What?

Do you expect me to tell ya how the fight between those 3 idiots? Oh, of course, I will, but let's take a break and see how the trio met. I just don't want the comedy element on this story to disappear, though I always put absurd twists on every chapter I write. Well, I will tell you how Alfi, Koji, and Rian met and how they became good friends in this chapter.

It started with the time when Alfi was a student of Muda-muda University. Why Muda-muda? It's because Ora-ora University is on Central Java (Ora: no(Javanese)). And why didn't I pun it into "Guda-guda"? It's because the story isn't sponsored by Type Moon. It was when Alfi was a 3rd-year-student. He was a member of SEES (Specialized English Extra Sect) organization and it was on the orientation day.

Alfi was sitting on the corner listening to the leader's speech for the new members. Alfi didn't need to say a thing as he was just a mentor because he was the smartest member in SEES, but because of his criminal face, he lost in the leader election. Alfi didn't give a shit about that, he just joined so he could take a nap when he didn't have any class.

Suddenly a short hair guy with glasses who sat beside him talked to him for ice breaking.

'Kak Alfi.'

'Just call me Alfi.'

'Oh, well, name's Koji.'

They both shook their hands.

'You come from Bandung?' Alfi asked.

'Nope, I come from Purwakarta. How about you? You must not come from here, right?' Koji asked.

'I do.' Alfi replied.

'Oh, sorry.' Koji felt awkward.

Alfi giggled and said, 'It's cool, some do say that I'm not from Bandung. Some say I come from the East, Middle East, and even Dajjal rep.'

'What a dick.' Koji laughed at Alfi.

'You are quite lively, eh?' A pale-faced guy beside Koji joined their chat.

'Oh, your friend?' Alfi asked.

'Yes, kang (An acronym of "akang" in Sundanese which means "big bro"), name's Rian.' He introduced himself.

'You know what? There will be NekoPoi meet up by next week! (NSFW site.)' Koji said.

'Oh?! For real?!' Alfi seemed excited.

'Yeah. And there will be free Nekopara Jacket for one lucky guest!' Koji exclaimed.

'Aww, why not custom shirt instead?' Alfi looked disappointed.

'What shirt do you want anyway?' Koji asked.

'Hokari Kanae, Euphoria.' Alfi replied.

'Really? She's a bitch, you know?' Rian said.

'Bitch? What do you mean?' Alfi looked curious.

'Huh? You don't play the VN(Visual Novel)?'

'Nah. I just watch the anime series.'

'Then you just don't have any idea about it. The series doesn't tell the true story actually. Maybe you feel sick every time you watch episode 2 or 4, yet believe me, the VN is just disgusting.'

'Tell me.'

Rian then whispered him the whole plot of Euphoria along with the H scene. Why don't I make the dialogue about it? I just want you to suffer when you somehow try to find out how the story goes by playing the VN.

'Ok. I hate Kanae. She deserves to be raped until the last of her breath.' Alfi looked disappointed.

'Such a character is a must to put on any kind of story, and Euphoria isn't an exception. In fact, I have some VNs which are worse than Euphoria.' Rian said.

'Really?!'

'A scene like ******, *******, *******, ******, even *******, *****, *******.'

Koji just enjoyed their chit-chat and Alfi looked kinda disgusted. All members looked at those three who had fun talking about something unnecessary all of sudden.

'Alfi, get out!' The SEES leader exclaimed. I don't want to name him as his role isn't important at all.

'Why?! We just talk something fishy not doing something fishy!' Alfi exclaimed.

'You did, but sooner or later you'll do something disgracing which defiles our sacred sect. On behalf of His Excellency Chomsky, I evict three of thee! Now, give me back your evokers!'

'Hey! It's SEES of the English club, not SEES on Persona 3!' Alfi exclaimed upset.

'Cut the crap! Get outta here!'

Alfi, Koji, and Rian were kicked out from SEES.

'Ah crap, I have to join another club.' Koji sighed.

