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Chapter 66

The progress of the hunt unfolded in a most unfavorable manner for Margrave Conrad. It had taken a week to scrounge up every last copper he had to his name and that of his progeny to afford the services of the dragon hunters. Another month had been spent mustering said dragon hunters from six different knightly orders to form this crusade. Add on one more month just to travel into position and months beyond that waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike, and the investment of time and money had been both beyond reasonable and unfruitful considering the circumstances.

The [Prophet] of his crusade had foreseen this Scenario, and he had worked backwards through the many branches of Destiny to find a path that would guarantee this ambush. If only the fool had paid more attention, he would have seen his own demise. Instead, the worthless lout now lay bleeding out like a stuck pig as some insanity took those nearby who had then cut him down. Perhaps that pesky [Oracle] was to blame. The [Prophet] had kept complaining about constant interference in wrangling the desired future, but had made assurances that all was also well in hand. Fool him, to believe he could wrest control of the Outcome and force the desired Fate from an [Oracle]. However, Margrave Conrad had no other recourse, for his coffers lacked the funds to also field his own [Oracle], and so he had made do.

The day had started with 512 men and women, experts all in the ways of dragon hunting, here at the ambush site itself, with another 100 screening the Emperor’s reinforcements. Not a single one of the Emperor’s bodyguards, sans a handful of kobolds, were dead. With nothing to show for his efforts, Margrave Conrad would face ridicule and harsh punishment if he scurried home with his tail between his legs, so the time to do or die approached.

At least the terrifying woman in full plate had been knocked away by that brute of an orc. Ideally, said orc and the rest of the dragon hunters would die so that they would not need to be paid in full, but such an outcome only boded well if the Emperor also died. As such, the first part of the plan was going swimmingly, but that second part remained vexingly out of reach. The Titans, which were completely unprecedented, and, quite frankly, unfair, had probably scored half of the kills. Well, not directly, but between the one or two dozen hydras that showed up and the insane dragon hunters cutting each other down, the distinction was practically without difference. However, the Titans would soon run their course, for their vessel would not be sufficient to house them for long.

Once the hydra that hosted the Titans collapsed from exhaustion, Margrave Conrad would send the rest of his hunters after the escaped Princess Nanu. With her out of the way, Margrave Conrad would duel the Emperor. He could almost hear the adulation of his peers, could almost see the smug smiles on the faces of his betters washed away by the tides of his triumph. The details were all prepared, the rest was but execution. The jig would be up once he took his own draconic form, for the hunters would not take kindly to being duped by a dragon. Best that none live to tell the tale.

But still, 512 hunters at the ambush had been overkill. There should have been no need for Margrave Conrad to take the field himself, but perhaps good help is hard to find. The largest hunt he had ever been on the receiving end of had been against 30 hunters, and Margrave Conrad had only made it out by the skin of his teeth. How a veritable army of Adventurers of Platinum or better quality had perished in a single hunt would overload the rumor mills for decades.

Soon this whole charade would come to a close and then he could wash his hands of it. For Margrave Conrad had faced more trials and tribulations than this upstart whelp of an Emperor and would not be bested by such a neophyte.

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The situation currently appeared slightly better than grim. My Boys had grown some interesting heads. I couldn’t tell who exactly they were, but I knew them to be powerful and ancient. They had turned the tides in our favor for a while, but their power waned. Chrysippus and Aristotle appeared to be exhausted. Both focused entirely on defense and their movements were noticeably sluggish. Nanu and I had done our best to guard their flanks, but all of us were injured in dozens of places by weapons that inhibited regenerative Abilities. Even during the fight, I had used what extra Experience Points I had reserved for emergencies to unlock more Skills like [Regeneration Inhibition Mitigation]. It certainly helped, but it would not win me the battle. Too bad more experience would not be awarded until after the battle concluded.

In short, we would need to rout the enemy soon or we would perish. Already, I began concentrating on an Ability to send The Boys to safety with a Skill that was similar to summoning them, but in reverse. They would return when the Skill ran its course, so I could not simply retreat after sending them off or they would be slain by the hunters.

Skull had been sent flying, but fortunately, Hopper had seen to her rescue. My [Observers] and [Overseers] kept an eye on the fight, and slowly but surely, one of my most potent traps was sliding its way over there just beneath the surface of the ground. I had invested in Skills to ensure Skull and my pets could all see my traps, so they would know to lure their opponent onto it. Unfortunately, Skull and Hopper either remained out of range for me to telepathically communicate with them or something jammed such an Ability. I felt confident they would figure it out once they saw the trap, so hopefully they would play it safe and stall in the meantime.

The fighting over here had stalled out. Those that remained of the hunters were freed of insanity, and likewise, most of the supporting hydras were out of commission. Six-Heads was noticeably in the fight, but four of her heads were now replacements. It was worth noting that two heads replaced each one of hers that was lost, so perhaps The Boys would soon get such an upgrade to their replacements, assuming we survived the fight. The enemy seemed to be aware that The Boys would soon collapse, so they prowled at our flanks like a pack of wolves as they looked for an opening.

