We all agreed it was for the better to take Wren back to her parents. She couldn’t give us an address but said she was familiar with the area and that our destination was pretty close by. She must’ve been embarrassed about not remembering her number and street because she refused to elaborate on our directions.
She simply set up at the front of our party and we waddled after her like ducklings. It gave us all time for me to get everyone up to date on everything that was going on. Well, not everything. Whatever was happening between Axel and I was not something I was willing to divulge. Eugh, whatever that was.
Mostly because I didn’t really know what it was. What had the two of us settled on in the end before Phoenix’s interruption, before we’d fallen asleep? Axel was waiting on my answer, and I was waiting on the bravery to risk everything.
The numbness of my arms, the warmth on the front of my body, and the scent of citrus when we’d been shocked awake briefly touched on the back of my mind, but I pushed the memory away. Thinking about how it’d been me doing the spooning last night would not help clarify things.
Instead, as I began to explain all I had discovered about attributes and abilities, I realised only Wren and Axel really needed the information considering that Tam had Mumma, and Gigi had whoever xe had and Jye’s system was pretty much inoperable by standard conventions. That said, being able to inform everyone about it gave me further motivation to delve into the most recent reveals. It also helped distract me from thinking about what we were walking away from and toward.
While Wren led us wherever we were going, which she had described several times as “not far now,” we passed a local library, and I remembered fondly my trips to the one closest to me. It was pretty much the only other time I had left our apartment unless for necessities or to get away from Axel’s parties. When life had been simpler. I remarked aloud that I should’ve visited mine more often. I hoped the librarians were all doing fine.
My random comment led to us speaking about what a normal day had been like for us before the Gates had appeared and the beginning of the Deities’ event. I was glad for it because it helped me get to know everyone just that little bit better. It was something I was working toward.
Jye was the first to volunteer details about their day-to-day, and as I listened I loaded up my window and thought about the Nexus.
They explained that they usually had an early wake-up, 5am or so, a breakfast of seven boiled eggs and a protein smoothie, went to lead some clients in PT in their gym, had a lunch of a whole roast chicken, ran a couple HIIT sessions, and then fucked off home and got high for the rest of the day while switching on anime and ordering in “like two to seven burritos from Zambrero.”
I listened with a humouring smile, but in hindsight, I probably could’ve guessed that was their daily routine. Still the amount of food they ate was positively bizarre. I couldn’t eat a whole roast chicken in a full day, let alone for a single lunch. Had we been starving Jye? I didn’t notice any difference in their muscular physique, but in the long run it might have negative consequences.
I made a mental note to start differentiating meal rations. Different people required different things. That was like a fundamental truth. What was it… Equity over equality. Though they did have all those protein powders stored away, so maybe they'd be okay? Nutrition wasn't exactly my expertise. The most I knew was that sugar was… bad?
As Jye went on to detail that they'd finally gotten around to watching Akame ga Kill!, which they said they hadn't finished but they were looking forward to the ending, if they ever could. They droned on about how they believed Esdeath and Tatsumi were totally endgame, and I focused on my menu expanding to show that Nexus was greyed out.
I frowned. It had said it was available after we’d completed the Dungeon.
Did that mean it was only available after a Dungeon clear?
Fuck.
All right, I’d have to come back to that later, after we took Wren home, and we started grinding for real. Because that’s what it would be. Us trying to clear Dungeons at rates that would make anyone else think we were insane. We had to compensate for Jye. There was no other option. Well. There was but it wasn’t one I would ever entertain.
Though maybe there was a smarter way to go about it. Since I’d been right all along about us being entertainment… Then maybe what the Deities really wanted was exactly what Nabu had explained. A performance. Drama, comedy, action, and adventure, perhaps even horror.
Wait.
