Once the door sealed, I expected one of us to get cold feet, probably me. I also expected a passionate eruption like the other night. Instead of any of that, Allison took my hand and pressed hers against it. We moved over to the bed and plopped down.

My heart did thud a little more than usual. We scooted back to the pillows. They smelled fresh. We looked at one another. I could’ve asked if this was Allison’s first but I knew that Allison had enough experiences for a few good stories. But none of those experiences was quite like this.

I slipped my hand over her smooth arm, feeling velvety warmth cloaked in the cool of the room. Goosebumps followed for her. I asked, “Is your skin still sensitive?”

She nodded shyly but said, “I think I’m getting used to it though.” I ventured further, moving cautiously, conscious of when it seemed like something went beyond mere sensitivity. She reached to touch back but I told her, “You first.”

In every motion and intent, I focused on gentleness, on care. So much of what I knew growing up was blunt and harsh, I wanted to bend all my softer feelings towards Allison. I had a plan.

I took a long time to explore her body. It seemed to put her into a relaxed state like a massage. Only once I’d gone over her regular skin did I seek out her special areas and only then with roundabout touches.

I could tell she was enjoying it and she still had all her clothes on. When it came time for clothes, I used the removal as another means of tracing her skin.

Her chest was a place I exercised special restraint. She may not have had the “angel cakes” of an anime form but I found the whole form that rested against her to be uniquely beautiful. By that time, I’d gone from touching to more purposeful teasing but Allison’s response didn’t spike. Instead, it looked like she was climbing a mountain bit by bit. She moved to kiss me and pull me close. I let her as she returned a faint trace of my neck. I kept my hands slowly searching their way across her.

Soon, I’d finished undressing her. I thought that I could only feel visual ecstasy from a Kinrae form. But looking down at Allison, with her eyes half-shut and joyful contentment on her face, I felt bliss shared in her presence.

I saved the most exposed part of her for last. Aubrey had taught me a few things. I worked more intimately than by touch alone. I kissed her delicately. I experienced her and she felt the best of it.

When the build-up reached its peak, it did so for Allison several times over. I’d brought her across that mountain and over several surrounding hills. Words left her. I lived through the sensations expressed in her body. When the ebb finally arrived, with slow pants and drying sweat, Allison stared at me for several long moments before she found the words to say, “I have the…best boyfriend ever! To heck with pulsate settings. I felt like I was on pulsate for half an hour and it just got better and better. That didn’t even feel real! It was like something you share online and everyone thinks it’s bull…”

I quipped, “Hope anything that comes next doesn’t disappoint.”

She giggled. “You could use cold cucumbers and I still wouldn’t be disappointed after that round. And I do feel quite motivated to make things a little more fun on your end.” Her hands traced my pants.

I let her slip off my clothes. Although my skin didn’t react as sharply, as she teased my patches of body fuzz, it was still nice. And it got even nicer when I was sharing bare skin with her. It was like a plunge off the deep end of a pool. But, instead of the fear, serenity swallowed me and that moment slipped naturally into the next.

I remembered every moment that followed despite how ethereal it seemed. Some things were tinged by a desire to better know what Allison was feeling, wondering if it all would be nicer if I slipped that device on and let Corlie in on the fun. I proposed this idea to Allison. She pressed her head against my back and told me, “It’s up to you.”

Before that, I let Allison know me in all the ways I could offer and she let me feel the same. I hung onto each romantic note of our contact. It was wonderful. Like music. I offered up a quiet melody but, through Allison, an entire orchestra accompanied us.

When the composition drew to its conclusion, we allowed each other a final gasp of frantic feeling, like that other night, before the crescendo blasted and I really hoped that the walls were thick enough.

We clung together in bed, under the covers, our warmth touching without boundaries. To just press, skin to skin, felt casual compared to what we’d done. Smiling with a glossy shimmer across her cheeks and her hair matted in the sexiest way, Allison glanced across the room and gave a quick gasp followed by a giggle.

When I asked her what was wrong, she answered, “I didn’t hide my plushies. Poor things are going to have so many questions later.” I joined in with a laugh and an apology to the room.

It felt so warm and pleasant under the covers with Allison. She gently stroked my hair like she had before. I kissed her softly between strokes. I loved Allison. I was so afraid that passing this threshold would break something or harm that love. It was all I’d known before: Mistakes and hurt. But it had been so perfect even though I’d been giving more pleasure than I took in.

We’d done everything together. We had passed every bridge. And yet the world hadn’t collapsed around me. I was happy in this moment, together with Allison.

She asked me if I wanted to “change things up”. I glanced at the device. I could. But the composition of the two of us together had flowed so fluidly and concluded just how I wanted, that to go any further would just be repetition. I told her, “Next time, especially once I can clear some concerns about the devices.”

Allison nodded with understanding. After switching the covers to something fresh, we watched a theater piece together on Allison’s small but bright TV. Our hands stretched between one another from time to time but the action was over.

After the viewing, it was getting late and there would be classes and work in the morning. Allison expressed giddy ideas about what she might be able to do in classes (but especially at work), but still swearing that while playful, she would be very careful about who saw her change. Ideas of partial and blended changes swirled about.

She showed me a shift close enough to her male self but girly enough to draw surprised glances. Watching her shift filled me with relief because she didn’t seem to have any lasting physical consequences as a man despite the fact it was just us and our bare skin.

I kissed Allison no matter how he or she looked. Eventually, we unlocked the door and peered out to see if anyone was around. Clayton and Malcolm had settled in to watch an old action flick. Shifting back into full-girl mode, Allison blurted out, “WE HAD FANTASTIC SEX!”

