Thursday, December 25
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Even superheroes have to work holidays sometimes.
I dashed through Tottargarten’s halls, The Cloud bobbing behind me like a Christmas-themed balloon on his leash. “Hurry, Understuffy! The Present Pilferer is getting away!”
The Present Pilferer was fast, but I was faster. Hopefully. “I’m running as fast as I can!” I shouted back. The chrome camera drone followed us around a corner, filming everything for the studio.
I also wore holiday finery, though I wasn’t Understudy right now. The Cloud loved my Rainy Day costume, and he threw a fit every time I tried to switch out of it, so I’d given up trying to switch out of my sixth-grade form. It was easier to give the pint-sized superhero what he wanted. I did have an ugly sweater over the top, though.
The Narrator wouldn’t give us the full stories of why The Cloud and Kaiju Kid were here on Christmas Day. Supposedly, their parents had to work, same as me, and The Narrator was more than happy to hang onto them for the morning. She had briefed us both on Kaiju Kid’s power, though. Fursona was to stop her from eating refined sugar—especially juice boxes—by any means necessary. Otherwise? Two-hundred-foot plasma-breathing lizard.
[The Grinch’s Christmas] had been a standard Tottergarten G-rated Episode, as The Narrator had made clear from the start. This was our payment for some of the strings Rocko had pulled for my series finale. Fanfic was…The Narrator’s clone? Evil twin? Alter ego? No one had been specific, but part of her studio’s price for unleashing the villain was our service today. So here my sidekick and girlfriend Fursona were, working on Christmas.
We’d caught Teacher’s Pet and Pranky Jones trying to get the doors open for the Anti-Nap League’s getaway car, busted them, and heard about a brand-new villain: The Present Pilferer. Then, instead of immediately hunting him down, ‘Mrs. N’ taught a lesson on sharing but also respecting others’ belongings. Now, we were finally in hot pursuit of The Present Pilferer and his lieutenant, who I was 95% sure was Jungle Jim in a Yeti suit.
God, Rated-G Episodes were ridiculous.
Wham!
I ran face-first into a gigantic wall of fur. The hulking figure turned a moment later and roared an icy roar at me. “RAUGH! Who dares challenge The Abomina-Bill Snowman?”
It could only be Jungle Jim in that suit. It was massive, easily seven feet tall, and so wide its arms rubbed the hall’s walls. Jim’s costume sported vicious-looking claws that, if I had to guess, were rubber. The teeth probably were, too, especially since Jim’s face glared between them. Still, the Abomina-Bill Snowman’s costume would probably make my kangaroo-themed sidekick jealous. I had to beat him before Fursona showed up, or she’d probably want this for Christmas. And I hadn’t gotten her this.
“Magic Girl Understuffy’s gonna take you down!” The Cloud shouted.
I facepalmed. Then I ducked away as the wall of white fur surged toward us. “[Stellar Ray]!” I shouted, waving my blue and gold-white wand at the Abomina-Bill Snowman. The bubble ray—a Rainy Day special—shot out, popping against the Yeti’s fur. Each explosion shoved him back just a tiny bit. It didn’t hit harder than a boxer’s punch, and Jungle Jim had been Brick House before he retired. I couldn’t actually hurt him.
[You Hurt Someone! +1 Sad Point]
G-Rated Episodes overrode the Style System and made it all little-kiddy, but that was a Drama point. I’d been earning points all Episode on my way to the fifty I’d need to roll for another skill. The skills flowed a lot faster in Tokyexico, but I had a long way to go.
The gigantic Yeti juggernauted toward me, filling the hall. The further it ran, though, the more of a headwind pushed it back. I looked up. The Cloud was…blowing? Yep, he was blowing as hard as he could. His face went red as more air than should be possible rushed from his lungs, tossing the Abomina-Bill Snowman back.
As the Yeti somersaulted through the hall, I saw an odd look on Jungle Jim’s face. Pride.
“Cool! I’m a windstorm!” The Cloud panted.
The Abomina-Bill Snowman crashed through the double doors and tumbled into the play-place room. He picked himself up with a theatrical groan, standing next to a green-furred monster. Though similar to the Yeti, this one was thin and smirking. The smirk faded as someone slammed through a different door—A toddler in a dinosaur suit. Fursona followed the little girl through, trying desperately to take something from her.
Something shiny. With a straw.
“Oh [Beep!],” The Abomina-Bill Snowman muttered. Then he started shouting. “Narrator! Narrator!”
I had just enough time to wonder what his censorship penalty would be. Then, the little girl started to change. Spines grew from her back, the suit’s teeth sharpened, and she began to grow. The childish roars turned guttural and feral, and she stomped a foot. The building shook. Her head reached the ceiling, pushing ceiling tiles away.
Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings.
“And then everyone calmed down,” The Narrator’s voice echoed from a loudspeaker, “and Kaiju Kid took a nap instead of drinking the juice box.”
= = = = =
Someone slammed through a different door—a toddler in a dinosaur suit. She yawned and curled up on the playroom’s rubber mat, an unopened Capri Sun in her hand. Fursona burst through a moment later. She paused, then gingerly pulled the juice box away from the kid. Everyone sighed in relief.
Crisis averted.
“Forget this,” the green-furred villain said. She fled toward the door Kaiju Kid had just come from, with The Abomina-Bill Snowman following closely behind. The bag full of presents they’d been stealing sat on the playroom floor, abandoned.
“Yay! We stopped them from ruining Christmas!” The Cloud shouted, waking up Kaiju Kid, who started looking for her juice box. Fursona hid it in her pouch, whistling fake-innocently.