It was so obvious now that I thought about it. If everything we were going through was meant to captivate our audience, then The Dungeons clearly leaned towards a particular genre. Nabu’s had been a mythological remake, with aspirations to be an epic, though written so poorly it would’ve bombed in the box office. From the sounds of the CBD Dungeon, it was a monster take on survival ala The Revenant. Putting those frameworks into mind, it was clear all we needed to do was create drama and form a narrative to get the best results.
It was actually kind of surprising that a lifetime of consuming story almost gave me an advantage. I’d been training my whole life to know what made something worth watching.
Tam told us her daily life was none of our business and that if we ever asked again, she’d lie. Not much of a shock, but I was glad for her warning. It felt like she was warming up to us. A fortnight ago, she would’ve just flat out lied and taken us for a ride. Based on what I knew about her, I imagined her normal routine was probably doing whatever she did for work and then spending the evening with her wife. It wouldn’t have been a bad life. I wondered where her wife was now. There was no point in asking. She would never tell me.
Gigi explained xir normal day as much as xe was capable but kept on coming to words that simply had no translation in English. After a while, xe gave up, summarising xir day into simply: “I wake, I work, I eat, I play, I sleep.” It gave absolutely no insight into xem on a whole. Though based on some of xir initial attempts, I think I found out that at one point Gigi had multiple partners. No one else had commented on that so it was possible I’d misheard. I wondered what Gigi’s original Linnikian appearance was like. Maybe xe was a total heart throb to xir people.
In the silence that followed, I explained my own average routine and halfway through realised how bland it sounded. Had I been truly living like that? I'm surprised no one had tried slapping me out of it. Did my parents really think I was happy? My friends? Given the boring nature of what I spoke about, no one had follow up questions, not even Wren. Axel nodded along as I spoke, which wasn’t surprising. He knew what I’d been like. And he apparently loved me for it? Simply unbelievable.
When it came to Axel’s turn to share since I was fairly familiar with it, I blanked it out, and instead focused on the Deity Commentary.
Purchase access to applicable Dungeon 16 Deity Commentary Log for 100 credits? Accept | Reject
I sighed. Well, I hadn’t used any more since the barbecue so maybe this was a good cause. Everything new that appeared that we could use and understand was an advantage against others. I accepted and watched my credits go down the drain. 323 credits remaining. Oof.
Something resembling an empty messenger app expanded. Timestamps marked the starting and end times. Was this… the fucking stream chat? Were we privy to the commentary of Deities watching us in our trials?
I scrolled back as far as it would let me go and was surprised to see so many exchanges. Checking the timestamps attached, it looked as though they had occurred just after we entered the Dungeon, and then throughout until we’d left. I guess that’s where the “applicable” part came in. It was only the part of the chat that was relevant to us.
A frame of text faster than a millisecond flashed. I was barely able to parse that it said “translating and localising” before it was gone. That was especially useful to know because as I started reading I found it hard to reconcile beings that could smite me talking as they did. That said, Nabu had spoken in a relatively modern albeit nervous way.
Scrolling, I was thankful that large gaps of inactivity looked to be condensed for readability.
{Anon123} That was quick. Mod, can we lock onto these guys for a bit?
{Anon123} Thanks!
{Anon123} Can we switch?
{Anon123} Never mind, that’s less interesting. Cycle back.
{Hisss} Wait!
{Hisss} Ah, fuck it. Follow these ones. Maybe they’ll give us some actual action!
{Anon123} This is not the Dungeon for that, Hisss.
—
{Anon123} Wow. Friendly fire this early.
{Hisss} Hope it dies.
{Anon123} Oh, shit, I think I recognise that small one. It was in 11.
{Hisss} Damnit. I hate healers. They ruin all the tension.
{Hisss} Yaaaaawnnn. Do all these things do is talk?
{Hisss} Cycle, Mod.
{Hisss} THIS IS SO BORING. GO BACK.
{Hisss} COME ON. JUST DO SOMETHING.
{Anon123} Calm down, Hisss. It’s called character development.
{Hisss} I just want them to kill each other. Is that so much to ask?
