal.
_ Managers: Because we are merchants?
_ Olkan: Of course you are! But can't you at least show some affection?!
_ Manager #1: You can have it once you do your job as the guildmaster first.
_ Olkan: My job isn't printing money out of thin air!!!
And here he was wondering why his managers suddenly gathered in his office at the same time. Of course it wouldn't be because they wanted to confess to him!
_ Manager #3:
_ Olkan: What else am I supposed to do when you three just barged in and ask for absurd amounts of money?!
_ Linista: *Sighs* Can't be helped then. Please forward me the reports.
It was the usual scene in the office.
_ Fuelri: Why are you sending it to me as well?! Let's see… Uwa, what the hell is with these expenses?! Our guildmaster is the type that buys a house to do a quest, but yours is on a whole different level.
_ Manager #3: I know right?
_ Olkan: It wasn't my fault! How could I expect… Wait, why are you here,
It was about time he realized the presence of the two "outsiders" in the room. Old habits are surprisingly hard to get rid of.
_ Linista: I have something to discuss with you.
_ Olkan: Worry not! I have been thinking of your chest every day, and not once have I ever thought about rejecting your inevitable return!
While the managers just stare at the depraved guildmaster in pure disgust, the elven knight brandishes her halberd and starts bashing his head in without the slightest hesitation.
_ Olkan: Ow ow ow! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! My thoughts kinda slipped there!
_ Fuelri: Worry not, my hands just slipped too!
_ Olkan: Don't say "slipped" when you are still deliberately smashing meeeeeeeee!!!
After all,
_ Linista: Big words for someone who hasn't contacted me this whole time.
_ Manager #1: *Sighs* Guildmaster…
_ Olkan: Don't block me in PM if you want me to contact you!!!
_ Linista: Eh…? Ah, right, you kept PM-ing me after I left so I blacklisted you the same day.
_ Fuelri: Uwa…
_ Olkan: Your negligence really hurts,
_ Linista: Not really.
*Wham*
Such was the sound of
_ Linista: I get to play with my old party, and I am going to be engaged soon…
*WHAM*
Somehow, he managed to facedesk harder this time. The desk still standing is nothing short of a miracle, considering the impacts it just withstood.
_ Linista: Then there are employee benefits…
_ Fuelri: You can stop now. He's not moving anymore.
You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.
Although
_ Linista: Right… I am here to buy my bar back. Since I am helping you out, I'll take it as my payment, deal?
_ Managers: Deal.
_ Fuelri: So fast!
_ Olkan: My bar!!!
_ Managers: You be quiet.
_ Fuelri: Uh… Are you sure you want to trade a whole building for her advice?
Even though the deal is in her favor,
_ Manager #1: Because if we decline, we will drown in poverty, and she will somehow get the bar over our dead bodies in the end!
When
_ Linista:
_ Fuelri: Sure, no problem.
Without further ado, she walks out of the office. In the first place, she wasn't in the management team of
_ Linista: Make a "We are all in this together" excuse to shut a good part of them up for a while. For the tenants, suggest that they share house and rent with the merchants if possible. I'll need to go over the expansion plan with
Scary.
____________
_ Shadyna: Mister, I would like to buy a liquid that inflicts [Poison]!
While Elri and Linny are on a journey to acquire a house, Hessy and Su are back at the cafeteria to craft the furniture I asked for.
Me? I am on a shopping trip with
Having said that, we have done nothing but getting lost in the new shopping district until now! There are too many buildings in the way, I can't find the shop I want from a distance like before.
And I worked so hard to remember the positions of the shops I frequented in the old marketplace too…
_ Merchant: [Poison], isn't it? Wait a minute, I need to find it in the mountain of boxes.
You have my sympathy. Moving from the marketplace to here on short notice must have been rough.
_ Falyn: Owner, can't you just blast everything using that buff item exploit?
_ Shadyna: I can, but that isn't very pacifist-like. And it's tedious.
_ Falyn: Mostly because it's tedious huh.
Don't mind the little details~
_ Falyn: Well, taking it easy once in a while is fine too. Reminds me of the time when we fooled around in closed beta.
Flashback time? It's flashback time right~?
_ Falyn: Then again, I'm sure there will be plenty of fooling around together as long as you are here, owner.
