Maze World

"Greg, have you been rearranging the Maze?" Beth asked, raising an eyebrow at him as she held up her phone, showing a picture her dad had sent of a recently remapped section of the Maze which just happened to spell out the words 'Maze Wor-' and then cut off.

"Maybe." Greg smirked.

"Maze War?" Victoria commented, giving him a weird look. "Greg, people die in there."

"It isn't 'Maze War' it's Maze and then the first half of World… I got bored, so I never finished." Greg shrugged.

"That's- better?" Victoria cocked her head. "But still a weird thing to write."

"Well, I was going to write 'Maze World sucks ass' but it just turned into too much effort for something no one would ever see." Greg sighed, before pausing. "Of course, now that I see they remap the thing, I may have to go finish it. Though I'll need to change Maze World to something else… Azza maybe? Or just the Maze…"

"Or you could not insult our freaking reality." Beth grumbled.

"Well I'm sorry, but your reality is boring." Greg retorted. "Bee, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh-"

"We get it." Andrew rolled his eyes. "It isn't like your World is any better, you know. All we've been doing there is hunting."

"We haven't been doing much anywhere, really… except System World, I suppose." Chris commented. "Though even then we were mostly just fucking around until we talked to the Emperor."

"I think we did quite a bit. It just became somewhat pointless after we figured out there were no Immortals to worry about." Victoria shrugged.

"Damn it, aren't Worlds supposed to keep things exciting?!?" Greg complained. "I mean, the only thing that happened here is fighting that stupid Elf squad, which I fucking missed, and then nothing! We've just been sitting around doing nothing!"

"You've been doing nothing." Beth retorted. "Some of us have been quite busy."

"How is training going?" Chris asked.

"It's great!" Beth beamed. "I'm learning so much! If I knew all this back during the practical exercises, we would have crushed the kobolds."

Chris paused. "That- isn't saying much… you could have crushed them just by keeping things simple and not wasting a bunch of time and effort digging a tunnel."

Beth glared at him. "Chris, what have I said about pointing out my mistakes?"

Chris cocked his head. "Once is constructive, twice is reinforcement, and any more than that is courting violent retribution."

"And how many times have you commented on the kobold raid?" Beth growled.

Chris paused, counting in his head. "This would be the fourth time."

"Right, so shut it." Beth grumbled.

"Okay, but-" Chris began.

"Dude, whatever you're about to say, just stop." Victoria quickly interjected. "It will only get you in trouble, and is the point you're trying to make really worth that?"

Chris blinked. "I suppose not."

Beth smiled at Victoria. "Thank you."

"Can we get back to us now?" Greg asked. "You know, the important people?"

"Greg, don't be a dick." Andrew sighed.

"I'm not! It's just a literal fact that as far as the World is concerned, we are the special ones, and she's just along for the ride! I'm not saying it's right, it's just the way it is!" Greg protested.

"So? What's your point?" Victoria rolled her eyes.

"Why isn't the World doing anything?!?" Greg threw up his hands in frustration. "All we've been doing is sitting here! It's boring, and the exact opposite of what the World is supposed to do! Where's the excitement? The adventure? Aren't things supposed to be happening pretty much constantly? Just one thing after another, boom, boom, boom! That's how stories work!"

"Unless you're in a time skip." Chris shrugged. "Time skips are usually just pure progress with little to nothing actually happening. At least, nothing that would actually have an impact on the plot."

Greg froze. "Mother. Fucker. Are you telling me we have to actually live through the boring parts even the authors skip?!?"

"Greg, Worlds are based on stories, they aren't actually stories." Victoria rolled her eyes. "This isn't the boring part, this is the period where we actually get to live our lives without the World trying to screw us over."

"Plus it gives us time to grow." Andrew added. "It's hard to focus on training when a new problem is popping up every five seconds."

"Really? I haven't noticed." Chris commented.

Andrew narrowed his eyes at him. "I can't tell if that's sarcasm, or you just being you."

"Eh? Your pick." Chris shrugged. "You're right, but also we have multiple selves, so it isn't actually an issue for us."

"It isn't an issue for you maybe." Victoria grumbled. "Even with multiple forms, I have a hard time concentrating when something big is going on."

"Me too." Andrew agreed. "I can't just disconnect myself from everything else going on."

"I just have a hard time concentrating." Greg chuckled.

"Huh… weird." Chris muttered. "But anyway, it isn't like nothing has been happening. We now have four cultivators, Andrew and I have both been growing due to our different abilities, and my subordinates have made it to the tenth level of the Maze."

"I think I reached superior tier." Andrew agreed. "Which is pretty good for just spending some time walking around the Maze and letting the World work."

"Have I mentioned how bullshit that is?" Greg grumbled. "Also the fact that you can't give us cores from other Worlds."

"I told you, the auras aren't compatible." Andrew shrugged. "There's nothing I can do about it."

