We eat.
We mate.
We steal.
We kill.
Today is the day we will take over something called a......villeg? (AN:....if you can't instantly figure that out........It's village...)
So we move with our powerful weapons. (AN: rocks. clubs. more rocks. pointy rocks.....you get the point)
-----5 hours of walking to the village later-----
We have found the villeg.
We are going to attack the village with all of us. (AN: 2000 goblins. VS like....20 guards and 80 villagers with....pitchforks.)
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''CHARGE!!!'' (Chief)
Our chief yells and we attack the villeg.
I see a hooman in shiny clothes with a big shiny and pointy rock. (AN: Guy in armour with a sword)
I throw my pointy rocks at the hooman. (AN: like mother fucking shuriken)
''AAAAAAARGH!!!'' (Hooman)
He screams when two pointy rocks get into his eyes. (AN: that's gonna leave a....well not a mark....a lot of blood loss and possible death is more likely)
Then my fellow goblin runs and hits the hooman with his club multiple times.
After I finish my fight I turn to see all of the hooman in shiny clothes dead. (AN: *sarcastic* yaaaay)
''ATTACK THE VILLEG AND TAKE THE WOMEN!!!'' (Chief)
When the chief says that we attack and take all of the women while killing all of the men and I go into a small hut just to see a man with a big rock on a stick attack me. (AN: Sledgehammer)
''YOU WON'T DESTROY MY VILLAGE!!!'' (Man).
When he says that he attacks me with his weapon.
I dodged the attack and threw my pointy rocks at him.
''...ow'' (Man)
It only scratches him. (AN: oh shit.)
''HA HA HA!!! AND I THOUGHT THAT YOU WERE STRONG!!!!!'' (Man)
When he says that he crushes my head in with the big rock.
I see nothing but darkness. (AN: we all know where this is going.)
Then I see a man wearing black armour with a mithril greatsword. (AN: here it comes.)
And he says. (AN: wait for it)
''I have no interest in you....go to Goltur.'' (Lakurn)
Then I fall into a trapdoor.
....What just happened?
I see darkness.
Then I see a man in nothing but a skirt made of leaves and grass wielding a spear made of just a long stick and a pointy rock.
Then he says.
''Will you join me to defeat the overlord Lakurn??'' (Goltur)
I feel very comftorable here and I see a man wearing bright green armour and a large snake near the man.
I say.
''Yes, my lord.'' (Goblin)
-------------
THE END