I cleared my throat as the camera drone hovered in front of me. “No, Cloud—“
“The Cloud!”
“…The Cloud. The spirit of Christmas is giving and togetherness. As long as we have each other, our friends and family, and those we care about, The Present Pilferer and The Abomina-Bill Snowman can’t ever ruin the holidays.”
God, I hated G-Rated Episodes so much.
[Episode Finished!]
[Episode: Short: The Grinch’s Christmas! - G]
[Penalties: N/A]
[Short Finished! +3 of each Style Point]
[Winner Winner! +2 of each Style Point]
[Role Focus: Sad+Strong - Goal Unmet]
[Alias - Understudy] [Archetype - Magical Girl] [Community Rank - 348/523]
[HP 5/7]
[Styles and Skills]
►Archetype Skill - Transformation Sequence
►Badass (46)
►Cunning (48)
►Drama (51) (Skill Roll Available)
► Hometown Heroine 1
► Bit-Part Barrage 1
►Flamboyance (14)
►Signature Skill - Adaptive Armoire
►Stored Costumes: (Rainy Day, Lab Assistant Panic)
►Spotlight Strike 1
►Starwave Sail 1
► Flickerform 1
►Grit (16)
----------------------------------------
Bianca pulled the Capri Sun out of her pouch and took off her fursuit while I untransformed. She grabbed her backpack and slipped through the maintenance door before I could stop her, heading for the bedroom. She had shorts and a T-shirt on; it was hot in the suit. I wore a blue wool dress and leggings—not holiday-themed, but wintery enough. I hadn’t taken my skill roll; I had a lot on my mind today, and I’d do it later.
I was pretty sure we had Walnut Tower’s whole thirteenth floor to ourselves. Most people headed home for the holidays; Man vs. Nature Seven had screwed that up for anyone not from Tokyexico City, but most people had friends to spend Christmas itself with. Bee and I had plans with our friend Su-Bin’s family, but that wasn’t for a few hours.
I’d learned something new about Bianca over winter break; She was a present-hunter. A dirty, filthy present-hunter.
I’d first caught her just after our Superpower Ethics final. She’d slipped out of bed, waking me up, and raided my closet, looking for…something. There wasn’t anything to find yet, though. I’d blown it off as a one-off. It was not. For the next almost three weeks, I’d been in a battle of the minds with my girlfriend. I’d put off my purchase as long as I could. Then, I’d hidden it in different spots—usually ones I knew she’d already looked in. When that stopped working, I built a special hangar, and the already-wrapped gift now hung inside my skull T-shirt in my closet.
She hadn’t found it yet, and I’d asked her to stop after I hid it there, so she probably didn’t know what it was. I fished the tiny box out with one hand, hiding it behind my back, and sat on the couch.
Bee stepped out of the bathroom a few minutes later. She ducked down, hurried back to my secret base, and returned a moment later. Unlike me, she now wore a suitably Christmasy outfit; a green ugly sweater with a reindeer that looked more like a moose, jeans, and heavy-duty wool socks. As always, she smelled like green apples, and she had a gift of her own in one hand. She sat beside me, put her hand around my waist, and started feeling around.
“Hey now, don’t get grabby,” I complained a moment before her hand clamped down on the present. I grappled with her, hand behind my back, trying to keep it away from her, but eventually, she outmaneuvered me and hurried off to the couch’s far side. I grimaced dramatically and stood up. “At least wait a minute, okay? I need to make some hot chocolate.”
“Awwwww, fine. Make some for me.”
I could hear her shaking the damn box as I slowly walked into the kitchen and read the hot chocolate instructions out loud. “Hurry up, dammit,” she complained.
I measured out just the right amount of water for each mug, double-checked the chocolate powder scoop to ensure it was perfect, and then thought of an even more evil idea. I sat on the counter and hummed ‘White Christmas’ the whole time the microwave ran. It dinged. I grabbed the mugs and started walking back.
I’d almost reached the couch when I paused, looking thoughtful. “The marshmallows! I forgot the marshmallows!”
Bianca grabbed her mug before I could turn around. She glared daggers of pure hate at me, and I grinned sheepishly. “I guess I could skip the marshmallows for now?”
“Damn right you could,” she said. She ripped into the wrapping paper, which flew everywhere. My gift was unwrapped almost before I could blink. She clipped it around her neck, and just as I’d suspected, the shiny silver necklace hung low enough that the kangaroo wouldn’t be visible.
“You can loop it twice, too, if you want it to be a choker,” I said.
“No thanks. It’d be harder to keep my secret identity. Some heroes actually care about that.” She stuck her tongue out at me.
“Look, I thought I was doing a good job!”
“Yeah, you sure fooled everyone.” Bianca laughed. She had a nice laugh, and she’d gotten over the awkwardness again after revealing her identity—and that my attempts to keep a secret had fooled no one.
“Teach me your ways, oh full-body-covering fursuit girl,” I teased back. She wasn’t wrong. I hadn’t worried too much about my secret identity back home; Peter and Collidus had both known, and it’d been easy to…not hang out with too many people. Here, it was different, and I’d need to be careful.
She handed me my present, which I set on my lap.
I tore the wrapping paper off Bianca’s box, which was much wider than mine, though similar in height. Then I popped the white cardboard open, expecting a similar necklace to the one I’d given her. Instead, I saw a Tarot deck and a cat’s collar. The same collar Pataki had included on her improved Fursona fursuit.
We needed to see Rocko. Now.
She’d given me a piece of her costume.