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Episode 35 Who I Am/Part 4

Episode 35 Who I Am/Part 4

"The reason behind it is because of her...personal experiences with dealing pain to others. However, ever since she got here, into this world, she was forced to deal with pain, to feel it herself...and hence why I had to step in. I just festered inside her and did everything I could to stop the madness while making sure that she only fought when she needed it and she fought well when she needed to. Call me her or her other half, I don't care. After the first world war, when it was over and we completely destroyed Kaima, we found out what her powers could do...well this. Up until that day after the Second World War, her powers managed to create a body for me, moulded after her, of course. The key difference between Dante and me is that he takes over, while I switch out with Hikari. After I gained this body, I almost immediately had to take over, as Hikari...died, from the battle. She never 'revived' herself. She just really slowly build up her body after it was all done, because I took over for her to protect her, and therefore she did to herself what she did to me. About the memories and everything...I don't know. Be it might be a side effect or anything, she lost them. We then found out about each other again, and additionally, we discovered that our memories can be shared to an extent. Everything we do, everything we say, we can share with each other...by choice. We keep the memories we choose not to share for our own reasons...and ever after her 'resurrection', I took full advantage of it and filtered everything out, slowly giving her exactly what she needed and nothing more."

"Wait, so instead of giving her the full picture, you just filtered what you want out? That's not good at all! Ever heard that 'everything happens for a reason'?", Tiki said.

"Bullshit. There was no reason for you to do any of that. War? What's the point, it happens again and again only for the pages of history to frown upon it in every way for it to eventually repeat itself. This pain she felt...for what reason? 'Those deserving of justice and those deserving of misfortune are to be served equally. The only different thing may be the time as it passes, but whether by your hand or that of fate, all will come full circle.'. And yet after millennia, nothing is to justify the meaning behind all this pain. I foolishly thought I could finally give her a deserved happy ending by filtering the memories...but then he came along. He started to remind her of everything, and it all eventually came back to her. Now we are just back on the same track, but it seems he took others down with him this time."

"I don't feel like being taken down with him. Honestly, he's pretty fun to be around, so I think I'll stay beside him. And really...it looks like he has his fair share of pain to handle." Anya looked at Dante defusing the bombs outside.

"Hmph. whatever it may be...I will not empathize with him. For now, let me keep going on with what I wanted to say in the first place. Magi approached Hikari from the first moment, and there's some critical information you must know about. She told me...well, everything from that day. The Burnout engulfed what few lights remained of Dirunon. Dante was found at the steps of the royal palace where the king of Dirunon who escaped with his people from war resided, in a small town named Direon. That's where most of you first met. And here's the catch Glady, is not Dante's father. Contrary to that, Glady is the sole reason why everything, including Dante's people and family were slaughtered before his eyes."

"Wait, what...I thought that...I thought that he escaped, and Cecilia was just left behind to finish her duty!", Anya said.

"Not at all according to Magi, were his entire family, along with him, there. There were some blurry details, but the general consensus is that Glady was a Sentinel, like Magi, and was the last Sentinel to break out of the god's control completely thanks to her. However, before he did, he led one final assault with the Gods Army against Direon, to finish off everyone who escaped from Dirunon...well that's supposedly it, but we now know why they did it, presumably Cecilia. When they first met Dante, they had to fight him on account of his exceptional skills in battle, which were backed by him activating his 'Berserk' mode on them. I was to guess, despite him being very, very young at the time adding up Cecilia's training with her own set of exceptional combat skills for him, Mellistar must have played a role in passing down millennia of knowledge and muscle memory from battles to him. In any case, he couldn't control his powers at all, causing him to nearly die after his internal organs suffered massive corruption and bleeding when his body rejected his Obsulyte signature. Glady and Magi managed to save him... but they replaced some of his memories with fake ones."

"God...wait, so that's the hazy part about his memories, and that's why he feels lost at times?" Anya worryingly said.

"If I was to guess, the answer to it would be yes." Enemy answered.

"Since Guardians are also always connected to the one they were chosen to, doesn't that mean that Yuno could also be affected by it?" Tiki said.

