Sir Leeroy’s socks slipped snugly over the suffering assailants snivelling snoot, causing some screaming, and squirming before they passed out.
“OK” Said Errol, you do realise how evil that is right?”
Rattanian almost felt sorry for the assassins then remembered who they were. “If they’re really working on the Grey’s payroll, then they’ve earned this punishment a thousand times over.”
“Who are these Grey Twins anyway?” Mibbet asked, she knew enough to figure out they were trouble, but not how much yet.
“According to the myth they’re two of the last out of the labs. They pretty much pull strings around the entire city, if a body washes up down here it’s usually them responsible, but they’re really good at not leaving a trace, they’ve had a long time to practice after all.”
“Great so now we’re chasing actual mythological creatures, AGAIN, must be Tuesday” Mibbet groaned. Just for once it would be nice if an ancient slumbering evil decided to take a longer nap, or screamed five more minutes, then buggered off. Why do they always insist on picking on things younger than themselves anyway?”
Rattanian was rather perturbed by this, most things didn’t hear of ancient evils and grumble about their timing, they usually screamed and ran, or fetched a torch and pitchfork wielding mob (who usually accidentally got each other far more than their designated target. That was the problem with angry mobs, they had one collective brain cell between them, and if they got too angry it went walkabouts and the mob devoured itself. In Rattropolis usually in a slightly more literal manner than anywhere else..... well except maybe Smiletown.) “Where the hell are you a Princess?” he asked worriedly.
“You’re living there, this kingdom is my turf, as for hell, well we have a kitty that rocks the fire and brimstone look so I think it’s safe to assume somebody around the neighbourhood does the whole robes and cult thing. One of these days I’ll find em, and when I do they’ll go downstairs voluntarily, because dealing with me after threatening my people? It will make the best, or worst of hell seem like a picnic in comparison.”
Rattanian found himself not doubting her words, so for now he turned his attention elsewhere. “Slinky, they said you were paying protection? How long has that been happening.”
“Always,” she explained nervously. “Nobody mentioned who the cash went to, but unless I want my customers harassed and my inn burned down I pay my fee, all these years I’ve treated it like rent.”
This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.
“Yeah but you started off with nothing Slinks, you came up from the pinch like me.”
“Which is why I’ve never missed a payment, now though? They crossed a line,They hurt my business, they came into my home, and acted like they owned the damned place. I’m not putting up with that. When you find out where they came from I’m coming with you.”
“No way, far too dangerous.”
“Did it look like I was asking? I’m coming and that’s that.”
At that Rattanian could only sigh, it was no good arguing with her when she was like this, there was no way to win. So instead he nodded and she slinked off to gear up.
“What’s the pinch? Mibbet asked, with her usual knack for asking the right thing at exactly the wrong time.
“Hoo boy, you didn’t even bother with tact did ya Princess?” Rattanian grumbled. “The city as you probably noticed has a pinch shape in the middle, that’s because we kind of bent reality into a pretzel to make the place. Buildings closer to the Wizard tower have always been considered more dangerous, and at some time a spatial fold happened. The guards didn’t like going in there because you can’t signal for backup. Basically a whole district was swallowed, and anybody who didn’t like being watched? They took to hanging around there.”
“So basically a towns worth of disgruntled rats who hate the city, sounds like a fun place” Mibbet replied, she was really starting to get the hang of this sarcasm thing under Rosalind’s masterful expertise on the subject.
“Over time things got rougher, and for rats in the pinch moving elsewhere got tricky, so more and more just stayed there. Every once in a while an old experiment slips out of the tower, and causes all sorts of trouble but waddya gonna do? Call the guard? No we take care of it ourselves.”
“I see, and now The Greys have a foothold there, and it seems an army with a grudge, think I know where they’ll be now. But we’ll wait and see what our little friend over there has to say when they wake up and go from there.
“If you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking then I really hope you’re wrong, that’s going to be nothing but trouble.”
“Well time will tell, but at this point I’m pretty sure, so you may wanna brace yourself.”
Soon enough the rat with the nicked ear woke up with a groan, then a wince, what the hell was going on? What was on his nose? It was like a dozen zombie skunks specially fed a durian and surstromming exclusive diet had wandered past his nose and let it rip, right next door to a gorgonzola factory. What the hell was this? His sinuses were on fire, and the sensation was making his eyes water. He squirmed to get free, but he was tied tight. There was no escape.
“If you want free I advise you start talking”
Nicked ear shook their head, this torture was unbearable, but he REALLY did not want to open his mouth right now (really, who could blame him for that? if you were snoot deep in one of Sir Leeroy’s socks would you want to taste it?)
The rat tried their best to pull the sock free, they would talk, anything was better than this, but not while that thing was on.
“OK on three I’m going to pull that off your snoot, and you are going to tell me where to find The Grey’s, 1,2,3.”
Suddenly he was free, it would take days to get the stench out of his nose, assuming The Grey’s didn’t kill him, but for now he was more concerned with escaping the stench.
“THEY’RE IN THE OLD TOWER” he squealed.
As Rattanian processed that, he had only one response.
“Oh bollocks.”