'Not to mention that the clubs here are boring. If only they have a literature club here.' Rian added.

'Huh? Did you say "literature"? You like writing?' Alfi asked.

'Yup. I am writing 3 novels on my personal blog.' Rian replied.

'What if we make a literature club!' Alfi asked.

'Is it possible?' Koji asked.

'We just need 3 members alongside with the vision and mission!' Alfi said excitedly.

'Isn't it 9?' Koji asked.

'It's literature club, not School Idol.' Alfi said.

'Then, can you make the vision and mission?' Rian asked.

'Sure, it's easy. Considering that one of the conditions of graduation is we have to be a member of the school club while there's no club we like to join, then why don't we make one? Literature is just the mask, we just need to make a fake report saying our routine activity which actually we just slacking off in the club room. Not to mention that there are many empty rooms in the club hall.' Alfi exclaimed.

'Then I'm in.' Rian said.

'Me too!' Koji exclaimed.

'Well, I-'

'Alfi!!!!' A long-haired girl came to Alfi cheerfully.

'Bunga!' Alfi exclaimed excitedly.

Bunga hugged him tightly. Koji and Rian became awkward by seeing it.

Bunga then let him go.

'You have done already? That's fast considering that SEES activity ends at 1 A.M.' Bunga asked.

'I'll explain later. How about you? No rehearsal today?' Alfi asked.

'Well... Actually, I am just kicked out from the choir because I was talking about something disgraceful with these 2.' She was blushing.

2 girls were standing behind her with their clueless faces.

'Me too.' Alfi was blushing too.

"What a lovey-dovey." They four said in their minds.

'Listen, as we have been kicked from a number of clubs all this time, why don't we make our own club?' Alfi asked.

'Well, I don't mind as we need to join a club so we can graduate. What about you two?' Bunga asked those two.

They just nodded.

'Then the member problem is cleared already, eh? I'm gonna propose this club to the faculty staff.' Alfi said. 'Oh yeah, It's Bunga, my girlfriend.' He added embracing her.

'And this is Alfi, my boyfriend.' Bunga embraced him.

"Asshole." They were irritated.

'So you were kicked outed again, Alfi.' A guy with a cynical look and spiky hair appeared.

He came closer to Alfi giving him an intimidating gaze. Bunga looked upset and anxious. Alfi just remained silent ignoring that intimidating gaze. Koji, Rian, and those girls looked clueless to what was happening here.

'What do you want, Andos?' Alfi asked casually.

'How dare you being so casual to me?' Andos replied with his Batakese dialect. (Batak is one of the tribes in Indonesia.)

'I don't want to pick a fight. If you need money, just say it. I'll give you as much as you want as long as you promise us not to disturb us. Don't freak them out please.' Alfi said firmly.

Andos all of sudden strangled Alfi and slammed him to the floor powerfully. The other were shocked by what they had seen. Bunga immediately came to Alfi to help him get up. Those girls then ran away as they were freaking out (They are just useless. ) Koji and Rian were still there.

'Don't get too cocky that you think I bully you just for your money! I don't need your money!' Andos exclaimed.

'*Cough* Then, what do you want?' Alfi asked.

'I want you to just die!' Andos raised his arm.

Suddenly Koji grabbed Andos's arm tightly.

'Don't you dare!' He said firmly.

'If you can bully anyone as you want, then I can interfere as I want.' Koji said firmly. 'I hate a dirtbag like you.' He added.

Andos got triggered by Koji's statement. He swung his arm to let his arm go from Koji's grip, and he launched his fist to Koji, but suddenly Alfi appeared kicking Ando's body that Andos fell to the floor.

If you come across this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

'Alfi?!' Koji was shocked seeing that enraged Alfi.

'You just want me to die, right? Just kill me as you please but I'll kill you if you dare to lay your dirty finger to my friends!' Alfi exclaimed.

'Just you wait, Alfi! You are gonna die!' Andos exclaimed fleeing.

