There was a cavern ahead with eleven gnoblins and they ranged from level seven to level ten. Terra had gotten her Identify and Bait skills up enough that she made a great scout. This was our first crowd. I gave Terra a mental nod. She might not have Donut’s magic missile to help with damage, but if she got overwhelmed, I could pull her out of the line of fire with the summoning spell I had for her.
“Incoming,” Terra told me through our mental link. “I’ve got three of them, I think. These have swords.”
Terra was fast. The cave path narrowed at the point that I waited. Even if she pulled all of them, they couldn’t attack more than two at a time. I braced for the first one to come around the corner as Terra darted between my legs.
The thing about swords was that they were useless once you got really close. Back when Beau had been running his LARPs, I’d tried to get into boffering, but they wouldn’t let me fight the way I wanted to fight. It was against the rules to get inside their weapon reach for grappling. I’d known my method would work, but they wouldn’t even let me try it. What I liked about the dungeons was that no one was around to nerf my fighting style.
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 168/168)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 208/208)
Sure enough, the first two gnoblins had rusty swords. I deflected the sword off my left bracer and used its momentum to spin into my deadly embrace. The guard that I was fighting had a nice leather overtunic that I wanted intact, so instead of stabbing into his stomach area, I stabbed up into its armpit. I spun us so that his partner would have to hit his buddy if he wanted to take a swing at me. It was a method that had been working for me.
The patrol gnoblin didn’t seem to care about hitting his buddy. Either that or he couldn’t stop the swing he’d aimed at me, even after I’d turned his buddy between us. The sword’s strike sliced through the back of the leather tunic making me wince. I wanted that leather tunic.
Health -4 (842/846)
You have grappled a Gnoblin Guard.
Grapple +1
Dodge +1
Exp +20 (1740/2700)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 142/168)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 208/208)
I worried a bit that I couldn’t see the gnoblin behind my current foes, but my mind was more focused on the ones I could reach. The gnoblin guard was bleeding enough that I knew I’d hit a major artery. He was dead, but it would take a little time for him to bleed out. In the meantime, I held him with my dagger-wielding hand and cast a Sparkler at the gnoblin behind him with my left hand. As long as I was squeezing the gnoblin guard, he couldn’t do much more than claw at my back, which almost tickled. I had learned to tuck my head under his doggy chin to stop the biting. If I pushed my head up, it pushed his head back and allowed me to watch the gnoblin patrol right behind him. While my current dance partner would bleed out within five minutes or so, he wouldn’t even feel dizzy for another two minutes and that was a long time when in the middle of a fight.
Health -7 (835/846)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 122/168)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 200/208)
Oh, good. It had been a good cut into a major artery and would drain out twenty health every round. Meanwhile my Sparkler had done eight whole damage to the patrol gnoblin. I couldn’t wait for that Sparkler to level up. Once it got to forty, it would turn into Flare which would do almost double that. Unless I wanted to drop my dagger, I’d have to be content with the single Sparkler until the guard died.
The guard managed to scrape his teeth over my head, but he was pretty much only stuck with a mouthful of hair. I wasn’t the kind of girl who cared if my hair got messed up. I’d learned in my previous incarnation that the Beauty stat was totally different than other stats. It had a base of ten, and if you got messy or disheveled, it went down. It only went over ten when you had the beauty accoutrements. You know, like a fancy dress, a shiny barrette, spiffy boots, and make up. It did affect a person’s ability to charm, but it wasn’t something I cared about much, especially in the middle of a dungeon crawl. After all, I had plenty of dance partners down here in the caves.
“That was terrible,” Terra rolled her mental eyes at my thoughts.
I just snickered and cast Sparkler again.