"Feh!" Greg waved dismissively.

"Haven't you figured something out from watching the Doppelgangers mutate?" Victoria asked.

Greg shook his head. "No. I mean, I can make myself a high-tier body, no problem, but the actual process of mutation is beyond me. I think it requires some sort of interaction with the World, and I don't have that. Not even when I turn into a slime… I don't think it's genetic, I think it's something they pass down when they split. It may be something you can figure out through the system."

Victoria grimaced. "I'm trying, but it isn't as easy to piece things together without another system to parse things out for me. It doesn't help that I can't actually interact with the core either. Maybe if someone would get a better handle on their ability…"

The author's narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

"I'm working on it!" Andrew exclaimed. "Cores are confusing! I mean, I can handle it as a whole, but piecing apart the individual aspects is a bitch and a half. It's less code and more intent packaged concepts which all blend together, because legs, toes, feet, and your freaking inner ear all deal with mobility, and how do you isolate any one part of it when all you see is 'this is how this creature moves'!"

"Yeah, see, all I'm hearing are excuses." Victoria smirked.

"Yeah, well, have you figured out the red lightning yet?" Andrew shot back.

Victoria flushed. "It's- something to do with thoughts…"

"Uh-huh. Didn't think so." Andrew stuck his tongue out at her.

Beth sighed. "You guys need to get out more. I have the weekend off, how about we go do something?"

"I'm always up to do something." Greg immediately agreed. "As long as it isn't boring. Like a concert. Or shopping. Or hiking. Or pretty much anything that requires me to just be there and pay attention."

Beth blinked. "We… Could go to the amusement park?"

Greg paused for a moment, before nodding. "This is acceptable."

"I'm down." Andrew agreed. "I've never actually been to one before… pretty sure I would have just ended up breaking something."

Beth frowned. "Weren't you super strong? How- oh… never mind." She flushed as she realized he meant he'd break the rides.

"I guess I could go to an amusement park…" Victoria muttered. She honestly didn't have anything against it, it just wasn't anything she'd get excited about.

"Sure." Chris shrugged. "Should we invite Derek, Penny, and Thad?"

Beth nodded. "Also, Ka'lypso and Jello. I'm sure they'd love to go, and their forms are close enough to human that no one will say anything."

Chris frowned. "If we bring Ka'lypso, the rest of the kobold women are going to want to come too, if only because I'll be there."

"Or Andrew." Victoria added with a smirk. "I've seen more than a few eyeing him lately."

Andrew flushed. "I wouldn't mind so much if they weren't so persistent about it." He grumbled.

"Is it so bad if they come?" Beth asked, cocking her head. "You can't keep them cooped up in your world forever. A little bit of human interaction would be good for them!"

Chris considered it for a moment. "I suppose… but you could say the same for all my subordinates."

"So why not bring all of them?" Beth retorted. "They can direct their mutations, can't they? Just have them all mutate into human forms and bring them."

Chris paused, his eyebrows rising slightly in appreciation. "I hadn't thought of that… okay, sure, let's do it."

"Guys, hold on, I think we're forgetting something here." Victoria interjected. "Going to an amusement park costs money. You need to pay for the tickets, food, drinks, games, a whole lot of stuff! You'd need-" She trailed off as Chris held out his phone, showing his current account balance. "Okay, no, we're good." She shook her head. She hadn't realized Chris was freaking loaded in this World.

*

Dyrdek picked at his shirt with a grimace. "Chief, why do we have to wear these? They're so restrictive."

"Because humans don't walk around half naked all the time, and you're trying to blend in." Chris replied. "That goes for all of you, particularly the females." He added, giving a few of the goblin women who were awkwardly adjusting their bras a stern look. "You will keep all your clothes on for the entire trip."

"I don't know why you all are having issues. Clothes are fun!" Firbolt commented, doing a twirl to make her dress flair.

"Look at all these pockets!" Girolt agreed, displaying his cargo pants, which he had filled with a suspicious amount of twine. "So much room for supplies!"

Chris narrowed his eyes at him, waving his hand to empty the pockets. "You are not making traps at the amusement park. No one is causing any trouble, period. You are there to enjoy yourselves and adjust to human society."

"But traps are how I enjoy myself!" Girolt complained.

"Don't worry, Chief, I'll keep everyone in line." Dyrdek assured him, pounding his chest.

Ka'lypso snorted. "I will handle everything, Lord. Though I'm sure the little goblin can help." She teased, giving Dyrdek a smirk.

Dyrdek gritted his teeth. "I am more than capable of keeping everyone in line! I am the Chief's oldest subordinate."

"The weakest subordinate, you mean." Ka'lypso sneered.

"Enough." Chris ordered. "You can both keep everyone in line, together. Along with Ka'den and Yirfek." He named off two other subordinates that had been showing some promise leading their squads recently, before focusing on Ka'lypso. "We aren't kobolds, and strength doesn't equal authority." He then turned to Dyrdek. "Neither does seniority. You will all gain authority by being capable. Prove you can handle it or lose it." He gave everyone another look over, before nodding. "Okay, let's go."