'I'm tired of such a threat!' Alfi exclaimed.

'Are you alright, hun?' Bunga asked worryingly.

'Yes, hun. Don't worry.' Alfi replied.

'What's his problem anyway?' Koji looked uneasy.

'Don't mind. I always encounter such a dirtbag.' Alfi said.

'So, you are always bullied?' Rian asked.

'Yes, I am.' Alfi said.

'Why don't you try to fight or just simply report them to the police?' Koji asked.

'They are not pedophiles. Why should I?' Alfi said casually.

Koji and Rian suddenly kicked Alfi as they were so upset.

'Pedophile isn't the only one you can report to, you stupid weeb!' Koji exclaimed

'You stupid weeb!!' Rian added.

'Why the hell are you bullying Alfi now?!' Bunga yelled at them.

They both then stopped kicking his but and apologized to him.

'Ahahaha. I just don't care about what they want to do to me as long as they stay away from my friends.' Alfi said.

'But, why?' Koji asked.

Alfi got bashful to tell them the cause why he was always bullied. Well, I am sorry that I can't tell why here. If I do, I'll be out of idea for the further chapter, don't you think?

'I see. It must be tough for ya.' Koji said.

'It is.' Alfi said.

'But, it's your fortune, right?' Rian said.

'Can such a blasphemous thing be considered a fortune? No wonder so many people hate me for this kind of level as they think it's unjust while they do know that there's no what they call "justice" in this world.' Alfi explained.

'Well... But...'

'Well, at least we are okay.' Alfi took Bunga's hand. 'We are going.' Alfi and Bunga left both of them.

'Some guy.' Koji said.

'The world is full of people with unique backgrounds.' Rian said.

On the next day, Koji invited Rian, Alfi, and Bunga to his dormitory. His dormitory was located on a tiny alley next to M.U (Muda-muda University.) That tiny alley was narrow and steep that probably they could get to his dormitory by just rolling over. They then took a little step cautiously as the road was kinda slippery that they could get tripped over. They then saw a simple house with a wooden door next to a big window. There was a notice saying "This house is equipped with surveillance cameras."

'Oh, they got CCTV?' Alfi asked.

'Nah, it's just for keeping the burglars away.' Koji said.

'Like the hell, they would take their time to read it.' Alfi said.

Koji opened the door slowly. They saw a small hall before them with doors on every left side and right side. At the end of the hall, there were 2 restrooms in the left and a kitchen in the right. Koji then took a key from his pocket and unlocked the door on his left.

'Come in.' Koji let them in.

They four entered that small room. If you ask me how is it. One phrase: MESSED UP. It's not about gender, it's just normal for those who live in a dormitory.

'Sorry, I had no time to clean it up.' Koji said.

'It's cool. We'll make it mess up even more anyway.' Alfi took out the snacks from the plastic bag he brought.

'So Alfi, do you have any hobby?' Koji asked.

'Hobby?' Alfi asked.

'He doesn't. He just likes locking himself in and keeping me a company.' Bunga added.

'Why so sudden anyway?' Alfi asked.

'Ah, we just want to mingle with you.' Rian said.

'Locking in isn't a good idea. just enjoy your youth while you are still muda!' Koji exclaimed.

'The hell you mean by "muda" here?' Alfi asked irritatedly.

'Hahaha... So you do understand, eh?' Koji and Rian laughed at him.

'What does it mean?' Bunga asked.

'"Muda" in Japanese means "Useless".' Alfi explained. (While in English. Muda means young.)

Bunga held her urge to laugh.

'Well, I just want us to watch a movie here.' Koji said.

'Is it hentai?' Alfi asked excitedly.

'HELL NO!!!' They yelled at him.

'Hahaha... Just kidding.' Alfi chuckled.

They four then watched some anime series together. I won't tell ya what anime they were watching as I don't want to have a business with DMCA anymore. They just watched some normal anime series, not hentai. The heck they did with a girl among them.

