I wonder what mother will evolve into? Should I even stick around? I mean what is the worst that can happen, she eats me….

Ah crap that is a real possibility, I have got you all figured out mother, you are going to wake up some big and bad monster and eat me! I can already see it happening, the spike impaling me and draining until I am a husk.

...If that is the case should I drain her, first? If I was to go about this logically, it probably would be the best option, I mean when she wakes up and she becomes stronger than I can control. She is either

a.) Going to attempt to eat me.

b.)Take me with her to throw some more.

c.)Leave me alone, and we never see eachother again.

And which one of those circumstances do I benefit from her being alive. That's right, none!

On the other hand, she was the one who gave me life, there is a connection between us, albeit a very poor and corroded looking one but a connection nonetheless.

I begin to think of another possibility that might work in my favor...Maybe I could tame her, and have my own buff mom follow me around in this cave, and rule over the lizards! That might be worth a shot. Can I even tame monsters, probably not, but it is worth a shot, after all it is the only option where I benefit and don't have to put her down. My previous evolution lasted 6 hours and I don't know how long hers is gonna last but, at bare minimum it can't be shorter than mine, so that means I'm on the clock.

Alright, it is time to enact plan, uhhh what should I call it? I think back on my previous life. Hmmm, well I had a friend named Tom in middle school, he was a pretty chill guy for being a 7th grader. Alright, in honor of Tom, I shall call this plan Tamer Of Moms or T.O.M. for short, and shall make all the 12 year olds envious of my ability to tame Moms.

Operation T.O.M. is separated into multiple parts. First, I need to figure out if it is even possible to tame a monster, I will do this by throwing food at slow or weak monsters and see if they still try to kill me. Then I will gather a bunch of those weak monsters and kill them and leave them in front of Mother, and also throw some at her so she knows who brought it. And then if all goes well, BAM! Plan T.O.M. is a success and I get my mom to solve all my problems for me.

Alright but first before that, I need to hide Mom, otherwise while I'm out and about something can come and kill her before I can attempt to tame her. But, what can I use to hide a large beach ball sized bubble. My options don't include cloth or leaves but instead, include dirt and rocks. I stretch my limbs to make a pile of dirt and I start tossing clumps of dirt at the black bubble and with a few pebbles thrown in the mix for good measure. Eventually, after defeating a couple of spiders and a lizard by bashing them against the wall and draining them, that's what they get for being too nosy. I eventually manage to pile enough dirt that I could still tell that it was a black bubble hidden underneath a thin layer of dirt, but I doubt anything else could, except maybe a wolf, they have been known to test would be boulders.

Ehh, I'm sure it will be fine! Right, GladOs don't you agree?

(...)

You know what upgrade my Regeneration with Usability, I am tired of wasting so much Biomass and if it helps out even a little it could save me so much of it from being drained by stupid spiders and lizards and possibily other things with their poison. Also I haven't consumed any Biomass since evolving it has been...what like a day? Oh, and upgrade my eye sight it is still not nearly as far as a humans.

(Confirmed, Upgrading the hosts Regeneration (usability) to (weak) and Radar Sense (Distance) to (Slightly Far), cost 17 Biomass, remaining amount 5)

Well, good thing I drained those spiders and lizards, regeneration must be pretty expensive to upgrade, makes sense, but I like cheap things.

(You have consumed 2 Biomass)

What?! I was just thinking about this, I guess evolving into an endurance baby had some more perks, it seems to have reduced my Biomass intake a third. So, I now require 2 Biomass once per day instead of 1 three times per day. Alright... what was I doing again, ah that's right, time to try and tame something.

And on I go, who should be the first test subject, I would say a lizard but, I have a vendetta against that species and it would be a little hypocritical if I tamed one while also mercilessly killing his species. Anyways let's just see what I find.

This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

I head away from where I have crudley turned my mother into a boulder and head toward a more open cavern. I see a lot more of my surroundings now, I can look around all these corners and see...nothing.

What happened to all the monsters fighting like it was going out of style, where is the wolf banging his head against a wall, and where is my damn coffee! Ehh, but seriously guys, you can come out now it is kinda eerie, never thought I would say that about a lack of horrible monstrosities, but here I am.

How am I the only one who didn't get the memo. I'm supposed to be the smart one! I mean it is so eerie, there is no sound, no movement, just nothing. I think I'm gonna go, you know I'm not that curious about the lack of monsters.

*crack*

If I didn't get my increased Radar sense I may not have seen nor felt/heard it. But, on the outer edge of the previous violent cesspit of rocks, a crack appeared on the ground that glowed brightly.

*RUMBLE!*

Alright, activate Flashy Flesh, it's time to bail at maximum output. I fling my body using a tendril to get maximum speed as I run back the way I came from. And BOY AM I GLAD I DID!

*crackcrackCRACKcrackcrackCRACKcrack...*

The floor cracks all around and looks like it is descending into hell itself as a glow permeates through the floor and I can see a misty gas forming behind me as it escapes from the floor and quickly rushes and fills the room before coming down all the different tunnels. Is the gas friendly, I wouldn't know, but seeing hells farts spew out of the ground itself is not giving me much hope in that regard.