"I would guess no on that part. They used a special neural device they received from Drima, the Sentinel currently stationed in Gardel where you're headed, to do so. The device would normally be used in interrogation to extract information, but I guess they flipped it around. Guardians are affected by the natural cause's more than technical ones. If for example, Dante hopefully hit his head and bled to death-er, I mean lost his memories, then yes, Yuno could've been affected too. However, Dante's memories were forgotten, or locked back due to amnesia, rather than taken away and replaced by others, meaning his memories still exist in this world but are just not inside Dante. Yuno would probably be met by either the fake memories or a white haze if he tried to look that far back."

"Why would they require a set of fake memories after taking already existing ones?" Luna asked.

"Because after realizing his mistake, Glady wanted to raise Dante instead, which would surely not be a thing if Dante still had his memories of the event. As far as Magi told me, Glady spent every day of his life thereafter raising and training Dante in the day, and hating while hurting himself in the night. His burden for the actions he did under the gods' control was just...too much for him to take. His death under the monsters sent by Makaro and Kikaro was another thing, I never expected such foul beings to kill someone so strong, but I guess by that point Glady had to let go on account of the time is right for Dante to meet Hikari and regain his memories, or simply lost it and didn't use his powers because he wanted a better passing for a warrior than his own sword. The whole smithy job at that quiet area was the closest Glady could get to without triggering a runback from Dante's memories in order to also further train him. Admittedly, he was blown away by Dante's skills, while they trained and laughed together."

"This is so...wrong in so many ways. Why did this...have to happen?" Anya said.

"Exactly...why? It's a good question, good luck answering it. My biggest guess would be because Makaro and Kikaro wanted to get their greedy ass hands back in controlling the entire world and make it a hellhole, so they wanted all the Trail Blazers gone, starting with Cecilia and a potential fatality on Hikari to top it off.", Enemy scoffed.

"Trail Blazers? Is that a group or an entity?" Luna asked.

"Group. Consisted of Naga, Hikari and Cecilia. Their roles were the 'Nurturing Dragon Mother', the 'Light Beyond Stars', and 'Omnipotent Edge'. As you can tell, or will tell by the lack of any evidence, even in that magic book that's helping Dante out there, historically they didn't exist. That's because the light was shed on Hikari above all. As one and the other two decided to take the lead. Now, some texts might also say of Naga somewhere, but I doubt much of anything will be known about Cecilia specifically, since they all generally decide to conceal their identities, for obvious reasons. Failing to conceal said identity could lead...well..." Enemy sighed. "To Cecilia's unfortunate demise when she got found out. These 3 were responsible for holding the world together at all times. Now, you could say that it was because they were chosen by some godly force, but the truth is that seeing that Makaro and Kikaro were pieces of shit and wielding the ever-sacred ability of 'common sense', they just didn't want others to suffer anymore. As for their origin...well, I'd suppose they were both born in this world. Naga, at least, I'm somewhat sure was born whole out of the existence of Obsulyte, so there's that."

"I see...but that title they gave to Hikari...it's a bit odd. 'Light Beyond Stars'...", Tiki wondered.

Enemy sighed. "I could be up all night and give you a thousand answers for a thousand questions, but frankly speaking, I can screw up somewhere where Drima will not. You're reaching Gardel tomorrow. Besides the truth that Hikari wanted to tell you about herself after finding it out, there's also her fear. Upon reaching Gardel, you'll most likely come across Magi in some way or another. According to text messages and phone calls Hikari made, Drima will then remove the memories and give them back from the device to Dante. What she fears is what Dante has actually seen or known...considering his berserk state at the moment his memories were replaced is something really, really nasty, so you might want to prepare yourselves to save the city from being levelled to the ground. I don't really know what may happen, but if he has a mental breakdown due to unfiltered memories as I did with Hikari's case, I will kill him. And believe me when I say that no one will even remotely come close to stopping me. So here's the first ultimatum to answer to, forced to say because of Hikari's begging. Stop Dante when he goes berserk, or watch me stop him once and for all."

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"If you're that strong to take him down, then why not simply stop him?", Tiki asked.

"Because unlike you, I'm not taking any risks. Because there is no reward in the end even if I do.", Enemy menacingly said. "You can go now. I don't have anything more to say, and there's something you all need to attend to, urgently or not."

"I guess so...I will go help the big guy with the rest of the bombs. Already left him hanging too long anyway. But it isn't over yet! There's still much more to catch on...from both Hikari and you. I can't stop the excitement of it all!" Anya left smiling.

"I guess it's boulder-smashing time. I'm gonna run over the details with the furry about this suit tomorrow...Luna, help me if you will. I'm gonna need a place to crash for tonight and all rooms are currently blocked."

