“Alright, we’re gonna kick your ass!” Alexander shouts at me. The tip of his sword points at my forehead. “Try not to hit me in the face this time, okay? I need it.”

“Awww! All worked up over lil, ole me?” I chuckle with closed eyes.

My three friends surround me, their swords drawn.

“Oh Aleeeeeexaaaandeeeer!” I point the sword in my right hand at his face. “You’re going down fiiiiirst!” I lick the top of my lip from side to side.

Alexander nervously snickers. “You know, that habit of yours is really terrifying. It mars your good looks.”

I wink.

These past few years have further fueled my lust for combat. It’s safe to say my sadistic side has grown substantially. Nothing hypes me up more than swinging a sword.

Adding my gifts opened up a whole new level of combat. The human body can only strengthen to a certain extent. It’s why early humans made tools to make up for the deficiencies.

A regular tiger will always be deadlier than a barehanded human. A human with a shotgun though? Completely different story. Gifts are a “rocket launcher,” ascending my abilities beyond the sword into a damned near “super soldier.”

Even so, I only fight other “super soldiers” and they have more fighting experience than me. While I know I’m stronger than the vast majority of people, I don’t often get the chance to feel satisfaction when Master Talbert or my friend continually thrash me into a consistent losing streak. With exceptions, of course.

Like today.

Nigel flashes forward. He thrusts his sword at me.

From my feet to my neck, white energy traces over my bones, gleaming through my skin bright enough to show my skeleton to the outside world. Divine Treats enhance one’s physical abilities beyond the norm upon consumption. This “light cloak” as I’ve deemed it pushes me even farther ahead in terms of athletic prowess.

One of my blades comes up quickly.

Ching!

Deflected!

With the edge of the razor, I purposefully move the momentum away from my body. Nigel stumbles past me. I grin at him out of the corners of my eyes. The string of combat that’s bound us for years is alive and strong.

I giggle. “Too hasty! Don’t worry! You’re last! Save the fun for a moment!”

“So glad you’ve gotten used to your gifts!” says Nigel sarcastically once he regains balance.

“Oh? Did I break your stoic composure?” I blink. “Lil ole me?”

“You need to stop saying that,” remarks Remi.

I grin.

Remi and Alexander coordinate an attack. Remi ducks low and aims at my legs. Alexander cuts up high to shut off a potential dodge.

A separate muscle tightens in my core. Energy flows through me.

I force black tendrils into the earth. They spread out, hook the ground, then lift. The ground is pulled upward like a shield to protect my body.

Their swords smack the floating rock, and it kills their blows.

“Copycat!” mocks Alexander. “I can do it better!”

“Oh, that’s what they all say, sweety,” I coo from behind him and Remi.

Using my light gift, I quickly moved into their blind spots.

The two turn.

I raise the flats of my swords to hit my friends.

Both lift up to guard me.

It’s too late. Their neutered, gift-restricted versions are no match for me.

“Ah dammit,” groans Alexander.

Remi rolls her eyes.

I lightly tap them on their foreheads with my blades. “Dead.”

“We can see that.” Alexander lays back on the ground.

A blade lightly lands on my back shoulder. “Not done yet,” says Nigel behind me.

“I’m not? Try moving then,” I order the man without looking back.

Nigel makes a grunt. “Ah, dammit. You let me do that.”

I turn around. Nigel is frozen in place. Dark tendrils sneak down my leg through the ground and emerge right under Nigel. They ensnare him in place with their grip.

“I…win.…” I utter. “Ahhhh dammit.”

I slump forward.

My energy releases.

Nigel drops his sword, rushes forward, and catches me in his arms. “Not if you’re going to pass out after using your powers.”

“Ah, my hero.” I sarcastically pat his cheek. “Thanks for catching me. Cop a feel. You’ve earned it.”

“Shut up,” groans Nigel.

“When you figure out how to use both abilities at once, you’ll be unstoppable,” says Remi. She walks over to me and looks down with a smile. “You still beat two of us.”

“Without you two using your gifts or enhancing your physical abilities,” I retort.

