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3.24. Rejection

Scotty and Becky take leave via a portal scroll to negotiate with the Guild Society at the beginning of the day. Their goal is to register our new guild and obtain resources. Earth cultivators continue to work on the land, mainly focusing on our guild hall. There is less work for the rest of us to do, so we settle as much as possible and prepare for our new life.

Anvil was a place cultivators retired to when they reached their peak. Constant skirmishes with monsters from the sea made money easy to come by and kept the town's popularity low. And since it was an insignificant town, it was left out of most land conflicts.

For most people here, our new town is their restart in life, especially those leaning toward their later years and stagnating in cultivation. It's not easy picking a new path, and those with the time take a methodical approach to their decision-making. Even my buddy Cru is struggling with this new life and snuck away during morning training to cope. I know that isn't the complete truth of the matter. Still, I'm bummed he didn't think he could say goodbye. At least Nette ensured he knows we expect him to return.

To put idle bodies to use, temporary security assignments are given — we take this a step further and mix people and spiders together on scouting excursions. There's no pushback on the plan from people or spiders. I'm guessing everyone is looking to do what they can to pitch in. Besides security detail, people are asked to share their knowledge with the children and others, and are allowed to cultivate.

Nette, Gene, and Jenna Julliens work out most of the students' schedules. Jenna has a keen interest in our youth programs. The middle-aged mother has three of her own kids. James Jr., their oldest son, is one of the newly appointed pack leaders, along with Jen and Jud. Even her husband, James the Original, has a fiery passion for the kids' education and diligently seeks ways to help. Right away, they begin implementing the new schedule for the packs.

With the help of dozens of volunteers, a routine of learning, playing, exploring, and training begins to take shape. On the first day of the schedule's implementation, less chaos is present — not that the kids have been causing much trouble.

Lessons include cultivation principles and application, world history, geography, the magic of mana, laws of nature, mana techniques, safe weapon handling, pathways and classes, mathematics, science, exploration, and lessons on perks and why perception is the most important. I plan to attend some of the classes myself… probably most of the classes, actually.

Since each pack varies in age and the students outnumber our teachers, we have taken to the packs, switching days of learning and exploring. Half the packs will spend their day in class while the other half explores and gains hands-on experience under the close supervision of adults, and then the next day, they switch.

After dinner, I find myself alone and with open time. Gene is participating in challenges with the packs. Bones is scheming world domination with some of the Anvil veterans, or maybe they are trying to find ways to improve our defenses. It's unclear. Their secret meeting pulls in Fury and Roxi, so even my sparring partners are missing. A part of me thinks to seek out Lana, but I'm unsure why or what for. Just picturing the encounter is enough to dissuade me from the perilous pursuit that can only end in disaster. So I find a peaceful spot by the lake and cultivate.

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I'm close to binding water. I know it. Tub water was a silly idea. Actual water, lake water, that's the key to success. Eyes closed, head down, I fall into a trance and focus on the rich blue mana pool. My core longs for the bond. I can feel it as my channels open. I'm at peace and am one with the water. The waves, the flow, it is a part of me.

I breathe in and out, visualizing the water flow ebb and flow. With each breath, the water is closer. Resisting the urge to pull on the energy, I methodically breathe and wait. All I can feel now is water. Though I don't open my eyes, I know I'm submerged. Still, I relax and breathe. The refreshing blue mana flows through me and into my channels. From there, it makes its way to my core.

My fifth core is open and ready. I can see it binding. I can feel the energy becoming a part of me. I wait patiently as the mana inches closer and closer. It's at the edge of my core. The energy pools before it drips into my soul. I begin to claim the energy when, at once, it disperses. The slow flow of water turns into a rapid repulsion. My channels are left dry while I'm soaked, out of breath, and frustrated.

What the hell? I've never felt so connected to energy?

Why was I rejected?

I try again.

Again.

And again.

Each time, the water rejects me. Every rejection happens sooner in the process. Now, I can barely sense the slippery substance. Utilizing my greatest strength, I quit. Since I'm already soaked, I take a quick swim in the waters that seem to hate me, burn my clothes, and order a new set of black linen. I can't fathom why I'm a failure and not in the mood to force the issue. I know at this point, sleep isn't an option. That leaves me to work on what I have — death, shadow, and mind. Maybe I'm just a three-trick pony.

Flustered and frustrated, I once again control my breathing. This time, I focus within. I practice channeling each energy and concentrating on their specific feeling and flow. Death is cold, violent, and hungry. The energy beckons me to use it at all times, and its influence and presence are constant reminders that death lingers no matter what I do.

Shadow, on the other hand, is the opposite. Not even darkness's placid, quiet nature can match shadow's lethargic apathy. Oddly, the energy's lack of presence is comforting. Though shadow does not care, you feel better when wrapped in its power.

Mind mana is my mana, for lack of better words. Death hungers, shadow sleeps, and water feels like an old friend, but mind mana feels like it's me, like it's my energy. No, my energy is probably more equal to shadow. Still, the dark purple mana has my essence to it. It is my will. For the rest of the night, I focus on this energy. If it is me, I should be the most familiar with it… or maybe I can find a way to utilize it better.

Like my attempts at binding water, there are no breakthroughs with mind mana. I'm more familiar with it, which doesn't grant me new skills. Nor do I feel any closer to having control over thoughts like Nette. Though I can tap into minds, I don't have the power to control thoughts like she does. More than that, when I try to press the matter, I get a vile feeling in my pit.

All in all, the night is an overwhelming success. No nightmares, no bear attacks, and no fighting. Which means this new day is going to be a good day.

Full of confidence, I greet the sun with a smile and an open embrace. Some Days just start out perfect. This is going to be one of those days.