The young chef Shadyna is in the biggest crisis of her life!
I have been stabbed!
_ Shadyna: W-why…?
As suddenly as he appeared, the dog-eared man pulled the knife out of my neck. If this was real life it would have required a lot of mosaic to censor.
_ Assailant: Nothing personal, kid. Rest in peace.
I was careless. To think someone would take advantage of a hole in my usual schedule, when I have no bodyguard…
However…
_ Shadyna: You just dealt single-digit damage! Use that line after I am actually dead!!!
I doubt the attack even got through my defense. It was just the [Ignore Physical Defense] that actually did anything to my HP.
By the time I finish the sentence, my HP has been restored completely. Only the little simulated pain of being pricked remains.
_ Assailant: A formidable opponent. However, you will soon succumb to the [Poison] in my blade.
_ Shadyna: Say that after I am actually inflicted with [Poison]!!!
Like other status effects, there are visual effects when our avatars are poisoned. I think it's a greenish glow with air bubbles? Not that I am well-versed in delivering long and painful deaths through [Poison] per se.
_ Assailant: Huh… So long then!
Now he's legging it?!
_ ???: Do not bully little girls, damn arrogant delusional child abusing piece of trash!
He did not make it to the stairs before receiving an [Elemental Bolt] to the face, which is followed by a full barrage of spells from all elements. Talk about overkill, physically and mentally…
As the attacker falls to the ground as lifeless as one could be, the brutal murderers make their appearance. A bunch of little girls with a wide array of fashion senses. Their atmosphere hasn't changed much at all huh, these
_ Vladina: Little Sprout, isn't it a bit rude to judge your benefactors like that?
Welp~ This gothic girl is sharp as always.
_ Shadyna: Hiyo,
_ Vladina: We will be using this room here. Mind standing still for a bit? Small as we are, I still don't think we can slip past that baggage of yours.
It's not that the corridor is narrow. It's the cart filled with crates I am pulling indoors that is too big. I couldn't help it, okay? Any smaller and I would have needed to create a train!
Next time I'll just use the ground floor…
Also, are you girls just going to step on him to get over here like that? Shouldn't you at least ask him what the heck that assassination attempt was all about?
_ Vladina: You can join us too, just saying~
_ Shadyna: I refuse~
A young girl with trademark fluffy hair and pointy ears climbs over the wooden boxes to make herself seen. I only noticed because she's coughing blood all over the containers! Don't do manual labor if you risk death doing it! Or is that a new way to invoke [Transmutation]?
_ Su: Are you seriously flirting with MY wife while I am around?! Get in the queue, you damn lecherous insatiable lolicon!
Who's your wife?! What queue?! And did you just describe yourself?!
_ Vladina: GUH! Thank you very much! You can join us too, honey.
_ Su: I have to decline. Money and information are waiting.
Materialism is working hard today as well!
And yes, I am in the cafeteria, hence the lack of dedicated bodyguards around me. "Dedicated" being the keyword.
…I would appreciate it if the teahouse girls pushing the cart back there had come to my rescue though. Then again they probably didn't understand what we were talking about, with the crates blocking the view.
_ Vladina: Aw… Just be careful, 'kay? The new guilds are making their move.
Casually leaving scary warnings as if foreshadowing plot twists, the
Su, don't reinforce that behavior by waving back at them. I know you were one of them, but still…
_ Su: Let us continue,
Sure thing, but are we going to just ignore that dead guy who had attacked me for no reason, got revived and is now being dragged downstairs by Mera?
…Wait, what? What are you doing, Mera?! And don't just silently wink and smile at us! Su, cease that "I'm counting on you" thumbs up! That guy is not a usual patron. He's not going to survive whatever you are going to do to him!
____________
On the arid grassland where tall grass spreads in all directions, a group of players on their mounted beasts are casually marching across the field…
_ Fuelri: A change of pace every once in a while is nice, isn't it? But make sure to maintain formation no matter what.
The delivery girls following the young elf don't seem to share that sentiment however.
_ Thelia: Elri, why are we… sightseeing like this?