*

"I feel like there should be some sort of death march playing." Andrew muttered as they watched Chris's subordinates file out of his world in a disturbingly organized manner, Dyrdek, Ka'lypso, Yirfek, and Ka'den overseeing it all with stern expressions.

"Chris, you know we're attending the amusement park, not invading it, right?" Penny asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Would you rather they swarm out in a chaotic horde?" Chris asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I think there's a middle ground between chaos and rigid discipline." Thad rolled his eyes.

"Not with my subordinates." Chris shook his head. "They don't have any idea what appropriate behavior is, so if you let them act casually, they'll just run amok."

"Can't you just do your mental thing to teach them what appropriate behavior is?" Victoria asked. "Like with the Subbuci."

Chris wiggled his hand. "I can give them the information, but I can't force them to internalize it. It works with the Subbuci because they're blank slates, so any information I give them becomes their default, but when they have a previous understanding of the subject, it takes work to resolve any conflicts."

"Gotcha." Victoria nodded.

"You got all the tickets?" Beth asked.

"Yup, all one hundred and fifty-two." Chris nodded, pulling out a huge stack of tickets.

"Then let's get going!" She clapped excitedly, the entire group making their way towards the gate of the amusement park, bystanders shooting them weird looks as they traveled in a well organized throng.

As they approached the gate, a man stepped in front of them. "Excuse me, would one of you be Major Vincent?"

Chris paused, turning to Beth. "Am I a Major now?"

Beth frowned at him. "How should I know? You should have gotten something in the mail."

Chris blinked. "What mail?"

Beth just stared at him for a moment, before pinching the bridge of her nose. "Chris, please tell me you have a mailing address."

"Where? The orphanage I don't live at anymore? The house in a different dimension?" Chris retorted.

"You can get a P.O. Box!" Beth exclaimed. "You can get one on base, even!"

"I guess, but why? I don't get mail." Chris shrugged.

"How would you know!?! You don't have a mailing address!" Beth snapped.

The man who'd stopped them coughed. "Officially he has a P.O. Box at the Scout base post office, but this does explain why he hasn't replied to any of our letters."

Beth glared at Chris who shrugged. "No one told me." He turned back to the man. "So, what do you want?"

The man bowed. "I am a representative of the Montero Family. I apologize for interrupting your day, but as previously mentioned, you have been a difficult man to get in contact with. Your personal contact information has been regrettably concealed, and your mailing address has proved… unresponsive. We were forced to use… alternative means to get in contact with you."

"They tracked your spending." Victoria frowned, having sent some points into the man the moment he'd approached. She wasn't trusting random men walking up to them out of nowhere. Not with their luck. "How did you manage that, but you couldn't find his phone number?"

The man's mouth worked wordlessly for a moment. "You- have a telepath?" He glanced at Chris nervously.

"Huh… apparently I'm illegal." Victoria smirked.

"Does this have anything to do with why we're not currently enjoying our time at the amusement park?" Greg asked.

"Uh, my apologies." The man coughed awkwardly, shooting nervous glances at Victoria. "I believe if Major Vincent ever used his phone, we would have found it, but since he seems to find such things beneath him, we had to resort to different methods."

"Dude, we don't care! Just get on with it!" Greg insisted.

"I- I'm here to invite you to the Montero Manor at your earliest convenience!" The man finally spat out.

"Fine. You invited me. We done here?" Chris asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

The man grimaced. "May I ask when you would be able to attend?"

Chris sighed. "How about tomorrow?" He wasn't all that excited about dealing with the Monteros, so he'd rather just get it over with.

"That would be acceptable. Shall we say four in the afternoon?" The man offered.

"Whatever." Chris waved dismissively.

The man's expression twisted. "I shall inform the Patriarch of your acceptance." He replied, before walking off.

"So… that was weird, huh?" Andrew commented.

"Nah, they're probably just trying to rope me back into the Family." Chris shrugged. "Technically my mom was a Montero. Genetically, at least."

"Chris, has anyone ever told you that your genealogy is more twisted than a pretzel?" Derek commented, rolling his eyes.

Chris frowned. "It isn't that complicated."

"You're related to what essentially amounts to the royalty of three different races." Derek retorted.

"Hey, Dichonius is just an administrator, not a ruler." Chris retorted. "I don't think the Doppelgangers even have royalty…"

"So their royalty are their administrators, hence, fuck you, I'm right." Derek smirked.

Chris paused. "Fine, my genealogy is a mess." He admitted with a sigh.

"Damn straight." Derek nodded.

"So, can we get to the amusement park now?" Greg asked.

"Yeah, let's do it." Chris agreed. "The Monteros aren't worth ruining a good day over."