“Wouldn’t want you to forget we’re not boulders in the heat of the moment.” Remi shrugs. “We’re doing our best, but we can’t supply you with the same level of training as we’ve had. Keep taking it slow. It takes years to build gift stamina. The process will probably take longer for you since you have two gifts.”

Two gifts. Its as impressive as it is exhausting. There’s a “muscle” in the body that controls Divine Treat eater’s gifts. I have two inside me. When they’re both activated on and off, it gets exhausting. Using them both at the same time still has me passing out. The result used to be instantaneous years ago, but I’m getting stronger and lasting longer.

The best analogy I can give is like trying to leg press and bench press at the exact same time. Doable, but not for someone who’s never exercised before. And as someone who’d never had gifts until eating the treats, just like everyone else, it I was out of shape, so to speak.

Picking favorites, I tend to lean on my dark gifts. It has more versatility, working kind of like a stretchy liquid metal. Plus, Master Talbert is also a dark gift user. His little tips have been beyond helpful. I use the ability to create tendrils, kind of like an octopus. It’s what I imagine anyways. The tendrils are solid, provide good defense, give me controlled-range attacks, and are much stronger than my natural body.

Light gifts, on the other hand, are a whole different story. No one I know can use them, thus, I have no tutor. It’s been very trial-and-error. Mostly error if we’re being honest.

From what I’ve figured out independently, light gifts can do two things: enhance and destroy. There’s the light cloak. It makes my bones light up. I get stronger and faster, even for a Divine Treat user. It’ll always give me an edge in combat, so I’ve leaned on the cloak in tight situations as an overall buff. The remainder of my ability is a “release.” I can coalesce the light energy into my body and fire it almost like a laser. I haven’t been able to reduce the power to anything lower than boulder destruction, so I never use it.

Light cloak for up-close and personal fights and dark gifts for distance and defense; it’s how I’ve parsed the abilities.

Even as I say that, it’s not like I’ve perfected my gifts by any means. There are still gaps. My friends have been helping me develop. I wouldn’t have gotten very far without them, but I worry that I’m burdening them too much with my deficiencies.

“I’m sorry, everyone,” I apologize.

“It was awe-inspiring regardless. Seriously, you’ll be a killing machine someday,” recognizes Alexander.

“Yeah, but I imagine you’d break through the dirt wall in a real combat situation.”

“Could have snapped my fingers and created a hole to stab you through.”

“Good to know,” I groan. “Well, at least I looked cool.”

“Until you passed out,” says Nigel.

I frown. “You can stop holding me anytime you want.”

“Okay then.” Nigels drops me onto the ground without an ounce of hesitation.

“Ow! Douche….”

Nigel smiles in his own charming way. “I was following orders, Lady Scarlet.”

So much for the “string” bonding us together. As arrogant as always. Annoying prodigy bastard. He’s gotten way too comfortable with me. They all have. Not that I’m really complaining. Life is better with them in it.

“Feel free to fall into my arms next time,” Alexander jokes.

“Really?” Remi eyes Alexander with a level gaze.

“Should I hit on you instead?” Alexander shifts his eyes toward Remi. They set into slits. It’s clear he’s ready to fight this pointless battle out.

“I’d rather you didn’t,” Remi mocks Alexander with a sardonic shiver wrecking her skin. “But you’d be lucky to find someone like me.”

“Maybe in the looks department, but your personality is busted,” Alexander scoffs. “I want to marry someone who’ll take care of my family, do odd jobs around my house, and help raise kids. For some reason, I do not see you doing any of that.”

“Make that pitch to my father, and it'll happen. Sounds like his dream life for me,” I tell from the ground. Annoyance laces my words.

“Hey, you’re pretty, too. Amazing to see you go from a frumpy little toddler to a gorgeous, manly woman, but you’re just as sadistic as Remi here,” Alexander recognizes. He juts a finger in my direction as he talks. “You enjoy fighting too much. And you’re smarter than me. I’d feel like a useless sack of crap married to you. You wouldn’t even need me!”

“Manly woman, huh?” I frown. “Well, most of that’s probably true. Among other reasons.”