{Hisss} This Dungeon sucks.
—
{Hisss} Check this out.
{Anon123} No one’s stupid enough to fall for that. You’re throwing away belief.
{Hisss} Euuugh, but this is boring! I want chaos!!! Or death! OR BOTH.
{Anon123} You might need to go elsewhere, Hisss. I’ve heard 1 has some pretty interesting stuff happening. Oh, lol. I told you. They rejected it.
{Hisss} Damnit. That yellow headed one pisses me off. How’d it know?
{Anon123} Any idiot would figure it out.
{Hisss} EUGH. I’m out of here.
{Anon123} Byyyye.
{Mumma} No, wait, stick around! Things are about to get good!
{Anon123} Oooh, what do you know, Mumma?
MODERATOR REMINDER: All Commentary may be viewed by players, in real time or otherwise. Please ensure that your commentary does not involve incoming Dungeon events, backseat directing, or additional information currently unavailable to players. Breaking this rule will result in a permanent ban. One more warning will be provided before action will be taken.
{Anon123} Lol. You made the Mod angry.
{Mumma} Just stay in this Dungeon.
—
{Anon123} Yikes. The very tiny small beast yours, Mumma?
{Anon123} Mumma, you still there?
{Anon123} Oh. Lol. Clutch save. Congrats on the new party.
{Mumma} Shut the fuck up, Anon123.
—
{Anon123} Well, that was stupid.
{Anon123} Oh. Okay. That balanced out the wall trap idiocy.
{Anon123} What was the point in that fireball?
{Anon123} Can we cycle to— Nah, those others aren’t worth watching.
{Anon123} REALLY, ADDING ANOTHER??? I’m beginning to regret my donation.
—
{Anon123} Oh shit, oh shit. Are we finally—
{Anon123} CLOSE THE DISTANCE. Come on!!! What the fuck is that big one doing? GET IN THERE.
{Mumma} Look at my baby. She’s so smart.
{Hisss} I’m back, 1 got a first clear. Absolutely brutal. So many died. I loved it. What did I miss???
{Anon123} The old one group finally found the one who shit on your request.
If you spot this story on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.
MODERATOR REMINDER: All Commentary may be viewed by players, in real time or otherwise. Please ensure that your commentary does not involve incoming Dungeon events, backseat directing, or additional information currently unavailable to players. Breaking this rule will result in a permanent ban. This is the last warning before action will be taken.
{Anon123} Ah, shit, sorry. Forgot.
{Hisss} YESSS, finally, I get to watch something die here.
{Mumma} Not if my baby kills whoever is attacking first!
{Hisss} Who the fuck are you?
{Mumma} None of your business.
{Anon123} Sponsor.
{Hisss} LOL. For one in these groups??? What a waste of belief.
{Anon123} You’re one to talk.
{Hisss} Fuck it, this commentary is toxic. Plus this fight is boring. And it looks like the old archer is going to lose anyway since the cat’s sneaking up on him.
HISSS has been permanently banned from Dungeon 16 Deity Commentary.
{Anon123} Lol.
{Mumma} Lol.
—-
{Mumma} Anon123, who are you?
{Anon123} No one important. You?
{Mumma} Same.
{Anon123} So you’re a liar like your pet.
{Mumma} Don’t start.
{Anon123} No, no, no. That wasn’t an insult. I think I like this party.
{Mumma} They’re quite interesting, aren’t they?
{Anon123} Interesting is one word I’d use, yeah.
—
{South Wind} Someone told me there was some hot shit happening in here.
{Anon123} Welcome, Wind! Some players are in the Challenge now. Looks like something is gonna go down.
{South Wind} Oh, I don’t care about that kind of action.
{Anon123} ?
{South Wind} A deity came into the Dungeon I was watching screaming about how they got banned and that all the players do in this Dungeon is talk and flirt. So, like, what’s the tea?
{Mumma} The yellow headed one and the party leader. They’re… something. My baby thinks they are, at least.