'What a wonderful story.' Alfi was impressed.

Well, he just watched porn videos before that no wonder he impressed by just watching the different show. He realized that there were many wonderful stories instead of porn. Moron.

'You have more?' Alfi got curious.

'Sure, want to watch more?' Koji asked.

Alfi took a glance at Bunga. He was afraid of making her uneasy with the atmosphere. Of course, one woman hanging out with 3 men like them. Who wouldn't? Yet she just smiled at him. She knew that he always thought about her, therefore she also had to think about him. She did enjoy it anyway.

They then continued on watching more anime. Alfi seemed to enjoy it with the others.

'Say Koji.' Alfi said.

'What?' Koji asked.

'Why did you invite me to watch out of the blue?' Alfi asked.

'Fi, I need a friend. You must know how hard being a wanderer is, right? I study in the city where I have nobody around. That's why I invited you so we can get along. I hope we can be good friends.' Koji smiled at Alfi.

'I see...' Alfi blushed.

'And afterward, you both are having sex, aren't you?' Rian added.

Bunga went blushed out of the blue.

'Cut the crap already!' Alfi and Koji yelled at him.

'Ho... Honey, I.. I don't mind you having such a fetish. I... I... still love you. It would great to see you...' Bunga was stuttering as she was trying to hold her urge.

'No, honey! It's not like what you are thinking!' Alfi exclaimed panic.

GROWL~

'Sorry, I am kinda hungry.' Koji blushed.

'M... Me too.' Rian said.

Alfi burst out laughing and he took some instant noodles and 2 bottles of 1 liter mineral water from his rucksack.

'Good grief I brought this for emergency light lunch.' Alfi said.

'But, we are out of gas. How are we supposed to cook?' Koji said.

Alfi started thinking. What can he do so they can have lunch? Suddenly he got a wild idea when he saw a magic jar on that small table. No, no, please don't get me wrong. He wouldn't do anything disgraceful even though I wanted to.

'Let's use that.' Alfi said pointing out that magic jar. 'I mean it. We just need to heat some water and boil the noodle in it.' He was trying to convince them who gave him doubtful gazes.

'And how do you take the noodle out of the magic jar? I don't have any spoon nor strainer.' Koji said.

Alfi was thinking again. He was trying to get a way to take the noodle out of the magic jar. There was no way he would use his hand. If he did, he wasn't sure that they three would be okay with the noodle mixed with his dirty hand. He then got an idea when he saw those scattered used mineral water bottles next to him.

'Koji, do you have a pair of scissors?' Alfi asked.

Koji then handed him a pair of small scissors.

'Creation time!' Alfi exclaimed cutting the shoulder and threw out the mouth. 'Let's use this.' he added.

'Well, we are hungry already. So, we'll leave it to ya, chef.' Koji said.

Alfi then put some water to the container and some noodle to it. He set the container into the magic jar and pressed HEAT button. They then had a chitchat while waiting for the noodle to be ready to be served. 5 minutes later, he strained the noodle with the "strainer" he made before. As it was made of plastic, of course it went expanded, but good grief Koji had so many plastic bottles around. A few minutes and plastic bottles later he had used, lunch was ready to be served.

'I didn't expect that your nonsense idea worked out somehow.' Rian said.

'How rude. Alfi is creative.' Bunga said.

'Hey Alfi, can you really eat that much?' Koji asked pointing a lot of noodle on Alfi's plate.

'No worries. I always eat this much.' Alfi chuckled.

'And that's what makes me worry, you know?' Bunga sighed.

'Come on, Bunga, I'm just as great as ever.' Alfi said excitedly.

'But you have to work out with me on Sunday.' Bunga said.

'Sure, hun.' Alfi said.

They then savored their meal. It looked pathetic yet the moment was very priceless. Savoring delicious noodle with your friends is such a priceless moment. Koji, Rian, and Bunga had finished their meal, but Alfi who looked stuffed.