“Like?”

“You’re all older than me,” I joke. Well, technically. Mentally, I’m older than all of them. What would I be now? Almost fifty years old in my head? Damn. “Soon you’ll all be in charge of this castle. Well, except for Alexander, it seems.”

“Now I’m dead inside,” bemoans Alexander. “My Typical ass gets to stay a loner soldier for the rest of his days.”

“You excited to get your own special operations team?” I ask Remi, ignoring Alexander’s plight. He’s been complaining for days.

Remi and Nigel are getting promoted, so to speak. News came some months back. They’ve been climbing through the ranks since they’re both intelligent Admix gift users with deep loyalty to their country. While Alexander isn’t being acknowledged with such honors, he’s kept up with Nigel all the way up to this point. There can only be one captain, and people, unfortunately for Alexander, respect Nigel more. He’ll end up serving Nigel in some right-hand man capacity, so I do not understand his complaints.

There’s been a “vibe” in the castle recently. Things are changing. It’s like everyone is preparing for the future.

Remi nods. “Yes. It’s a big pay increase with added responsibilities. Intelligence is my area of expertise. Leading the peacekeeping network in Water’s Bastion is a huge honor,” she boasts. “Hopefully, I can run the whole territorial division someday.”

Nigel grunts, “An understatement. You can basically fly, freeze people, and control objects with your mind. You’re quick. Efficient. A borderline assassin. It’s the perfect job for you.”

“Thanks, future captain.” Remi mockingly salutes Nigel.

“Gonna be weird taking orders from him,” groans Alexander.

“You’ll learn to like it.” Nigel offers with a gentle smile. “It’s only on an interim period with a few other candidates. It’ll be a few years before I assume full control. Even then, it’s not like Captain Van Gallan will be stepping down entirely. He’ll remain as an advisor to the baron, I imagine. You can’t take the fight out of that man.”

It shows how gifted Nigel is. There are other older gift users Captain Van Gallan could have picked to succeed him, but he still chose as one of the final few Nigel. Nigel is uniquely gifted with a sword and an Admix with an admittedly overpowered ability, so there is that. He’s also young, intelligent, and moldable. The perfect person for Van Gallan to train to succeed him.

Some people in the castle begrudged Nigel’s quick advancement. Those mutterings were silenced when Captain Van Gallan ordered a combative demonstration between all potential successors. Nigel won easily. I watched the fights. He didn’t even get scratched.

I’d say Nigel’s guaranteed for the role, but we won’t know for years. The whole process is being held like a tournament between a handful of people until Captain Van Gallan officially announces his retirement. That’ll be in a decade or less. In that time, those in the line to succeed him will prove themselves through acts of leadership and combat. Once accepted for the role by Captain Van Gallan and the current baron, the candidate will then take a trip to the capital of Zalevet, Camden, to be ratified by the King and our main general. Only then will they have the right to rule the full military of a single territory. It has to do with unification, sovereignty, and civil war prevention. It sounds like a lot to me, but I’m sure Nigel will succeed.

“Too true. The Captain’s a tough old bastard,” agrees Alexander. His gaze then turns to me. “You’ll be getting some responsibilities soon, too, huh?”

My left eye twitches. “I turned fifteen last week. But who knows? Ever since my parents popped out my little brother, they’ve barely cared for me. Maybe I’m in the clear?”

It’s weird having a sibling. Mostly because I was an only child in my past life. It’s hard to even see my parent’s spawn as a relative of mine. We may be bound by blood, but none of them are my family.

These three people standing here before me would be the closest things I have to relatives in this strange new world. Them and Sonya.

The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

Hmm. In fifteen years, I’ll have caught up to my previous life. Then this place will have been my longest home.

Time sure flies by...

“Ah, well, we all need to go out drinking in the city!” Alexander caws. “That celebration they threw you was downright boring, no offense. There was no booze! Adults can drink! They should have let you!”

“There was booze there,” I reply. My nose crinkles. “Wine.”