_ Fuelri: We are not sightseeing. This is practice so we can move as one.
Even though it's only a party of five, the girls are forming a proper line together, with
The cavalry unit of the cafeteria has become a reality, all thanks to the elf's suggestion after being introduced to the speed demons who deliver food to the frontlines on a daily basis.
_ Thelia: I honestly thought we will be doing something more… extreme, now that we are cavalry…
_ Fuelri: The Crater zone has a lot of rough terrain and steep slopes. Do you want us to practice there instead?
_ Thelia: I am really sorry for being arrogant!
The elven knight has little regards for herself, but is surprisingly considerate of others' well-being. Until she starts charging, that is.
____________
Hessy, Su, and I are going through the list one last time.
Storage, check. Kitchen, check. Cashier counter, check. Cute shopkeepers, many checks!
Un, let's get star…
*BLAM*
I haven't said anything though?!
Somehow, a suspicious-looking party managed to kick open our door, completely ignoring that the poor thing was open in the first place… Maybe I should make an [Alchemy] door that explodes on damage…?
As for why I know they are of the same party… Well, given that all five of them are wearing the same maid outfits, the chance of them being strangers to each other is about as high as Sateri dropping a meteor in my face: Infinitesimal.
…She's not going to do that, right?
What do a party of maids have against our door? Are they Hessy's new victi… friends?
_ Hessy: Just for the record, I do not know those girls.
Then they are acquaintances of
They are not drawing weapons as they walk to us, so they are at the very least probably not hostile. These players sure are drawing attention of the degenerates though.
Today has been nothing but weirdoes huh.
They stop a few steps away from us. The maid in the middle, presumably the leader, walks to Hessy.
Uwa, this person is seriously making a smug face. It's the self-proclaimed rival cliché~
I wonder if Elri is still after Hessy's behind these days… They usually quarrel but I have not seen her face-first on the floor again after our first meeting…
Reading on Amazon or a pirate site? This novel is from Royal Road. Support the author by reading it there.
What are they, an old couple?
_ Smug Maid: Greetings,
…Who?
Not only me, but pretty much everyone has the same puzzled expression. For someone who are supposedly famous, you girls aren't even recognized by the perverted patrons who are the most informed in this kind of stuff!
_ Smug Maid: We opened shop in the southern part of Tyrel, where the old pizza restaurant was. As we will be putting you out of business, you might want to know who we are to surrender to! So, here we are!
Oh~ Direct competitors, these people are. We were a monopoly for some time so I completely forgot about other [Cooking] players… Welp.
Having these maids now of all time is bad for me though. Couldn't they choose another day?
And remind me where the pizza restaurant was again? Although Elri's house is also in the area, I never had the chance to visit the place until now…
_ Smug Maid: Can you relay a message to your owner?
For a second, Hessy glanced at me then turned back to the smug maid. How did she do that with such a straight face?!
Background patrons, stop your facepalming. You are ruining Hessy's attempt to pretend that I am not three steps away from her!
_ Hessy: No guarantee, but feel free to say what you must.
Well, the harsh waitress is not going to waste her time delivering a message to someone who is listening to the whole thing in real time…
_ Smug Maid: Of course! Here goes… "You can forcefully take
…DEGENERATE!!! This one is a depraved criminal on the loose! What unimaginable stuff are you rambling about?! I haven't done anything to my friends, except for experimental crafting and extreme skill unlocking, and those have nothing to do with my virtual race!
And don't think I did not notice that last sentence, you crazy maid!
Even Hessy, who deals with weirdos for the majority of her work hours, is silently backing away while staring at the depraved maid in pure disgust.
_ Depraved Smug Maid: That is all. Dear customers, I am looking forward to your patronage from here on out. We have a discount during our grand opening so please drop by!
Doing an elegant curtsy as if the whacky declaration just now was a lie, the maids leave our cafeteria as quickly as they came.
…What the heck was that all about, seriously…
For some reason, the maid standing on the far right came to me instead. Is this a dangerous person as well?
_ Dangerous (?) Maid: My apologies for our leader's stupidity.
