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Flow
Absolutes.Ch15

Absolutes.Ch15

Leomi lays her palm on the chair and starts brushing the sawdust off. She's making a small satisfied smile. I wonder whether this is the first thing she's built with her own hands but I let her enjoy the moment instead of asking.

The answer is obvious anyway, an Heiress wouldn't have the time to learn miscellaneous skills outside of battle and ruling. She has money and retainers to deal with life's problems.

“Were you lonely?” I suddenly ask.

“What do you mean?” Leomi questions, turning to me.

“Were you lonely growing up?” I press from intuition.

From what she's told me, her parents rarely had time for her. Her father had a Count's demesne to rule and had to travel while her mother went wherever the Order needed her. I doubt you can become an Exemplar by sitting around after all.

“There were plenty of people to take care of me and many of my age visited, and I do have some cousins.” Leomi shakes her head.

“How many of them were your friends?” I continue. It feels like she's deflecting, perhaps unconsciously.

“I...” Leomi blinks, her eyes growing moist.

“I'm sorry.” I hurriedly say, reaching out to her.

“No, it's fine.” Leomi tells me, swallowing her sadness as her eyes get lost in the distance. “I've known two that I can call friends.”

I take hold of her hand since she isn't responding, pulling it to me. Her palm feels cool as usual but not so soft because of the wood dust, I care little as I press it against my warm cheek.

It helps her out of her daze, her eyes flicking to me. She suddenly smiles in amusement and caresses my skin. She then pulls me closer and starts picking the wood chips she transferred to me along with those that somehow flew into my hair as we worked.

That's when I notice that she doesn't have a single bit of dust on her. She clearly paid attention not to get any on her, which was easier for her considering I insisted on doing the heavy lifting.

“How can you be so cute even when you're a mess?” Leomi complains.

“You're the same.” I reply.

“No, no I'm not.” Leomi laughs. “I just look crazy with wild hair, you turn into an insane beauty.”

I shake my head because I disagree but I don't reply, accepting the praise. It feels good to find out that I always look good in her eyes, and it doesn't surprise me that her constant suggestions about my appearance are because she prefers me when I look cute.

“Say, I'm going to need to train to learn how to take care of my hair, right?” I ask.

“On me?” Leomi questions with wide eyes that seem a little frightened, instantly catching on.

“No one else here.” I grin, reaching out to take hold of her shirt.

“W, wait, we can find a mirror!” Leomi protests.

I drag her to the chair while she playfully fights back. I have no doubt that she's reluctant, and that she could lie me down on the ground within a split second if she wanted. I love the fact that she doesn't even though she could easily make me enjoy losing.

“Where do you think we are?” I ask in a slightly mocking tone as I push down on her neck to make her sit down. “I doubt there's even a broken mirror within three days of travel on foot.”

“Please, great warrior, have mercy!” Leomi cries out, faking distress with a wide grin on her face.

“Never! Muahahaha.” I exclaim with a fake evil laugh.

I slap my hand on my thigh to get rid of the sawdust that stuck to it and run my fingers in her amazing straight black hair, finding knots that unravel with a mere touch. Leomi hangs back into the chair and closes her eyes.

“I can't believe it. This isn't hair, it's silk.” I grunt, completely jealous.

“It takes a lot of care. Yours are naturally curly and you barely need any work to look amazing, it's much more vexing.” Leomi replies with a pout. “The only reason you could think my hair are thinner is that yours assemble in strands that make you look outrageously gorgeous.”

“Kh.” I smother a mocking laugh. “We sound like two little girls.”

“Hmh.” Leomi hums. “It's good sometimes.”

I silently nod and start working on making small braids out of her hair, imagining the end result on myself and her. It should look a lot better on me, than on... I pause, having caught a glimpse of white that didn't seem to be her scalp.

I stop focusing on the strand I'm working in my fingers to seriously observe her hair. I find that the base of this strand is white, all of her hair are. There's less than a millimeter which means it's a very recent change.

“Why did you stop?” Leomi asks, looking up.

“Your hair, they're... growing white.” I stutter.

My fingers tremble as I recall the silver light that encompassed her brain and scalp the day she realized the extent of my revenge. There is no doubt in my mind that the shock she experienced is the cause behind this change.

Stories speak of people whose hair changed to white overnight from terror. I never thought I would experience this. As I feel my head spinning, Leomi bursts out of her chair and rushes into the storage room where she left her luggage.

She quickly returns with a thin round brown box with golden embroidery and a lance crest atop of it. She sits back down in the chair, looking slightly pale as she slowly opens the item to reveal a mirror on the top lid and a small painting of her parents on the lower lid.

Her father was as tall as her mother with square shoulders which weren't as broad as the Exemplar's. His eyes were light blue but slightly brighter than Vikiana's and his hair black as well.

They were young when they posed for the painting, and the two looked remarkably similar apart from their faces. While Vikiana looks hard and fierce, he had a serious and gentle air to his traits.

I focus back on Leomi whose nose is practically touching the mirror. She's examining the roots of her hair with a look of disbelief and uncertainty. I remain there, like a statue, entirely stuck about how to deal with this.