But what about the flashback?!
_ Shadyna: Your team is not going anywhere you know? Me being here or not.
If I remember correctly,
_ Falyn: Hmm? No, I'm talking about Hessy and Linny and Su. We used to be in the same party, but parted ways when the big guilds turned on each other, until recently of course.
_ Shadyna: …Eh? EH?!
I knew my managers, except for Elri, were acquaintances, but I didn't think they had such close relationships!
I should tell Elri to flirt with Hessy more. We latecomers need to do better in order to catch up!
…
_ Shadyna: Umm… Pretty sure I asked for a small house…
To be exact, I asked for a small plot of land or house that is at least 4x4 meter in size. For some reason, Elri brought me to a night club instead!
I am not old enough in-game to enter this kind of place to begin with!
_ Elri: …Sorry.
Un, she's turning away. Definitely guilty.
I doubt my sane mentor here was crazy enough to buy it on her own volition. That means the mastermind was Linny. Elri, being a pushover, was probably caught in the flow, agreed to Linny's marriage proposal, and bought this building for their honeymoon.
Even though she already had Hessy. Sigh~
_ Falyn: I'm starting to understand why Hessy said you always seemed to get everything both right and wrong at the same time.
How rude~
_ Elri: Uh, let's get this over with. You don't need the full building right?
_ Shadyna: Un! A small room is fine!
_ Elri: Follow me.
I wonder if my managers planned to do something with the rest of the building? Looking forward to it~
_ Tied up jerk bishop: Praaaaaaaaaaay, my children, for your faith will become the power to repel the darkness!
Definitely NOT looking forward to this guy's rambling however.
…
_ Shadyna: And I shall call this… The Confession Room!
_ Hessy: …It is a torture room.
Conclusion: Hessy has no imagination whatsoever!
In the room Linny gave us, I dug a shallow hole in the middle and filled it with [Toxic water], a green glowing liquid found in deeper parts of the swamp that deals [Poison] damage if you step in it. The surface only reaches my ankle, by the way.
Then, I pushed the bishop NPC into the poisonous puddle. I originally wanted to throw him, but decided not to because [Mancannon] might destroy the house.
Last but not least, we built a cage around him, to make sure he cannot escape. Although it's not possible while I am still around to cast [Binding roots], I have better things to do. The cage is as strong as the town walls so good luck breaking it, evil laugh echoing~
_ Shadyna: A bishop in a tight enclosed space, hence the name "Confession Room"! He is constantly preaching and players come to him to talk about their (guild-related) problems on top of it!
Un, I don't think anyone can mistake this place for anything else, apart from the cage, the lack of exit, and the poisonous pool. Well, little details~
_ Elri: So, your goal is…
_ Shadyna: Have him die from poison, use [Resurrection] to bring him back to life, repeat until we complete the quest~!
_ Everyone: Uwa…
Everyone is admiring my pacifism~… Probably not. Sigh~
_ Jerk bishop: When all was lost, the Sun Goddess appeared before mankind. Her light shiiiiiiiiiined through the ni… Guh!
Aaaaaaaaaaand he dropped dead from poison overdose. Wait, can one even overdose on poison?
But more importantly, as I check the [Hollow Guild Mark] in my inventory, its number has increased to 1/500.
Ufufu… just as I expected. If both mobs and players count, there's no reason to think NPC, who are practically players controlled by Sateri, would be an exception.
Welcome to your personal hell, Mister Jerkass Bishop. I will be your guide!
_ Hessy: I expected a lot of deaths when you said you would complete the quest the pacifist way, but to think you would commit war crimes…
_ Shadyna: How mean~ It is not war crime if there is no war to begin with!
_ Hessy: That is not a problem here!
That is the very definition of war crimes though…
Somehow, the bishop NPC is standing up again, even though no one has used [Resurrection] on him.
_ Jerk bishop: The Goddess's liiiiiiiiight protects me from aaaaaaaall adversaries!
…Not only is this guy annoying, he is also the type that refuses to die when killed. Sateri, may I suggest choosing a more tolerable character to spread your teachings…?
The bishop continues his speech about Sateri's greatness for a few seconds, then dies and gets resurrected again. Apparently, his HP after being resurrected is only a small fraction of his max HP.