“I meant real booze! Whiskey! Beer! Not that fruit juice! Come on! It’s hard to get drunk off that crap. Believe me, drunk Scarlet is on my bucket list of things to see.”

My gaze narrows. “And why is that?”

Alexander shrugs. “No reason. Might be funny.”

Remi nods at that statement. Even so, she shoots Alexander a peculiar look.

Nigel contributes nothing to the conversation. He merely stares on. The edge of his shirt flaps lightly in the wind. It is the only movement coming from his body.

Remi shudders. “Yeah, so that was creepy. Remember to be on your guard if we ever go drinking with Alexander.” She points an accusing finger at the man without ever looking back at him. “He’s a lecher.”

“There goes my reputation again,” complains Alexander. He wipes the edge of his temple with the back of his hand. An exasperated sigh slips past his lips.

Nigel walks over to Alexander. He holds out a hand to the man still lying lazily on the ground. “You can complain about that when we get back to the castle.”

“Sure! Cause I’ve got many more complaints where that came from! You can count on me!”

“Oh, joy,” mocks Remi as she rolls her eyes. “We’ll catch up to you in a second. I’ve got to talk to Scarlet real quick.”

“We can—”

“Alone,” stresses Remi.

Alexander holds up his hands. “Fine, fine! Talk all you want. If it’s about me, remember to mention my long, flowing, golden hair. It’s quite soft. Silky even.”

Remi flips him the bird. Alexander laughs. Nigel bows to the rest of us. The two men exit the scenery. Flattened grass remains in their wake as the trees seem to part for them.

Remi and I are left alone.

“What’s going on? Is something wrong?” I ask Remi. “Do you actually want to talk about Alexander’s fluffy hair?”

“I think the word he used was silky,” corrects Remi as she smiles.

“I know that’s what he said, but silky goes with, I dunno, sexy guys. Does that make any sense?” The tip of my finger taps my chin a few times. “Fluffy works better for him. Not that it means he’s ugly or anything. It’s just, I dunno, more accurate?”

“Sure, sure.” Remi waves me off. She isn’t really interested in my vague line of reasoning, and I don’t blame her. Remi jerks her head towards the pond. “Come on. Let’s stick our feet in. It’ll relax us.”

“Oh, so it’s a big talk,” I notice with a raise of an eyebrow. “Need me to sit down first?”

“It might help. The guys are gone, so this’ll be easier to tell you one-on-one.”

Well, they’re gone in body only. My mind is still very much male in many ways.

Jokes aside, Remi is beautiful. Watching her grow up into the woman she is now has astounded me. Curvy, but not so blatantly that she appears fake. Her hair is still short, but the depth of the color has accelerated to an even darker black.

The look in her eyes exudes a deeper level of confidence than she had when I first saw her. She’s the very definition of a stunning swordswoman. There’s a solemn romantic vibe to her that even I find compelling. Beyond that, she’s a good friend, probably my best friend in this world.

I slip off my boots. Remi does the same. We both dip our feet into the water. The cool liquid provides an instant calming sensation while the strands of grass below us support us in our seated positions.

“Ahhhh, good choice!” I cry as I lick the top of my lip.

“Ha!”

“What?”

“That tick of yours is adorable.” Remi smiles at me. With the men gone, her guard is more relaxed. She isn’t as sarcastically stoic, simply my friend.

“Oh stooooop. It’s weird. I wish I could stop it.”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s kind of cute. Even in battle, it’s got an allure to it. I’m sure Alexander only brought it up because he likes it.”

“Please, I’m a child. No one finds me attractive.”

“Even you don’t believe that.” Remi playfully nudges me. “Maybe when we first met you, yeah, you were a little haggard. Crazy red hair. Small. Overly aggressive, even if you were polite in the words you used. But now—” She gestures at me. “—you’ve grown. Well, not in height. You’re still short, but you’ve developed everywhere else that counts. Even in that baggy shirt, your chest proudly tells the world, ‘I am here!’ All your training kept your waist thin. The redness of your hair looks like a mass of fire. Pretty green eyes like emeralds. Be grateful. You’re almost as charming as me.”

