Midwinter calling, day 53
December 25. Friday. Freya's day.
Waking up.
There is a mighty knock on the bedroom door and the married men are here to take me away to get clean and instil wisdom. The sky is bright but sun haven't risen yet, so I excuse myself and leave the bed. Caecilia hands me my bathrobe, and promises to keep track of my things and that everything will be cleaned and made tidy. Alith will follow along while Gunhild takes over and guard inside the bedroom, and she greet me with a wide smile and: "Good morning, my Lord."
As I put on the new and luxurious looking bathrobe I look around to make sure it's safe to open the door. One of Myrun's shieldmaidens is lying on a sofa, half-naked and smiling at me. Baugeid is sitting with a smile on the other sofa, in her shear and beautiful cloak seductively covering part of her body, playing a bit of music on her stringed instrument. The leg poking out from under my duvet must be Unn's, and the other pair of legs must be Lifa's. Sex toys on the bedside table and the floor, which Elvira picks up and put in a bag to be hidden from view before cleaned. There will be a hell of a lot of cleaning, and Elvira has already started. Gently but firmly, Caecilia push me out of my own bedroom.
Liv kept her word that I would be reasonably fit for the wedding, but I haven't had much sleep and I'm sore and tired. I've already had breakfast in bed, both literally and metaphorically. I was fed by Caecilia, Elvira and Baugeid, so that my hands and other body parts were free, partly for Baugeid. Baugeid is an accomplished musician with a good voice, and certainly a good entertainer who is looking forward to the coming week, but it wasn't until I saw her chest mark last night that I remembered that she is the hóra that tried to be mine at Tosra, where she only left my arm and side as we approached Myrun's camp.
The laughing and cheerful men push me towards the wing, while I think about the evening, night and morning that was. I have flashbacks and try to sort faces among bodies, arms, legs, feets, breasts and buttocks. Lips, nipples and vaginas. The 'spice' is effective on me, but it is quite clear that the spice not only affects the manhood, but is also some kind of brain drug as well. I frankly should have seen that coming.
'Quoth the Raven, 'Nevermore'!'
Jane and my sambos have planned the Stag night, and informed women about it before the announcement in front of me. It was far too organized, where women took turns, or handed me over to others when I needed to go to the toilet and showered. Twice. Like it was one long neverending tag-team. Apart from Liv and Caecilia who at least were somewhere in the background the whole time, I've lost count. So so many more women than I thought, and didn't even consider at dinner yesterday.
Liv and Caecilia was no surprise, and neither were Unn nor Gauthild. Alith was, but also not really. Myrun was expected. One of Myrun's shieldmaidens, who have been curious since Skiringsalr last summer was not. The queen's maid Skirlaug was hardly the last surprise. Elvira and Jalida. I was really surprised and uncomfortable when Ima appeared considering her life so far. That was definitely the most uncomfortable part of last night, and I was worried that Ima felt forced, but she wanted to experience sex where the man was the prey, and at the same time 'experience me'. As if I am some kind of reference. Of course, I remember Gunhild, who I absolutely didn't foresee, but she was the last of our guards as neither Bodil or Hillevi showed up. When we pass the guards day room, Bodil joins us and follows along in the background with Alith. Bodil tells us that the barometer have continued to rise so that bodes well for the day, which is a good thought.
I remember Asta and Lifa too. Lifa who wasn't even at the dinner, but woke me up as she crawled into bed very early, and started the morning's activities. She was definitely rested. We pass the kitchen on our way to the toilet, and I have more flashbacks. Wait. Elvira brought breakfast, and she was also quite wild this morning. But she was there last night too?
I sit on the dimly lit toilet, thinking about the shower where Skirlaug blindfolded me - as if the bathroom isn't dark enough with only a couple of lanterns for light. As it is in here. I really need to start trying to make good enough light bulbs. Although I have to give Skirlaug points for inventiveness and trying to have a private moment away from the other women. After she started massaging me with her hand and moved on to her mouth, she challenged me to satisfy her with just touch, so I went down on her before taking her from behind against the bench. Then we went up to the bedroom and continued. Points for being different and memorable, and quite fun.
Huh?
Wait a minute. Skirlaug is considerably shorter than I, and I could have my arm on her shoulders when we went up, but she was not that short in the bathroom when I kissed her breast, neck and lips. She was not that short bent over the bench.
Damn.
Damn.
There's a pretty good chance it wasn't Skirlaug in there, especially considering the blindfold and how much energy Skirlaug had when we got back to the bedroom. Damn. DAMN! I remember that Skirlaug was the one who suggested some food, a toilet visit and a shower to keep the energy up before we had sex. Which means I was clean, we were separated from witnesses and I was distracted.
