A buck-toothed brigand was carrying a medium-sized adorned chest in his hands and was heading towards the hideout with a grin on his face.

"This has been a good day! Quite a good haul for such a small caravan. Nobody has died either, which is quite surprising!" The thief thought to himself.

He had picked a chest full of perfumes and scented soaps, because he knew from experience that them noble-types paid a lot of coin for these sorts of fancy-shmancy wares. The gang's fence would most certainly give him quite a nice sum for these products. Plus, the brigand also liked to chew on the pink soap bars, because it made his mouth and farts smell like roses afterwards.

"Hey, Chen, what did you pick for your own loot?" The brigand asked while turning around to look for the companion that was supposed to be following right behind him.

"Chen? Where are you? I swear on the Gods, if this is another one of your bad jokes…"

*Niii-haaaaa* a braying caravan donkey ran right past the brigand while carrying a lot of chests on its back.

"Chen? Come out you bastard! I am not in the mood for this!"

"Where the hell is Chen? He was right behind me the second ago!" The thief began to panic.

"Did he have to go and take a piss again? Or is this something else and we are under attack? Should I yell and tell the others to be wary? What if it's just a false alarm? I don’t want the Boss to smack me again! Maybe I should return and…"

*Thonk* The brigand did not even get to finish his line of thoughts before getting knocked out-cold by some really heavy blunt instrument to the back of his head.

━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

"Why is it taking so long for Chen and Hong to come back? Everybody else has already come back." The Bandit Leader thought to himself.

"Did they get drunk on the stuff they looted again and knocked themselves out? It wouldn't be the first time…"

"Hey, guys! Some of you come over here and give me a hand with this chest! It has suddenly become extremely heavy, so I suspect that there is some sort of Magic involved with it! The chest must definitely contain some sort of a hidden treasure, if we can manage to open it!" The garbled voice of Hong suddenly resounded from the forest side.

"I will go check out what that problem is all about." The Bandit Leader's right-hand man volunteered.

"Right! Just make sure that the idiots do not destroy the item first. Magically-warded chests are seldom as simple as they seem." Warned the Bandit Leader.

"Will do, Boss!" The brigand Lieutenant acknowledged, then rushed into the forest with a few more people.

After waiting for another five more minutes without any sort of reply from the forest-side, the Boss had decided that something was really wrong and had drawn out his weapon while ordering the remaining goons to assume a battle formation, because all of his internal instincts had begun to scream at him that he was in dire danger somehow.

After only a simple donkey carrying a heavy load from the caravan had run past all of the thieves in a panic, the group began to move towards the forest at a slow pace. The trail showed obvious signs of some sort of a struggle and of bodies being carried away, but nobody had been able to find any of the missing persons yet. An eerie silence permeated the air, as not even the birds and the insects could be heard anymore, like they had been frightened away by something terrible.

"B...Boss...something’s wrong’ere! I dun like it one bit! It’s too quiet!"

"Shuddup, you cowards! I’m here, ain’t I? Ya think anyone can simply mess with a Foundation Establishment stage 4 Cultivator like me? I’ll shred’em to pieces, just ya watch!" The Boss yelled while trying to reinforce the morale of his minions and his own state of mind. In truth, he was also pissing his pants in fear, because if any sort of bigshot Hero-wannabe showed up with some REAL Skills, not garbage and fake like his own flashy moves, they would all get screwed bigtime!

"Guang, Tao, guard our backs. Feng and Zi can defend right, Fu and Yao beware on the left side, and I’ll take the vanguard. "

"B...Boss...Guang ain’t here!"

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"What? Guang? Where the hell did you go, you bastard! Tao, what happened?"

"I dunno boss, he was here a second ago!"

"DAMMIT! We’re being hunted one by one! Be prepared to shoot anything that moves!"

*Bush Rustle*

"THERE! KILL IT!!!"

*THUNK! THUNK! THUD!*

*SQUACK*

"WE GOT IT!" Two of the thieves immediately rushed towards the bushes.

...

"UGH...What the hell is this thing?"

"A...black chicken? What the hell is a rooster doing here? Did it escape one of the caravan carriages? I did not see any animal cages in any of them!"