'Uhh~.' Alfi looked pale.

'What? Did you say you would eat it up?' Koji quipped him.

'Shut up.' Alfi said irritated.

The three laughed at him. A few minutes later, Alfi finally somehow managed to eat it up though he had looked like a zombie. What a wazzock.

'Ji, do you have a cup?' Alfi asked.

'What for?' Koji asked.

Alfi drew a string of cheap coffee powder from his rucksack.

'I don't have hot water here.' Koji said.

'Oh, you do.' Alfi said pointing out the magic jar.

'The hell we drink it!' Koji yelled at him.

Alfi took scissors and switched to his creative mode. He cut the half of the cylinder of 4 bottles turning it into 4 plastic cups. He brewed the coffee powder with the water from the magic jar and 4 cups of coffee with noodle pulp were ready to be served.

'I don't want to drink it.' Koji said.

'Me either.' Rian added.

'Come on, it's just a cheap warm coffee with tasty pulp.' Alfi convinced them to drink it. 'You will drink it, won't you?' He asked her.

'Eh? Sure, hun.' She answered doubtfully.

'Ok, here comes nothing.' Koji gave up.

'Very well.' So did Rian.

They then drank that bizarre beverage together. A moment later, Alfi rushed to restroom as he got stomachache. They three laughed at him, but suddenly they got stomachache too. They rushed to the restroom and knocked the door hoping Alfi would let them in, but unfortunately, Alfi had a terrible stomachache. On the day after that, they didn't attend the class because they had a terrible stomachache.

On Sunday, they four had a plan to go to cinema. Koji and Rian had stood near ticket box waiting for Alfi and Bunga. A moment later, they saw Bunga who looked in terror rushing to both of them. Huh? No, no, no, she wasn't raped by Alfi.

'Koji, Rian, help me!' Bunga plead.

'Wh.. What's wrong?!' Rian exclaimed.

'Andos! When we on our way here, he and his gang crashed Alfi's motorcycle and attacked us. Alfi tried to hold them back and told me to run. I don't know what happened after that, but one thing I am sure is he will kill Alfi.' Bunga explained.

'That dirtbag!' Koji looked upset.

Suddenly, her phone rang and she picked it up. She nodded and ended the call.

'Alfi is on the deepest base of the parking lot. Anto will go saving him.' Bunga said.

'I'm going!' Koji exclaimed.

'Don't! You do know that he is just too strong for you, don't you?' Bunga said.

'He is my friend! As his friend, I have to save him no matter what kind of enemy I have to encounter.' Koji said.

'I agree. I'm also his friend.' Rian added. 'Not to mention that the dirtbag is a moron. I guess I know how to defeat him.' He added taking a bottle of balsam.

'Balsam?' Bunga looked hesitated.

'Just trust me, Ok? Let's go!' Rian exclaimed running to the deepest base of the parking lot.

Meanwhile, Alfi was lying there being beaten up by some guys with wooden staffs and iron staffs. They beat Alfi mercilessly. Andos approached him with a gaze full of hatred.

'WHY THE HELL YOU DON'T DIE ALREADY?!' Andos exclaimed kicking Alfi's head really hard that he coughed blood.

Even so, Alfi was alive as Andos could hear his heavy breath. Andos felt irritated and flicked his finger. His crew stopped beating him and forced him to sit on a Chitose chair.

'You are gonna die!' Andos exclaimed.

'Just do as you wish.' Alfi said.

'Very well.' Andos flicked his finger.

His crews set some clips on Alfi's body. Ears, nose, mouth, cheeks, chin, fingers, chest, genital, etc. He saw that all those clips were connected to a generator. Andos turned it on to maximum power causing him not getting electrocuted, but struck. His body was jolting and he was screaming loudly because of the immense current of electricity which struck him, yet he didn't die.

'You son of a bitch! How many times I should torture you till you become a goner?!' Andos exclaimed irritatedly.

Alfi was till in such a condition, yet he was still alive.

