The morning of training that Jaspar called for Maude to join him in was a warm, early spring morning. The snow was starting to melt, making the training yard wet and muddy, with water droplets raining down from the trees into the clearing. On this particular morning, some early birds were singing their songs over the training yard. Maude’s heart felt light. She had never heard so many birds singing simultaneously before.

There are so many beautiful things that I missed out on because of my training, she thought. When was the last time I stopped for long enough to admire the bird’s song? I can’t even remember the last time I did.

There were birds of all colors in the tree above her. A little one with an orange puffy chest hopped on a branch, while a red one swooped across the clearing.

“What are you looking at?” Jaspar’s voice asked, coming up behind her.

She turned around and noticed how close to her he was. She felt herself blush. Too close! She thought, taking a step back. It doesn’t matter how much I like this man, he is still set to be engaged to someone else.

“The birds’ song was just so beautiful,” she replied, a smile on her face. “And I was surprised to see how many of them there were. All different kinds, and colors. There were not many birds at the Holloway training yard.”

“I’m envious of your ability to admire and enjoy the simplest things,” Jaspar said with a smile. “I’m not sure when the last moment was that I took time to notice the birds or their song.”

So he feels as I do, Maude thought.

Maude felt herself blushing, so she turned away from him. “I doubt that I’m much better at it than you,” she said. “I also have a tendency to get buried in whatever it is that I’m doing.”

“Yes, I’ve noticed that,” Jaspar said warmly. “The capability you have to be single minded is unparalleled. Once you put your mind to something, you will achieve it.”

Maude laughed, unsure of what to say. “Well, thank you, I suppose,” she said. She could feel her heart stuttering in her chest.

I’ve got to change the conversation topic, she thought. Anything but this topic is acceptable.

“Shall we, um, get started then?” she asked, gesturing towards the sword racks.

“Let’s,” Jaspar agreed.

Relief spread through Maude. I’m supposed to be trying to get rid of these feelings. And he keeps on giving me reasons to hope for something instead.

They strode over to the racks, and Maude was able to quickly find the sword she was used to practicing with now. It had only been a matter of time until the sword had become as familiar to her as her own sword had once been.

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“I see you are still using the same one,” Jaspar said. “Have you considered trying a different one?”

“I mean I could,” Maude replied. “But this particular one is most like the sword I’ve spent most of my life with.”

“So it’s comfortable?” he asked.

“Very much so,” she answered. “I typically prefer lighter swords because it allows for quicker blows. My trainer said that speed was one of my greatest strengths, so I try to capitalize on that.”

“That’s true, you are fast,” Jaspar agreed. “I was just curious because at least in real battle, speed is not necessarily the thing you want the most of. It’s more of a ‘nice to have.’”

Maude shifted on her feet uncomfortably. She didn’t exactly love where this conversation was going either. “It still can be lethal,” she replied, “In the right person’s hands.”

“That’s true,” Jaspar replied, seeming to catch the message that she wanted to drop this topic of conversation. They walked over to the training dummies. “You must have been training hard,” Jaspar said. “I know about a month ago Jakob informed me that I’d need to replace a target dummy.”

Maude felt her face flush, remembering how she’d been hitting the dummy so hard in frustration with her feelings for this man, which had resulted in it falling off its wooden post.

Why these topics of conversation this morning? She wondered. What is possibly going through this man’s mind?

“Sorry about that,” she muttered. “That was a particularly rough day.”

He laughed. “Not to worry,” he said. “I am more so just impressed by your capabilities.”

And now we’ve come full circle, back to the original conversation, Maude thought.

Instead of giving him the satisfaction of a reply, Maude began hitting the target dummy. She was attempting to convince herself that her increase in heart rate was about her anticipation to exercise rather than about the man who was standing next to her.

He seemed to pick up on the idea that their conversation was over, at least for the time being, and he began hitting the target dummy that was in front of him.

Stop it, stop it, stop it! Maude thought, each thwack of her sword hitting the dummy spawning a new iteration of the thought in her mind. I have no chance! Why must he keep making me feel as though I may have a shot?

Maybe I do have a shot, a smaller voice suggested. Maybe the feeling is mutual.

No! She exclaimed, hitting the dummy with extra force.

“You alright there?” Jaspar asked, pausing next to her.

“Ah,” she replied, stopping her sword mid-swing. “Yes, I was just feeling a bit intense,” she replied.

He laughed again. “Now that we’re both all warmed up, would you like to try a duel again? I am curious to see if you’d be able to beat me now that you have been practicing with the Aulbertian moves.”

Maude looked at him sideways. “That could be interesting,” she replied. “I, too, am curious how you would fare against me now that I have been practicing more regularly again.” she paused for a moment, feeling her stomach started to get twisted up in knots at the thought of using her ability against him again. “Would our previous contract still stand?” she asked.

I know he’s able to hold his own against me, she thought. But I just can’t shake the idea that I’m going to kill someone every time I use it.

“Ha!” he laughed. “Of course it would. That contract remains valid until you leave the Rosenberg estate.”

“Good,” she breathed, feeling the knots loosen a little. “Now that I know what you’re capable of, I’m less concerned, but one can never be too sure.”

“After hearing about how your life has gone,” he said, “I totally understand why you’re thorough. You can trust me, though.”

Can I? She wondered.I’m not sure if I can or not. I’ve never met anyone who has tried to earn my trust as much as this man has. Why would he want to earn my trust in the first place?

She smiled at him as they both stepped up onto the platform in the center of the yard. Maude got into position, feeling far more confident in her stance to begin than she had the last time she’d dueled Jaspar.