It's my fault. I don't care in the least that her hair is turning pure white but she attaches a lot of importance to her appearance. I think that the combination with her bronze skin will make her look even better, ethereal.

Still, even if the white doesn't suit her, I merely fell for her body first, her personality is what devoured my heart. I nervously walk around Leomi and kneel in front of her, trying to catch her gaze.

Leomi isn't moving at all, she's paler than she was and her hand has stopped moving, her light gray eyes no longer seem like an abyss but more like a misty sea at night. I reach out and place my palm on her left cheek to caress the bridge of her nose with my thumb.

Her gaze slowly clears out, her irises narrowing and locking onto my face. I smile nervously because that's all I can do, and it's what I should do for her, not because I feel like smiling in the least with the state she's in.

“Will you like it?” Leomi asks, her voice is raspy but deep.

“I will.” I reply without hesitation.

“Then it's okay.” Leomi says, her thin lips rising by just a notch. “Now, get back to it.”

“You sure?” I ask with a worried frown.

“Did you lie to me?” She questions in return.

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“Definitely not, I'm actually pretty eager to see how you'll look.” I shake my head.

“Then go on, double-time.” Leomi demands, leaning forward to kiss my forehead.

I nod and get back up, starting to work on braiding her hair with just a few strands. Leomi's eyes remain closed as I train, seeming lost in thought but not devastated. It takes me a good hour to make a single one, which I end up unraveling because it doesn't look very good and I prefer her hair to be free anyway.

After a long while, my stomach makes itself known with a fierce grumble that makes Leomi laugh. I swiftly reach out to her flow and seize a couple of portions to shape an air-blade... no, more like an air construct at this point because I've learned to shape it as I wish.

The two people I love the most but definitely don't trust as much as Yvonne or Cetyz, keep telling me how good I am at manipulating flow so I decide to make an experiment and entirely discard the use of a construct.

I reach out to the energy and structure it the same way I would a construct but without using a segment. I send golden streams of energy to interact with the air surrounding the scraps of wood we discarded while building the chair.

With a single portion of flow, I lift them up and stack them up. I then wrap the air around the pot of stew that Leomi cooked and make it glide to land on the pile. The energy runs out just as it lands so I use the second portion to light up a fire construct.

“I don't get how you can do this.” Leomi murmurs, clearly shocked that I didn't make use of a construct yet only needed this much energy.

“There's an unexplainable logic to it.” I reply, dazed by my own performance. “To be fair, it wouldn't work if I didn't have the construct in mind as I did this. It's just direct control, an actual air construct could do the same thing and wouldn't shatter if I lost focus.” I explain.

“But it would burn more energy overall because you would have to add a lot of instructions.” Leomi denies.

“After seeing the scope of Suxen's constructs and what she can do with them, I'm starting to think that most constructs are actually largely unstructured.” I tell her.

“That's somewhat true.” Leomi nods. “What kind of constructs does that woman have?” She asks, her head leaning back to look at me upside down.

“The most impressive, to me, is the barrier construct she made.” I tell her, only belatedly realizing that it's a lie because the effect of slowing the perception of time is much more impressive. “That barrier remained inactive and activated only when necessary. With how little flow there was available at the time, it can't have been more intensive to use than an air-blade or an armor-piercing construct. Otherwise, I don't recall any construct that can be used in battle.”

“Can it be defeated?” Leomi asks.

“I assume you're implying a head-on confrontation with similar amounts of energy used, right?” I question. She nods. “I have no idea, I only briefly interacted with it so it could go either way but I doubt that madwoman would display an inefficient construct.”

“Alright.” Leomi makes a long sigh, looking worried about the future.

It's likely that she's thinking that Cenwalh would have learned that construct from Suxen. Yet, all I can think about are her the lips she parted. I lean down and press my mouth on her upside down one, unable to resist the temptation.

“We'll be fine.” I mutter.

I've wanted to kiss her so much for so long that the desire feels ingrained in my flesh. I run my fingers over her strong cheekbone and then along her chiseled nose, worried about the calluses on my fingers but not so much I would stop.

Leomi's tongue breaches out and melds with mine, bringing an aggressive passion that startles me before I let myself go and do my best to return the bliss she makes me feel, stroking her tongue with mine.

I feel her shake and reach out with her hands to seize the back of my head. She pulls me in, pressing her mouth hard against mine, showing desperation akin to mine. I feel my nipple grow erect and a blazing heat spreading inside my chest.

The soft, wet, sensation of her lips and tongue muddle my thoughts enough that I fail to react when Leomi lets go of my head and gets up without breaking the kiss, spinning and kicking the chair to push me back against a wall.

“Umph.” I grunt as I hit the wall and a stone pokes into my back.

Her left hand gently falls on my right breast while her left slowly runs up my thigh, making me shiver as it reaches for its goal. Her slender but powerful fingers stop over my ass and clench strongly to seize the object of her passion while pushing herself against me.

My body stiffens like steel, imprisoning the craving beast inside my chest. Once again, I feel an acute pain spreading out from where her hands took possession of me. My flesh feels agonizingly fragile, febrile.

“Stop.” I whisper, my hand reaching out.

