“There you go.” I said and smiled a little as I handed the bag to the customer. He gave me a shy little bow and headed for the door. I was actually impressed he could bring himself to do that much. Chiefly because his purchase was one of the dirty magazines from the center aisle. His ‘friend’ clearly lacked the same courage and was standing there just on the other side ‘reading’. If you want to call it that, that is.

I had to admit, Suki knew how to arrange her store, I never thought about it before, but the aisles with ‘that’ material was facing ‘away’ from the register and had another pair of parallel aisles on either side of it, and two running perpendicular thus affording the patron some small degree of ‘privacy’ by letting them feel like they’re boxed in.

Those who visited that aisle as the day went on seemed to buy ‘those’ magazines roughly eight times out of ten, an exceptional ratio. I knew it was exceptional because tragically I have sometimes been forced to run errands for myself. When that does happen, I’ve seen what people do in the stores, I’ve seen those naughty magazines here and there, and I’ve seen young people walk by, eyeing those anxiously, desperately even.

But seldom did they buy even though they wanted to, they didn’t have the courage to look, so they couldn’t take the next step. It’s funny how that works, it really is.

Suki got them to look at it, and therefore usually got them to buy.

My estimation of my friend went up another notch. I smiled when I thought about her, she was always offering me work. Always a kind word. Always encouraging me. ‘You’re a smart girl, you could do anything you want with your life. You don’t have to just lie around and wait for life to happen, come work at my store, that way you can take care of yourself better.’

Of course there were rumors that I was rich, I was after all, a foreigner living in this country with no job, there’s no way I was getting public assistance. It was hard not to like Suki’s motherly attitude toward me, who she saw as a wayward young woman frittering away her days.

But I had no idea Suki was so savvy about her business, right down to where she put the naughty things that Jin probably snuck looks at whenever he could, like most boys his age.

The ding of a new customer caught my ear and I looked over to see a slew of students stroll in, then darted my eyes to the clock. ‘Really? That long?’ I asked myself, somehow the day had just slipped past without my noticing.

Maybe because there was always something to do, check the shelves, wipe up a spill, process a transaction… The time had slipped past with hardly a blip, and now it was later in the afternoon and school was out. I looked past the gaggle of young boys and girls to the clear day outside. Jin wouldn’t be with them, he’d be spending at least a few hours in cram school. I normally wouldn’t see him, if at all, for a few more hours.

You’d think he’d get more help with his math and other subjects there, but? For some reason he liked to ask me.

I waved to the students coming in and listened while they chattered away about whatever school drama had them occupied today. “Welcome to Toriyama’s.” I said, and then my brow furrowed not one minute later when Jin Toriyama walked in with the look of a stunned bunny on his face.

“Wha- why?” He asked, and then his eyes caught me behind the counter.

“Kayobi?!” He exclaimed and strode swiftly over the floor to stand across from me.

I snorted. “Yeah. That’s my name. Can I help you find something?” I couldn’t resist the urge. I wanted to mess with him a little.

“Wh-What are you doing here?” He stumbled over his words as he rushed them out.

“Would you believe I’m counting how many dirty magazines I see young boys buy?” I asked with a smirk, and as he turned red in the face I added, “So, what’s your number? Or do you just sneak peaks at them?”

“Ah, wha- I don’t… you can’t… this isn’t-” He stammered and stuttered and shook as he was flustered, and I did all that I could to restrain myself from laughter.

“Some of those were words. But you need to put them together right, come on, you can do it, you’re a big boy!” I clapped my hands to urge him on.

“I… why are you here?!” He demanded, his voice going up a bit in pitch as his flusteredness overtook him.

“Because here is where I take the money for the stuff people want to buy, dummy.” I said with a smirk, “Surely you’ve worked here long enough to know that.”

“That’s not what I mean, you…” He stopped, he searched for something to call me, “you!” He finally finished.

“Brilliant retort. This is why you shouldn’t be quitting cram school.” I said with a straight face.

“But… but how did you get the key?” He asked and put his hand into the pocket of his dark pants like he was checking to see if his copy was still there.

Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

“I went by to see your mom, she gave it to me, I offered to handle the place until she gets out. She gave me her copy.” I answered, “What, did you think I broke in here?” I smirked a little, losing my deadpan expression and I struck a prowler pose, hunched over with fingers turned down and pantomimed some creeping steps. “Yes, you caught me, my secret identity is Kayobi the catburglar, and I’m so good at breaking and entering that I don’t even need a toolkit. I just teleport.”

