Ah, how wonderful it is to have good minions. You can do many things with minions. For example, you can use them to distract the gate guards while you nugi-nugi your Tie'sha to pass the time. Then, you can also leave them behind to talk to the guards about what happened with boner lord lars rick so that you don't have to bother. I used the same trick in Weimar to great effect and even though there are more guards this time around, my minions have also multiplied.

And get this! You can even send out your minions to scout for candy apple vendors! Awawa.

Unfortunately, Grom, butlerman and the mustache guy from the boner fight have been engaged by the enemy, so I will have to suspend my plans to eat candy apples in front of Grom to punish him.

For now, I must be content with my minor snacks. Maybe it's a good thing, because it seems Áithne and Hal are familiar with Lalaromp and can show me around to where the best food is.

By the way, I have recovered the bigly big bag of goodies that I received from Ren-kun's family and I am currently holding it and grinning from ear to ear, staring eagerly ahead down the street and drooling a little bit. People are walking and talking and shopping and a few look at me askance, but Tie'sha gently rubs me down with her cyan cerviette like a pro, rubby dubby begone slobby! Don't drool like a tool! Even though I am a ghoul! Fufufu, I am making a new album. This time it's hippity hoppity style! Yes, you heard right. It's time for Alyce-chan to get home with the downies!

Ahen.

I cannot see a candy apple vendor, but maybe that is okay. After all, my current main objective is to acquire cotton candy. There is no way that this world doesn't have cotton candy, alright? The ancient chinese civilization had it, so there is definitely no way that my wonderland doesn't have cotton candy! I will not accept such a reality, you hear me system-chan?! Don't make me start a new band called System-chan of a down!

Ahen.

“Say, Tie'sha.” Hal asks. “Why is Lady Alyce muttering to herself and clearing her throat repeatedly?”

“Eh... maybe it's...” Tie'sha trails off, looking my way. Yes, my fluffy maid!

I nod seriously. “Halfdan wildbob, it is clearly because I am casting a very tough spell called where is the cotton candy, goddamn it!” I say.

They just stare at me, so perhaps my explanation isn't sufficiient. Let's try again.

“ Halloween wiferub, maybe you can help track down the cotton candy?” I ask, sincerely, cocking my head to the side and looking up at the red-haired half-elf Rurouni kenshin wannabe. He looks confused, and points to himself quietly.

“Yes, you! Or maybe seaweed-chan knows where we can obtain the fluffy goodness?”

Hal still looks confused, but I don't know why. I think I properly remembered his name. I did, didn't I? Ah, it doesn't matter. He is not my main snack anyway, he is seaweed-chan's main snack.

Áithne, on the other hand, looks thoughtful. “If I remember correctly, there was a confectionary near the main square, right Hal?”

“Ye-yes, I think so. Near the Church of Titon?” Hal replies.

“Un, that's the one! Let's go there! Lady Alyce is buying, right?” Áithne says, beaming an adorable smile my way and twirling her hair around a finger.

“Ah, seaweed-chan, how devious of you! But fear not, for the magnanimous overloli has a big bag of money to spend on cotton candy and other delishyas things. Therefore, I will pay, okay? Let's go, lead the way! Yay!” I say, jumping up and down filled with gaiety.

Áithne forcefully grabs Hal's hand, leading the way. After a few steps, I reach over and Grab Tie'sha's hand, following behind them. As we walk, something occurs to me.

Didn't they just say... church? As I am pondering this, we turn a corner and come out into a huge square! It's really wide.

There are street performers juggling and playing tricks, kids kicking a ball around, stalls full of food and nick-nacks and snacks. But the thing that really catches my eye, is the enormous, dominating white cathedral that takes up nearly half the square, sprawling there like a fat marshmellow.

Marble steps lead up to two huge doors that are invitingly thrown open, and outside the gate I see two priest-like figures clad in white robes, their heads shaved bald. One of them is a woman, I think, although she looks more like a goblin than a human. Hopefully, she is not going to say 'my precious', how horrible that would be for her husband when they are in bed.

Ahen.

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“It's there, you see?” Áithne says enthusiastically, pointing at a small cozy-looking building next to the huge marshmellow cathedral. “Hal, come on! Candy for the first time in months... after... so long in the dungeon...” Suddenly, seaweed-chan tears up, and Hal comforts her with a quick hug.

We start braving the many street performers, the sea of children playing, and the many street vendors. Once we are halfway across the square, I freeze.

Oh...

“Seaweed-chan, did you say that this was the church of Titon?” I ask.

“Yup! Many go to get his blessing every day for the Kul Malador, temple of the damned. It's a high-level undead dungeon, but the first floors are easy and it gets progressively more difficult. It spans the lowest rank all the way up to B rank. Lots of people use it to level, but since undead stink and have debuffs like disease and rot, Titon's blessing helps them fight.” Áithne says.

“Hey now, not all undead stink, right Tie'sha?” I ask. Both Áithne and Hal turn to look at us. Tie'sha nods hesitantly. “Ye-yes...su...some undead... smell nice.” Tie'sha says, her face going red.

I tried to resist, HNNG, but it was futile. I must hug her and nugi-nugi! Just a little bit. Just a quick fix! I am not a nugi-nugi addict, okay? Goddamn it!

After a short burst of nugi-action, I manage to calm down my heavy breathing and disengage from my cute maid. Tie'sha looks a bit dishevelled, but it's her fault for being such a flirt, saying I smell nice. By the way, I am not bothered by the stares from the people in the public square.

