Hmm.

This cell was a bit more damp, a bit more dark, than the one underneath the Koopa Bros. Fortress that Bowser had stayed in for a month before his criminal trial. But even if it was in worse condition, it was larger, and there were a dozen other prisoners to keep him company. It was a noticeable upgrade in every way.

Even if he was tossed in, even if his arms and legs were bound, he was still Bowser, the Power of the Stars, the Unholy Terror of the Mushroom Kingdom. Even if he desperately didn’t want to be so.

“You won’t keep me here,” he told the guards. “You will let me go.”

“Emperor’s orders,” the Koopatrol said.

“I should have never replaced the Terra Cottas with you cretins!” he shouted.

The other prisoners all giggled softly.

He gruffed. “What?”

One dry, flaky voice in particular caught Bowser’s attention.

“Old friend...” Boom Boom said, weakly.

“I knew you’d be here somewhere,” Bowser said with a smile. “How’s it been?”

“Boom Boom’s been better. Hasn’t worked out in a while.”

Bowser’s eyes adjusted to the darkness better and he saw what had become of Boom Boom. He was emaciated, his muscles gone and belly thin. His smile was with teeth that had been worn down, eyes that sagged. How long had he been in this prison?

“How long have you been in this prison?” Bowser asked.

“Since the beginning,” Boom Boom said. “Your father-- Kamek, that is-- deemed Boom Boom a threat to the throne, so he had him put in here for the duration of the conflict.”

“You? Why would you ever have been a target?”

“Boom Boom could have been a contender,” Boom Boom said. “He’s given it a lot of thought since he got here, and Kamek was probably right. Out of everyone outside the Royal Family, Boom Boom was the only one who could have given it a fair shot. Boom Boom was the one who could convince you to abdicate, so he could have been the one to convince all the factions in Dark World to work together not from fear, but from allegiance. Kamek didn’t want that because he feared Boom Boom’d make a democracy.”

“Would you have?”

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“Oh Brighton, no. Boom Boom doesn’t trust the Goombas to vote with their minds,” Boom Boom said. “He would have done something more like a--”

“Hey, knock off the chatter!” one of the Koopatrols shouted.

“I am King Bowser! Don’t you DARE tell me what to do or you’ll end up with a fiery dessert.”

The Koopatrol walked in front of the cell bars. “The Emperor has informed us that you no longer possess your magical abilities after your recent fight with Mario. The only threat you would pose--”

Bowser roared, shaking the foundations of the prison cell and knocking the Koopatrol onto the ground.

No longer did they interrupt their discussion.

“Go on,” Bowser said. “I want to know... how did all of this happen? Was this all a mistake for me to leave?”

“It may have been,” Boom Boom said. “You needed a rest. You needed to come to grips with yourself, because you were certainly NOT yourself when you left. But Boom Boom just didn’t account on... well, the craziness. Uncle Psycho Kamek going, uh, psycho... the Koopalings dividing between Larry and Ludwig, and then Kamek propping up Bowser Jr... General Guy’s insurgency, funded by Game Guy of course... it was turning into chaos, and then Kamek and Kammy apparently decided that since those with royal blood had the power to be resurrected, they might as well use your father-- Morton, Boom Boom means. At least that’s what the others here have told.”

“What idiots.”

“Well, it ended the crisis.”

“And five of my sons are imprisoned, as well as my best friend and probably most of my lieutenants.”

“Actually, most of them fled into exile,” Boom Boom said. “Boom Boom hears Whomp King was out near Glitzville, and Big Bertha was amassing troops in the Blocheep Sea, not that it matters anymore. Only King Bob-omb submitted to his rule; General Guy is still fighting in guerilla attacks in the countryside according to rumors.”

One of the other prisoners, that rascal Lakithunder, spoke up. “General Guy’s on the run now. Anti Guy got captured a few weeks ago so it’s probably not much longer.”

“That’s unfortunate...”

“I do have to say, though,” said another prisoner, a Buzzy Beetle named Chan. “Your son the Conqueror led an admirable rebellion. If he had just had a little more help he would have defeated Morton, I believe.”

“The Conqueror?”

Boom Boom laughed and then coughed. “Iggy. Kamek trained him well in the art of magic, and he used illusions and spells to take down most of Morton’s armies. All of the Koopalings except for Roy joined him, but... Morton was too strong. That’s what Boom Boom was told, at least.”

That made Bowser proud, that a son he regarded as weak could be such a surprising threat. Maybe the Koopalings were all more powerful than he suspected. They were Royals, after all.

“So... is there any way we can defeat this man?” Bowser asked.

“We did it before, so... Actually, Boom Boom doesn’t know,” Boom Boom said.

They did it before, but they were all young, infused with the passions of youth and the vibrancy that was a clean and ambitious revolution. Bowser had the perfect origin as a neglected Prince come back to seize what was his. This endeavor here almost seemed petty in comparison.

And Bowser himself would soon be destroyed in a magical incantation to restore Morton’s body.

“I have a plan,” Bowser said. “But I don’t know if we can manage it like this.”

“So... we need to escape?”

“We need luck.”