On August 30, 2018, Hanchung High School officially opened. Today is not like freshmen training. There are no third-year seniors - selected from the student self-governance brigade - to lead the class. The freshmen in their respective classes seem a little cramped.
Except for the tutors of each subject who come to class on time and the class teacher who inspects classes on time during lunch break, these freshmen are the only ones doing what they want to do during the rest of the time.
Since there are about 2 weeks of summer tutoring during the summer vacation, some students have already met each other.
Teenagers at this stage have particularly close relationships with their peers and have stronger social skills than during junior high school. Therefore, in less than a week - especially in Class 9th Grade 1 - most of them have already made friends with 3 or 4 friends, and memorized the names of all the classmates.
Class 9th Grade 1, is the most special among all freshmen classes. In addition to 31 students, there are 6 or 7 LGBT students, and there is also an emerging internet celebrity with more than 50,000 fans on social media. And because she is well-known among the freshman group, this internet celebrity not only attracted a lot of praise, but also a lot of infamy.
Fortunately, her psychological self-construction was pretty good, and she picked herself up again after being depressed for a few days.
In the eyes of Yu Ruoling, who was still under the influence of severe PTSD, Xiao Mushuang immediately became the object of her most envy.
It's not anything else, but psychological quality.
Why can't she do it when others can do it？Why can Xiao Mushuang resist hundreds of malicious messages, but she can't resist attacks from only 29 people？
Why is she so different from others？Why is she so cowardly？Why can't she do anything right？
During the second period of physical education class on Thursday afternoon, she used the excuse of a headache to her physical education teacher and fled the playground alone.
The physical education teacher of this school year treats them quite freely. As long as they are within 200 meters of the playground, the students can go wherever they want, as long as they don't sleep.
She left the playground as a matter of course. After nearly two weeks of abuse, hiding in the toilet at noon every day became her biggest comfort. As well as updating the weather forecasts for "Jerusalem" and "Xiaogang Area" every two classes, and checking all the messages in the LINE system, at least this gave her a sense of security that she was temporarily out of school.
Yu Ruoling watched them sweating and swearing on the basketball court, while she nestled on the second step of the flag-raising platform and began to look up at the sky expressionlessly.
The breeze blew slowly, carrying her long black hair that was scattered around her shoulders.
The weather should have been perfect for a vacation and travel, but she once again returned to this large prison without real handcuffs and shackles.
She shouldn't be here now, she should get out of here and do something meaningful.
Yu Ruoling's eyes gradually blurred and merged with the thin white clouds floating in the sky.
It would be nice if she could be invisible..., she thought, returning to reality as the bell finally rang. She dragged her steps faster and faster, trying to get back to the classroom before everything was over so as not to encounter crowds of people when she walked in.
'Bah...bah！'
She was suddenly grabbed by a slender hand that was slightly cold and dry. In front of her, a truck that came to send goods for the school welfare club picked up the dust on the ground. Seeing that she did not continue forward, it turned right without slowing down at all.
And left the school gate.
Yu Ruoling was stunned and looked down at the hand holding her.
"Why don't you be careful？"Li Chengguang was half a head shorter than her. Even though Li was small, she was a powerful figure who was just shy of a black belt in Taekwondo.
"I saw that you kept walking and didn't notice the car."
"Ah...thank you."
"Maybe we can go together？I'm in the same class as you！"Li Chengguang couldn't help but took her arm and walked straight up the stairs to the entrance.
Even Li obviously looks more like a junior high school student than her, but the strength in her hands is full of strength. Yu Ruoling clenched her fists and found that although Li Chengguang's force was very light on the surface, in fact, most of the energy was hidden in her hands.
If Li Chengguang had a bag in her hand and it was robbed by a thief on a motorcycle, she would probably be able to pull the thief off the motorcycle with her bare hands without having to squat down to increase the gravitational force.
…Very scary… Yu Ruoling endured the extreme disgust in her heart at being contacted by a stranger of her own age, and tried to analyze Li to divert her attention.
