First things first, Bowsette took out all the orbs he owned and tossed them on the ground. They were invisible to the eye except for the owner, but as long as Bowsette could keep track on them it would be an easy way to trap his opponents.
Seeing as they were all charging simultaneously, this was going to be easier than he thought.
Mario himself took out a large hammer, jumping into the air to swing it.
“So predictable! How about you go find some better way to settle this?” Bowsette yelled. He activated the Tweester Orb below Mario and blasted him away. He’d be back, and soon, but eliminating the primary threat fast was going to make this fight a lot more smooth.
Now with nine opponents before him, he needed to thin the crowd out as quickly as possible, even if that meant focusing on the weaker ones first. He used his Dodge Master badge to weave through a volley of punches and kicks from Yoshi and Daisy, as well as a surprise uppercut from Vivan that would otherwise have sent him flying several feet in the air. And then he surveyed everyone to identify some weak points.
The admirable Admiral himself, Bobbery, was a danger to himself and those around him, what with his exploding powers and all, so he would be a good target to blast several opponents away.
But it looked like, standing in his way of that was... uh, some guy. He had long brown hair and a green cap, but Bowsette didn’t think he had ever seen him before, and he didn’t look like he was exactly combat-ready.
“Who... who are you?” Bowsette asked.
“What do you mean? I’m Prince Pine!”
What? “What?”
“Prince Pine, of Jewelry Land! I’m one of the Royal Society members! Pretty famous, you know?”
Friggin’ Jewelry Land? You mean that one Bowsette took over in like five seconds and split into a Light and Dark Realm so that Bowser could harness extradimensional darkness soul magic? “Why the heck are you here?”
“I... I was having tea with Princess Peach!” Prince Pine yelled. “But I will have you know, I was trained by Kung Fu Toads at Pagoda Peak for two years, and I--”
Bowsette slapped him across the face and he smacked into the castle door, knocked out immediately.
That made eight.
Yoshi and Birdo, teamed up as usual, chattered incomprehensibly in their native tongues--well, Birdo didn’t have a tongue, but her native nasal noises-- and simulatenously launched eggs at Bowsette. He wasn’t falling for that trick again and instead of swiping at the eggs to break them, taking some of the damage, he leapt into the air and kicked Yoshi in the face. He floated to the ground slowly but at the perfect angle to land right in front of Bobbery, who unleashed a series of kicks, but not ones that would much hurt Bowsette.
“You could have helped us,” Admiral Bobber said. “We were inviting you to a tennis tournament!”
Bowsette multibounced off Bobbery’s head. “Who cares about tennis when I’m Supreme Overlordess of the Mushroom Kingdom?” Bowsette asked in a sing-songy tone. Finally, he kicked Bobbery towards Yoshi and Birdo, who split apart as they jumped away from the Bob-omb. But he didn’t explode, not yet. He was only severely ticked off.
A soccer ball blasted towards Bowsette, hitting him in the back of the head and knocking him down briefly. Had he not been Bowser himself, that kick would likely have been powerful enough to have caught his hair on fire. Luckily, that was not the case.
As Daisy landed, she stuck one leg into the air, ready to dash forward while kicking a bunch of times. Bowsette grinned and responded by shooting a fireball out of her mouth. Daisy leapt over it, but in an awkward, exposed stance. So Bowsette grabbed hold of Bobbery, lit the string attached to his head on fire, and threw him towards her.
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The explosion was immense and knocked both opponents out completely.
With Yoshi and Birdo now separated on the battlefield, this was going to be an easier fight, especially with only six to fight. Birdo was next to Donkey Kong Jr., who stood there smiling like he didn’t understand what was going on. He probably didn’t.
“Hey furball, get a load of this!” Bowsette struck a seductive pose, putting an arm behind his head and leaning back slightly, and that seemed to set Donkey Kong Jr.’s heart aflame, because hearts literally burst out from his eyes and he started dashing over towards him.
Birdo followed, trying to stop him, but it was too late. Bowsette gripped a nearby tree, ripped it from the ground, and swung it into Donkey Kong Jr. and Birdo, knocking the former clear over the castle itself. Five left. Birdo skidded back onto her feet, and closer again to Yoshi, and the two continued their volley of eggs.
Bowsette was able to dodge the eggs easily, though, and hopped into her shell anytime one got too close, which absorbed any damage that would otherwise be done. When he found his next targets, Peach and Vivian, he hopped into the air, entered his shell, and rotated so that it fell down spike-side down, nearly crushing Vivian had she not been able to evaporate into a shadow on the ground.
Darn it, that would have been such a good finishing move...
“Y-y-y-y-you should give up,” said Luigi, who was standing in the exact same place as before and still shaking.
“Uh, no?” Bowsette put a finger up to his lips. “Maybe you could give yourself up, though, and I might spare you.” He winked. Luigi’s face turned red and he curled up into a ball.
Peach sighed. “Grow a pair, Luigi.” She tossed him a Power Star, and he caught it, but he was still too afraid and embarrassed to get up.
“Now it’s just you and me,” Bowsette said to Peach. “Call them off so we can finally settle this, womano a womano.
“That’s not how you...” Peach stopped herself. “They won’t call themselves off. And you know what? That’s--” Peach hopped in the air and flew towards Bowsette, her hip crashing into his stomach and then exploding on impact. Bowsette was knocked to the ground. “--Okay!”
Bowsette got up, but he realized he was surrounded on all sides. Peach in front of him, Yoshi and Birdo to the right, Vivian to his left, and technically Luigi behind him.
“Watch this!” Bowsette shouted. He spread his arms wide and unleashed all the Mecha Fly Guys he had been saving since Vibe Island, flying around at random chaotic speeds and really splicing up the battlefield where nobody could reach him with their attacks. Yoshi and Birdo’s eggs were effectively neutralized as each of their eggs collided into a mechanical doll with little damage done to it.
He took this opportunity to single out Birdo and swipe her backwards with his tail. She shouted something but it was just like, “Buzz buzz buzz buzz,” so Bowsette couldn’t adequately respond to it. Instead, he shot a fireball her way and knocked her into Yoshi.
Both were highly injured and just about knocked out, but they got back up and started holding hands. Oh no, were they going to try some sort of fusion magic or spirit combo or some tennis Ultra Smash that would act effectively as a special combat move?
It didn’t matter.
“Kakakakaka!”
Because--
They were standing right underneath a Spark Orb trap!
Yoshi and Birdo were caught and shocked for a good ten seconds, both collapsed on the ground afterwards.
That left just three, and while Luigi was now on his feet, it didn’t seem that he--
Bowsette could no longer move. He was stuck in mid-air, mid-laugh even, and his body was in a strange inverted color. Luigi hopped into this sphere of stasis and began punching Bowsette several times in several places. He didn’t feel anything, though, so Luigi must have been even weaker than he thought.
This was surely the power of the Negative Zone, harnessing the power of Subcon in a way that few but Luigi himself could understand, considering how poorly-understood that realm was. But it did not appear to be effective.
When the stasis field disappeared though... Bowsette’s body felt the full force of impact from every attack that Luigi had delivered in those ten seconds. He was sent reeling, tumbling backwards, and then smashed onto the ground, all at once.
That... really hurt!
He got back up, but he was definitely going to have a few bruises in the morning.
“Okay, now I guess we’ll get serious about this,” Bowsette said. He took out his Chomp Shell chain, glittering with Star Shard energy, and began spinning it around. “Let’s fight.”