Enemy jolted up. "Actually...I forgot. Tiki, can you go without Luna? I'd like to ask her something."

"Ah, sure. It's not like I can deny it, since, you know, I'll get my ass kicked if I say no.", Tiki looked at Enemy with fear.

"Thanks.", Enemy replied with a heavy tone.

As the creaking door shut behind Luna, the two of them were left inside the room alone, with a slight scent of fear filling the atmosphere...

"What is it that you wanted to ask me?"

"I heard exactly what happened downstairs, Luna. Or rather, Hikari did it on my behalf. You said that you were part...mechanical?"

"Indeed. A lot has changed since I had last seen you inside here. During the Burnout, the orphanage was targeted, but the Roaming Phoenix was nowhere to be found at that time. However, after the first time that she assisted us in the Molotov-induced attack, it would sound selfish for her to remain within our grounds in such a way."

"So back then, it wasn't a natural fire taken advantage of, was it? In any case, how did it come to be this way? Did you hurt yourself and had something implanted to save haste?"

"No. I simply got augmented. My being is partially mechanical now."

"What? What do you mean?" Enemy began to tremble.

"During your absence, after the takeover when Edel took over, it didn't stop at the orphanage being overrun by soldiers. Edel further indulged all available orphans into heavy-duty experimentation. Most died, but I was the only one to partially survive, as experimental success was achieved with me. Afterwards, I dedicated my life further to protecting Lina. She too has been augmented, however, it is to an extent where her growth outside childhood is paused, due to her immune and metabolism systems being modified. I myself, was instead fit into a larger frame to further suit my capabilities. Some of the surviving papers in this room are actually blueprints of prototype frames and profiles of test subje-er, orphans."

A grim face came over Enemy, as she struggled to continue the conversation further, without her voice cracking...

"I see...so you. Never mind. That's all I can ask of you for now. I'm already too exhausted reliving what I don't want to. You should probably head down anyway, Tiki might need your help."

"Understood."

Luna turned away and started walking towards the door. She took a faint look over her shoulder before going outside, as she gazed at Enemy sitting on the chair behind the wooden desk...

Luna paused. "Oh and, Hikari. I am glad you've returned."

A small smile formed on Enemy's face. "Same here."

As soon as Luna closed the door to the office and Enemy was left all alone, her relaxed hands turned into fists and her smile into gritting teeth.

"Even Luna and Lina. Was it that I'm too slow...was it because I got careless?! What was it?! Why couldn't I just be there and do something about it?! Why god dammit, why?!"

Her eyes were now wet from her drooling tears she got up and smacked the desk again, pushing the chair away to her side.

"It's not Hikari...it's not me! Then what is it?! Why can't everything be carved to a happy ending?! It's such bullshit! I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!" she yelled and wept. "I hate it..." she pressed against the window.

Upon relaxing her crying and looking up to the window, she saw a reflection through her tears. Was it Hikari's, or was it hers? Who was to blame or take the blame? She knew it was neither, but she just couldn't help at the sorrow of seeing that one image that made her burst into a fit of rage.

"You goddamn piece of shit..." she grabbed the desk with one hand. "You goddamn useless piece of shit! Hurrah!"

Tossing the desk out of the window, her voice crack synced with the bursting of the glass, and the tears in her eyes now began to take on a shade of red, as small cuts began to form under her eyes and cheeks. It was not the blood and wounds of battle she had gotten used to, but rather what wounds she wished that she, her powers or Hikari could heal. A gentle breeze followed after the broken window, gently caressing her face and swiping some of her rightful furies with it, as she was brought back into her grim reality. As her eyes widened, realizing her actions, her tears kept flowing silently, as she kneeled to avoid being seen and lowered her voice to avoid being heard. She could only whisper her apologies and hope that the wind carried them with it, to those she wanted them to receive.

"Auntie Dosil...I...I'm sorry...sorry..." Enemy cried silently.

The more and more she cried, from behind her, a shadowy figure kept approaching, hanging over her back and extending its arm at her. As it leaned forward, Enemy's reflexes kicked in, creating a sword in her hand and quickly twisting around, taking on a sitting position and grabbing its hand. She then firmly placed her sword on the figure's neck, trying to act as if the tears never existed.

"What the-Terna?!" Enemy yelled.