My palm lands on her left breast. It is no accident that this is what I found or that I start caressing her hard nipple through her shirt. No matter how much I suffer in her hands, it excites me. Now is no different, I'm so wet she could feel it if she pushed her knee between my thighs, hard.

Yet, she freezes. Her reaction is unlike mine, while my muscles turn hard like rock, hers is like water gradually turning to ice. Her body turns solid against mine, her fingers stop moving, locked in their last position like claws around my breast and ass.

We then very slowly melt away from one another, breaking our embrace and kiss. Her cheeks are red, she's panting. I likely am too... I am. The only issue is our uncooperative bodies, or more precisely, the scars we inflicted on each other's minds.

It becomes apparent to me that she's unlikely to have heard when I told her to stop. She's the sort of screwed up woman, perfect for me, who wants me so much she'll forget everything else, even me, but she would never miss my body's negative reaction, even if she might try to break through it.

I lean against the wall, realizing that my mind is in turmoil and that my thoughts are almost disconnected. Leomi walks back and drops into the chair before crossing her legs, looking like she ran out of air five minutes ago with her rapid breaths.

“Arrange, yourself... please.” Leomi articulates each word with difficulty.

I swiftly set my disheveled clothes straight and even run my fingers in my hairs, very much aware that she's restraining herself from jumping me. I still can't believe we got her so good, that she can love us this much in spite of what I did.

What do you mean? Can't you tell how much she wants us, how hard it is for her to stop? I feel no need to respond to Elizabeth, she knows I know. I do know we know. I hear an insane bout of laughter resound inside my head.

“You taking care of me, was torture plenty.” Leomi utters, apparently explaining her demand for me to straighten my clothes. “That kiss...” She lets her voice trail off as she firmly closing her eyes, shivering from head to toe. “I'm, going to, need a while.”

“Me, too.” I respond, the two words feel like my limit.

If I was the one who couldn't hold on, would I have been able to stop? I shiver at the thought. Thankfully, I wouldn't be able to overpower her. Speak for yourself. No false pretense, Liz. Fine.

“No touching for the rest of the evening.” Leomi tells me.

“Deal.” I mutter. “We eat and go to sleep.”

“Tonight, don't join me if I have a nightmare.” Leomi says, sounding almost pleading. “I need to get through those, for you... no, for me.” She explains.

“Okay.” I whisper.

It goes without saying that if either one of us seeks some release, we cannot do it anywhere near the other. But it doesn't feel like she'll do that and I have no intention of doing so.

My hope is that the fact we can't resolve the intense sexual tension between us for now will make it harder to get into a fight when we're not all cuddly and loving towards each other in the days to come.

An acrid smell of arousal floats in the air, mixing with that of the stew. I press my thighs together, using my underwear to sponge off the liquid permeating my sex before it gets too uncomfortable. Yet, it is far from enough.

I stiffly walk past Leomi and open the window's flaps without a word before picking up a change of clothes and stepping outside. I half-run to the well and crazily wrap the rope around my forearm to quickly lift a bucket of water up.

I strip naked, welcoming the harsh winter wind because it shatters the seemingly bottomless pit of desire calling for Leomi to fill it. It brings me back days past when it was the only goal I had left for myself.

I drip my underwear in the cold water and wipe my intimacy with it, and then my body. The freezing temperature helps me cool down, awaken, push away the madness Leomi and I share when it comes to the physical desires that could threaten our still delicate love if we let it loose.

I swiftly dress back up and rush inside, finding Leomi still sitting with her legs crossed. Now that I'm a bit more clearheaded, she looks somewhat pitiful. It makes me want to rush up and torment her a little. I firmly push that marvelous idea aside.

“I left a bucket of water outside, wash up while I serve the food. It helps a lot.” I tell her from a distance.

Leomi nods and slowly gets up. She affects a pause before turning around and making her way to the storeroom to get her own change of clothes. She then heads outside with a graceful, cat-like, gait.

I stare, utterly stricken by her ability to put on a show of strength. No, at this point, it isn't a show but sheer willpower, and a stubbornness to win. I turn to the fire and pick up the spatula to start stirring the stew.

I can't help but grin pridefully as I hear sounds of splashing water outside, yet my smile fades within moments as I recall exactly why we couldn't... no, why we didn't go any further. I spend a few minutes pushing away my worries, waiting for her to return.

“Did, did we break each other?” I ask with a trembling voice when I hear the front door creak open, unable to find the courage to turn around and look her in the eyes. In the case where she responds in the positive, it would make it more real if we were facing each other.

“No, there's progress, you took a bit longer to turn unresponsive.” Leomi denies instantly. She's clearly been having the same thoughts.

“Tell me the truth, is it just because of what I did?” I ask, controlling my voice to sound as normal as possible so as not to influence her answer and not directly mentioning the parasite.

“It isn't only that, no.” Leomi replies. I hear her walk across the room and then sit down, on the log if I go by the sound. “Your... revenge. That night and the following morning, they flash back in my mind from time to time. The thought you died, the smile you made.”

“It happens when we kiss?” I question, feeling my guts twisting.

“No.” Leomi answers.

When I touch you.