*PADAAAAAWK Ḟ̴͔̮̘̜͕͌̑̊̊̔͋̕ͅĘ̴̘̙̮̹͔̘̱̥̃̑̐̔̆ͅË̴̥̳͉̯̬̟́͐͛́D̴̮̈́̔̿̍͗̅̈́̚͝ ̶͚̥͔̗̩͑̎̕M̴̧̘̪̼̳̻̥̳̘̓Ë̷̥͖́̉ ̶̡͔̲͍̱̥͒̕͜ͅY̷̧̳͔͇̓Ǫ̸̭̙̦̤͒͆U̴̜̥͈̳̳̥͈̥͌R̶̢͙̭̤͓̻̎͒ ̴̞̬͚̥͓̗͈͖̎̃͌̃̈̄̉͛̀̕͜Ş̶́͗̌̓̈́́̊͗́̌O̵̱̦͇̞̤̼̰͇̒̉U̵̠͇̪̒̾̓͊́̔Ļ̷̨̢͚̗̞̬̼̼͗̋͜Š̵͔̖̟̲̠̗̩̻̜͋͒̄͗́͜!̸͖͉̲̙̾͜*

The dead rooster suddenly sprang back to life and began pecking away at the brigands with all three arrows still stuck inside of it, causing all of the thieves to backpedal in fear and stumble onto their asses.

"GODS DAMN IT! KILL IT! KILL IT! AAARGH! IT HURTS! IT HURTS! THOSE ARE SOME SHARP TALONS! I’M BLEEDING! IT EVEN HAS TEETH! *Snap* EEEK! IT ATE MY BOW STRING!"

*SHWING* *SWORDCUT* The Boss immediately decapitated the bird, causing its body to crumble to the ground while twitching.

"YOU FUCKING INCOMPETENT BUFOONS! AFRAID OF A MEAGER CHICKEN? YOU BRING SHAME TO THE BLACK-SNAKES GANG NAME!"

"BUT BOSS! THAT REALLY HURT! LOOK...IT EVEN GAVE ME A REALLY NASTY GASH!" Complained the thief with the ruined bow.

*PADAAAAAWK CLUCK CLUCK T̶̙̠̪̅̄H̵̩̝̪̯̞̤̣̚͝͝Ȩ̸͎͚͋̌̍̃̏R̶̖̠̼̳̝͙͎̘̊́̂̓̀͘͜͠E̴͚͉̽̈́̐͊̌́̊͆̾ ̸̡̛̟̺͖̱̰̤̫͙̲̈̔̎̌͒̅C̸͓̦̃A̶͚͇͉̿̓͗̈͊̓̚N̴̡̧̜̙̊̌̑͋̿̒͝ ̷̧̝͙͙̆͋͆̆̎̽̚B̶̧̡̨̡͓̘̯̌̇̚͠E̸͕̰͈̠̾̑̂͋̓̽̎͋͝ ̵̨̳̿̈́̎͛́̾̌̓̓͠O̴̡̠̺̰͇̘̪͓͆͑̿̈́̋͝ͅŅ̵̨̼̖͎̞̺̮̓̈̈̂̆̈́̋ͅĻ̵̨͓̳̟̩̘̜̦̃̐̇͝ͅŶ̷̡̞̝̙̖̞̙̳̫ ̷̬̠͑̉̒̇͛̌͊͋͜Ȏ̷̫͋̽̕Ņ̷͈͍̺̝͇̫̯͓̳͑̉̽̑̀͒E̴̡̫̲̱̰̻̾͋̓̽͒̽͌̀̉̄!̵̨̤̝̤͓̣̝͍̈́*

"AAAACK! IT’S AFTER ME AGAIN!"

"WHAT THE F...ANOTHER ONE?"

*SHWING* *SWORDCUT* *THUD*

"How many of these things are out there?"

"Isn’t that the same one?"

"It can’t be! I just cut its head off!"

*PADAAAAAWK I̶̡̫̪̲͉͙̩̟̤̓̑́́ ̸̳̫̙̠̍͑̓͋̑̌̚͝͠͝Ẅ̵͇̘̠̳̙͈̳̤̯́͗̊I̷̧͈̝̖̯̒͆̅Ḻ̷̨͓̣̰̯͈̪̦̺̔͂L̸̛̫̜̽͋͊͐̽́̚ ̸̦̖̇̒͊̀̇F̴̧̱̱͖̺̩̙͒̑̓̊̒̀͆̀͝E̷̺̅Ą̴̢̹̙̳͈̯͎̌̃̑͒͑̌͘Ŝ̶͙͉̥͎̠̫̯͉̃̏͒͜ͅŢ̵̹̤̤͇̦͕͐͆͒̾́ ̷̡͕͍̑͆͂̆̈́̈́͊́͝ͅO̷͙̹̼̰̬̠̥͕̓̂N̵̰̟̣͚̍͋̂̿ ̸͚̜̰̼͓̀̈́͛̂̑̌̇̚̚͝Y̵͓̪̖̲̻͚͖͍̋͊̈́͠O̴̡̢̧̥͍̱̠̺͋͛̀̈́͊͛̈͑U̴̱̥̝͎͈͔͝R̶̢̗̻̘͙̘̪͎̈́͆͊̍̑̈́ ̵̧̧̟̻͖̰̏͆̆̐͑̓͋B̵̧͎̙͇͍͉̩̣̈͑̀̀̐̍̍̐̈́L̴͕͈͈̥̲͇̜̓̇̄͘Ơ̵̡̢̼͙͈͈̫̻̳͌̍́́Ǫ̸̛̠̠̥̟̰̥̳͛̎̈́̔͑̓̌̚͝D̷̯̅͛̎͐̓̀͝͠!̷̛̟̼͓͙̭̜̀̏̐̇̒̃͜͝͠*

"AUAUAUAUAU! GET IT OFF ME! IT’S CHEWING MY EAR OFF!"