I don't know which is worse given the likely options, which are either the princesses, or the queen. Because why else would it be kept secret? It shouldn't be Ulfarna, but Sefa and Haera are pretty similar in length and height. How tall is Skirlaug compared to them? I really hope I wasn't tricked into taking Princess Sefa's virginity, and that it's a plan from her, or one of her parents to 'force' me into a marriage. I don't think Asbjörn is behind it, but maybe Haera would be considering what Kari have said about her, or more likely Sefa herself. Sefa did not like being sidelined by Kari, and she seemed at least a little offended that I don't want her as my wife. Sefa doesn't know anything about DNA and maybe she was hoping to get pregnant, as given the stories I heard and the law, I would basically have to marry her as my second wife, regardless of what I or her parents want. If she doesn't get pregnant, the bathroom will probably have never happen, because she or they won't say anything so Sefa continues to be perceived as an untouched virgin by her future husband. I don't remember if I came in the woman or not, but I do remember that I was overall way too careless yesterday because condoms 'were annoying', and I know I came in several. Stupid. Stupid! Stupid! My brain sure wasn't working the way it usually do. Liv hasn't gotten pregnant so far, and neither have my sambos, but sure; they have an IUD and we've been more careful. A lot of those women won't have had an IUD. Shit.
I can never tell anyone. I can't even be sure it wasn't actually Skirlaug, and this isn't just paranoia and a wild idea in my head. I sure can't ask Skirlaug. It was deliberately discreetly done, so I wouldn't know, and I don't think Asbjörn knows, because it would be a big complication if he found out about it or it became public, especially if it was Queen Haera. But why would Haera do that? Sefa is much more logical. Haera as a married woman has more restrictions, especially since I have a high status and she is the Queen. Divorce etc, is the least that can happen, although I should be safer as it was a conspiracy by several women against me - if my word is believed more than the women's. I don't have any witnesses on my side, and the word of the Queen or Princess is hard to contradict, especially if they have Skirlaug on their side.
DAMN!
If it wasn't Skirlaug, at least she and whomever it was can be completely silent when others are having sex right in front of them, and not make any mistake like talk during the act.
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Maybe I should try to consider making some kind of primitive lie detector? It will be really bad, but can I trick them into believing that it works? Test it on the right people, with the right questions, so maybe it will help my story? Getting a response and having something move isn't hard, and they should be really worried that it works. Which is also a problem.
The men bang on the toilet stall door, so I wipe myself and go out. While I wash my hands, I continue to think, before they drag me into the sauna. I'm 'the man', and the mansion is mine, so Iselin and the women will use the mansions private bath house, with sauna and hot tub, and should already be there. Normally, the bride should normally be lifted over the threshold and taken into the man's house only after the wedding, but much is different about this wedding, and the mansion.
I should be able to figure out where either Haera or Sefa were, and rule out at least one of them. Hopefully both. I'll probably have nightmares if I don't.
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The thoughts, the sauna and the loud happy company have ensured that I'm awake and my body recover reasonably well. I drink a lot and eat some moose jerky while we talk. Well, they do most of the talking. Like the rumour that at least half the guest women, shieldmaidens and maids took the opportunity to test Sejdmann Arnesson's reputation for being able to satisfy women, and the men saw many women in good spirits. It seems that Jalida happily sang to herself while working. They count and come to the conclusion that there were seven women in my room when they picked me up, four of them resting or scattered over the furniture. They ask me the number, and I just shrug and say I don't know. I never counted, but best to keep it lower, so I say a dozen or so?
My back and shoulders hurt from their reaction but I might as well accept the congratulations. At least I have proved that I'm manly as hell according to their culture. That evening, night and morning was basically a big and mostly tag-team orgy - and it won't happen again. I feel strange, and I also just realised that I can only hope that none of the women have any venereal disease, because I can imagine that, for example, Baugeid probably have had a lot of sex with many different people. As far as I know, my 'regular' extra sexual partners like Alith, Liv and Myrun don't have any intimate sexual contact with anyone else, so less risk. But what about the other women? How many of them have IUDs? How the hell am I even supposed to bring up, that those who haven't had it, should put it in today? Nice way to start a wedding. I've been so damn careless and stupid. Stag night has just been a bad idea. A really bad idea. For fucks sack, LEARN!
Admittedly, Jane planned it well, but I think I understand some of her behaviour from the previous day. It could be that Jane regretted it when she realised how it would turn out, and didn't want to be involved. What was her plan? Maybe that she would pretend to be a stripper or something for me, so we could 'experience' each other before I got married, but her plan just nose dived straight to hell. It wouldn't be the first time one of her plans didn't survive contact with reality. And Jane is too much a fuck up to admit that, and trying to fix it.
Asbjörn gives me another thump on my shoulder and with a small laugh declares: "After a night like that, where you can walk and be in such good shape - even if you're sore and worn - no one can ever accuse you of being unmanly. Stag night is a damn good Midgård custom!"
"Midgård?!" Ask Maurr, Olafr, Digraldi and Jolfr basically as one voice. Oops.