{Anon123} That’s a fair description.
{South Wind} What does that even mean?
{Anon123} *shrugs*
{South Wind} Damnit. Colour me intrigued.
—
{South Wind} ARE YOU KIDDING ME? DID YOU SEE THAT? IT JUST PICKED UP THE OTHER ONE AND SALKDJLKJASD. BRB. I GOTTA GO GET MY FRIENDS. FUCK. They’re gonna eat this shit UP.
{Anon123} See you soon, Wind.
{Hissss} THIS DUNGEON IS THE FUCKING WORST.
APOPHIS has been permanently banned from all Dungeon Commentaries.
{Anon123} Get doxed, idiot.
{Mumma} Oh, look, they found the others. These spawn points are a little… Hmmm. The little one is unfortunate.
—
{Anon123} What do you think the plan is?
{Mumma} I don’t care. My baby isn’t there.
{Anon123} So you’re one of those kinds of sponsors.
{Mumma} You’re so judgemental, Anon123.
{Anon123} No judgement. Just… observation.
{Anon123} Oh shit, look at them go! YES, RUN! JUMP~
{Anon123} Wow. Not what I would’ve… But okay.
{Anon123} Yikes.
{Anon123} That was easy. Go for the kill.
{Anon123} PARTY LEADER STEPPING UP, LETS GOOOOOOO!!!
{Anon123} Always eating my words here.
{Mumma} Wait. WAIT.
{Anon123} Oh, fuck.
{South Wind} Wait, what’s happening? Why’s there two of the yellows? Which one is it?
{Anon123} Left one…?
{Mumma} The right!
{Anon123} It’s— oh, shit. Damn. That’s… Rip.
{Mumma} Where’s my baby, though?
{South Wind} DID YOU SEE THAT???
{Peach Bite} You were NOT lying, Wind!!! This shit is insane. They were mates?
{South Wind} WORSE! They’re “something”!
{Peach Bite} It just died for the— IT’S ALIVE.
{South Wind} Look how tenderly it’s holding the other. Fuck. FUCK.
{Sky Shine} AYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. What’s going on???
{Anon123} Is it just me or is the vibe in here getting weird?
{Mumma} Not just you, but I’m not against it.
{South Wind} Did I tell you, or did I tell you?
{Peach Bite} You know I’m more of a fan of doomed toxic stuff. But this. Chef’s kiss~ The terror on its face… Mmm-mmm.
{Sky Shine} And there’s room for development!!!
{South Wind} I cannot wait!
{Mumma} Oh, there’s my baby! Good girl! Nice work!
{Sky Shine} I’m getting heavy hints of doomed toxic from your pet, Mumma.
{Mumma} Don’t say that!
{Peach Bite} What’s this group, by the way? I wanna add them to my favourites.
{Anon123} Just Friends, Peach.
{South Wind} Wow.
{Sky Shine} Denial, much?
{Peach Bite} Added.
—
{South Wind} Wait, wait, the two are talking. Is this actually…
{Sky Shine} NOOOOOOOOOOO WAY. DID IT JUST—
{Peach Bite} They’re… I’m gonna die, literally. That’s so sweet.
{South Wind} “Every life”? I’ll be damned. It’s a romantic.
{Sky Shine} I’m so glad we got here in time for this. Thanks for the tip, Wind.
{Peach Bite} This is so lovely. I hope one of them dies.
{South Wind} Noooo, Peach, I want a happy ending. Orrrrr… maybe they could die in each other’s arms. That’d be so sweeeeet.
{Sky Shine} That’d be cute!
{Peach Bite} That’d work too, eheheh~
—
{South Wind} They’re both blushing. This is so adorable. ///UWU///
{Peach Bite} This shit’s gonna be looping in my head for the rest of the event, even after they die.
{Sky Shine} I kinda want them to win, actually.
{Anon123} They’re doing okay. They might win.
