[System]: Alert, your battery is low, please close the main menu to charge your device. [10%]

“What did I do to deserve this?”

Good question. Goddamn shame I knew the answer.

Like, really. I ought to have known better. Lydia did tell me this was a poor pick for a beginner, and she was right! Of course raw strength, speed, or whatever other bullshit overpowered options would have been an easier choice. Of course I was going to be hella vulnerable in the early game. Of course listening to the expertise of someone who helps people like me for a living was probably a good choice, but I uhh… ok fine, I screwed up.

I held my face in my hands. “God damn it.” I whispered.

Why did it always end like this?

Every time I would do something. Every damn time. Future me looks back, shakes his head…

I didn’t cry. Not exactly. This was hardly the first I’ve felt this way, after all. Bullies at school, parents at home, trolls and hackers and god knows who else online. It was all the same, in the end. No matter where I was… no matter what I did. After a certain time, past a certain point, there were no tears left to cry.

I sat back, staring forwards listlessly. Even after death…

I looked at my hands. Still clean and puffy, despite everything. Not the hands of someone who’s done anything, earned anything. Not the hands of someone who…

Fuck. Fuck this. Fuck everything!

I left the ground. My eyes blazed. “You know what, fuck it!” I snarled, my voice a low growl. Fine, fine! I messed up, I’ll die, again. Something will happen, I don’t know what. But I won’t be going down without a fight.

I breathed in, and my back straightened. I assessed the situation again, this time, my eyes regaining some focus. I looked at the lion again, my eyes clear.

He was pouncing, heading clearly for one direction. Ok. That was something. He was swiping to the left, at my throat. I could roll. I eyed the battery. 9%. I took a breath. Then I swiped.

As the lion swiped overhead, I rolled for dear life. A claw raked down my back, and I gritted my teeth. Hot blood splattered to the ground beneath me. The lion turned around, snarling, and I got a full view of it’s teeth again. I gulped. That attack was fast. Too fast. If I missed things by a second…

[System]: Health: 42/100; Status Effect: Bleed (-1 HP every cycle until staunched)

It pounced again. I quickly swiped. The lion froze in the air, and I glanced around. Heading to the right.

Then I swiped, and dodged to the left. The lion lunged. I didn’t manage a full evasion this time. A sharp claw raked the sides of my ears, drawing a yelp of pain. I fell to the ground with a oof as the air left my lungs. I was too elated to be angry though. Hurt or not, I was alive.

“Hell yeah!”

Confused and murderous, the lion turned around. But I paused. I saw the tensing of its muscles, I saw the direction that pounce was headed. I saw the lion fly, millisecond after millisecond, towards my throat. It was like one of those red arrows showing where the boss’ attack was going to land. I took a breath. I needed to time this just right. Gathering my courage, I prepared my muscles. And then I swiped.

I evaded once more. This time the lion passed by harmlessly.

“What’s wrong? Can’t catch me?” I ducked under a swipe. Evaded a bite, and then a pounce.

I grinned.

I could do this all day.

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Then my eyes caught the battery again. 7%. Right. It almost made me miss my dodge. Almost. I yelped as a claw scraped across my face.

HP:41/100

Another deep breath. But this time, I moved forwards. Ducking under a swipe, I winded up my fist, and then paused again. I saw the lion’s tense muscles, his murderous stare. I saw the swipe of his paws, and his precariously balanced one leg.

Then I smiled.

Crunch! My fist connected square with the lion’s jaw. There was a crack, a soft tearing sound, and then… blood.

HP: 39/100

“Ow!” I yelped, drawing back as my bloodied fist screamed in pain. Turns out punching something more than twice your weight wasn’t going to do much. Who’d have guessed. At least it must’ve looked cool though.

HP: 35/100

Unfortunately, it just made the lion more angry. And this time, it caught me off guard.

“Aaah!” I screamed as the lion pounced, pinning me down on the arena floor.

Then he bit down. My pause came just half a second too late.

Crunch.

“Oh… f*ck!” I screamed.

The pain had stopped. Suddenly, completely, it just vanished. I felt nothing during the pause. Not even the crunching of my bones.

