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Not My First (Space?) Rodeo [A Sci-Fi Action LitRPG] (Book 2-5)
2.49 - Shooting Fish In a Barrel and Other Bad Ideas

2.49 - Shooting Fish In a Barrel and Other Bad Ideas

Veda and Mama Grace smiled across the empty plate of food on Veda's desk. "I think we're ready to make one last call, don't you?" Veda said.

Grace rubbed her hands together as she leaned back into her chair. "I think so. Act fast, we've got a long way to go. I've got to get to work cooking up a victory feast, although I expect they'll be long done before I get back down there." She gave a hesitant sigh. "You'll forgive me if I stay for this one. I really need to see the looks on their faces.”

“I’m going to have my algorithms hide you," Veda said. "Just keep this between us sponsors. Nice and clean."

"Fine by me," Grace said as Veda had her systems handle the call.

The Patriarch of the Church of the Progenitors picked up himself, not making Veda go through underlings. "What can I do for you, Lady Tvedra?"

"I would like you to arbitrate a phone call between myself, the head of Proxima, and the head of Alabaster Sky," she said without preamble. "I think you will find this call most instructive."

The patriarch raised an eyebrow. "Indeed. As it happens, I have a small amount of time. I am eagerly anticipating hearing the results of your team's actions, Tvedra."

"They'll let me know as soon as they're done," she said. She was certain the patriarch knew exactly what was going on down in Threshold, but she wasn't going to press him to see if he had thoughts.

“One moment.” The patriarch looked away, then back. "It seems that both representatives have time for us now. I'll put us all in together, shall I?" A moment later, the holographic heads of both Proxima and Alabaster Sky appeared in the air before Veda.

It was the same woman she had spoken to a few hours ago, Lakhnar, and the familiar Proxima representative, Halithi Dreamwarden, who looked as grumpy as usual. "What's the meaning of this?" Dreamwarden asked. "Have you called to ask our help? We're not interested."

"I told you that offer expired as soon as we got off our call," Lakhnar said.

Veda held up a hand. "I am here with an ultimatum for you both," she said. That got their attention.

Dreamwarden said, "What do you mean, 'ultimatum'?" as Lakhnar said, "You are in no position to be giving us ultimatums."

"This is on behalf of the Union of Earth Miners," Veda said. "They've asked me to present it to you, as I am sponsor of the preeminent human mining team in this exploit."

"Human?" Lakhnar's eyebrows raised even higher.

Veda clarified. “The Earthlings. They refer to themselves as 'human,' since that is their species, and they don't really realize that it's not a unique designator.”

"Oh, the indigenous." Dreamwarden smirked and tossed his hair. "Go ahead. Several of them have decided to present us demands, have they? This should be good."

Veda looked at the declaration Mama Grace had brought to her. She cleared her throat. "On behalf of the Union of Human Miners, I present this. We state we will be performing no services to any corporation, conglomeration, team, or individual who violates the following.

“First, any contract involving Earth humans may be renegotiated or sold at the behest of the Earth human involved."

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"Current sponsor will sell the contract for a price of twice what was originally negotiated."

"What?" Dreamwarden demanded.

"They want to be able to buy out of contracts,” Veda said. “To get rid of exploitive backers, or maybe to join up with other earthlings, doesn’t matter. They're offering to pay back double what their backers paid. You’ll keep whatever you've earned off of the humans, but they want to be able to buy out.”

"That's preposterous," Lakhnar said. "What else?"

"Second, when Phase Three begins, all farming level claims by Earth humans will be respected. Any outside farm miners who join at that point will need to stake their own claims or make a bargain with the humans who already hold that level."

"That's a matter for the System, not us," the Proxima rep said.

Veda smiled. "Yes, well, I'm sure they've heard stories of all of the ways you get around System restrictions."

"Is that it?"

"One more thing." Veda was truly enjoying herself. Right now, the representatives had no intention of accepting any of these terms, so they were listening with amusement. That would change soon enough. "During Phase Three, should any human outpost or team be present in Phase Three, you will agree not to interfere. There will be no assassination attempts on the human miners. There will be no attempts to take their base. If, during the usual flow of gameplay, your miners and their miners come up against each other, then let nature take its course. But no direct interference. You will respect the territory claimed by indigenous human miners."

Dreamwarden snorted. "All right, then. I take it that's the end?" he said as Veda trailed off. "You can tell them."

"Wait," Veda said, holding up a hand. "Any party who does not agree to these claims will not receive any goods and services from any human signatory to this agreement. They will not sell you gear. They will not sell you materials. They will not sell you information. They will not work for you in any format."

"Yes, yes," Dreamwarden looked bored. "Very well. We'll have to make do without—

“The undersigned include the names of over 4 million human miners. More are signing every hour," Veda said. "Gentlemen, they have 70% of all human crafters agree to this already. They have 50% of the miners, and that number is going up with every shift change. You won't be able to buy raw materials. You won't be able to buy the refined goods you need for Phase Three. May I remind you, there will be severely limited supplies and personnel coming in from outside, especially now that your governments are cutting this exploit short to prepare for the rogue world. I'm transmitting over the agreement along with all the signatures now."

"We'll — we'll send in..."

“You’ll do what?" Veda asked. "The system will enforce no miner versus miner violence here or in Threshold. Inside the Reality Engine levels, they've got the advantage." She smiled. "I'll let you examine the deal, but I'm afraid they have you..." She checked. "The human phrase is 'over a barrel.'"

Mama Grace was giggling quietly in her chair. Veda showed her a quick smile. This was going to be worth it.

"Tvedra, this will reflect poorly on your requests for involvement in future exploits." Dreamwarden warned. “The three interstellars — Proxima, Alabaster Sky, and ConSweGo — control most exploits in this section of the galaxy. Are you sure you want to get on our bad side?”

Veda smiled. "Actually," she said, "I've already spoken with ConSweGo. They agreed to all terms and have added an endorsement to my license saying that I am welcome to put in a bid on any Reality Engine exploit that they sponsor in the next ten cycles." She was especially proud of that. Mama Grace had wanted to call up all three major conglomerates at once, but Veda had persuaded her to approach ConSweGo first. They had negotiated a 10% discount on all services provided by the Earthlings for any ConSweGo-affiliated miner as a way to sweeten the deal.

"ConSweGo signed?" Lakhnar asked.

"Feel free to ask them," Veda said sweetly. "Or check with the system. The contract should be registered by now."

Now she had them. If their chief rival had already agreed to these terms, then they had no choice. They would sign, or they would sit the rest of this exploit out. Lakhnar huffed. "We'll see about that," she said. She turned away.

She had silenced her audio, but Veda could still see her face as her expression changed from anger to dismay to horror. "I'm afraid I was telling the truth," Veda said.

Dreamwarden’s shoulders slumped. Then he shook his head and laughed. "You win this one, Tvedra," he said. "You're looking to be a sharper dealer than we ever expected. Proxima will sign.”