{Peach Bite} Please, have you seen some of the others? They’re doomed. And that’s delicious!
{Mumma} My baby’s done it. Dungeon’s cleared.
{Anon123} That was actually pretty fun to watch. Slow start though.
{South Wind} I guess I’ll be seeing you all around.
{Peach Bite} See you later, Wind, Sky! And nice to meet you, Anon, and Mumma!
{Sky Shine} Tee-hee! You better believe I’m joining the next Dungeon Just Friends are in. I need resolution!
{Anon123} I hope Nabu doesn’t pick the one I want.
{Mumma} You’re gonna sponsor?
{Anon123} I wasn’t originally. But there’s something about one of them…
MODERATOR NOTICE: Dungeon Clear has been achieved. Challenge reset in progress. Requests for the party that has cleared the Dungeon will no longer be processed.
{Anon123} See you later, Mumma. Thanks, Mod!
{Mumma} Bye, Anon.
I stumbled over a rock in the road, so absorbed in the chat that I hadn’t even paid attention to our passing surroundings.
What the fuck was this?
The only sensible, active Deity watching us had been Anon123 and nothing they said explained who they were. Hisss had been revealed to be Apophis, which made sense. God of chaos and all that. I’m surprised he lasted as long as he had with how orderly the event was. And then there was that last bit from Anon123. Which of our party did they want to sponsor? How did they sponsor us outside of a Dungeon? I’d ask Tam, but she’d never explain. Maybe I could ask Gigi now our censorships had been lifted?
My mind returned to the way the Deities had requested to cycle between players. Did the Mods control what the viewing Deities could see? I’d been assuming they had a sort of omniscient view of our struggles, but I guess that time with the exploding wall had pretty much proved that their vision was limited to a certain extent. My sense of pride smarted at Anon123’s words regarding that trap: “Well, that was stupid.” Yeah, well, if I was being honest, our approach hadn’t been the smartest.
Still, from the sounds of chat, we needed some way of forcing the Mod to keep us front and centre, if we wanted the best XP results and belief given to our sponsors. It had just been thanks to Anon123’s random curiosity that we’d gotten the chance to shine this time. Though the kind of attention they’d attracted wasn’t exactly what I’d called positive.
It was downright nauseating.
That they’d listened in on everything between us…
And to add to that, the three Deities commenting on Axel’s and my relationship had been reprehensibly detached. They wanted one of us to die? For us to die in each other’s arms? It was fucked up. “Doomed toxic stuff” was okay in fiction, and had never been my particular cup of tea, but in real life… The idea of Axel dying in my arms made me feel wobbly because it had almost happened and if it had, I think a part of me would’ve died along with him.
Okay.
So maybe they weren’t so wrong about us being “something” before anything had even happened.
That said, if that romance and tragedy was what they wanted, if that got Deities talking, watching, the Mod focusing on us… Maybe we should play that up?
We could Katniss and Peeta the shit out of this.
It could increase our XP gain, and we needed every advantage we could get.
However, the idea left a bad taste in my mouth, especially with how heavily I disliked Sky Shine, South Wind, and Peach Bite and the way they acted in chat. They reminded me of why I never interacted in fandoms. I’d gotten chewed out when quite young by someone like them and had sworn to never ever glance in the direction of any fandom ever again. It was probably for the better.
And then there was Mumma. She had acted completely different to how I pictured her since she was Tam’s sponsor. In fact, she treated Tam like… a child. I guess that made sense considering her handle, but whenever Tam spoke of her, I’d been imagining something like a biblically accurate angel crossed with the Hulk. Instead, she just seemed like a proud mother invested in her child’s progress, perhaps something closer to a soccer mum.
I didn’t know how to make heads or tails of it.
Through that all, there was one thing from the chat that intrigued me the most: the Mod’s reminder about the content being available to players. It’d said “real time or otherwise.”