'Just let him be till the generator explodes. I'm fed up already. You are such an eyesore.' Andos spits on Alfi's face.

'Stop it already!' A spiky guy entered. He stood there with crews more than Andos' behind him.

'Anto?!' Andos seemed irritated. 'Wreck them all!' He shouted.

Andos' crews were charging to Anto's as well as Anto's crews were charging to Andos'. Anto swiftly defeated them one by one as he had a black belt level on Pencak Silat martial arts. Andos joined the fray to encounter Anto. Koji and Rian took the chance to save Alfi, yet Andos who realized it was about to chase them, yet Anto managed to hold him.

'Quick! Turn it off!' Anto exclaimed.

Koji and Rian were almost there. Andos kept hitting Anto with his elbow that Anto let him go. Andos took a leap to get them. Rian swiftly threw the balsam to Andos' face that the bottle broke and the balsam smeared on his face. Andos felt the heat that he fell to the ground. Koji and Rian were about to run, yet their feet were held by Andos' arms.

"Dammit!" Koji and Rian couldn't believe that Andos could fight in such a condition.

'Do you think you can stop me with such a cheap trick? You do underestimate me!' He exclaimed getting up spinning them and throwing them that they crashed the wall.

Suddenly Andos saw the generator flying to his direction and crashing him right to himself. He lied and got up immediately.

'So you come, Alfi.' Andos saw Alfi who gave him a gaze full of wrath like a berserk devil.

'DO NOT EVER HURT MY FRIENDS!' Alfi shouted rushing towards Andos.

Andos tried to hold Alfi's fist, yet his fist was too strong. Alfi kept jabbing Ando's body and head mercilessly that blood spurted from his nose and mouth. Alfi then strangled him really tightly that Andos couldn't breathe. Alfi ran to the wall and swang Andos against the wall mercilessly like a swordsman swings his sword against the tree.

'Alfi....' Koji couldn't believe to what he saw.

'You know, Alfi is actually a nice guy. He is actually stronger than Andos, but he doesn't want anyone to be afraid of him. He just wants everyone to acknowledge who he really is. Probably the cause why he didn't want to fight is he doesn't want to lose us as probably if he did, we would be afraid of him instead.' Rian said.

'I'm not afraid of him. I wanna be his friend. Just like me. I need a friend, not an enemy.' Koji said.

'We are his friends.' Rian smiled.

Bunga hugged Alfi from the back and his wrath was somehow cooled down.

'Please stop.' Bunga sobbed.

Alfi then turned around and hugged her.

'I'm sorry.' He said.

Koji, Rian, and Anto came to them. Alfi let her go and said, 'Sorry for troubling you again, Anto.'

'That's what a friend for, isn't it?' He answered.

'It's clear, isn't it?' Koji added.

'Sorry that you had to see me like that.' Alfi felt sorry. 'Please don't be afraid of me. I just need a friend.' He added.

'What are you talking about? Of course, we are your friends!' Koji said.

'Friends should understand each other, right? If such a thing makes us afraid of you or hates you, do we deserve to be your friend?' Rian asked.

Hearing that made Alfi realize something. He had found 2 persons whom he could consider as friends. Alfi was grateful for finding both of them.

'Then, what about him? Shall we kill him?' Rian asked.

'Nah, he will wake up by himself. Such trash even isn't worth killing. If we do, I will be inferior to him.' Alfi said.

'My man is really wonderful.' Bunga pinched his cheek.

'Ouch.'

Koji and Rian hugged Alfi. Alfi also hugged both of them.

'You are a moron, yet you are wonderful.' Rian said.

'We will always be your friends.' Koji said.

'Thank you.' Alfi smiled.

'Homo.' Bunga and Anto said in disgust.

'We aren't!' They three exclaimed upset.

Day by day passed. Alfi, Koji, and Rian got along well that they were called "The Homo Trio" as they were always together that people suspected them always had a threesome every night.