Harsh! You are her friend, aren't you?!
She leaves a few candies on the counter then turns around to leave. What is this cute socially awkward personality?!
_ Shadyna: W-wait!
_ Not Dangerous Maid: Yes?
Since she was nice in her own way, especially compared to the other one, I will give her a gift she cannot refuse!
_ Shadyna: Will you sample our new products?
____________
Entering the tavern,
_ Maximus: Yo.
_ Ignar: Yo, what's with this crowd?
_ Maximus: The brat is at it again.
_ Tippe: She's giving out food, for free!
Ordering the usual meals they eat before a boss hunt, the party listens to the only waitress working at the counter. The rest are helping
To ensure equal competition between the teams, all four of the food shops have their main kitchens on the ground floor. The upper floors are reserved as private rooms for richer customers of the teahouse and bar. Their warehouse is in the basement, and no outsider has set foot in the top floor. There have been rumors of a research on weapons for world destruction, but
After all, the Illusive Sprout does not need research labs to make such weapons.
_ Inerin: Where to start… a few days ago,
On the counters are several baskets filled with small dumplings around the size of one's hand. Judging from the signs behind them, each basket is a different flavor. There's meat, fish, veggies, fruit, and others. What a wide variety of choices, yet they all have the same name…
_ Ignar: That's a lot of crazy people.
It appears that they have cleared out the kitchens of the other three shops just to have enough space for the long queues. Not that they have any spare player to work when all hands are on deck. The pizza chefs are nowhere to be seen though.
_ Sulien: One [Fishy Dumpluck] per customer only! Please return to the end of the line if you want another one~
_ Maximus: What the hell is that name?
It sounds… dubious, think the party in their minds.
_ Inerin: All of the materials were fish she caught in the last few days, changed to other types by [Alchemy]'s [Transmutation]. The lower-level ones were strengthened by [Purification]. Everything of those dumplings is fish.
The crowd there probably did not hear the explanation, so they were spared, for now.
_ Tippe: Isn't that enough to grind both skills? Why is she making food as well?
_ Inerin: She also wanted to play around with [Spicing], it seems.
Because [Spicing] changes food randomly, the best way to learn how all of its effects and limits is, unsurprisingly, using it on food. Many, many times.
The two little girls of the teahouse behind
Those girls are not only listing all the possible effects. They are probably finding the statistics behind those effects as well. That's what
Which also explains why they won't make a dumpling and just use [Spicing] over and over again. She will need to do all the note-taking and crafting at the same time, which is exhausting, so she delegated the crunching part to the ones who make a living from it.
_ Mage: HERE GOES NOTHING! *Chomps*
A mage chows down the food in his hand… and drops dead on the spot.
_ Dead mage: YES! I died!
_ Warrior: Lucky bastard! Go die!
He just did, literally.
At another queue, a victim is frantically running back to the end of the line after his turn. Despite the valiant flailing around, he is moving at a snail's pace.
_ Victim (?): Damn it, damn it all! Will someone kill me please?!
_ Next-in-line: No way dude.
_ Ignar: I'm not sure I want to know but… what's with them?
_ Inerin: [Spicing] is random, but it allows stronger buffs than [Cooking]. When it is NOT giving stronger attribute buffs… It is possible to go negative. Combined with possible HP damage effect… well, those guys happen. The dead guys can respawn to remove the food effect to try again so it is a better outcome than getting "buffed" to uselessness.
In other words, it's a lottery. The winner receives a massive buff, which is undoubtedly powerful because
Players who received nasty penalties but not dead are at last place, and no one wants to put them out of their misery since the queues are already way too long. They have to wait until it is possible to eat again after 15 minutes, or try to wing it with predictably horrible results. Just as medicines can be poisons,
And that is an assessment from the guy with the strongest known debuffs in-game, the owner of the [Night] sword.
_ Maximus: Heh, that's just because those idiots eat the food themselves. If that brat was throwing it like she did to her pet she would lose her [Pacifist] title in no time.