Before the two minor snacks can ask about Tie'sha's experience with undead that smell nice, I push forward with my new plan.

“Can you three go and buy lots and lots of candy from the shop? I would like to go as well, but I want to investigate the church so we will split up our operations. Agent Tie'sha, I entrust you with this magical bag that increases the drop-rate for candy!” I say, and hand Tie'sha the huge bag full of gold coins and jewelry from the Corneliáves house.

“My lady, I'm scared to carry around so much gold. Besides, why would you want to investigate an anti-undead church?” Tie'sha asks.

“I'll tell you later. For now, go buy me some candy! And make sure to get lots and lots. Overwhelming sugarness! Go for it! Make the sweet tooth ache! Make Seaweed-chan faint from sugar overload! Go forth and prepare the delishyas kingdom for me!” I say, waving my hand enthusiastically.

“Oh yeah, I'll send Raven-chan as a guard. Then I can also easily find you if I get lost. Not that I would ever get lost! My sense of direction is legendary, after all. Yes yes. I will lend you the GPS since I definitely don't need it! How great of me! Fufufu.” I say, quickly summoning Raven-chan.

It surprises a few people, and a street magician with a black top-hat is giving me the evil eye as though I've out-done him. Oi, it's not my fault you're shit! Although I don't want the kids to focus on me since I am not a mere street performer. I am the legendary Lolician! Okay, I will help you out.

I summon a second Raven-chan inside the hat of that magician guy in the hope that it will redirect attention to him. The great Lolician must go stealth mode to infiltrate the church, so this should prove an adequate distraction for me to slip away.

Unfortunately, the black top-hat is a bit too small for a Raven-chan liutenant, so his hat gets torn apart. With wide, shocked eyes, he falls on his butt. The children clap enthusiastically, and I take this moment to activate the Alyce-chan stealth mode getaway, disappearing into the crowd like I am playing assassin's creed. Ah, if I climb to the roof of the church, I wonder if there will be a haystack for me to dive into?

Ahen.

Having successfully distracted the plebs on the street and sent my minions out to gather resources to bring back to my base so I can build the delishyas kingdom, I redirect my attention to the church of Titon and its imposing facade. I can't help but smile faintly as I walk up to the steps.

This is the house of the bastard that cursed me with 50% decreased stats during the day. I wonder if he is home? Let's pay him a visit.

When I set foot on the first step, it somehow feels a bit heavy, like the air is pressing down on me. I ignore it and continue up the steps until I come before the precious lady-goblin and the monk of shining baldness.

“Good day my fellow believers.” I say with a gentle smile as I walk up to them. The goblin-lady ignores me, but shiny head reflection man nods his head in greeting. They allow me to pass without incident, and I step past the threshhold. As soon as I am inside, I feel a cold, clammy oppressive feeling, like I am being stalked by a ghost. Of course, I ignore it.

The church hall is huge, row upon row of benches, many murals, a painted ceiling, an impressive pew and in the very center of the church, a huge statue of an arrogant looking guy with long blonde hair. He is holding a trident to the skies pompously, as though he is better than me. How presumptuous. There is only one supreme being on this world, and it is I, the overloli.

There are a few pious looking priestly robe-things shambling about, cleaning and mumbling to themselves. I ignore the ambience generating NPC's and approach the huge statue. Every step I take now, increases the pressure that I feel bearing down on me. Don't underestimate me! Alyce-chan can shoulder anything, even a fat god!

Warning: Titon, God of light, gazes hatefully upon you.

System-chan lets me know that I am being watched by a pervert. B-baka, stalking Alyce-chan and watching me from the heavens, you hentai!

Ahen.

“O great god of light!” I call out as I approach the statue. “Please allow me to express my love for you with this greeting.” I say, my voice reverberating throughout the huge church hall.

Warning: Titon, God of light has attempted to curse you.

I can't help but giggle. “Oh, would you look at that.” I smirk.

“Anyway, here's my greeting, o great Titon!” I shout at the top of my lungs.

I point my fist at the statue.Then I slowly raise my middle finger and grin, staring up at the statue as I wave my middle-finger back and forth in the air.

Lost in my middle-finger worship, I fail to notice exactly when I am approached, but suddenly, there is a priest in front of me with a puzzled expression on his face. “My lady, may I ask what you are doing?”

“Ah, good day mister priest. I am just showing my favor to the great Titon by way of a traditional greeting. He likes it a lot. Why don't you also try?” I say. For a moment, the priest furrows his brow, but after a few seconds, he turns to the statue and imitates me, giving the statue of Titon the middle-finger. Fufufu, excellently goodly fine!

I join in the worship, vigorously fingering the statue.

Ahen.

Let's not finger too much, otherwise Tie'sha will get jealous.

Anyway, I have accomplished my mission. Now it is time to evacuate. Even as I am leaving the hall, I see the priest that approached me going around to the other white-robed people and teaching them the middle-finger salute. ww.

When I step outside, I feel a burden off my chest. Stupid fat god, don't press me down! I am short enough as is so stop trying to compress my spine like that!

Although I'm a perfect size for a loli, okay? Goddamn it!

I look back one last time and see a group of 5 priests all gathered around the Titon statue deep in worship. They are worshipping very hard with their middle fingers, waving them at the statue enthusiastically, a zealous shine in their eyes.

Good good. My work here is done.

Now, where is my candy!?