Terna kept her cool. "It's ok...I heard the entire thing. I was eavesdropping from behind the door when you entered since I saw all of you up here. You did a mistake and you messed up, but it's fine, isn't it? Did you not learn from it? It will always hurt, the more mistakes you do, the bigger the pain will always get...but that's really why there's a reason for the pain to happen, right?"

Enemy got up and backed away. "You have no idea what a real mistake is like."

"I don't know how or why but...I think I do. I just did one today. And it felt as if the world ended..." Terna softly said.

Enemy snapped out of it. "Tsk. You have no idea what you're talking about."

Enemy jumped outside the broken window, facing Terna in the process, leaving her alone instead. Despite both the need and will to follow behind, Terna knew that it was best to give her what she never gave herself. Space. She instead turned around and walked out of the office room, calmly walking downstairs to meet with Tiki and Yuno.

"Huh. You actually managed to clean this all by yourself?" Tiki looked around.

"Well, some of it. I left a few boulders hanging around because the building might need them for support." Yuno tapped on some boulders to check stability.

Coming out of the main hall, were Anya, Dante and an angry Hikari, moving forward with a hefty-looking bag.

"Obsulyte-infused bombs? Seriously? What if you got hurt?!" Hikari angrily said.

"It was in good faith!" Anya said with a lowered tail.

"Yea, for a second I lost all faith but not my body," Lass whispered. "What the hell took you so long anyways?! You seriously left me with a bag of bombs to defuse and just hopped out?!" he yelled at Anya.

"Business I needed to attend to." Anya shrugged.

"Nice going, next time remember to finish one thing and start another, especially when the former revolves around the minuscule subject of...I dunno, defusing bombs!" Lass took out his phone and started deleting his search history.

"Wacha doing there? Search history deletion...ooh~", Anya smugged.

"Yeah, search history deletion. Because of your bombs and my searches with QR scans, I have a solid chance of being placed on multiple government watch lists!" Lass angrily said.

"You are a young smith going around from town to town asking for an army alliance to save the world. You're probably already placed in multiple government watch lists, and other lists besides that." Anya said.

Hikari facepalmed. "Please tell me that the rooms are freed up..."

"Yeah, just now," Yuno answered her.

"There's enough for everyone to get a piece. And I'm gonna grab my bed now. Catch y'all in the morning." Tiki moved into one of the bedrooms.

"Yeah, I feel like crashing too," Anya said.

"No! No more crashes for you!" Tiki yelled from the bedroom.

"Oh, shut up! And where's Luna, wasn't she upstairs a second ago?" Anya said.

Terna slowly walked down the stairs. "Yeah, she went to sleep with Lina. She's been having some bad dreams lately, and wanted to check in with her just in case."

"All right, that settles that then. I'm off.", Anya walked towards a bedroom.

"Yuno, come on. Let's go too." Terna grabbed Yuno and moved to her room, humming along the way.

"What the-let go! I...I'm not...your..." Yuno began to give into the humming and fell asleep.

Terna giggled. "I knew I'd remember the right sequence. Good night you guys," she said to Hikari and Lass.

Hikari realized the move Terna tried to make and turned around to face Lass.

"Lass...I..." she tried to force words out of her mouth." Dante, I mean. If you still remember that name, somehow. I want you to know that whatever happens, however, you view me after this trip to Gardard or this journey as a whole. I'll always remember you as both a friend and one of the best things that ever happened in my life. I know you won't make much sense out of these words now but...when you do, please...please remember me!"

Lass slowly turned his face to her of his phone screen. "Risa..."

"Yeah?"

"Sorry, did you say something?" he pulled out a pair of headphones from his ears. "I was wearing those ever since I was defusing the bombs to calm my nerves. Always liked listening to music when I worked or was stressed in general."

Hikari felt like smashing her head against the nearest wall. "Nope. I said nothing. Goodnight." she moved away at the speed of a thousand stone statues.

"Uh...ok? Goodnight." Lass awkwardly said. "What's up with her today? Ah, whatever, today is tomorrow anyway. Might as well catch some sleep while I can."

A fruitless conversation set to the side, and a fruitful gathering completed, everyone turned the lights out as they eagerly prepared to meet the gates of the capital of the Gardard nation. Some with excitement, others with excitement, one thing was for sure. Their visit there would shatter more pieces of the confusing ice between them than any of their other adventures…