Unexpectedly, Li Chengguang turned out to be a master with extremely high martial arts.
"You..., "She couldn't help but ask, "have you ever studied martial arts？"
Li Chengguang, who had already run up the stairs to the second floor, almost stumbled and fell down the steps when she heard her words.
"You...how do you know？！You are so awesome！"
"Look at your posture and strength. "She glanced at her held arm, "It feels different."
"I have learned a lots, because I watched Detective Conan when I was a kid, so I really like martial arts~ "Li Chengguang stopped her hurried steps and walked slowly, while counting, "Well~ I have learned Taekwondo, Karate, Jeet Kune Do, and One thing that is quite special is the stick technique. Ah！"
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Li gave a rather self-satisfied smile, "My favorites are karate and taekwondo. In the former, I entered the national competition and won the runner-up in the high school women's group. In the latter, I was just one step away from getting a black belt！"
Are you Mao Lilan？Yu Ruoling really wanted to ask this question, and was slightly less wary of Li Chengguang's sincere communication. Besides, Li looks and feels like her younger sister, which at least allows her to ignore the fact that this classmate is her own age.
She sincerely praised "It's amazing" and said nothing again. After sitting back in her seat, she looked at the "Erling Church" sign erected high outside the window and sighed inwardly.
"Really want to go back..."She thought to herself.
There was a whole sheet of mathematical formulas on the blackboard, but Yu Ruoling had no intention of understanding it. Even though the math teacher is a very kind and sweet person, after the first class, she basically didn't listen to the "Numbers and Sequences" in the first section of the first chapter - powers, polynomial equations, absolute value inequalities, logarithms... How much goes in.
Yu looked at the math textbook that had been marked out everywhere, and her mind was extremely confused. The past, present, future, and courses were all intertwined together. She sighed again and took out her phone during the break to immerse herself in the novels of the Marvel universe.
A few rows apart, Xiao Mushuang and Li Chengguang were in separate camps, divided into two small circles and happily gathered together to chat. Laughter, shouts, and exclamations continued to come out, forming a very sharp contrast with the little place she was in.
But she really lowered her sense of existence so much that no one noticed that in the second seat in the first row - in the corner of the class - sat a person who looked withdrawn, cold and hard, but who was actually soft, weak and sad on the inside. A person who get confused easily.
No one found out. Even Li Chengguang, who saw her almost being sent to the sky by a truck to become a star after class last period, didn't notice that a transparent glass barrier automatically formed around Yu Ruoling's body, and not only was her sense of existence eliminated without a trace, and breath - that kind of chemical signal belonging to humans - disappeared with it. Just like the invisibility cloak in the Harry Potter series, and like Loki's invisibility illusion in the Marvel universe.
She looked at the big characters "Erling Church" outside the window, feeling a little pain in her chest and her vision was a little blurry.
*
Two months have passed. Every day during this period, when she opened her eyes and realized that a new round of torture was about to begin, she was immediately followed by nausea, vomiting, dizziness, headache, restlessness, and a heavy feeling in her chest.
Carrying a piece of landslide rock.
In particular, burying her head in a pile of books so as to forget where she was not only did not bring her any psychological benefits - if she successfully ranked among the top 50 in the first section test of Hanchung High School - on the contrary alienating her from the world（or reality）.
A total of 40 textbooks, novels, trying to write novels, listening to music, and playing the piano did not relax her at all, and the heavy and heavy life returned to her body again.
Yu Ruoling looked the same as she did six years ago after being crushed by that person. Those peach fox-liked eyes - eyes that were supposed to be full of life, with the corners of the eyebrows slightly raised with interest - gradually cooled down. Her pitch-black pupils were like the deep, dark and dangerous depths of the universe.
Looking into them, one could only feel sharp fear, like an evil spirit released from hell. Even Li Chengguang was a little scared.
In the past few weeks, she only dared to look at Yu Ruoling's eyebrows when speaking to her, because it was polite to look at the person opposite when talking, but she really did not dare to look directly into Yu's eyes.