“He called me a manly woman,” I reference Alexander’s subtle dig.

“Does that bother you?”

“Is it true?”

“You have a lot of manish tendencies,” acknowledges Remi. “Brash. Impulsive. Dirty. Violent. You actually like fighting people, Scarlet.”

“I'm dirty? No way.”

“Please, if you didn’t have maids, your room would be filthy.”

“I pick up my stuff.”

“Ha! Come on, Scarlet.”

“You really make me sound like an asshole.”

“You’re also feminine, don’t worry. From the clothes you wear, the care for your hair, the little movements you make when you’re talking to people. There’s an inherent softness in the way you talk and interact with others. When you’re not fighting, that is. Oh, and you're an excellent cook.”

“That last one's demeaning to all women.”

“Yeah, cause I can’t cook worth a shit. Nothing special at least,” relents Remi. “Alright, anything I say will seem mean. It’s probably easier to say you aren’t traditional and move on.”

“And you are?”

“Touché. Fine, you’re a beautiful, big-breasted, charming woman. Alexander’s just being an asshole.”

I blush gently. My eyes turn away out of embarrassment. “Thank you, I suppose. Not that I really care.”

“Clearly.”

I roll my eyes.

It’s weird to get complimented on a body that I still feel like I am borrowing.

In my past life, I was neither beautiful nor ugly. I feel the same way as Scarlet, but even I’m not blind. Passing glances from guards. Alexander’s gaze lingers low when we talk sometimes. Even Nigel watches me at odd times.

It makes me realize how obvious men are when they see something they like.

And how girls easily notice such things.

The worst part is that I am pretty short. I'm a few inches over five feet if I’m judging myself correctly. Remi’s like four inches taller than me, and Nigel and Alexander are like damn giants. I used to be above six-foot in my past life. Now I’m barely taller than a middle schooler.

It’s fine. I’ve gotten used to it. What this body lacks in height and strength, it makes up for in speed and flexibility.

It’s still annoying to have to look up to everyone when I talk, though.

“Alexander has the right idea. The three of us need to sneak you into town someday, and give you an experience you’ll never forget,” reflects Remi. “We’ll need to dress you up a bit so that you’re not recognizable. Though you’ve never been allowed to leave the castle before. It may be entirely fine to let you go as you are. It’s not like anyone would know you’re the baron’s daughter just from some passing glances.”

“Thanks for mentioning that. Forgot I’ve been a captive in my own home for years.” My head reclines back. I look into the blueness of the sky above cutting through the trees. “Hmmm. Hypothetically speaking, what would we do out in the town? What’s it like?”

“We’d go drinking, eating, see the sights. We’ll pay, of course. No need for Lady Scarlet to dirty herself with the peasantry. Then afterward, well, it might be a fine idea for you to meet a man.”

“Yeah. Father would approve of some random person I met in town. Good thinking.”

“I wasn’t talking about marriage.”

“What are you—” I cut myself off. “Oh.”

“It’s a good way to relieve stress.” Remi falls back into the grass. “It might be a good idea to sleep with someone else once so you’re not totally unprepared on your wedding night.”

I keen, falling back into the grass as well. “No thanks. I don’t know if I’d like that kind of thing.”

As Scarlet, my fascination for women has not gone away. My attraction is too engrained in my mental landscape, even if my body doesn’t react in the same excited way as before my death.

Men? Well…that’s a complicated issue…as I always thought it would be.

This body and life have already changed the way I view the world. The hormones, the upbringing, and the structure have crept their way into my prior consciousness, altering my perspective of the world and my place in it.

I mean, I’ve already been accosted by men many times. What was once a fear is now a nuisance. My boobs were already too big at twelve, but they suddenly surged into giant burdens by the time I turned fourteen. Damned late puberty.

Father would throw occasional parties for important people around Lake Hopeful at the Castle. I had grown men a decade or two older than me coming up to me during them. I suspect the idea of having a young, moldable, big-boobed wife connected to the baron enticed the dirty bastards.