*SHWING*SWORDCUT*SWORDCUT*SWORDCUT*STAB*STAB*SWORDCUT*STAB*

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU! DIE ALREADY!"

"UGH...BOSS...WHERE IS EVERYBODY ELSE?"

"WHAT DO YOU M...HIIIC!"

Sure enough, immediately as soon as the Boss turned around, he noticed that everybody else from his group had vanished into thin air.

*GULP*

*PADAAAAAWK W̶̥̯̬̠̻̓́̓̓̃̏̿͆ͅḦ̸̱́̐͛̒͆͂͋̈́͝Ė̴̜̰͓͕͖̫͔̞̀R̴̘̝͇̰͕̀̿̅͜͜É̴̙̤͖͍̦͍͎̈́̋͜ ̷̨̱͔̯͈̆͂̑̍̔̆ͅÌ̵̦͗̈́̄̽̿̈̄͆̃S̴̨͉̳̫̤̮̺̈́̿ ̷̛̝̲̖̺̊͊͆̓Ṁ̶̝͖͚̜Y̴͇̪̞̻̅ ̶̙̙͒͊̽̅͒́ͅF̴̪͙͎͎͓̒̌̋̊̿͂̑͝͝U̵̢̫̘̲̫͙̹̼̥̎́́̉͌͋̃̎C̷̢̘͕̳̹̲̘̤̜̆̀͜͝K̷̢̝͈̘̉Į̷̨̪̟̼̪͎̭̈́͂͗̎͗̿̎̚͘N̵̢̗̣͕̜̩̣̮̱̖͆̃̓́̃G̷͉͈̘̹̞̽͆̅̄̈́̌͐͗ ̸̢̨̭̤͖̾̀͘Ț̴̨͕̐̓̓̈́E̵̱͋͑Ą̶̙͎͖͎͕͍͉͇̇,̴̢̲̥̬̟̄͌͒ ̷̢̿̋̓̀̽̒̌͊͂͝B̶͍̺͎̖͙̐͌͛̋̋̈́̂̀Ĭ̵̖͐̇̍̕T̵̨͚͈̗̞̭͉͍͈̂̂͑͊̀̋͜C̷̩̞̎̊̿́͂͌̍Ḩ̴̡̧̛͕̖̦̮͚̰͙!̶̖̠̯̆͒̓͑̓̀̋̕*

"MOTHERF!"

*SHWING*SWORDCUT*SWORDCUT*SWORDCUT*STAB*STAB* *SWORDCUT*STAB*STAB*STAB*SWORDCUT*STAB*

"WHAT THE HELL, FENG! WHY CAN’T YOU KEEP YOUR EYES ON EVEN A SINGLE DEAD CHICKEN!!? FENG? WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GO! FENG!...OH SHIT...!"

*DOUBLE GULP*

The boss suddenly found himself all alone in the clearing together with the still-twitching corpses of many mad chickens.

"I KNO’ YOU’RE OUT THERE SOMEWHERE, YA FOCKEN CNTS! SHOW YERSELVES AND FACE MY WRATH!" Yelled the Boss.

*BOING* *BOING* *BOING*

"AHA! GOTCHA!" The Boss yelled while taking a series of precise swings and cutting down all of the incoming projectiles with his blade in two pieces.

Unfortunately, that did not seem to have the desired effect, as the pill capsules simply burst open from the slashes, releasing all of their irritating content right into the face of the Bandit Leader.

"ARGH! MY EYES!" *COUGH*COUGH*COUGH* HRRRGHHH!* "IT HURTS!" *COUGH*COUGH*COUGH* The Bandit Leader began to tear up and cough his lungs out while taking random wild swings all around himself.

"NIII-HAAAA!" *Hoof to the head* A donkey-scream could suddenly be heard from behind the thief, accompanied by a large bone-cracking noise resounding from the skull of the Bandit Leader.

*THUD* The brigand instantly bit the dirt and then stopped moving.

*PLOP* The donkey then pridefully placed his whole behind on top of the unconscious Bandit Leader, as if it was Teabagging its most recent frag.

*UNCLOAKING SOUND*

"Well then, that’s over and done with...now to pacify the caravan...GAH! I hate public speeches!" Yi Gore thought to himself as he rushed back to meet the rest of the panicked folk from the traveling group.