Li Chengguang couldn't describe that feeling. The only thing she can describe is probably the defense mechanism that was activated all over her body in the next second. To put it simply, it is the sense of threat that one cannot help but want to attack in order to protect oneself.
When Yu Ruoling called her from behind to give her the test paper, she accidentally met Yu's eyes. Li Chengguang guaranteed her status as a quasi-black belt, and she patted Yu's shoulder to express her gratitude -
- Originally it was for the neck. Fortunately, she endured it... She looked at her hands afterwards and thought about it, something was really wrong with Yu Ruoling.
Should she go to the class teacher and ask？Li Chengguang was in a daze while listening to the class, thinking, what if something really happened？In the end, she still didn’t tell the class teacher. Due to Yu Ruoling's sudden change in aura, Li Chengguang was confused to a certain extent.
After school on the first Tuesday in early October, Yu Ruoling got on the bus and went home. Today is as usual, she have a headache, dizziness, nausea, and a sense of unreality.
Her steps on the asphalt road seem to be stepping on the clouds. She couldn't explain this ethereal feeling clearly, but she seemed to be in a world of her own, and the chaos of time and space made it impossible for her to identify who she was.
Yu Ruoling is denying her own existence, and what she is doing now is just a body.
Like a zombie, she does what she has to do mechanically like a walking zombie.
As she walked quickly, the setting sun cast a long, long shadow. Her long hair was spread around her slender waist, swaying in the wind, and her eyes were dead.
It was just a word of "useless" at first, but it actually took root in her heart and mind. The paralyzing happiness of junior high school made her gradually ignore everything in the past, and Fong Xuan's signals also became much weaker.
But ignoring does not mean forgetting.
The numbness will eventually lose its effect just like anesthetics. Anesthesia depends on time, and the invalid key to paralysis is Hanchung High School.
The memory came back like a raging tsunami. The impact of tens of millions of feet made her unable to stand firm. She could only float and sink with the water. It seemed that there was an undercurrent whirlpool surrounding her, like the withered and skinny skeletal hands and tentacles of a ghost, trying to drag her down.
Enter hell.
Because she was trampled down like a slave, because she was a waste, because she did something extremely stupid, because she believed in that person...
What else does she do well？There is nothing she does well. She can't do anything well.
At the same time, Yu Ruoling heard Fong Xuan's voice again. Not as a protective bodyguard, but as a second personality, she actually heard the voice of the personality.
Yu Ruoling was stunned on the sofa. At that moment, she had a headache, dizziness and an unreal feeling, and everything stopped functioning temporarily.
Originally, she was already a person with a somewhat sensitive constitution. She could more or less be aware of the situation in the fourth space. She could also occasionally hear the voice of God, see visions, and have strange dreams.
Except for Fong Xuan -
- She heard His voice again. That gentle, safe, warm, stable, soft,…
Everything is out of ordinary.
The music playing on her cell phone at the time was "Balm of My Soul" by the Joshua Band. When the soft and beautiful melody reached the bridge, after the words "You are worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, glory to my Lord", a foggy scene suddenly appeared in front of her eyes.
Due to the death of the two fog balls, the space gradually became clearer. Even though there were still dozens of floating fog balls twice as wide as the bus, the sight was much brighter than before.
She was a little stunned by the size of the mind world. For the first time, she realized its vastness and height. It was almost the same as a normal real world, or even larger - because she could not know everything about what was contained in this space - and the "space" divided by Fong Xuan, this "Room" is probably a block larger than Zhonggang Junior High School.
She didn't dare to wander around this area even when she was sleeping but occasionally woke up, and her range of activities was already about the size of a Zhonggang junior high school. And she had never left the scope of the "room". Only Fong Xuan and Him knew the true appearance, breadth, and depth of the mind world.
Since the location was different every time she came in, Yu Ruoling stood there for a while before she could figure out where this place was.