Wait, isn't this pretty convenient? If he keeps getting up on his own, I can do the quest without lifting a finger.
Preparing this whole setup required a lot of literal lifting, sure, but that doesn't count, okay?
_ Hessy: He is a special NPC without [Soul Core], so instead of dying for good, he is automatically revived huh…
_ Falyn: His immortality changed from a blessing to a curse of eternal suffering… Still, owner, isn't this still a lot of murdering using exploits?
_ Shadyna: It's not.
_ Falyn: It's not?
_ Shadyna: Un. For one, it is not an exploit as I used [Binding roots] and [Poison] exactly as they were intended. I am not "murdering" either. It's preemptive self-defense, applied over and over again!
Uh, everyone, why are you facepalming? That is rude you know~?
_ Falyn: Eh… That bishop has not attacked you.
_ Shadyna: He attacked me, personally!
And I took offense to that!
_ Elri: That's not how self-defense works you maniac!!!
Please don't mind the little details~
____________
The maid café is undergoing their first crisis.
Which is a surprise, considering the place having been in the red the whole time. Such is the perk of being backed up financially by a whole alliance.
Said alliance isn't here to save them from the beautiful but crazy waitress who just came in uninvited though.
_ Vulkerzelianna Merashiel: Pardon our intrusion~ This is a hos~tile~ takeover~
Following her is the handsome (?) bartender whose hobby is playing with ladies' hearts (in
_ Helen: Good day to you. As my partner here just said, we are here for a hostile takeover.
Everyone, including the maids across the counter, were speechless.
_ Vulkerzelianna Merashiel: Hmm~ Should I say that again until your thick skull get it~? Hostile, takeover, understood~?
_ Depraved maid: Are you calling us stupid you arrogant devious woman?!
_ Vulkerzelianna Merashiel: Oh my~ It appears that you aren't as dumb as legends say. My apologies.
_ Depraved maid: Legends? A-am I famous now? Ehehe~
_ Helen: You ju~st had to prove her right, didn't you?
_ Vulkerzelianna Merashiel: Well then~ Since you are capable of understanding human language… Please become our sub~
_ Depraved maid: Aren't you just saying the same thing in different ways?!
While the two crazy people are bickering (kind of), the kind maid is still tirelessly and silently making sure the few guests are served in time.
Totally not because the womanizer has set her eyes on another victim.
_ Helen: My cute kitten, do you happen to have a room for us to discuss in private?
The kind maid pauses for a second, then puts down the mug in her hand with a long sigh.
_ Kind maid: I was hoping you two would leave me alone if I kept silent.
_ Helen: Even if you did, your kind and hardworking nature still shines brightly like the sun you know~?
It was so cheesy, the patrons were reminded of their own dark history and begin writhing in agony as a result.
_ Kind maid: *Sighs* Follow me. And please refrain from speaking.
_ Helen: Eh~
Ignoring the crazy couple over there, the saner (?) pair go to the back of the café, away from prying eyes, where they can discuss their business in peace.
Nothing suspicious will happen behind the door, definitely.
--- Topic: Guild NPC missing? ---
## Mage of Sin
We just completed our guild quest, but somehow the quest giver NPC is gone? o_0
Is it because of our quest progress that we cannot see him, or did something happen?
##
## Newbie Charisma build
The guild creation quest right? Just activate the guild mark to initiate banner crafting and you are done.
If you need that guy for the guild clerk/steward quest, follow the new direction signs around the marketplace. He has been relocated for some reason.
##
## Mage of Sin
Many thanks. m(_ _)m
Black Mantis was behind us when we talked to him, so I feared she might have decimated him somehow. (^_^;)
##
## Flame knight of Darkness
About that… [Pic]
Pretty sure he prefers being decimated right now. (._.)
You can still talk to him, although him dying every few seconds is a bit distracting.
##
## Manly Warrior
How in the name of Sateri-chan did he end up like that?! ( ̄□ ̄;)
Replace that poison with lava and he would be in a literal hell on earth!
##
## Flame knight of Darkness
Personally speaking, I would be more concerned about Black Mantis and her friends casually having a tea party behind him…
She said she used poison instead of lava to avoid destroying his corpse, in case you really want to know… (・_・;)
##
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