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B3-SIXTY-ONE: Talons Out

With Fursona in the fight, I found myself full of energy. I’d been playing defense against the hulking First V since he’d shrugged off my best attacks, but now? Now, I had a real chance of meaningful damage.

Unfortunately, I was stuck in Copy Cat, and my best powers were down. But I could still chip away at him. I threw myself back into the fight, claws lashing out as [Hometown Heroine] activated, giving me a little more speed. I scratched across the big man’s back, then kicked off, driving my claws into his shoulders as he whirled to face me.

[Badass Damage! +1 Badass Point]

“Did you beat the other one?” I yelled between Fursona screeches. Her wings beat, pushing the One V away from me for a moment and allowing me to catch just a little more of my breath, though my throat still burned from his grip.

“Yeah, easy! Once I got her off balance, she went right down! Almost too easy!”

“Okay, let’s take this guy down!” I used [Leaping Leopards] and sprung through the air. The First V was ready for it, though, and a meaty fist hit my side just as my claws lashed out against his neck, leaving thin red lines that blossomed into bloody cuts. I bounced off a tree, rolled on the grass, and sprang back to my feet, dusting off my Costume.

[HP 5/13]

[Badass Move! +1 Badass Point]

Then, before I could react, the First V moved toward me. He lashed out with his fists and feet while I retaliated with scratches, looking for an opening. Blows rained down on me, and I kicked out at the big guy’s leg, but he backpedaled somehow.

[Badass Damage! +1 Badass Point]

[Tough Kitty! +1 Grit Point]

[Tough Kitty! +1 Grit Point]

[HP 4/13]

[Badass Damage! +1 Badass Point]

As we swung back and forth, my head grew clearer and clearer, and suddenly, I realized something. I’d fought this villain before—and not once, but a couple of times. He moved like Jungle Jim, took hits like Brick House, and even had the same physique; the only thing missing was his age. The First V was clearly younger and maybe a touch faster.

But if he was a younger version of Brick House, that meant he’d make more mistakes than the real deal would. His massive, meaty fist swung toward me, and I ducked. An oak tree’s bark exploded behind me, and I took advantage of his stunned expression to roll to the side—just as Fursona screeched at him.

[Good Thinking! +1 Cunning Point]

The constant attacks were starting to wear down the First V; the next time he went for my throat, I danced back, and he stumbled. That was all I needed; I lashed out and shoved with all my might, then pounced on the villain the moment he hit the ground. His massive fists lashed out at me, but Fursona hit the back of his head, and after another vicious exchange of blows, he went limp.

The fur and feathers settled, and I picked myself up, then helped Fursona off the First V’s chest. She brushed herself off. “Holy crap, they made him tough!”

“Yeah, he’s almost a carbon copy of Jungle Jim.” I explained what I’d seen fighting both of them up close, then switched to Rainy Day, used [Virga] at a safe distance from the unconscious villain, and rotated slowly to Understudy.

[Medic! +2 Cunning Points]

[HP 6/13]

[Rejuvenation Active: HP 11/13]

“Okay. That’s two Vs down. Do you think they full-committed to this? All three Vs?” I asked Fursona as we took to the air.

She nodded. “Probably. We still don’t know how they got McHammer and Lord Destructo involved, either.”

“Lucky coincidence, maybe?” I glanced toward the Student Union Building, where the sounds of heavy fighting echoed over a wailing alarm. Judging from the volume and the eight Mindstorms hovering over the building, that wasn’t our show. “I’m curious if the One L is on campus today.”

“Sure is,” a man’s voice behind me said, and I whirled around, expecting to see a power armor-clad villain walking toward me.

Instead, I saw a woman in an 3V1L mask topped by the most enormous bun of platinum blonde hair I’d ever seen and a man with a staff with a pentagon on its tip. I groaned. “Okay, which one of you is the V?”

“Both of us,” the woman sneered, undoing her scrunchie. “I’m the Third V.”

“And I’m the Second,” the man said, “at least for the moment.”

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“Until you get replaced?” Fursona asked. “What kind of life is that? And didn’t we just fight the Second V?”

The woman’s hair fell free, draping down until it hit the floor and pooled around her like that one cartoon princess. She snapped her fingers, and it separated into three sections, each braiding itself into thick ropes of hair. “It’s the best life I’ve ever had! I get to be the Third V today, and in a couple of weeks, I’ll be the Second or First when it’s my turn again.”

I couldn’t remember any villains with crazy hair in the few articles we’d read, and we definitely hadn’t fought a V with that power. Her braids snaked around, whipping like black snakes as she walked toward me, and I fired a [Starlance] at the villain. It hit her, and she flinched back, but her braids whipped out—right at my wand hand!

[Dramatic Damage! +1 Drama Point]

At the same time, the staff-wielding V slammed it into the ground, and a massive demon shimmered into being in front of him. Fursona cut off her dive, swerving wildly to avoid the thing’s outstretched claws. She caromed off a tree and hit the ground, rolling in a cloud of feathers, then took off again.

I backed off as the hair-powered villainess moved forward; neither looked like Grit vils, so we just had to wait for an opportunity to take them down. Braids thrashed out at me, and I returned fire. Every [Starlance] hit, and even though the Third V kept a braid back to block, I couldn’t help but feel like she was a step or two slow. “What’s wrong? Bad hair day?” I taunted, firing another Starlance.