They look at Asbjörn, who realises what he has revealed, and doesn't know how to recover and stammers as he tries to figure something out, while Iuli who knows just closes his eyes. So I just say:
"I am a human from Midgård. That is why my ears are round, and I have more hair than you. Last summer, when Bifrost lit up the sky a few days after Midsummer, was when I came here to Alfheimr. I'd appreciate it if you, for now, try to avoid spreading it wide and telling others. But there is no doubt that you are at a very unusual marriage between a Human man and an Elvish woman." They just stare at me. "That is why no one from my family is here, because my parents and siblings are alive, but travelling between the worlds is not easy. Jane is also a human from Midgård, who by will of the Gods came here to Alfheimr at the same time, but we are from different countries and we didn't know each other before she heard of me and sought me out last fall. Jane's language is called English, and it is a very important trade language in Midgård, which is the reason why I speak it fluently. My native language is Swedish, which is quite close to Norse."
After that revelation, the sauna's festive mood becomes awkward, so I quickly leave since it's time for the bathroom. They probably have a lot to think and talk about. Ciara helps me with shaving and combs and trim my short beard extra carefully, before we shower, since Ciara also makes sure I'm scrubbed clean everywhere and as clean and pretty as she can make me. It just feels so wrong that Ciara is so damn happy that I'm getting married today, to another woman. But that also applies to Kari. Thankfully, their joy is not for 'thank the Gods it isn't me'.
Once up in the bedroom, I see that the women have left, and Caecilia and Elvira have cleaned up, and Elvira is currently scrubbing and carefully wiping of all surfaces. Shakini have already finished with the floor and left. There are new bedding and mattresses, and everything is ready for the coming night. Ciara and Caecilia are proud when they show my new special clothes I'm getting married in. A dark blue suit with a white shirt underneath, and a light blue tie with a pretty yellow pattern, that is actually in gold thread. There is even a gold tie clasp with my house mark on it.
I let them know that Asbjörn accidentally revealed to the men that I am a human from Midgård. The staff already know that Jane and I are humans, but I don't know when they found out. Who really knows about it? I seem to have completely lost track of that, and honestly I haven't thought about it in quite some time.
Ciara and Caecilia insist on helping me dress, so I'm as neat as they can make me, and Ciara is so keen to show that she can tie a tie correctly and it must be perfect. Apparently Jane has shown that to all my sambos when she explained, showed pictures and sketched the clothes. That I can tie a tie is ignored; it's their job to dress and make me look good, and Ciara's eyes made me feel guilty for even trying to take it from her. Of all the things Jane introduces here, surely she could at least skipped ties? She probably did it on purpose, just because I would dislike it. I need to get Jane to take the credit in writing, so future men blame her. Huumm... I should be able to argue that neckties are bad from a security point of view because it's basically a noose around the neck, but not today. Maybe use that it sort of looks like a weird leash, and that won't do since I'm a regent?
Swords at the waist are not common in human weddings except in military contexts, but then again, Caecilia stands waiting with my crown on its small pillow. Ciara attaches a gold brooch with Freya's symbol to my breast pocket, and hangs Thor's hammer around my neck, and with a big smile she place the crown on my head, and takes a step back. Ciara looks so proud, pleased and happy, and I give her a thank you kiss, before giving another to Caecilia.
Elvira has finished cleaning, and is standing in the background just watching and smiling. I ask her if she has slept enough, because this will be a long day. Elvira looks into my eyes and say that it has been the best night and morning in a long time. Here eyes never leaves mine, and her gaze and widening sexy smile is not subtle. I guess I can feel a bit proud of that, and it feels good that at least she seems happy and isn't disappoint. Then again, she did return in the morning, with a sexy expectant smile and very enthusiastic. I don't know what the words she said in her native language mean, but I take it as a compliment considering the way she said them, and the way her face and body behaved.
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Alith is in on the conspiracy that my sambos have made about slightly changed ceremonies, and while she guards me in the bedroom so that everyone can get ready, she gives me instructions for what will happen and what to do. I just carefully rest on my back in my bed and wait, trying not to sweat. So many thoughts about last night. I realise that hopefully I'll be marrying Kari in three months, and I need to stop another orgy from happening. Not that it will be hard as I am no longer 'unbound'. I hope I don't disappoint Iselin tonight. And that I didn't get any venereal disease. Damn, something just feels wrong, and I don't know what. After effects of the night and the drug? Is it that I'm getting married today? Worried about Sefa or Haera? All of the above?
Alith is dressed up and looks damn good, and she is pleased by my compliment that some man will be lucky, and she can tell him, that I think he should thank the gods each morning for waking up and seeing her.
The musket doesn't quite match up though. Alith apologizes for borrowing the musket without asking, but after Jane gave them the idea, Iselin, Kari and Ciara were adamant that after the ceremony, a shot should signal the starts of the race back to the mansions front door. Of course I give Alith my permission and thank her for all her help, but she smile as she replies that I thanked her yesterday, although she looks forward to hopefully future thanks, since yesterday we kept it fairly quick. Not that we usually take a long time. Alith agree that yesterday mostly felt like a cover for our other intimate moments. The rumour she heard is that as my wife, Iselin will allow me to have intimate moments with other women than Ciara, Kari and Caecilia - as long as Iselin is told before or after.
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