Health -4 (831/846)
Sparkler +1
Identify +1
Exp +20 (1760/2700)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 100/168) – condition Bleeding (-20 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 191/208)
Finally, I felt Identify break the threshold at twenty skill points. It would now give me more information. If I’d only caused a minor bleed effect, the guard would only be losing ten health per round. Terra was throwing a scratch in here and there, but I was just waiting and blocking at this point. It was reasonable, I supposed. I hadn’t really been fighting all that much. My skills were abysmal by my standards. All I could do was dink them to death until I levelled everything up. They were also managing dinky attacks, but my health pool was drastically higher, so I was always going to win a dink war. I added a toe stomp to my attacks, but it wouldn’t do much more than Terra’s swipes.
Health -3 (828/846)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 76/168) – condition Bleeding (-20 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 183/208)
The guard chose then to tilt back his head and howl, sending out the alarm. It wouldn’t do him any good, as he’d be dead in fifteen seconds, but it did cause me a bit of trouble. I thought about how that third gnoblin behind these two wasn’t able to get to me and felt secure in that way, but I wouldn’t be able to rest and heal. I did some quick math in my head while biting down on the gnoblin guard’s stretched neck. My dance partner’s howling alarm gargled to a stop. If I lost a pessimistic forty health per gnoblin I killed and there were eleven of them, then I’d still only be down about half my health by the time I was done killing them all. That relaxed me, so I kept up my pattern.
Health -6 (822/846)
Intelligence +1
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 52/168) – condition Bleeding (-20 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 174/208)
I cast a heal on myself and checked Terra’s health. It was just a matter of waiting for my partner to die and then changing partners. I might as well get my heal up since my biting attack didn’t do enough damage to justify the bad taste it left in my mouth, literally. It was worse than taking your cousin with bad breath to the prom because your mom owed her sister a favor. Skills and spell levels went up faster when applied during combat. At least it seemed that way.
Health -4 (818/846)
You have healed for +3 Health (821/846)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 32/168) – condition Bleeding (-20 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 174/208)
Okay that was super boring. It was time to see what a newer spell could do. I had to focus for this one since it was still really low. I cast Mild Poison at the patrol gnoblin and whatever else was behind it. My concentration allowed my current dance partner to get a bite in on my shoulder, but my new shoulder pads made it so that I didn’t even notice. What I wouldn’t do for a breath mint though.
Health -9 (812/846)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 11/168) – condition Bleeding (-20 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 183/208)
There was something about the poison spell that made me want to hold it like I had against Beau. So, I held and the mana spread out before me like a wave of something that didn’t follow any rules of physics. My cloud of greying mana expanded through walls and around corners with no notice for the obstacles. It felt good to be at one with the mana. So good that I might not have stopped if the guard hadn’t collapsed in my arms.
Health -5 (807/846)
You have killed a Gnoblin Guard – Exp +168 (1828/2700)
Mild Poison +1
Exp +10 (1838/2700)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 173/208) – condition Poisoned (-10 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 160/168) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
I almost didn’t dodge the sword coming at me as I snapped out of the haze that casting Mild Poison had done. As it was, I ended up ducking the second one and grabbing at another guard instead of the patrol who had been waiting so patiently for my dance card to be free. I missed my grapple, but I got a good swipe at its sword arm. It yelped and dropped its sword using its other paw to cover its bleeding wrist. The gnoblin patrol took a full swing at me and only managed to get his new buddy. It hadn’t helped him that Terra had wound herself under his feet. I worried only until she giggled.
“Dogs are so easy,” Terra scoffed. She was so fast that she was almost a blur as she ducked back behind me. It was a testament to her dexterity that she only tripped him and not me. Then again, she and I had been playing the weave through my legs game for a while. That’s why my dexterity was high enough to sidestep the patrol’s growling snap at my face and backbend back from the guard’s similar attack. I didn’t manage to avoid all the damage, but they barely nicked me.
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Health -7 (800/846)
Dodge +1
Exp +10 (1848/2700)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 173/208) – condition Poisoned (-10 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 160/168) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
“Don’t worry, you’re next,” I told the guard as I grappled the gnoblin patrol and the new guard had a chance to try to get me through his brother-in-arms. “Everyone will get a turn.”