[Dramatic Damage! +1 Drama Point]

[Dramatic Damage! +1 Drama Point]

“No, this is harder than it looks,” she responded, slamming all three braids down onto the grass as I rolled to the side. They swept along behind me, and I used [Quick-Time Change] and [Freeze Framed] the damage, switching to Rainy Day.

[Flashy Fitting-Room! +1 Flamboyance Point]

[Steel Yourself! +1 Grit Point]

She stumbled as the expected hit failed to happen, off balance. Then, before she could retract her hair tentacles, I used [Wind Front] for some space and started up a [Thunderhead] to get a little more. The storm cloud built up as the Third V’s hair whipped back, jerking her neck painfully. I blinked at that; surely she would have learned how to manage her own power’s drawbacks?

[Badass Move! +1 Badass Point]

[Pause for Effect! +1 Drama Point]

The demon summoner had, somehow, not managed to finish Fursona off either. In fact, she looked like she was winning, outmaneuvering the gigantic demon and getting screeches and knock-backs in on the V himself. He summoned a horde of tiny flying imps, but Fursona shrieked, and they fell apart into wisps of…magic or something.

Meanwhile, the storm was building.

I ducked one hair tendril, then another, but the third slammed against my stomach, dragging me toward the villainess. She laughed. “Getting the hang of this yet? I sure am!”

“That’s awful,” I said as she squeezed me tighter and tighter. Another braid wrapped around my arm, pinning it to my back painfully, and together, they started dragging me across the quad’s grass and cement. I tried to get another [Wind Front] off, but my arm was pinned too tightly. My face bounced off the cement, and I winced. Part of me wanted to switch to Copy Cat and give her more than she could handle.

[HP 5/13]

Instead, I let the storm build as she dragged me closer and closer. The villainess grinned. “Guess you’re all hair-tied up, Understudy. Gift-wrapped for the boss and everything. I’ll get the first permanent spot for this!”

“Hey, what does—“ I slammed into the concrete, gasping in pain. “Ow! “What does static do to hair?”

“What?”

“Let’s find out! [Ride the Lightning]!”

[Electric Lightshow! +1 Flamboyance Point]

[Thunderstruck! +1 Drama Point]

The air filled with electricity, and I directed it all at my foe. She couldn’t exactly dodge without letting me go, and the lightning ripped through all three braids, surging into her. She flew backward, hair frizzing out as the braids fell apart, and I [Quick-Time Changed] back to Understudy and fired another [Starlance] her way before she could attempt to recover.

[Flashy Fitting-Room! +1 Flamboyance Point]

[Dramatic Damage! +1 Drama Point]

“What’s the matter? Too many split ends? I hear conditioner helps with that!”

She didn’t move and said nothing except a groan. I watched to make sure she wasn’t going anywhere, and when she stayed down, I turned my attention to the Second V. Fursona had it mostly in hand, though; he didn’t seem any more familiar with his powers than the Third V.

Come to think of it, most of the Vs hadn’t been super-competent. I fired a pair of [Starlances] at the Second V, and a moment later, Fursona’s screech knocked him to the ground. He didn’t move, and the massive demon she’d been dodging faded away to nothing. She landed next to the vil, made sure he was out, and wandered over to me. “That’s all…four of them? Aren’t there only supposed to be three Vs?”

[End of Act Two: Act Three in 3 Minutes]

“Yeah. Something hasn’t been right with the Vs. The sword V was competent, but the martial artist one fell apart when things started going haywire. The cowboy gun-fu expert was solid, but the one with the robot just summoned the baton-bot and called it good. She barely did anything else the whole fight. Surfboard V wasn’t that tough, either. And now these four. Something’s off here for sure.”

“What do you think?” Fursona asked.

“I think…” I wasn’t sure what I thought. But in the end, it didn’t matter. We’d beaten the Vs, which meant that the One L was on campus without his enforcers. The war with 3V1L was over. We just had to corner him, and it’d be done.

A convoy of black SUVs worked its way across the quad, their wide bodies covering the entire bike path as they slowly approached. Fursona popped her shoulders; I could hear it through the wings. I grinned. “I think the time has come to end 3V1L.”

“You got it, boss-girl,” she said through our comms. My smile grew wider, even as something exploded near the Student Union Building and a super flew overhead, screaming.

The SUVs pulled to a stop, one after another, and the doors opened, disgorging a horde of henches. A moment later, a man got out of the middle one. Even in his 3V1L helmet, I recognized him. The three-piece suit was immaculate, right down to the lapel pin on its collar and nametag I couldn’t quite read across its right breast pocket, and even as he snapped his briefcase closed and set it back inside, I realized exactly what had happened, and why there were so many goddamn Vs on campus today.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t Magical Girl Understudy,” The Agent said, lips stretched into a smile that was anything but friendly. “You’ve been a thorn in my side for a year now, but with Jackson and that stick in the mud Mays distracted, now you’re all mine. Henches, you know what to do.”

Act Three started, and as the henches started showing superpowers all around me, I threw myself into battle. One way or another, The Agent was going down!