IT'S A TSUNAMI OF GAS, ARE YOU KIDDING ME, AND IT IS FAST!! I CAN'T OUTRUN THAT FOR LONG, I NEED SHELTER, ANYTHING!!!

There are no cracks or holes that I can see nearby, I continue rolling back at top speed but the gas is gaining on me, leaving a grim future ahead in about ehh, give or take 30 seconds?

[Stamina Stat:

46/100

I use Fleshy Flashy around a corner to turn faster, consuming even more stamina, the gas slams into the ‘L’ shaped wall I just turned and continues making its way left, still gaining on me but that wall may have bought me about 3 seconds. I turn another corner and do the same thing and see Mothers dirt bubble getting nibbled on by a blind wolf.

DAMN YOU WOLF THAT WAS PROBABLY THE ONLY BOULDER IN YOUR LIFE THAT WAS NOT ACTUALLY A BOULDER!!

I see a gash in mothers side from the wolf and the gas rushing behind me and get an idea.

Mother, I know I was gonna try and tame you and you were also the only thing in this cave that didn't ‘directly’ try to kill me. But, as they say in Rome desperate times call for desperate shelter!

I completely ignore the wolf and I revert to my foot long pill body and 2 large tendrils pop out from it, they reach and spread apart the wound. And I cram my body inside as fast as suctionly possible. I make sure not to drain her as I need my shelter to be as durable as possible to weather the oncoming hell farts.

As I squirm around in her body, I can't see anything which would be normal for a human but not for me. As a monster who can peer around corners using mumbo jumbo magic or whatever, it is quite worrying not being able to see at all.

*wooooooooosh!*

*ARRRRrrrr…*

I hear the gas pass and not in a funny way. The wolf lets out a yelp, before it dissipates amid the onrushing wind of gas, definitely evil gas by the sound of that yelp.

Also about that wolf, SCREW YOU FOR EATING MY MOTHER ONLY I CAN DO THAT, LET THE HELL GAS TAKETH YOUR SOUL AWAY AND MAY YOUR SINS BE PURGED ALONG WITH IT!!! MAY THE TRUE GAS GOD FIND YOUR SOUL WORTHY TO DESCEND AND SMITE UPO…!!

----------------------------------------

...Meanwhile, at the surface in a blaring office building.

“Drop the briefcase!” Yelled a police officer at a young woman wearing black military clothing and a black mask and hood concealing her face, making her look like a hardened assassin. I mean she did that too but, it was more part time.

The concrete the police officer is standing on pulls off the floor and knocks him off his feet as she jumps out the 5th story window and some of the bricks on the outside of the building pop out of their spot in the wall and allow her to move quickly down the side of the building.

She jumps off the last brick and rolls on the ground, determined to keep this briefcase in her grasp. The moonlight bounces off her black hair that flows out from the hood.

Having escaped from the police at the top floor of the large complex, she runs over to the steel bars that surround the building and they bend to allow her flexible body to move through.

She ducks into the alleys and around a few distant sirens as she makes her way into a dilapidated apartment building. She pops open the briefcase to make sure it has what she needs.

Inside is a series of extremely well filed and alphabetically organized descriptions including weaknesses, about the heroes on the city's paycheck.

As you can probably tell, she is a thief and not only that she is also a geomancer, what with the bending of metal and rock. She places her hand on the destroyed fire alarm of the building and pulls it, instead of an alarm going off though, a hardened steel door opens up from the wall and she makes her way down.

“Ahh, your back I take it went well?” An eloquent gentleman in a lab coat greets her as she comes down the secret entrance.

“Here.” She says using as few words as possible, which in this case was just one. She hands him the briefcase.

“Ahh, A woman of few words, you know I'm still quite surprised you managed to pass the interview, although it is not as surprising as seeing what you have brought in front of me.” He opens the metal briefcase and skims through each file. It doesn't have all the heroes but it does at the very least contain some very pesky ones, seemingly satisfied he closes the briefcase and it snaps shut.

“Good job, err you can go now, go talk to Barlos for your payment, and I have another job for you in a week.” He says waving her away.

“Week?” She asks quietly, slightly confused.

“Why yes, you may not have seen all the news about it but a gas volcano has erupted about a 100 miles away and I need you to collect some samples from it. I would have you go sooner but that gas is quite dangerous even for a geomancer and it will need to dissipate before you can collect samples, also you just got done with this.” He says and holds up the briefcase.

“Thanks.” She replies not knowing if she should be grateful for her boss giving her a week off or mad that she will have to go into an erupted gas volcano in a week.

Not seeing any more reason to talk to her boss anymore. She quickly collects her payment from Barlos,the quartermaster, and goes to a simple concrete room with a bed, shower, and table. She takes a shower and changes out of her work clothes and into some more comfortable sleepwear before, getting in bed and moving on to tomorrow, and for some reason having a dream about being spanked by a weird white tentacle monster.