I wasn’t sure that they didn’t understand me somehow. I thought I’d just been amusing myself and Terra, but the guard got a very confused look on his face. The patrol gnoblin in my arms didn’t have a chest piece, so I was able to plunge my dagger deep in my first real attack.
Health -2 (798/846)
Piercing +1
Exp +10 (1858/2700)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 143/208) – condition Poisoned and Bleeding (-20 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 152/168) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
The patrol felt almost like the fight had gone out of him. Either that or he was too stunned to fight back this round. I tore my dagger up, gutting him as easily as I’d done the pups. Meanwhile, the new guard poked his dagger at the hand that I’d wrapped around the patrol gnoblin. I used my strength and dexterity to shift the patrol’s weight in my arms and the guard’s dagger plunged into the patrol’s back. The guard’s eyes widened in shock and fear. I could only laugh. I wished those boffer judges could see me now. I knew my way would work.
Strength +1
Grapple +1
Exp +10 (1868/2700)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 98/208) – condition Poisoned and Bleeding (-30 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 144/168) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
I was laughing so hard that I nearly stumbled over the body on the floor. I thought loot at it to get it out of my way. The guard had found his anger and lunged for me. Looting had lost me my second attack, but I wasn’t worried about it. The guard stabbed his buddy in the back again. I wondered if maybe he was doing as much damage as I was. Not quite, but it sure helped. I could use more of these stupid guards.
Health -2 (796/846)
Dodge +1
Exp +10 (1878/2700)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 58/208) – condition Poisoned and Bleeding (-30 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 136/168) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
I was going start casting Sparkler at the guard, but my mana still seemed to be feeding the poison, which I could tell was still spreading. I’d managed to cast two Sparklers at once before, but I’d never thought of having to cast two different spells at the same time. I wasn’t going to be casting anything as long as the poison was spreading out. While I could see the cloud of sickly mana, I didn’t think others could. Beau hadn’t seen it. He’d barely been able to counter it with a healing song. The gnoblin guard didn’t stab his friend this time, but he did seem to be feeling more than just the health reduction of the poison. I jerked my dagger sideways, shredding the patrol’s insides.
Health -1 (795/846)
Mild Poison +1
Exp +10 (1888/2700)
Gnoblin Patrol – Level 8 (Health 13/208) – condition Poisoned and Dying (-30 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 128/168) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
I pulled out my dagger as the gnoblin in my arms died, looting it as it fell so that I wouldn’t have to trip over it later. The guard gave the most baffled look at the falling and then disappearing comrade. I forced myself to focus on the gnoblin pushing past the guard. After all, I wasn’t sure I wanted to kill this guard yet. He’d been so helpful so far. This new one looked a little more bossy. He shoved the guard to the side and dove at me.
“Ole!” I shouted, giving a really good impression of a bullfighter and punching my dagger down into his back as he passed. This left me with a dilemma though. Now I had an enemy behind me and another one pushing past the stupidly stunned guard, and they both looked smart enough to not stab each other for me.
Health -1 (794/846)
You have killed a Gnoblin Patrol – Exp +208 (2036/2700)
Mild Poison +1
Piercing +1
Exp +20 (2056/2700)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 112/168) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Tanner – Level 9 (Health 236/252) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Smith – Level 10 (Health 284/300) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
It was time to channel some self-defense classes. What? They offered them free on campus and a girl’s got to learn how to defend... Yeah, okay, that’s not why I took them. It was the first time I’d gone to college and the guy who ran the classes was cute. I mostly played dumb, so he’d let me flip him over and over again. We never dated, but it was fun.
I charged the gnoblin smith that was behind me. I saw a look of surprise on his face as I aimed my shoulder at his solar plexus and rushed him like he was the quarterback. The tanner hadn’t had a chance to get close enough to take a swipe at my back and the guard was still standing there in a dumbfounded haze. The smith held a hammer, whose head was bigger than mine, and he was strong. He was so strong that I damaged myself more than him as my head and shoulder hit him just below a large set of metal shoulder pads that reached down almost to his stomach.