This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

So much for being covert. Clayton and Malcolm barely looked up from the movie and the response from Malcolm was, “Right.” Clayton nodded. Either they didn’t believe us or they believed Allison all too well. We shrugged as we slipped back down the hallway. We shared a shower but all the other stuff was over aside from a careful washing of Allison’s still-sensitive back and trying not to step on each other’s feet. We sang bits of music to each other. Allison knew quite a few by R.E.M. She had to switch back to her male voice for parts and she apologized for being “out of tune” but it was beautiful.

We decided to spend the night in Allison’s bedroom. I cuddled up to her under the sheets, my front to her back. She clutched my hands and we both drifted off to sleep.

Sleep was not a transition but more like a click inside my head. With Allison, then I was somewhere else. It had to be a dream because I had a sense of myself with memories of Allison still there like phantoms. I was lying down, as though I’d been sleeping in the dream too.

The walls were quite nice. I could discern vivid, lavender details and ornamentation on them. There was a street nearby. I could hear the cars. Maybe some sort of train as well? Too hard to sense. Looking down, I could tell I was me, or as close as I could figure. I couldn’t move but I wasn’t restrained. I just couldn’t move.

Perhaps this was one of those night terror dreams where I was half-awake. I remembered a dream I had where I thought I was still on a couch and it was like my voice was so tiny nothing came out.

The place I lay was fancy and it shifted beneath me like ripples on the sea. I waited for something to happen. Eventually, I heard words, muffled and loud, ripple around like sounds from the old PA system at school. This was followed by a voice from somewhere I didn’t know, maybe inside my head, which said, “Sleep.”

*****

I slipped my shirt off from last night and put on the new shirt from my dresser. It was one of my favorites. I put down the collar and sighed before cracking my neck. I glanced at my bed.

My phone was on there with the back removed and the battery pulled out. I frowned. I had to have pulled it out. But, for some reason, I couldn’t remember when I’d done that. Probably last night. I flexed my hands a few times. Some sort of muscle memory. I’d done it. Weird. I was probably still out of it from waking up not long ago.

But yeah, I’d woken up. In Allison’s bed. I had to be out of it. I didn’t remember getting up. I’d gotten good sleep though. But then my uncle always had trouble waking me up when I first lived with him. An uninterrupted night without fear? I could’ve slept an entire day.

Trying to shake the sleepiness from my thoughts, I put on the rest of my clothes and made my way into the hallway. Allison was out of her room and already in the kitchen. She had some things ready. I smiled at her and gave her a kiss on the forehead.

Then she asked me, “So, what did you decide on?” She kept her spatula raised in the air and added, “Remember, exclusivity…”

Only I didn’t remember. It was fairly easy to guess she meant breakfast. I told her to surprise me but to focus on “something like French toast.” She nodded quickly and went to work.

The lingering drowsiness had sapped the beginning of my morning. I relayed this to Allison and she noted, “You seemed alert a few minutes ago. Aww…did you get tired out from everything last night?” I blushed and she told me that she’d asked about my dreams.

I reflected. There were no dreams I could remember. She said I’d told her that when I woke up. I had no recollection of that conversation. I rubbed my eyes. Thinking hard about it didn’t help. At least today would be an easy day. Once I put my phone back together, I could call Uncle Nolan and talk about a few things. I was sure he would be supportive. And then the paper was coming up.

I didn’t feel eager for it. I wanted to grab the nearest Kinrae and tell them to give me a straight answer about what they were up to. Of course, so did everyone. A single class felt small by comparison. I remembered that old sci-fi movie where the guy yells, “They’re already here! You’re next!” in the middle of a street. And Allison remembered the name of it.

I stretched. I could go that route. There were definitely enough worrisome things. Hopefully my weird blackout this morning wasn’t one of them. Fortunately, it was fading. More and more I could see Allison asking me about breakfast. I could see myself going to my room and the phone. I could imagine that it had locked up and I pulled the battery but I was less sure about that.

I resolved not to bother Allison with it. She looked so happy as she went about breakfast that I didn’t want to bother her. So my options were really limited. Don’t use the device too much. Still check out this Naltra which Tessa recommended but with care.

I could also drop the class. It did fulfill core curriculum requirements but I could always take other classes. If I did that, then I’d need to convince Lissa to drop too. Then there were the people who were still enrolled as well as those who may have taken it when it was offered before.

If I didn’t have solid evidence that something fishy was up then there was nothing I could do. I was also conflicted because I wanted to believe there wasn’t anything nefarious at play, like Tessa’s joking admission of invasion. But there were just so many weird things she’d said to me that she had to answer for.

Breakfast was good. Allison watched me eat and I gave her top marks on everything. She lingered as I finished but soon got to work on food for herself and the others. I took some time to retrieve my device and pick over it. I considered opening it up to see if there were any obvious bugs but I doubted the internal technology would show anything like that, especially since scientists had been picking over them for years. And if I messed something up then I’d have a lot to explain to the college.

I did take some time to address concerns and abnormalities to my professor by email. I didn’t give any specifics but I figured that would be enough to get her attention. I found that Uncle Nolan responded with joy to my pictures and had sent a few of himself cooking at some event in return. I looked at the pictures I had sent him and my happy, blue-haired form. I glared at the device and the controller.

Swiftly, I put the device on and pulled up my save. I stood there as Corlie but with a sour expression. I spoke softly but to the room, “Is this what you want? Do you want to convert and conquer? Do you want to mess with me? Are you listening right now? Tessa…I’ve had enough of your bullshit coming and going. If you’re me then say so…if you’re just trying to manipulate me then I want to know.”

I didn’t expect an answer, especially so quickly.

“I’m sorry…”