Luckily, Alexander or Nigel would help me scare off the really pervy ones. It happened enough that I had to have one of them always guard me. I mean, not that they needed to. I could have handled things on my own. And I think that’s why they were assigned the duty.

You threaten one mayor with a bread knife, and suddenly you need constant protection at parties. Ha! They should have been more offended that a nearly forty-year-old politician tried to grope a small teenager.

Well, whatever….

Then there were the boys my age that I met at these events. They were too shy to do anything, so they wouldn’t talk to me. The girls were jealous of my looks and status. So I never made any friends of either sex.

Thank Gods for Remi and the gang, otherwise, I’d be totally socially inept.

Basically, I’ve lived in this body long enough to at least be used to it. Not entirely, but enough to ignore reality for the most part.

However, sexual shit gives me major anxiety. Gods, I don’t want to sleep with a guy. Just the thought makes me want to hurl. Even with my body, my family fighting hard to push me in that direction, I cannot overcome my prior upbringing.

Do I find men attractive? Kind of. I can recognize their objective beauty. Nigel is lovely, but I don’t want to have sex with him. Then again, I feel the exact same way about Remi. Is that due to my body, my mind, or the fact that they’re my friends?

War? Politics? Math? Economics? Easy.

Relationships? Love? Sex? Never been good at that side of the human condition.

It doesn’t help that I’m already in the prelude of a marriage I never agreed to. I can’t help but think of these things when the point of marriage is to have sex and take care of children, at least in this world.

Obviously, I’ve been thinking of ways to get out of it. It’s all I do at night before going to bed. I sit there in the darkness staring at the ceiling, thinking. Every time, those thoughts drift to sexual garbage. It’s embarrassing. I’ve largely pushed that aspect of my life behind a steel wall. Even when I’m…horny…I ignore it. Touching this body or using it sexually would almost feel like…assault? I still feel awkward taking baths and dressing. In my kid days, it was worse. Now, I can at least look at myself without feeling utter shame. It doesn’t mean I linger, though.

Maybe if I’d been born a male again, I’d be fine. It’s because I’m the object of my prior attraction that I feel so separated from my physical and mental selves.

Gods, I’d be lying if I said I haven’t thought about sex with this body at least once, though. Maybe a few times? Okay, every night since I learned my “fate.” Who wouldn’t wonder what it’s like being on the other end of things? How it feels? Not that I’m going to open myself up to a stranger out of curiosity. The idea repulses me. Other people would probably go wild. I’ve never been like that.

Why do I have to think about such things? Damned hormones. Damned father. Screw you for making me have to think about this shit! It’s horrifying! Every time I think about giving birth, I hyperventilate!

Shit, push it aside for now. No panicking in front of Remi, Scarlet. Deep, internal breaths! Relaaaaax!

“All you’ll have to do is lay there,” jokes Remi.

A twitch in my masculine memories suddenly grows annoyed at that flippant response, but I immediately calm it.

“Is this what you wanted to talk about? What? Too embarrassed to say these things in front of Alexander and Nigel?”

“Not exactly. I was assigned to guard you next week on a trip to the city.”

“The city? I’m going to the city? Why?”

Remi pauses. She looks downward away from me. “Not in a fun way. Your father has found a potential suitor for you. Master Talbert asked that I protect you while you and the man are getting acquainted.”

I flinch.

So soon….

I thought I might have more time.

Father wants to profit off me quickly, huh? Bastard. He’s unequally kind and cruel. Honestly, I don’t hate him. Then again, I don't really like him either. I get why he’s doing what he’s doing; it’s just not fair to me. Not in the slightest.

Why don’t I just run away? Cause I’ll get captured immediately? That was true when I was a young child, but now? I could get away easily. I’m a Dyad after all.

The ramifications of fleeing are clear and negative. For one, I’d have soldiers sent after me. Since I’m a Divine Treat eater, an exclusive squad of gift users would be formed for my retrieval. My friends would be a part of that group, and if they refused, they’d either be fired or imprisoned. Assuming they aren’t attached to search for me, at the very least, Captain Van Gallan or Master Talbert will be. Both are stronger than me by miles.