“But…” He paused, looked over his shoulder to see that the other students who went in before him were busy elsewhere in the store, then leaned toward me and said, “How is she paying you.”

“Wait… we’re supposed to get paid? Is that why people work?” I asked and covered my open mouth with one hand, “I am shocked. Just… shocked… nay, dumbfounded! I have found the dumb, so stunned am I.”

All he could do was blink at me, so I finally showed the poor boy some mercy, “Relax, I told her I’d do it for free. When she gets out of the hospital she can just do my laundry and make a few meals and we’ll call it square.”

“I-I-I didn’t expect to find my Buddah in hell today…” He stammered, but I just shrugged it off.

“I just don’t want to do chores. So don’t worry about it. Go on and head back to cram school, you’ll be late, but just tell them you’re late because you got bitten by a stray dog or something.” I said, and he blinked at me again as he processed what I said.

“That’s… not how that expression works… not exactly, anyway.” He muttered and I reached up and flipped my orangish hair back with one hand to remind him I’m not from here.

Some of my colleagues asked me once why I don’t disguise myself as somebody who looks like everybody in the neighborhood and whatnot. And the answer is pretty simple. From my colleagues' perspective, if you look like everyone else, you blend in perfectly.

But that’s why I’m better than all of them at my job. It’s not enough to look like people, you have to act like them too, and cultural norms touch everything. On one world, when you’re about to enter a room you’ve never been to, you always tap your foot three times to let the spirits inside know you’re coming. Don’t do that, and people will know you’re a fraud, or at least you’ll stand out in a negative way.

On another world, every first meeting between strangers involves an extensive discussion of ancestry to try to find some common ground and minimize the chance of violence. If I were to go there disguised as one of those, I’d fall flat and get into trouble fast.

But when you’re obviously foreign, people excuse your ignorance as, ‘Well they’re not from here, of course they don’t know better.’

So misusing an expression slightly draws no notice. Thus I blend in by standing out.

Yeah, I’m the best. “Whatever.” I smirked at Jin and gave him a gentle punch on the shoulder, “Hurry up and get back, University waits for no one, and neither do the teachers here, I’ll lock up tonight when I’m done.” I promised.

Jin’s entire body shook, his lower lip quivered, “If you’re not going to buy something, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

His eyes were full of tears, and he shouted, “Thank you!” He then bowed at the waist, turned, and ran out of the store as fast as his feet could carry him.

Various heads turned toward me, he’d come in after the others rather than with them, so it didn’t seem like they realized who he was, and his voice had such an emotional crack to it he must have sounded like a stranger.

I snorted, “It’s nothing, I just promised not to tell his mother about the dirty magazine he bought.”

I recognized some of the kids in the story, and I saw relief flood the faces of the young males who promptly flocked to ‘that’ section now that they knew I wouldn’t be telling on them.

And the rest of my first day passed without incident.

The sun was descending and it was getting darker by the minute. I locked the doors when the last customer left, closing myself inside, and went behind the counter to where the two pairs of pants lay crumpled in a heap where I’d kicked them before.

I crouched down and bit my tongue while I searched the pockets for what I sought.

My prize?

A pair of wallets. Wallets stuffed with cash. I pocketed that immediately, shoving it into my purse. “Lucky me.” I thought, “I’ll buy myself a few things here before I go.”

A few dozen bento boxes, sushi platters, and some ready to eat meals and lots of sodas.

I made a list in my head, then pulled out the I.D. cards of the two twits, just like I expected, there were addresses in place, I wonder how they explained themselves to their colleagues later. ‘That must have been hilarious.’ I thought and let out a long, loud laugh as I tried to picture their confused answers.

I stowed their wallets in my purse too, put their pants under one arm, and quickly spent their money on what I’d need for my fridge and the like for the better part of the next week.

I had bags loaded down with stuff, and then with a flash, I was gone and standing in front of my door. From there, I vanished again and reappeared just inside.

I dropped my stuff on the mess of a coffee table, picked up my phone, and began to check the locations on these identification cards. I whistled. ‘Downtown? Wow, pricey.’ I thought, and unfortunately, it was also very busy.

“Great. So it’s going to be a chore.” I muttered and looked longingly at the television. I was going to marathon watch a show about a wolf goddess falling in love with a mortal human as they traveled together.

But no… I have to spend at least an hour or two on these twits. “Getting between me and my NEET time… unforgivable.” I growled and called for a car to come pick me up.

‘Oh well… maybe I can find some way to make this at least a little bit fun.’ I thought, and tried to stay positive about it as I walked back out of my apartment again.