Surprisingly, the kobold choir had been unmolested this whole time. Their music suddenly turned more solemn with a tinge of remorse, and so I felt clued into a change of some sort happening somewhere, which was vague, but I kept my eyes peeled.

“We tire, Emperor, and soon the burden of Fate will be squarely on your shoulders.”

I heard The Boys speaking in my mind, which was normal, but abnormal in that it was their guest heads and not any of The Boys themselves. That had never happened in sparring matches, so I assumed that such replacements simply could not or would not speak to me. At the same time, I could physically hear his voice, which was sing-song in nature but unintelligible. Whoever he was, he looked at me, and given the lull in battle, I looked back at him in turn. Indeed, all eyes of everyone present appeared to be upon him, as if the majesty of his presence demanded it. But then he turned his head skyward with sorrow and longing, and the storm clouds parted to show… a patch of stars in the sky?

“Witness, One True Moon, how those loathsome usurpers tarnish your sacred vigil with these wretched pretenders. Shamelessly, they vaunt the theft of your name from the Annals of the World-Heart as they persist in shrouding your dance through the heavens.” While the rest of the clouds dispersed into nothingness, he lowered his head to look at me eye to eye as he continued. “Emperor, guardian of my favored sons; hear me! Cast down these false idols and restore her to her rightful throne and I will grant you a boon. So do I, Hercules, Firstborn of my kind and Titan of this world, swear unto you.”

I didn’t really understand everything he had said, but it sounded important, so I would add that to my to-do list. I did seem a little non-sequitur considering we were in the middle of a fight, but perhaps it had been on his mind for a while now and he wanted to vent. Everyone knew there were three moons: Vipassana, Therodroxries, and Lun-Ka. A spare glance showed that indeed all five were in the sky right now. Wait, five moons! My head started to hurt until I looked away for a moment, only for three moons to remain in the sky as expected after I cleared my mind. Perhaps some [Illusionist] with the hunters was up to some sort of trick with the moons. Then, the other guest head turned to speak to me as well.

“Hubby can be overdramatic at times. Thank you for looking after The Boys for us. We will be returning to The Void soon, but we look forward to helping our heirs again in the future. I am Heracles, Firstborn of my kind and a Titan as well. We have left a memory packet for The Boys, so if you survive this fight, have them look through it so that all those questions you want to ask the two of us will be answered. Ta-ta for now!”

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With that, the two Titans wrapped their necks around each other, the embrace seemingly affectionate as the bottom of their jaws rested against one another. Without much further ado, their necks fell off the main body, each severed at the base, and within moments, both had rotted away into nothingness. Two seconds later, The Boys staggered as droopy eyes struggled to remain open. With a giant yawn from the only two remaining heads, they collapsed onto their belly, tucked their legs up, craned their necks to rest their heads upon their body, and fell asleep.

With the Titans now departed, the hunters crept forward, the bravest among them releasing a warcry and charging forwards only to meet their demise swiftly at the claws and fangs of Nanu. Without hesitation, I finished channeling the Ability to send The Boys away and recited the pesky incantation.

“I invoke the contract that is our bond, and as your master, I command you, Boys, depart posthaste that I may call upon your services at the hour of my choosing!”

Golden light circled the sleeping Boys, and their body slowly sank into its gentle embrace before disappearing entirely. When they had completed their departure, the light also faded, and without their presence, the remaining hunters felt emboldened. The kobold choir resumed their normal hymn of battle, which I now realized had been a lullaby when The Boys went to sleep. Perhaps fatigue was getting the better of me, for such details were coming to my conscious mind far too slowly for my liking.

“Surrender, Emperor, and I will spare your companions. You cannot win this fight.”

One of the hunters had stepped forward as if from some concealing illusion. I really needed to invest in more Skills to detect illusions, for he could have suckerpunched me if he had wanted to. His challenge needed a response, and considering how tired I felt, I didn’t waste the effort on showing much dignity.

“That’s just, like, your opinion, man. Besides, if these dragon hunters want to bag a dragon trophy, they should just kill you and call it a day.” The hunters looked taken aback by my statement as they glanced at their supposed leader. “That’s right, you’ve been hoodwinked. That guy there,” I shouted as I pointed a clawed hand at him, “is a dragon pretending to be a human.”

The leader-guy-dragon looked rather enraged by my statement, and a glance at Nanu suggested that I had committed some kind of faux-pas. I don’t know what kind of messed up rules demand that I don’t out a dragon leading a dragon hunt against me, but fuck it, he had brought a army against me, and that felt unsportsmanlike. I don’t see why I should extend such courtesy to someone who fights dirty. His men hesitated, as some mulled over my statement while others looked ready to take me up on the offer of easier prey.

“Preposterous, he’s bluffing because he is on his last leg. Everyone, attack the Princess and then we will take down the Emperor!”