Word would then spread throughout the region then the entire country given that I’m the daughter of one of the six barons. I’d have to avoid towns. My face would be circulated between local governments, merchant guilds, mercenary bands, and adventurer pubs. Rewards would be offered below a big picture of my face. I’d never be able to live normally. Worst of all, I’d have to spend my life killing to survive or, at the very least, severely maiming people.

If I actually want to have a “life” in this world, I can’t flee. It’ll restrict any potential happiness I might have. There’s always the option of fleeing the country. On the inverse, I won’t have anything indicating me as a “native.” Again, I could be imprisoned or captured. I might even be ransomed if someone knew who I was. At worst, I’d be killed. Like in Zalevet, I’d be in a position where I might have to kill to survive.

The only route to peace is to find a way out of this marriage through either the groom or my father. It’s the path of least resistance.

And…a part of me…has simply accepted my role in this world… I’ve always been good at doing that....

“I still can’t say no,” I whisper.

“Huh?”

“Do you know who it is?”

“I do not know a name, only that the family has connections to the trading hubs on the southern coast. And that your suitor is handsome.”

“There’s something.” I sigh. “Taking that into account, Father is likely setting me up with someone who’ll aid in trading the agricultural goods within his region at cheaper prices, thus helping Zalevet become self-sufficient, cutting off our reliability on Brosnock for goods if war comes our way. Can’t get any of that done without mass capital or a family member connecting the two. Heh. If I weren’t being used as a piece of meat, I’d almost be impressed at the strategic comprehension.”

“You’re probably right.”

“Sadly.” My eyes turn back to the sky away from Remi. “You’ll stab him if he’s a creep, right?”

“Quickly between the legs,” says Remi. “Though they’ll have my head afterward.”

“They can take us both then. There’s no way I’m letting that happen.”

Remi pats me on the side of my face. “How cute.”

I puff.

Remi grows quiet. There’s a calmness in her voice. “I do not envy your position.”

“Is that so?”

“I decided to be a soldier because my family was poor. My father died from disease when I was young, so my mother took care of my siblings and me. Strange men would be at our house at all hours of the night. Sometimes they were nice, and we got treats as they left. Others were violent. I’d hear my mom crying out in pain. They’d even hurt us on the way out. It was a rough upbringing.”

“Remi….”

“Don’t worry about me. The past is the past. No use dwelling on it. It’ll make me cry if I think about it too long.”

I frown.

“When I got a little older, I decided to take on a larger role supporting the family. As the eldest child, I could have done anything. Worked in a field. Helped at a shop. Sold my body like my mother…but I kept thinking how powerless I felt as my mother suffered for our sake. I wanted strength, even if that sounds corny.” She turns back to me. “Now I’m a soldier. I did so well in basic training that they put me to work here at the castle. Then I was selected to receive a Divine Treat. Most of my personal needs are provided for by the castle, so I send my earnings back home. My siblings are well-fed. My mother no longer has to work. All is well.”

My gaze shifts towards my friend as she speaks. “That was a hard decision to make at such a young age.”

“But it was a decision that I got to make. Me. No one else.” Remi’s voice grows cold. It begins to prick my skin. “What decisions can you make?”

I bite the inside of my cheek.

“You want to be a soldier? No. Vetoed by political ambitions. How to properly use your gifts? Same reasoning. Want to run away? No. You’ll be hunted down in days, forced to return to your pre-ordained destiny as a woman in a loveless marriage popping out politically binding babies. Sure, you’re educated, strong, and even possess amazing abilities. You’re unprecedented in that regard. If you were allowed any level of freedom, you’d have the world bowing before you. If you were a man, things would be vastly different, but your time has always been divided between many things, with the end goal being a life chosen by another.”

Emotions choke me. My jaw sets in a firm line.

Remi gazes at me. “I’m sorry. That was too blunt, wasn’t it?”

I turn away from Remi. Again, I stare at the sky.

“Don’t you feel like that blue sky is just a well-painted cage?” I ponder, pointing upward.

Remi follows my eyes. She pauses. Her breath hesitates. “No.”

“I see.”