While it was good to see how our performance in Nabu’s Dungeon had been received after the fact, being able to read it when it was being updated would be incredibly useful. We could react to feedback on the spot. After all, the better we performed, the more experience we received and the more belief our sponsors received which in turn helped us too. However, considering that the Deities couldn’t spoil anything for us was something else to consider.
“Hey, isn’t that right?” Axel said, looking at me.
“Sure,” I replied without hesitation.
He’d finally finished his day-to-day, and I’d not been paying any attention
The others all snickered.
At my confused expression, Jye said, “He literally said you would say yes, regardless of what he asked.”
Scowling, I questioned, “And what did I agree with?”
Tam grinned. “He said, ‘I bet Lee’s not even listening.’”
I fucking hated Axel.
“I’ll have you know, I’ve been reading the Deity Commentary for Dungeon 16.”
This earned me some looks and I gave them the low down, summarising all I'd read and giving them the main points of interest I'd garnered which turned out to take me quite some time. For once I was glad for Wren’s ever inaccurate “We’re close now!” comments.
When I finished, Jye huffed. “Pity about Apophis. Could’ve been a damn good sponsor, man. Managing to get back into a chat after being banned must mean he had connections. Plus, that name is pretty weighty in regards to mythology.”
I didn’t disagree.
“Apophis can truly be so stupid. So much belief and so little nuance. He embarrasses himself,” Gigi said, shaking xir head. “Surely, he will regret this in the future to come.”
My brows met in worry. “You’re speaking like you know him.”
The Linnikian nodded. “I do.”
Everyone’s eyes fell onto xem.
“You do?” I echoed weakly.
Xe nodded again. “Of course. He was my sponsor when I got my wish.”
Well. That at least explained why he kept coming back to the Dungeon 16’s Commentary even despite how much he hated Nabu’s work. Apophis had been checking up on and watching over Gigi. Nabu had said that some sponsors grew too fond of their players. Why hadn’t Apophis asked the Mod to switch the focus to Gigi more often though?
“And you’re… on good terms?” I asked.
Gigi made a face. “I am unsure.”
“Start talking,” Axel demanded.
“If that is what you wish.” Gigi took a breath. It was clear this was tied to something the non-human felt was shameful so I wasn’t confident how much xe would reveal. “Once my wish was granted, Apophis’s sponsorship was completed, but we remained cordial. However, I had believed my current participation in your event to have soured our connection. He would not speak to me before I joined.”
“How do you keep a cordial relationship with a god?” I queried, genuinely curious.
“You must match their desires.”
The words floated meaningless in the air between the party for a moment. As if struck by lightning, the four remaining adults in the party came to a sharp understanding. I was shocked into silence, my mouth half open in bafflement. However, Tam’s brows shot up in surprised and scandalised delight.
“You goddamn dog, Gigi.” She slapped a hand over xir back. “Well, I’ll be. I never would’ve thought it of you.” With a grin, she asked, “What’s it like? With a god?”
Gigi’s thin brows furrowed, and xe appeared to think deeply. Xir mouth began to open, but I flung up my hand to halt xem midword.
“Hey! Wren is here, you know. She’s like ten.”
“If that’s the problem, I’m not ten!” the girl replied, eyes wide. Huh. Damn, I guess I’d been projecting Chrissie onto her all along without knowing it. Wren continued with, “What’s what like with a god?”
“Nothing!” I said. “And it doesn’t matter if you’re nine, ten, or eleven, there’s some topics of conversation that you shouldn’t be hearing yet.”
After a moment of consideration, and no one else in the party commenting though she sought their support with pleading eyes, she pouted. “If you say so. Well. We’re here.” She flourished her hands to the left side of the road.
I realised we hadn’t had time to hear Wren’s daily routine during our walk, but as I stared at the building she was pointing to, I suddenly understood why. She’d intentionally not told us. There appeared to be a lot she’d chosen not to share. My stomach lurched.
“Wren… What is this?”
“This is where I’m from.”
Behind her was the Royal Brisbane and Women’s Hospital.