With that counter-offer apparently being some sort of strange compromise which was noticeably divorced of sound logic, the bulk of the dragon hunters snapped out of their musings on target-selection to charge Nanu, leaving me without opposition. That changed in a heartbeat as cheeky coils of blood sprung up out of the earth, and like great springs, they launched me up and over the enemy dragon. The coils continued to expand and push the whole way, and while they lacked the potency to pierce my scales, they performed admirably in separating me from Nanu. Just how long had this bastard been working on sneaking that in on me anyway?

While I did free myself from the blood coils and landed deftly on the ground behind my apparent opponent, I was indeed isolated, sans for It-Has-Pockets, who had grabbed ahold of my tail during that spring attack. As I assessed the situation, I observed Ribbette stayed near Nanu to assist in fighting off the four-score or so that assailed her. A few dragon hunters remained indecisive, and if the glint in their eye suggested anything, opportunistic and not at all picky about which dragon they took home as a trophy. As long as I could keep them at my opponent’s back, maybe I could get them to cheapshot him.

“Well then, let’s get this over with. I have a triumph to attend and your head will soon adorn my hoard.”

Arrogant and rude. My head would at least be the centerpiece of his hoard. No accounting for taste I guess. Too tired for a good witty reply, I just gave a rude one.

“When I win, I may find a trash collector that will deign to carry your head to the refuse pile, but most likely, I may need to settle for a gong farmer.”

That pissed him off. His face turned an unhealthy shade of crimson as he bared his teeth at me. He transformed into a dragon without delay, but not being a true gentleman, I launched a breath attack of a single and solid metal spike at him as he did so, which buried itself a few inches in his shoulder. Enraged, he charged at me. I guess it would have been proper to let him power up first or whatever, maybe even shout the names of my Abilities as I used them, but I was never big on such impolitic niceties. Fatigued, but not exhausted, I stuck to my training and began the dance with death. Two dragons enter, one dragon leaves.

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It-Has-Pockets had been lost in the dance, her body gracefully moving to the rhythm of battle as her mind drifted through the movements. She had remained both keenly focused and detached from the world, much like a vivid dream where you casually make choices in direction without consciously taking action to change how it unfolds. Her body knew what to do, and her sword knew how to cut flesh and bone alike, all she had to do was enable both to perform.

What a surprise it had been to perform a [Rain Dance]. She had somehow understood the hydra, not so much in words, but in intent, for a true [Dancer] knows how to comprehend any specific request to perform. Delight had flooded through her and laughter had escaped her lips as she discovered the reason for the request. The pattern of lightning strikes sang to her, and she in turn had stomped her feet to the rhythm of the unfortunate and unwary being struck down. Even more of a surprise had been the audience that had witnessed her dance. Were it not for [Discern Patron], she would have not known them to have been actual Titans, and it had taken all her willpower to not openly tremble before them. Auspicious that they were on her side, for she did not desire to test her skill against them.

When utter chaos had broken out, men and women had cut each other down in droves. Some had even rushed her or her inamorato, which she had cut down without even breaking her dance. To be fair, she couldn’t choose to attack them, for [Go With The Flow] and [Feel The Rhythm] both depended on her continuing the dance and carrying out vague instructions or movements. She could do things like defend herself or advance in a certain direction while cutting down foes along the way, but she needed to finish one routine before she could begin the next, and thus, responding on the fly to new objectives remained impossible.

Only through luck had she been along for the ride across the battlefield. She had been in the middle of circling around her inamorato’s tail, favoring going over the tip of it with a pirouette into a somersault when it had clipped her and carried her with it. [Graceful Recovery] had allowed her to improvise a way to continue the dance up the tail while airborne, somehow defying gravity and momentum while still sticking the landing.

Now, she found herself on her inamorato’s rump while some other dragon appeared across from her. Sweat beaded on her brow at the prospect of tangoing with it, but she could not disgrace herself and the people of Tarr by fleeing.

“This was supposed to be an easy gig, a simple life of luxury in service to a dragon with the occasional small fight every now and then. Why the fuck am I fighting for my life against godsdamned dragons bigger than my inamorato?”

The enemy dragon roared in protest against the spike that had embedded itself in his shoulder. Quickly finding a dance routine that would see her dismount and get out of harm’s way, It-Has-Pockets rushed to finish her current routine before she ended up squished between the two dragons that dwarfed her in size. By a narrow margin, she cleared away from the collision that saw the red dragon sent sailing with a tomoe nage. Or, in simple words, the gold dragon rolled onto his back and used his legs to fling the red dragon up and over, the latter of which crashed hard into the earth while the former quickly righted himself afterwards.

As she spun away from the action, two things of note caught her attention. The first was to be found on the horizon. Though distant and small, fliers could be seen heading to the rescue from the direction of camp. The second and more immediately concerning was the looming dozen or so dragon hunters that made their way to her. A few of the closer ones leered with undisguised lust, and both disgusted and adverse to the prospect of sating their carnal desires, she changed into a sprinting and leaping routine that would see her move closer to the two dragons. Like it or not, the safest place to be would be in the middle of two dragons duking it out, for while she could take on Platinum Adventurers onesie-twosie, a dozen at once with her as the only target was suicide. With much to live for, she retreated into the ‘safety’ of the draconic brawl.