But then, at that point, the pain was the least of my problems. I cursed. The hell was I meant to do without my leg? But could I save it, from a lion? Even as it bit down? Yeah… probably not. S*it.

Well… what then? Did I… just end up losing?

I checked my battery, then my stats. I gulped at each.

3%

23/100 (Bleedx3, lose 3 HP per cycle unless staunched)

Was it… over?

I took in a breath. Well, whether it was or wasn’t… I needed to try! Taking another breath, I swiped again.

The pain hit me all once. The crunch, the splitting, the breaking of bone. Then the teeth, digging down and through bone and flesh. I couldn’t move, couldn’t struggle, couldn’t even breathe. Nothing but scream, and wait.

Wait for my leg to get bitten off.

Except well… it didn’t happen. I heard a gurgle. The lion’s eyes widened, and it thrashed, weaved, choked, but my leg was still there.

I yelped as I was raised into the air.

20/100.

Crash! Face first into the pit.

16/100.

“Ow! Ow! Stop!”

The lion stopped. One last desperate, mighty bite later, it crashed to the ground, apparently lifeless. Gritting my teeth, I extracted my leg. My hands shook as I did. What sort of mangled mess would I be looking at?

6/100 (bleed*10, lose 10 HP per cycle unless staunched)

My eyes widened as my leg returned to view. “Huh?”

By all appearances, it was perfectly unharmed.

“Wait a hot minute-” My hands drifted to the place where the toothmarks should’ve been. Nothing. Then to the place where I swore I heard bones snap. Nothing. Then I patted myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming.

“How in the world?” I gasped.

Was it… the healthbar? Did that mean I wouldn’t actually take any damage until it went to 0? I scratched my head, baffled. So I guess this was like Minecraft? Only heart that mattered was your last half? Well, I guess I couldn’t complain about that, but still. Who designed this?

I looked around me. The colosseum was quiet now, dead silent save for the occasional snarl of a lion, and all eyes were on me. What did the citizens of Rome see, in that moment? I suppose it didn’t matter, the results were the same. I’d downed a lion with my bare hands, and emerged standing.

For a moment, my roar was just as loud as any lion’s, and prouder. “Hell yeah!” My fist rose into the air.

The leg was still bleeding, as was everywhere else. No doubt I would be dead soon, but man… that was a way to go out. Worth it.

Or so I thought, until my HP reached -4.

Nothing could’ve prepared me for the pain. First came my bones. They just… shattered. I felt it happen, tendons and ligaments being pried apart as flesh ripped and bone fragments flew out. I snapped to the ground, my arms twisted at an awkward angle, my ribs burning. Then a crack, and then I could feel nothing else. The rest of my body suddenly lost feeling. I couldn’t move my arms, my legs, my neck… or feel anything.

Maybe that was for the better. Through my bloody, tear soaked eyes I saw my leg fly off, crunched into pieces. Bite marks marred every inch. A lion’s bite.

Of course.

It hit me all at once. Of course. HP, it was like a shield. I wouldn’t actually get hurt. Only take damage. No wonder my legs weren’t broken by that fall. Huh… how had I not noticed?

Idiot.

Well, too late now. Not even god could…

[System]: Enemy {Lion} slain! +500XP

[System]: Level up to level 2!

[System]: Level up to level 3!

[System]: Level up to level 4!

[System]: Level up to level 5!

Special reward unlocked!

As if that would help. I laughed.

Wait… what?

I blinked. Why didn’t I feel… dead?

[System]: Your stats have been updated!

Stats:

Str:11 [+1]

Int:11 [+1]

Dex:11 [+1]

Char:6 [+1]

Lck: {Nan}

But most importantly:

HP: 110/110

As I watched, I healed. Bone fragments flew back into my leg. Skin knit together. Torn flesh just grew back. Somehow, some way, as of by magic… I was back at full HP. As if I’ve never taken a hit.

The lions stared at me, all six of them, and I felt a smile creep back to my face.

I begun rubbing my hands. “Ready for round 2?”

Then the notice hit me.

[System]: Battery critically low. (1%). Please recharge now or you must wait {24 hours} for a recharge.

Uh oh.