The problem with a guy like this was that all that muscle was on top. I not only had enough strength to knock him back a few feet, I also had enough leverage that I could lever him up onto my shoulder in a fireman’s carry. I’m sure my grappling skill and dexterity helped to pull it off, but leverage is my friend, so I give it the most credit. The smith flailed, but they were all surprised enough that they stared goggle-eyed as I turned him around and ran at the tanner, screaming like a Valkyrie! I bowled the tanner over and back into a crowd of waiting gnoblins behind them and then backed past the guard to put that choke point back where it belonged. I think I did more damage to myself than them.
Health -12 (782/846)
Skill Learned: Manic Charge
Exp +20 (2076/2700)
Strength +1
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 104/168) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Tanner – Level 9 (Health 224/252) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Smith – Level 10 (Health 266/300) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
“Ewwww!!” Terra complained. I knew what she complained about as I was trying very hard not to slip in the leftovers of the smith’s recent meal that had been deposited behind me during the charge.
In his defense, the smith had been poisoned and hit in the stomach with what could be compared to a linebacker’s strength. The smith and tanner took long enough to scramble up off the ground for me to cast the clean behind me. The last thing I needed was to slip and fall in it with nine gnoblins still waiting to mob me. The tanner pushed the gaping guard behind him with a growl worthy of a little dog. I always found that little dogs were far more vicious than their larger counterparts, so that was a compliment for me.
Clean +1
Exp +10 (2086/2700)
Gnoblin Guard – Level 7 (Health 96/168) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Tanner – Level 9 (Health 228/252) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Smith – Level 10 (Health 276/300) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
The smith tried to charge me again, but I took the charge rather than let him get behind me. I dodged the stupid hammer so easily it was pitiful. That thing was supposed to be used on an anvil, not a person. I ducked down as the hammer swung over my head, but instead of letting him rush by, I put my shoulder into ribs and added my push into the smith’s hammer’s heavy momentum and managed to slam him into the wall.
I barely saw the tanner draw back his hand and it didn’t connect with my mind that he had some type of distance attack until it hit my shoulder. The whipcrack near my ear caused me to flinch from the sound even though it only landed on my leather shoulder pads. Now this was just cheating, I thought with a shudder. I’d give him that shot, but my eyes steeled over knowing I wouldn’t let him do it again.
Strength +1
Gnoblin Tanner – Level 9 (Health 220/252) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Smith – Level 10 (Health 248/300) – condition Poisoned and Critically Wounded (-28 health/5 seconds)
Now that I knew how easy it was to duck the stupid hammer, I kicked out at the smith just to keep him against the wall. Instead, I focused on the tanner. Now look, there’s just something about whips that makes me change inside. It didn’t matter that the whip wasn’t going to do as much as the hammer if it hit me. I’m not going to say much more than that except that I was determined to make sure the tanner died next.
I watched for him to pull back his arm again and flipped my dagger from my right to my left hand. As he threw his arm forward in terrible form, I raised my right bracer to intercept. I grabbed the end of the whip as its end wrapped harmlessly around my bracer. With a flick that surprised the tanner much more than me, the whip flew out of his paw/hand and I heard the handle clatter against the ground.
“We did not discuss a safe word,” I grit out, flinging the whip behind me.
Health -4 (778/846)
Skill Learned: Disarm
Exp +20 (2106/2700)
Dexterity +1
Gnoblin Tanner – Level 9 (Health 212/252) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Smith – Level 10 (Health 220/300) – condition Poisoned and Critically Wounded (-28 health/5 seconds)
The smith came at me with a mighty swing of that totally overweighted hammerhead. I threw him at the other wall the same way I’d thrown him at the one he’d pushed off, tossing another punch of my dagger toward his leg. With my right hand, I snapped a Sparkler at the disarmed tanner, who was fumbling to pull out a dagger.
