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The Glory of Bowsette
Chapter 18: Wherein Bowser Cries a Lot

Chapter 18: Wherein Bowser Cries a Lot

Bowser cried.

He touched the top of his head, feeling nothing there but the red patch of hair that had always been there, here inside this oversized body to fit his undersized soul.

Down forty floors underneath the ground, in this prison from what used to be the Koopa Bros. Fortress.

Those four... those imbeciles. What he’d give to be around them these days, in a life that wasn’t filled with utter misery. But they went missing shortly after Mario defeated them in their own hideout. They had apparently fled Bowser’s inevitable revenge, abandoning their identities and slipping into a new life in First Letter World.

They were probably right to do so. Bowser’s temperament back then was... unforgiving. But looking back, surely he would have kept them around. They were loyal, crafty, and while they weren’t too bright, they were tenacious enough that they would have served him well in other plans. They would probably have been much more successful than the Broodals, that’s for sure.

That didn’t happen. Bowser was instead captured and sent to prison, awaiting a trial he knew nothing about, with no visitors and no company. He appeared to the sole prisoner in the entire floor, as if he was so special that they would reserve this honor just for him.

Bowser clutched at his chest. His thick, muscle-bound chest, hard to the touch and firm like the monster she was. She hated herself.

Her time as Bowsette had been the best time of his life. Better than overthrowing Morton Koopa; better than crushing Shisai’s rebellion; better than all the parties she ruined, tournaments she crashed, heroes and villains she defeated.

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

Bowser wanted nothing more than to return to that time, but all she could do was sit in this holding cell and continue to cry.

He-- stop it. HE.

Bowser was no longer Bowsette. That time was over. HE was done.

There was a rattling from the nearby elevator as its rickety chains pulled down a passenger. It was a small pig wearing glasses, and one who seemed to have imbibed substances shortly before arriving, from the way he stumbled towards this cell.

Not directly looking Bowser in the eye, the pig spoke. “You don’t know me, I don’t know you,” he said. “This is how this works. I’m Professor Chops. They subpoenaed me into this and now I’m going to be your defense attorney. That okay?”

“...Yes,” Bowser said, softly.

“You sure you don’t want to be your own counsel? You’re allowed. You’re certainly allowed it. I do NOT have to help you here if you don’t need it.”

“It’s fine.”

Professor Chops groaned. “This is going to ruin my career, isn’t it...” He started pacing back and forth in front of Bowser’s cell. Bowser didn’t even know why it was locked, like this. With no other prisoners, no guards, and an elevator that didn’t even work, what use was it to put him in a cramped enclosure except to torture him?

Oh, that’s exactly what it was.

“We’re going to have to settle on an insanity plea,” Chops said. “Do you think you can pull it off? Pretend like the Super Crown was messing with your mind, caused you to do stupid things that violated all the treaties in the world? I mean, kidnapping the Princess is ne thing, but pulling off a coup under the guise of a busty woman... they just aren’t gonna believe this... You’ll have to act positively loopy. I mean, you’ve gotten mind controlled before. Just pretend Cackletta did it, yeah!”

Back when Bowser was Bowletta...

Ugh.

He wanted to curl up in a little ball and stop existing. That would make him feel a lot better than he did right now.

Bowser stopped listening to Chops as he prattled on about a trial that was sure not to be of any real investigative substance. And then he fell asleep, right then and there, just to let the time pass.