Seeing the little sprout girl killing players en masse brings back quite a few unpleasant memories for the kidnapper party, even after she was nerfed on almost all aspects…
_ Inerin: Actually…
The waitress pulls out a small dumpling with a smile.
_ Inerin: She asked me to test this out to see if it would count to her records. Would you like to try?
_ Tippe: …Let me get this straight. You are asking us to die.
_ Inerin: That is a highly probable consequence.
_ Tippe: And in the worst case,
As it is right now,
It should be reminded that "relatively" is the keyword.
_ Inerin: I am certain you misspelled "best case".
_ Maximus: WHO THE HECK WOULD DO THAT?!
_ Tippe: GLADLY!
--- Topic: Operation Sprout Roulette discussion ---
## Fire mage of Justice
Due to popular demand, the free food distribution in the cafeteria now has an unofficial name: Operation Sprout Roulette.
Please discuss it here from now on. The other threads will be archived eventually.
- Location: Tyrel's one and only cafeteria. Follow the queues if you don't know where to start.
- Description: Illusive Sprout (Shouldn't we change to Black Mantis by now?) is giving out her handmade food for free. Go grab one if you are feeling lucky, because the name is that for a reason.
- Reason: Hell if I know. Will update once someone in the café contact me.
EDIT: If you have skill scrolls or skill-granting sets for buffs/debuffs, tell her. She will give you a treat.
##
## Serious Mage
The buff is …OP, simply put. [Pic]
It's like pre-nerfed Cooking and Alchemy, but even stronger!
##
## OP alchemist
Yup. Don't be fooled by the appearance. It is a full Cooking, Alchemy and skill buff in one package. If you don't get maimed horribly by Spicing, you will be able to do a lot with it.
Got mine after three attempts. Anyone up for party?
##
## Deeply Intelligent
…And Black Mantis is letting us have it for free? Surely she is a kind person who is doing society a favor. (~_~)
What's the catch?
##
## Flame knight of Darkness
Inspect does not work on the dumplings for unknown reasons. You have to eat it to find out. (ーー;)
Just a quick list of potential "fun" effects I have seen while waiting in line:
- Instant death
- Lightning strike, followed by instant death
- Combustion, followed by… you get the idea
- Poison, followed by a quick death
- A knight running at the speed of a car but has no PAT nor MAT
- A rogue sleeping on the spot and has to be physically kicked out to make way
- No MP mage build
- Bulky dude with a hammer getting yeeted to the ceiling
Illusive Sprout/Black Mantis does NOT screw around.
##
## Newbie Charisma build
You can always try again after 15 minutes, or death. (≧∇≦)/
It is dangerous, but all you lose is time and some dignity. She might need to remove the ones with bad effects if she is thinking about selling this though.
@OP alchemist: Come to the tavern counter. All "winners" are to form new parties there, to save precious time.
##
## Silver Merchant
Someone saw her putting some into a basket behind the counter and demanded to eat those. She agreed on the condition that he eat it outside of town.
Result: He exploded, along with the indestructible gate she built the other day. The adjacent walls were also heavily damaged.
She WAS removing the ones with bad effects, even if just the worst ones to avoid collateral damage. orz
##
## Heaven Piercer
Who could have thought little sisters' cooking was this dangerous?
MY BODY IS READY!!! (*°∀°)=3
##
## Maximus Archery
Stop eating, you brainless idiots. You are helping her becoming stronger.
Also, reported. Damn lolicon.
##
## Manly Warrior
@Maximus Archery: That's impossible. Look at the number of players gathering at the tavern.
On topic, I got debuffed in everything except HP. (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
She is also giving you an additional dumpling per turn if you give her a buff/debuff skill scroll (HP to PAT for example). Go for it if you have some to spare.
##
## StoneHoarder
Also guaranteed no ill-effect dumplings for lending armor sets with those skills. Source: Just did, and I feel like I can take on the world! ヽ(`Д´)ﾉ
It was so chaotic, no one read the signs. Spread the word, everyone!
##
## Deeply Intelligent
So her aim was the skills?
@Maximus Archery: You are most likely correct, but it's already too late. RIP.
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