Piercing +1
Knife Fighting +1
Exp +20 (2126/2700)
Gnoblin Tanner – Level 9 (Health 196/252) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Smith – Level 10 (Health 192/300) – condition Poisoned and Critically Wounded (-28 health/5 seconds)
It was a new kind of dance and one that actually kept me out of harm’s way even better. As the blacksmith pushed off toward me again, I lunged back the other way and punctured his other lung. I fired another Sparkler over the blacksmith’s shoulder at the tanner. It felt more like aerobics than dancing, a thought that made me smirk.
Sparkler +1
Exp +10 (2126/2700)
Dexterity +1
Gnoblin Tanner – Level 9 (Health 179/252) – condition Poisoned (-8 health/5 seconds)
Gnoblin Smith – Level 10 (Health 151/300) – condition Poisoned and Dying (-38 health/5 seconds)
The smith was now struggling to even take a breath. I might have felt sorry for him if he hadn’t been trying so hard to hurt me with his last ounce of strength. He staggered at me, the hammer swinging low and weak. I kicked down to knock the hammer out of his hand. He not only dropped the hammer, but he also tumbled down after it, gasping at my feet as not only the tanner, but also a new gnoblin formed up behind him.
My mind couldn’t do the math anymore. I didn’t count how many were left. The smith and tanner had been the highest levels of them all, and they’d turned out to be the easiest. The adrenaline of fighting pushed all the blood from my brain and into the extremities of my body. I let my body take over and continue to kill one gnoblin after another. The end of it found me slumped against the wall, covered in gnoblin blood, panting. It also upped my level and many stats.
This dungeon diving had turned out to be a very good idea. I was working out my fury and frustration as much as it was helping me gain levels. I also had some very good loot. I now wore a full set of leather armor, including a little cap that annoyed me. I felt like I looked stupid but the pathetic attacks of these gnoblins did almost no damage anymore.
Name: Karma
Class: Mage-ish
Level: 7 (1211/4050)
Profession: Cook (Level 5: 330/1800), Storyteller (Level 3: 20/800), Singer (Level 2: 450/500), Carpenter (Level 1: 50/300), Seamstress (Level 1: 20/300)
Health: 1007/1007
Mana: 931/931
Intelligence: 25
Will: 24
Strength: 26
Constitution: 27
Charm: 22
Beauty: 6
Perception: 27
Dexterity: 33
Luck: 26
Skills: Knife Fighting (38), Dodge (30), Cooking (26), Identify (26), Meditation (24), Storytelling (20), Dual Wielding (18), Piercing (18), Singing (15), Alcohol Tolerance (12), Multiple Foe Combat (12), Bartering (10), Intimidation (10), Grapple (8), Comedy (7), Kick (7), Woodworking (7), Dancing (6), Unarmed Combat (4), Sewing (3), Sneak (3), Disarm (2), Manic Charge (1)
Spells: Flare (41), Clean (35), Heal (20), Basic Repair (19), Freshen (14), Casting Stone (10), Basic Buff (9), Cure Poison (7), Mild Poison (7), Soft Breeze (6), Moisten (5), Lift Spirits (4), Summon Witch’s Familiar (3)
Recipes: Fruit Pie (9), Sourdough Bread (6), Stew (6), Chili (3), Cornbread (3), Meat Pie (3), Porridge (3), Buffalo Sauce (2), Chicken Coop (2), Cobbler (2), Mint Sauce (2)
The most important part was that Sparkler had upgraded to Flare, which now did an average of fifteen points of damage per cast. The mana cost was higher too, but it didn’t even put a dent in my mana. Heal had gone up too. The latter had increased while I sat and healed myself up three health points at a time for over two hundred health that I’d lost in the fighting. It now healed eight to nine health per cast.